I’m moved out of the dungeons and through the corridors of The Keep. I’m drained of energy, but I try to stay lucid. Not sensing anyone with us, I rasp, “Where are we going?”
He turns into a room and lays me on a soft bed, “Where you don’t have to worry about anyone bothering you.”
I glance around, realizing I’m in his chambers. “What about Jack? Is he alright?”
Solas runs his fingers through his dark hair with a heavy sigh. “He’s fine. What were you thinking? You’ve already been through that once. Why would you force yourself to do it again, let alone put Jack through it?” He sits on the edge of the bed.
“We didn’t have a choice,” I explain. “My Darkness is growing, and it’s transferring to Jack through our bond.”
“It can do that?” he asks.
I nod, examining the ceiling. “And after today, I knew I couldn’t let it go on.”
“What happened?”
“It’s nothing. We got in a fight… I didn’t fight back.”
Solas’ bright blue eyes darken, his pupils dilating. “Did he put his hands on you?”
I excuse, “It wasn’t him. The Darkness is changing him. I have to figure out a way to cleanse my essence so I can cleanse his.”
Calm and collected, Solas rises from the bed, then leaves. I jump out of bed, making it to the door as he closes it behind him. When I open it, he’s gone. “Shit,” I lament. I know he’s going after Jack, but I don’t know where Jack is. I close my eyes and follow the deep musk of Solas’ scent. I hear the thundering commotion from Jack’s room and speed to them. Jack is pushing himself off the floor as Solas breathes heavy inside the doorway with his hands fisted at his sides. “Solas! Wait!”
Jack stands tall, ready. “No, Ivy. We made a promise to each other. You should go.”
“What? No! It’s not your fault!” I implore to my Chief in Command, “Solas! It wasn’t his fault!”
Solas moves to the door, closing it in my face as he states, “He’s right. You should go.” The door clicks, there’s a quick illumination of blue around the seal, then it disappears.
I try to open the door, but it doesn’t budge. I can’t hear anything. I slam my fist on the door. It does nothing. I ram my shoulder into it. It doesn’t even crack. I persist banging on its face, “Solas! Open the door! Jack! Please! Stop!”
Hours later, I’m camped outside the door, sitting against the wall across the hall. The blue light returns around the door, fading just as fast. The lock clicks and the door opens. My focus remains at the base of the door as Solas walks through the threshold. He stops before me, but I don’t acknowledge him. He keeps walking. Movement catches my eyes inside the room. I look up to Jack’s impassive expression, blood, bruises, and lacerations covering him from his face to his hands. “Jack,” I whisper. As if he doesn’t see me there, he closes the door again, the lock clicking back into place.
Chapter 9
“I asked you to come to me with anything you may need,” Raphael reprimands, pacing continuous circles around me in the Throne Room. Our training began hours ago. I was late to the party, and he wasn’t happy with me—still isn’t. “There could be a Virtue of Light on the surface. I could have hunted them down.”
I contradict, “That would have taken days. We didn’t have days. The bond had to be broken immediately.”
Raphael disputes, “It would not have been a problem if you were able to heal yourself of the Darkness. It was my understanding that you were doing so with every essence you have reaped. I petitioned to the others that the Darkness lingering was harder for you to divest because of your mother. If I had known the truth, we wouldn’t have wasted time on your first day of training.”
Guilt is all I feel. Everything is my fault. Always. I mumble, “Are you sure I’m the one from your prophecy? I’ve done nothing but disappoint all of you.”
Halting before me, he states firmly, “If that’s what you believe, I will prove you wrong. Give me your hand.” I hesitate, not used to this side of him. He turns my left hand, palm up, slicing it with a double-edged dagger. My wings burst out, ready for a fight. Giving him a dirty look, I try to pull my hand back. He seizes it by the wrist, glaring down at me, “Heal.” I growl, concentrating on the skin mending back together. After eight seconds, it is almost finished. Raphael slashes a longer gash across my forearm. “Concentrate,” he barks.
I grit my teeth, “I am.”
The cut in my palm finishes healing as the one in my arm is half way mended. I feel his body shift as he motions to wound me again. I block him, “Give me time.”
“You have no time.” With angelic speed, he whips the blade around my right wrist blocking him, slicing deep across the tendon, rendering my hand useless.
My body reacts, kicking him across the room. Blood drips to the floor from my arm and hands, my chest rising and falling in heavy pants. My Darkness has made itself known. There’s nothing stopping it. “What the fuck is wrong with you!”
Raphael rises, dusting himself off. He ponders lightly, “Where are your wounds, Ivy?”
I look to my arms, double checking my wrist and palm. In my wonderment, my Darkness recedes.
He strolls towards me, “Just as I thought. You heal faster when your Darkness emerges.” He retrieves his blade, keeping his eyes on me, “It is keeping a tight hold on your abilities, allowing you to only use a portion of your potential.”
“More of a reason to get rid of it.”
“Ah,” Raphael says, shaking a finger beside his head. “Therein, lies the problem. To heal yourself of the Darkness, you need the full potential of your healing abilities. If your Darkness holds that potential, you must persuade it into destroying itself.”
I speak of my disbelief, “That’s not possible.”
“Not with the way they’re training you,” Solas calls from the entrance of the Throne Room, leaning against the threshold.
I’m still pissed for what he did to Jack. Raphael examines Solas strolling to us with his hands in the pockets of his slacks. My mentor claims, “We have trained countless other warriors through the eons. If she wants to defeat the Horsemen, including herself, she will learn it from us.”
Solas shakes his head, keeping his calm and relaxed composure. He directs his words to Raphael as if I’m not present. “Ivy isn’t like those you’ve trained before. She is unique. That’s why she is Teloch. I’m sure you agree.”
Raphael nods once. “That does not mean our training is ineffective.”
Solas scratches his temple, “No. More like…” His hand falls to his side, a grin catching his lips as he fights it back, “Counterproductive.” Raphael is silent. Solas suggests, “If you let me train her, I can convince her Darkness to give up.”
Raphael scoffs. “You have nothing significant to add to her training. Your own iniquity will only cause her Darkness to manifest.”
I ask, “What’s the harm in letting him train me as well?”
Solas redefines, “Not just myself. We will need the Griffins, Alice, Eric, Jack, and possibly another if they are able to come to The Keep. She is used to training with us, and we know how her mind works.”
Michael intrudes, “Absolutely not. You will ruin all we are working to achieve. Ivy needs our mentoring to guide her, not your unorthodox ways filling her head with nonsense as you have already done.”
Solas adds, “The Apocalypse will not be won by following your rules of war. She is Teloch. This is the end. Nothing is as it was before. Ivy is Teloch for a reason. Excuse me if this is out of line, but you are attempting to make her into someone she isn’t. You are hindering her ability to fulfill the prophecy, not ushering her success.”
Michael stands rigid, “It is not your decision. My answer remains the same.”
Solas bows to Michael with respect, “As you wish.” He winks at me before turning for the exit. Jack is waiting in the hallway. Together, as if nothing has happened between them, they head towards the east side of The Keep.
What just happened here? I vowed to give them my full cooperation, but Solas is right. They’re trying to make me someone I’m not. This isn’t me. Teloch is just a name. I’m Ivy Harris, Pestilence to Darkness… Well, everyone else’s Darkness… I have to figure out how to get rid of my own.
Michael warns, “Put your hands on an Original again, you will answer to me.” I don’t respond, my mind reeling over what an angel as old as him is capable of. He notifies, “You’re excused. Training is over for the day.”
It’s only midday, so I go to the new café down the corridor, wash the blood from my arms and hands, make a cup of coffee, and find a comfortable spot on the couch. It’s quite in here. I feel like I have a moment to think. What I wouldn’t give for a cigarette right now.
I contemplate Michael’s threat. What could he do to me if I truly screwed up? He’s ancient. His skills and knowledge, as well as the others’, surely outweigh what I’m capable of. I’m a baby compared to them… And I let them treat me as such. The old me would never allow that. Why am I even here? How is someone as young and inexperienced as me expected to defeat all the Horsemen? They’re the ones who have been around for forever. Why can’t they take out the Horsemen themselves? I may have taken one down, but what if it was a fluke?
Laying back on the couch, I cross an arm over my eyes. “You were never good at that,” Jack taunts.
Part of me wants to jump off this couch and rush into his arms to be sure he’s alright. The other part of me doesn’t want to open my eyes for the fear he won’t really be there. The latter wins and I remain unmoving. “At what?”
I hear him move towards me. He lifts my legs, sits down, then lays them across his lap. “Self-loathing.”
“I am not self-loathing,” I retort.
“Good, because usually, you end up mastering whatever it is bothering you. There’s no sense in wallowing.” I scoff, rolling my eyes beneath my arm. Jack drums his fingers on my shin. “It’s weird, huh; Not being able to feel each other?”
I move my arm behind my head to see him. “With everyone in The Keep being angelic, there’s always that constant flutter of adrenaline. With you… When I see you…there’s still a pull. It’s just not as strong as it used to be.”
“I thought it was just me,” he notes, rubbing my leg.
“It’s a little bit of a relief,” I tell him. He looks to me with a puzzled expression. I giggle. “Not like that. I mean, it’s a relief not to constantly feel like I’m being pulled in every direction.”
Jack nods absentmindedly, “I get that.”
He’s oddly quiet a moment, prompting me to ask, “Are you alright?”
His glances to me with a small smile, “Yeah.”
I sit up, pulling my legs from his lap, crossing one beneath me, resting my other boot on the ground. “What about Solas?”
Jack sighs, tight-lipped. “The Chief and I made a promise to each other when we brought you back to The Keep. No matter the cost, we would put you first—your mission, your protection—and we wouldn’t let our petty differences get in the way of that. There has always been an unspoken truth to our promise; That if either of us should fail, the other would kill them.”
My eyes widen, “He was going to kill you?”
Jack shakes his head. “No. He knew he couldn’t. Though he should have with the way I treated you, he understood I didn’t have control over it.”
“What happened in there?”
He leans forward on his elbows, lacing his hands together. “He placed a ward on the door so no one would be able to enter or hear the fighting. I know what I did could never be forgiven, forgotten, or looked over. I deserved every bit of that fight and did my best to let it happen and not fight back.”
“Why? It wasn’t you, Jack. I know what that feels like. You all forgave me for what I did. Why is it alright for you to forgive me but not yourself?”
“Because I knew the signs and ignored them. My parents, Eric, Alice, and even Cass tried warning me, but I didn’t listen. I’ve known it’s been getting worse and didn’t say anything. I knew if I did, the Originals would send me back to Bastille and strip my status as your guardian. I denied it. You had no warning. It hit you as soon as you made your oath with Lucifer. You didn’t know how to handle it like you do now.”
“Is it as bad for you since we’re no longer bonded?”
“It’s easier to control.”
I take his hand, scooting closer to him. “I’m not angry with you, Jack. I want you to know that.”
There’s hurt in his eyes as he questions, “You’re not afraid to be near me?”
A small giggle builds in my core until I’m in a fit of laughter, my shoulders shaking with the intensity. I’m in tears, clenching my stomach. Jack begins to smile. It’s not his million dollar smile, but a smile of contentment and my heart feels lighter that his guilt is not as heavy as when he sat down.
He rolls his eyes, “Stupid question.” I wipe the tears from my cheeks, my laughter fading. “Does this change your mind about us?”
That sobers me up quickly, my face burning as my smile falls easily. “I can’t say, ‘yes,' but I grew up watching it happen between my adoptive parents. It’s not something I would allow in a relationship.”
Jack squeezes my hand, his crestfallen gaze regarding our entwined fingers. He admits low, “I’ve never hit a woman out of anger—not even in battle. It’s not something I ever want to experience again. It’s like it’s taken a piece of my being. It makes me question all that I am, all I’ve become.”
“We’re going to fix this, Jack. I promise I’ll find a way.”
“If anyone could do it, it would be you. You surprise me every day with your strength.” His eyes bore into mine, their vivid green drawing me in. “I love you.”
I know if I answer him, anything I say could ruin this moment. Instead, I wrap my arms around his neck, embracing him with a silent oath that everything will be alright.
Dreams of sinister storms fill the night with dread. I awaken, shivering. Ambiguous flashes of shadows call to me, and a murder of crows pull me under a burning sheen of dark smoke. A chill has set into my bones, warning of something more to the dream I have yet to grasp. I run a hot bath and soak until I can feel my muscles relax with the warmth.
The War Room is void of books and the various materials Alice had strewn across the table before. She stands in the back of the room with her hands in her jacket. She doesn’t look happy. I inquire, “Are we not studying today?”
She puts a finger to her lips. Pulling out a recording device from her jacket pocket the size of my hand, she places it on the table as she whispers softly in my ear, “I hope you don’t mind, but I recorded us studying last time. I thought it would help me teach you. Good thing too.” She presses the play button. Our voices echo in the room as if that moment was recreated precisely, down to the rustling of paper and the pen scratches as I wrote.
I murmur in her ear, “Why are we whispering?”
Solas opens the door to the War Room, pointing to his head for me to open my mind to him.
I ask him, What’s going on? Why are we being hush-hush?
“We’re getting out of here for the day.”
Alice marches around the table, and I follow her, halting outside of the door to talk to Solas. Why? Where are we going?
He raises his hand to the door, a blue illumination casting an Enochian script above the doorknob. When it fades, he orders, “Go to The Common.”
We stowaway through the corridors in silence. Reaching The Common, Jack, Eric, and Cass are waiting for us, their wings ready to take flight. I ask again, “What are we doing?”
Solas warns, “Don’t speak out loud. We’re going on a trip. Let’s go before we’re seen.”
I judge the Griffin sentries on the face of the mountain as I spread my wings. Isn’t it a little too late for that?
“They are your legion. They know where we are going. Thea is staying behind. None of th
em will say anything.”
Solas takes off into the sky, the feathers of his black wings glistening in the morning sun. The rest of us follow over the sea as fast as we can. Jack flanks my side, “What do you want to do, Sunshine?”
I yell over the wind in my ears, “I don’t even know what’s going on! Why are we leaving The Keep?”
Jack looks to Alice, “You didn’t tell her?”
Alice growls, “I think this is a stupid idea. Azrael will know.”
Eric interjects, “I spoke with him. He agreed it would be good for her.”
“Hello!” I holler. “I’m right here! What the hell is going on? Where are we going?”
Solas grins back at me. “Hawaii!”
“Why?” I reiterate.
Jack answers, “The Chief and I don’t agree with how the Originals are training you. We want to train you as we always have. Just not today. Today, we’re having fun. You’re going to teach Cass and me to surf, and there’s a surprise later tonight.”
I counter, “The Originals are not stupid. They’re going to find out we left.”
Cass laughs, “We are counting on it! Azrael and Thea have a plan in place. You have nothing to worry about.”
I frown, mumbling, “Until we get back and Michael has my head.”
Solas turns over midair to regard me, “Lighten up, princess! I’ll even buy you a bottle of Jäger, and we’ll have a bonfire on the beach.”
I know this is wrong, but a considerable amount of my entire being wants this; let loose, have fun, forget for a few hours. I give him a crooked grin. Thank you.
He winks at me, then turns over to lead us to our destination.
We land on the sands of Polihale Beach, concealing our wings. It has the most stunning crystal blue waters I’ve ever seen. The silvery sands are backed by miles of hundred foot sand dunes framed by beautiful green cliffs. I can’t help but compare the waters against the cliffs to the eyes of the two men at my side. The wind is perfect for surfing. The only problem is, we don’t have any boards. I point out to Jack and Solas, “This place is amazing. Too bad nobody brought boards or bathing suits.”
The Helio Trilogy: Volumes 1-3 Page 80