“Rosalie, did Kerdik just… I heard a noise that sounded like a kiss.” My dad’s voice came to me confused, with a hint of sharpness to it.
“Kerdik’s my friend,” I answered, trying not to feel weird. It was hard to remember that my dad had front row tickets to our conversations. He was so still; it was easy to forget he was there.
“Indeed, I am.” Kerdik lifted my tangles and draped them over his shoulder, burying his nose in the tresses. His deep inhale made me cuddle closer to him while I pet Hamish with clumsy fingers. “You smell a little like him.”
“Him?”
“Bastien. You’re wearing his shirt, so you smell a little like him. Except your hair. That’s still purely you.”
My eyelids felt weighted, and I knew Hamish’s presence tipped the sleepiness I still felt from so much blood loss. “I like the way Bastien smells. Like cinnamon and Christmas.”
Kerdik chuckled, and the deep sound vibrated his chest I was resting against. He played idly with my fingers, examining how the ring he’d given me sparkled in the lamplight. It needed precious little light to dance for my amusement. The stones were so clear and brilliant; it was hard to look away. “Do you like your ring?”
I nodded, transfixed by the light prisms trapped in the stones. “Not like. Love. It’s the most beautiful thing that was ever mine.”
I could feel Kerdik’s gaze shift from the ring to my face, studying me while I enjoyed the sight of my gift that never stopped sparkling. He leaned in, his whisper tickling the shell of my ear to ramp up the intimacy that came natural to us. “Funny. I was just going to say the same thing about you.”
I gave him a little smirk as if to say, “Oh, you.”
He settled more comfortably in the chair, gearing up to hold me for however long I needed it – the mark of a good friend. “Get some sleep, darling. Your body’s burning through a lot of magic to heal you.”
I yawned again, my forehead resting in the crook of his neck. “Alright, Kerdik. Love you.”
“Rosalie,” my dad said in warning, but I was too tired to address it.
I closed my heavy eyelids, my heart warming at Kerdik’s tender whisper of, “I love you, too.”
Swept off my Feet
I was woken by Link, who had the look of being up all night. Though I knew he didn’t need sleep, it was clear the torture Mad was up to had taken longer than expected. “Time to wake, wee Rose. Mad needs ye downstairs.”
I rubbed my eyes and tried to swing my legs from Kerdik’s grip, but he held me tighter. “Your healer would have your hide if you tried to walk now. You’re supposed to be in bed. Link, take her just like this. See she doesn’t try to walk at all.” Kerdik handed me over to Link’s overly muscled and tattooed arms as if I was a sleeping child – careful and steady. Link was thoughtful enough to sweep Bastien’s flannel down across the backs of my knees, so my butt didn’t hang out for all to see. Kerdik inspected the bottoms of my feet. “Her feet shouldn’t touch the floor. I’ll know if they have.”
Though I had no reason not to trust Link, I didn’t feel right being parted from Kerdik. Mid-nap as I was, I voiced my bleat of concern without a filter. “You’re staying up here?” Hamish barely roused, still sleeping on my stomach, holding his bushy tail while he used my boobs like a squishy pillow.
Kerdik lifted my hand and pressed it to his cheek to savor the tenderness that was growing precious between us. I realized that I needed his strength and protection as much as he needed someone to be soft and kind to him. After infinite lifetimes of people recoiling, shrieking and running from him, it was the kindness he craved most of all. “You’ll be safe with Link. I’ve no doubt Madigan’s got Roland on his last breath. I need to try a few more rounds of waking your father, and I think he’d rather you not be here for it.”
“Huh?” I was suddenly more alert.
“Go on, Rosalie. I’ll try anything at this point. I don’t care about the pain, if it gets me closer to being able to live again. You should go with your friend. I don’t want you to hear me cry out.”
“Stop this! I don’t like you in pain!” My voice turned bossy as my spine stiffened. “Kerdik, don’t you dare hurt my father. He can’t tell you when it’s too much if I’m not here. I’m serious. We can find a way without hurting him, I’m sure of it.”
“Oh, sweet girl, it’s alright. What a tender heart you still have. When I’m restored to myself, I’ll need to thank Lane for seeing that your soul was spared the darkness that usually corrodes a person by your age. She did well, preserving the goodness in you.”
I rolled my eyes and mimed talking with my hand. “Blah, blah, blah. Unless you’re going to tell me you’ve come to your senses and won’t let Kerdik hurt you, I don’t want to hear it.”
I huffed at my father’s chortle, like he thought I was five and I told him monsters might get him if he checked under the bed. I knew now more than ever that monsters were real. I’d just been curled up in the most formidable one’s lap.
Kerdik waved off Link, who, despite the bravado he wore around his neck like a Hawaiian lei, was wary to be around Kerdik for this long. “If this door is locked when you bring her back, then take her to Bastien, but see that her feet don’t touch the floor.”
“Aye. But Bastien’s not here, Master Kerdik.”
“Where is he?” Kerdik and I asked in unison.
Link looked uncomfortable ratting out his bro, causing an ominous warning to churn in my gut. “After Mad got Roland’s confession tha Rosie was telling the truth, he took off for the local pub. Mad’s still trying to work the remedy for King Urien out of the sodden lad. Bastien didn’t need to be there for tha.”
Kerdik’s temper was hard to predict, but it waned in a sad understanding that felt something like progress between my BFF and my boyfriend. “Yes, well, I guess he’s earned a night of drowning his sorrows. Take her to her brother’s room, then, if this door’s locked when you bring her back up. Then come straight to me with anything you work out of Roland that could cure Urien.”
“Aye, sire.” Link hiked me up in his arms, ready to get away from Kerdik. “Let’s go, lass. Your strapping fiancé’s got a gift for ye.”
I swallowed my dread as I tried to psych myself up for whatever awaited me in the dungeon.
Roland’s Fingers, and Kerdik’s Secret
For all his brash and bold behaviors, Link was careful with me as he walked down the stone steps I’d swept with Reyn. We’d worked on cleaning the basement so many days ago, that they piled into weeks. We’d painted the concrete dungeon walls a bright white to liven up the place for the children, since Lane didn’t think she’d have much use for her dungeon in the traditional sense. Coming down into the long room that housed a row of cells on both walls running the length of it, my heart started to race when I heard moans of anguish.
This was supposed to be my playground.
Though I didn’t really know Link enough to lean on him, my arms wrapped around his neck all the same. Link leaned his cheek to my forehead. “Aw, you’re just a wee kitten. Best get this over quick, then.”
I saw the pool of blood before I saw the cowering, naked man. Madigan was leaning against the bars inside a cell near the back, his arms crossed over his chest like he was standing outside a liquor store, trying to bum a smoke. He was taller than any man I’d ever seen in real life, but in the dungeon, he looked impossibly larger, startling me anew with his sheer girth. He idly twirled a knife in his hand as if it was a lighter, or something to play with to pass the time. Roland was at his feet with his back to me, writhing in a puddle of his own blood.
Jean-Luc had his doctor bag opened, and was fishing through it for a sharper razor. I could pick the thoughts out of his head easy enough. “Something with a finer edge to make the cuts small but painful.”
I was frozen in Link’s arms, ice traveling through my veins with lightning speed and deafening precision.
This is my home. This is my life now.
Link k
icked his foot to the bars as we neared, drawing Mad’s eyes so he knew we were there. “Oh, grand. I was worried his light would go out before she got here.” Mad leaned down and grabbed a chunk of Roland’s brown hair, forcing a low groan from the man who’d dominated me not too long ago. Mad’s voice turned gravelly and harsh. “Your witch is here. Look at her, all terrifying and menacing. Look at all you threw away over this wee little kitten.”
Link let out a laugh that felt totally inappropriate. “Ha! That’s what I just called her.”
Roland’s back was still to me, so Mad dragged him around so I could see his face. Correction – what was left of his face. I shrieked in horror at the things that were missing. His left eye was the most terrifying, drawing my gaze like a magnet to the cavity that had blood spilling out of it in streaks like red tears. I clung to Link, afraid to get nearer. This wasn’t the Princess Bride; this was a full-on snuff film I’d landed myself smack in the middle of. “Did you do this, Madigan? Did you… Did you cut off his ear?!” It seemed unendingly cruel for a man who had no hearing in his left ear to saw off the same appendage on a man.
Madigan looked down to confirm his conquest. “Aye. Of course. What, did ye want the right one?”
I gaped at Madigan, flabbergasted as the horror washed over me in waves of terror. “Did I want the right one? What is the matter with you? You… and he… How could you do that?!”
Mad picked up the actual ear from the cell floor and thumbed it. “It’s my signature. When I served in my queen’s army, I got to keep one token from each lad I questioned. What I wouldn’t give to have my jar of ears back again.” He sighed at the missed opportunity.
I shook like a leaf in Link’s arms. Link was a simple kind of dude, who I’m guessing didn’t have much experience comforting women he wasn’t trying to sleep with. “There, there,” he offered awkwardly. “What did ye think we meant by ‘torture’?”
“I never asked for this! I wanted Roland to get a fair trial and go to prison so he could change from being a total jackwagon! I didn’t ask you to permanently mutilate him!”
“It’s no trouble,” Madigan offered, as if this was some great favor he was doing me. “What I need ye to do is see if ye can hear his mind. We’ve been keeping him lucid enough to speak and reason, but he’s not telling us what we need to know.”
“I’m not a mind-reader, Mad. I can’t hear people’s thoughts at random. I can hear the healers and the animals and my dad because their entire language is hidden. I shouldn’t be here!” My fearful gaze fixed on my fake fiancé. “And neither should you.”
“This is the only way, Princess. Even now, Duke Roland is stubborn. Even now, he would rather see your father be buried with him than restore King Urien to you.”
Against my wishes, Link brought me closer. We were right next to the cell bars now. My body recoiled, but it had nowhere to go. I felt like a scared cat trying to climb up a tree to get away from a dog with the most vicious bite.
Link’s voice chimed in where I chickened out. “Do ye see what’s happened, Roland? Rosie’s going to heal just fine. She’s going to sit on Avalon’s throne, if tha’s what she wishes. We’ll find a way to bring King Urien back, with or without ye. It’s just a matter of how long ye want to suffer, or if you’ve finally had enough tha ye want Mad to put ye out of your misery.”
Roland spat out a mixture of insult and blood on the floor. His voice was raspy, but still held the defiance and pride I’d come to expect. “I’d rather die than see that brat on Avalon’s throne. I’ll spare Uncle Urien the sight of his daughter causing the fall of the kingdom he loved.”
My indignation brought me out of my fear a miniscule amount. “Dude, you are such a jag! Why would I sit on the throne, first off, and secondly, why would I be the fall of the kingdom? How dangerous could I possibly be that you’re this afraid of me? I haven’t done a single thing to hurt Avalon. I haven’t challenged any policies or started any riots. I’m just a babysitter at this point!”
Roland had drool mingled with blood dripping from his chin. “You brought Province 9 home again. I didn’t think that was possible.”
“And you’re punishing me for it? That was all Lane, anyway. All I did was not die in the well.”
Roland sneered up at me from his place on his knees with a shaky upper lip. “Pity.”
I gaped at him. “How are you this bullheaded?”
Mad motioned to Jean-Luc, who handed him a pair of heavy duty snippers. Though Mad wasn’t given to smiling, the expression on his face was akin to peace. There was a calm that flitted over him like a thousand precious fairies when he was on the job he’d been trained to do. His fluid, unquestioning movements were well-rehearsed and done with confidence. I hated to think that this was Mad in his element, but as he picked up Roland’s hand, I saw the sigh of relief that came from doing a task you enjoyed. For some it was playing the piano or learning a subject they excelled in at school. For Mad, it was torture. Pure, unfettered torture.
I scarcely understood what was going on when Madigan brought the bloody fist up to the light. I whimpered when I noticed there were already three fingers missing from Roland’s hand, and Mad was about to take the fourth.
“No! No! Don’t do it!” I shouted, but no one listened to me. My howls matched Roland’s when I heard the telltale snip that meant Roland was left with only his thumb. I whipped my head away from the macabre sight, burying my face in Link’s neck so I could wail into the flesh. Of all the things I could have begged for in that moment, I needed my bestie there with me. Or more ideally, I needed to be out of this dungeon and in our apartment with him. “Judah!” I sobbed, knowing he would never make me watch something so terrible in real life. “Where are you, Judah?”
Link had no idea what to do with a crying woman, so he shifted uncomfortably a few times before swaying me back and forth like an oscillating fan. I felt cold inside, surrounded by monsters who enjoyed this sort of thing. “Mad, I don’t think this was such a grand idea. Jays, I wasn’t expecting tha. Wee kitten can’t even look at Roland, and I don’t think she can hear him.”
Madigan sighed. “Give it a go, Rosie. Try and hear anything he’s saying. Can ye pick out a word or two?”
“Roland? I’m so sorry this is happening! I just wanted my dad back, not to have you slowly killed like this. I’m sorry!” I scrambled around for any sort of reason I could give him to excuse my part in all of it. “I don’t like violence like this. I’m a vegetarian! I just want to be able to pal around with my dad. Please don’t keep him from his kingdom just to spite me. You hate me, sure, but you can’t possibly hate him this much.”
Roland was practically deranged from the pain, so I’m not sure how much he was hearing me. “Urien will sleep as long as I say!”
I swallowed, trying to find my bearings so we could get this over with as soon as possible. Despite all he’d done to me, I wanted the suffering to be over for Roland, so I tried to get the truth out of him as quick as I could. “Look, no matter what, my dad’s coming back. Kerdik’s working on him now. It’s just a matter of time before he cracks whatever spell you’ve got on him.”
“He’s welcome to try for all of eternity!” Then Roland howled as a fresh dose of agony swept through him. I could tell his body was still in shock as it processed the pain in waves.
“Do you think Kerdik is a patient guy? Do you think he’s a forgiving guy? He’ll punish you for this way worse than Mad ever could.”
Madigan seemed to take offense at this. “Hey, now. I’m doing a grand job here.”
“I’ll be dead soon anyways. What does Kerdik’s wrath matter to me?”
Mad gave his naked thigh a kick. “Nah. Ye only think you’re on the brink of death. You’ve got miles to go before tha. Not to fret. I won’t let ye die before we’ve gotten every last bit of truth from your lying lips. If that takes months, I don’t mind. I’ve got nothing but time. Time to let your good eye watch while Lane and Rosie clean up Province 9. Time to let ye
see your throne taken over by a couple of women who do the job far better than ye ever did. Time to watch your best friend marry the lass ye hate. Oh, I wouldn’t let ye miss tha. Why do ye think I left ye with one good eye?”
“How could you do this to Bastien?” I roared at Roland, my rage poking through the clouds of my fear. “He loved you, and you broke his heart with this.”
It was hard to tell, but Roland actually appeared contrite at my scolding. “Bastien’s head is twisted in your direction. He doesn’t have to think about what’s best for Avalon. He’s not a duke. He’s a fool in love. I can’t fault him for that, but I also can’t let him walk headfirst into a witch’s arms.”
“I’m not a witch, you tool! Don’t you think that if I had superpowers, I’d use them to, I don’t know, heal myself?”
Roland was beyond seeing reason. “I had to protect Bastien from you! I’m the Duke of Province 4! I’m doing what I have to do to protect my people. You’re a danger to them, no matter how many powerful men you take into your bed. Bewitching them with what magic lies between your thighs, no doubt.”
I gasped, scandalized that he’d go there. Though really, nothing was off-limits at this point.
Link growled and moved over to Jean-Luc. “Hold onto her a minute. Let me have a go at him, Mad. No one talks about an Untouchable’s lady like tha.”
Madigan shook his head. “No. You’ll lose your temper, just like ye did with the last one in Éireland. We need this lad alive so we can get Urien back.”
Roland seethed at me. “I’ll hold out long enough to watch Master Kerdik turn fool for you more than he already has. It’ll be my pleasure to watch him mutate you into a monster, just like he did with Tara.”
My nose crinkled. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
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