"You don't have to say that.”
"It's true, Maggie. You're special. I knew that right away."
"You're really good for my ego.”
"You're really good for me."
She smiled. "But we're so different."
"Are we?"
"I need to go home, Jeremy."
"Tomorrow," he said.
She hesitated.
"By the time we drive back to San Francisco, it will be late to catch a flight. I think we should spend the night together. We can dance. We can tell each other all of our fantasies. We can even act some out. So, my little worrier, if you're determined to think about something, why don't you think about that?"
As if she could now think about anything else.
Chapter Nineteen
"Five card stud, jacks are wild," Lisa said as she dealt the cards out on the small table in the waiting room. He'd bought the cards in the hospital gift shop a half hour earlier, needing something to distract them. But he'd forgotten what a competitor Lisa could be.
He picked up his cards and groaned when he saw his hand. "Great. You're almost unbeatable, you know. Are these cards marked?"
Lisa smiled. "No. But just so you know, you do owe me two hundred dollars."
Nick stared at the packages of sweetener he'd swiped from the hospital cafeteria. There were at least ten on her side and only two on his. "That's two hundred dollars?"
"They're each worth ten dollars," she said.
"Says who?"
"Me. How many cards do you want?"
Nick took a look at his hand and sighed again. "I'll just stick with these. I'll be broke soon anyway."
"You're so easy. I'll bet ten." She tossed one packet onto the table.
"I'll see your ten and raise you ten."
"Feeling cocky, I see." Lisa tossed two more packages onto the table. "I'll call, since you have nothing left to bet.”
"Rub it in, why don't you?" He showed his hand. "Three aces."
Her jaw dropped open. "No way. You looked like you had two threes at best."
He grinned. "That is called bluffing, sweetheart."
She threw down her cards in disgust. "You must have cheated."
"You dealt."
"You cut the cards."
He laughed out loud. "You're a sore loser."
"I am not," she said, sitting back in a huff, her arms crossed in front of her chest.
"You still have more packets than me," he pointed out.
She straightened in her chair. "Okay, double or nothing."
"Forget it, I'm done.”
"You can't quit on a winning hand, Nick."
"Why not?"
"I deserve a chance to get my money back."
Nick leaned forward until their heads were almost touching. "I hate to break it to you, Lisa, but we're not playing for money, we're playing for artificial sweetener."
She made a face at him. "It's the principle."
He shook his head. "Does Raymond know how competitive you can be?"
"Yes, and he likes it. Because he's a shark in business, far worse than me." She shuffled the cards, her fingers flying with practiced speed.
"And you like that?" Nick asked, watching her, wishing she'd look at him instead of the cards.
"Of course. I admire him a great deal."
Funny how she never said the word love. "Do you think it will be easy to work together and live together at the same time?" he asked. "Or maybe you are already?" For some reason, that thought left a bitter taste in his mouth.
"No, we aren't," Lisa said, still shuffling the cards with restless fingers. "I have a nice one-bedroom condo in Studio City. I've enjoyed having my own place to decorate. I even wallpapered the bedroom myself."
"I remember the first time you put up wallpaper."
She grinned as she looked at him, her blue eyes sparkling. "The glue didn't stick, and in the middle of the night all the paper in our bedroom started falling down."
"And you ran around the room naked, trying to push it back up."
"I couldn't believe how much time I'd spent to have it fall apart. But this time I got it right."
His smile disappeared. This time she 'd gotten it right. Her life was so much better now, without him.
"I still kill plants, though," she said, watching him closely. "If it's any consolation."
"It is."
"That's what I figured." She threw the cards down, stood up and walked across the waiting room, then back again. She checked her watch. "It's been over three hours. How long could it take?"
"I don't know." He hated the look of worry that crossed her face. For a while, they'd managed to keep the fear at bay, but it was back.
"Maybe I should call my mother again."
"She has everything under control, Lisa."
"I know, but it would give me something to do." She paused. "I should be working on my cereal slogan."
Nick stroked his chin. "How about this? If you've got a brain, try our grain. Not bad, huh?"
She laughed. "That was beyond terrible."
"Like you've got anything better. At least you know your boss won't fire you."
"I still want to do a good job. I don't use our relationship to take advantage at work." She stopped abruptly, jerking to her feet as the surgeon entered the room. Nick felt every muscle in his body tense as he stood up, and he was more than a little grateful when Lisa's hand found its way into his.
"She's fine," the surgeon said, offering a bright smile.
"Oh, thank heavens," Lisa let out a long, relieved sigh.
"I want to keep her overnight, but if everything looks good in the morning, we'll send her home."
"That soon?" he asked in surprise.
"As long as she does well tonight, there's really no need to keep her here."
"I'm staying with her tonight," Lisa said. "I can't leave her alone all night in a hospital."
"That's fine. She's in recovery now. One of the nurses will be in shortly to take you to see her. She'll sleep for awhile, though."
"Thank you, doctor," Nick said.
The surgeon nodded, then left.
Lisa turned in Nick's arms and hugged him. "She's okay. She's really okay."
He squeezed her tightly, having the sudden urge to never let her go. "We made it."
Lisa smiled up at him. "Yeah, we made it."
'"Not everything has to turn out bad."
"I guess not."
He gazed into her eyes. "You shouldn't deny yourself the chance to have another child, Lisa. You would be a good mother."
Her smile disappeared, and her eyes darkened with a yearning he hadn't seen in a very long time. "It would be a risk. It's not like she—like our baby died of something specific. What if the same thing happened? What if there's something genetically wrong with me?"
"It could have been my genes."
"I don't see you rushing to have another child."
"I would do it again—with you."
Her eyes widened in shock. "That's not going to happen, Nick."
"Then I guess I won't have children, either."
"You and me, us, together," Lisa said, waving her hand in the air. "That was the problem, Nick. If you had a baby with someone else, it probably wouldn't happen again."
"Then why not you and Raymond?" He paused, giving her a chance to reply, but she didn't say a word. "You don't have to answer that, Lisa. I know why, because you're afraid. I'm afraid, too. That's why I could only do it again with you, because we both know what it feels like to lose a child. We would go into the situation knowing exactly the same things."
"We're not together any more."
His arms locked around her waist, mocking her statement.
"Let me go," she said.
"No." He leaned over and kissed her before she had time to close her mouth. He let his tongue dance along her lips and inside the warm cavern of her mouth.
Her hands tightened on his arms, but she didn't push him away. In fact, she
seemed to pull him closer, and when he deepened the kiss, he heard a soft sigh of delight. It undid him completely. He had only meant to kiss her briefly, but now he couldn't stop.
"Excuse me?" a voice said.
He let Lisa go, feeling somewhat shell-shocked to realize they were still standing in the middle of the hospital waiting room. Another minute, and he'd have ripped open her shirt and let his hands go where his mind had already wandered.
"Would you like to see your niece now?" a nurse asked, with a wry smile on her face.
"Of course." Lisa stepped away from Nick, patting her hair self-consciously. "We were so happy and relieved that our niece will be all right, I guess we got carried away."
"I know what it's like to be in love."
"But we're not in love. We're divorced," Lisa explained.
"Really? If my ex-husband had kissed me like that, I sure as heck wouldn't have divorced him." The nurse turned her back and walked to the door.
"Where was she eight years ago?" Nick muttered.
Lisa shot him a dark look, and they seemed to be right back where they'd started.
* * *
Lisa spent the night at the hospital in a fold-out futon chair that was very uncomfortable, but she hadn't really been trying to sleep. She'd been watching Mary Bea and thinking about everything that had happened in her life. Taking care of Mary Bea had brought back the maternal feelings she'd thought were dead and buried. Along with those feelings came thoughts of Nick. Things had changed between them in the few days they'd been together. Somehow they'd climbed the mountain of guilt and anger together and come down the other side. She didn't know how it had happened exactly. But she did know that she didn't hate him anymore. She didn't blame him for Robin's death. She didn't even hold him responsible for his behavior at the funeral. Drinking had been Nick's answer to the pain. Flight had been hers. How could she blame him for wanting to escape when she had done exactly the same thing?
Lisa checked her watch. It was past seven. The night before she'd been so busy with Mary Bea, trying to keep her entertained and unafraid of staying in the hospital, that she hadn't had a chance to call Raymond, and she needed to do that. He'd left several messages on her phone, each one tenser than the other.
She slipped out of the room and into the hallways. She moved to the end of the hall, to an empty waiting room and punched in Raymond's number. He was an early riser, so she didn't worry about waking him up. The phone rang several times, but no one answered. Finally, the machine answered in Raymond's no-nonsense voice.
Lisa waited for the beep, feeling strangely relieved that he wasn't there. "Hi, it's me. I'm sorry I couldn't get back to you yesterday. One of the kids had to go to the hospital. I hope to do some work today, and I'll talk to you later. Bye." She hung up the phone feeling unsettled. Where would Raymond be at seven-thirty on a Tuesday morning?
As she headed back down the hallway, she ran into her mother who was getting off the elevator. "You're here early," she said in surprise.
"I couldn't sleep. I was worried. I wanted to see how you and Mary Bea were."
"Mary Bea is asleep, and I'm fine."
Her mother's shrewd gaze swept across her face. "Are you really? I know how difficult this must have been for you. Coming back here—to this hospital."
"Well, it all worked out."
"Now you know you can do it," Silvia said.
"I don't know what you mean."
"Of course you do."
"Mom, please." She held up her hand. "I'm exhausted. I don't want to talk about anything right now, okay?"
Silvia nodded. "I understand."
"Did you hear from Maggie again?"
"She just left the one message yesterday afternoon that I told you about last night." Silvia paused. "Aunt Carmela thinks Maggie is in trouble."
"Well, for once I agree with Aunt Carmela. Maggie thinks Keith might still be alive. That's what she told Nick yesterday."
"Oh, dear." Silvia's eyes filled with worry. "Perhaps I should have asked her to come home instead of..."
"Instead of what?" Lisa asked, suddenly suspicious.
"Oh, nothing."
"You told her not to come back, didn't you?"
"I wouldn't do that. I just mentioned that it was good you and Nick had some time to spend together. But that's it. I certainly didn't know Mary Bea would get sick. I feel terrible about that."
"It's not your fault. Mom. I doubt whatever you said had any effect on Maggie anyway. She seems determined to find out the truth—whatever that is."
"Lisa, why don't you go back to Maggie's house, take a shower, change your clothes, and catch up on some sleep? I'll stay with Mary Bea."
Lisa immediately shook her head. "No, I can't leave her. Besides, the doctor said she can go home later this morning, so I'll just wait till then. Nick's with Roxy and Dylan. He said he'd get them off to school, then come down here."
Silvia smiled somewhat sadly. "You and Nick sound like a family."
They did sound like a family, and it was beginning to feel comfortable, cozy, loving, warm. But the kids didn't belong to her, and eventually their mother would come home and Lisa would go back to her own life, a life without children.
* * *
"I think it was a mistake to let you sleep alone last night," Jeremy said when Maggie answered her hotel room door.
She pulled her robe around her shoulders and wished Jeremy wasn't such an early bird. She was still half asleep and could feel her hair sticking up from her head.
"I didn't sleep a wink," Jeremy added. "I couldn't stop thinking about you." He slid into her room before she could think of asking him to wait while she changed. He kissed her before she could think of brushing her teeth. Not that he seemed to care, and once his mouth touched hers, she didn't much care either.
Maybe it had been a mistake to spend another night alone, but she just hadn't been able to take that leap. There were still too many unanswered questions in her head.
"I like you like this," Jeremy whispered against her mouth. "Beautiful and dazed and ready to go to bed with me."
"Uh—I'm still asleep."
"Good, then you won't resist." He picked her up and tossed her on the bed.
She squealed in protest, but he climbed on to the bed and pinned her arms over her head with one hand. Then he let his glance drift down the length of her body, pausing just long enough on her breasts to cause them to tingle. Finally, his gaze came back to rest on her face. He suddenly looked serious. "Call him," he said.
"What?" Maggie was having a little trouble following the conversation, considering Jeremy's crotch was resting against her upper thighs, and if they didn't have clothes on, if he slid forward just an inch or so, they could do all the things she'd dreamed about the night before—only this time he'd really be in the room.
"Maggie." Jeremy let go of her hands and snapped his fingers in front of her face.
"What?”
"Call him." Jeremy got off of her and sat on the edge of the bed. He tipped his head toward the phone.
"Call who?" she asked as she sat up.
"Keith. I want to know if you're still married, and I want to know now. Serena is not an early riser. They have to still be in her room."
"They didn't answer the phone last night."
"Do you want me to call?"
"No," she said. "I'll do it."
"Now," he said with determination. "I need to know if you're free, Maggie. And so do you. We're good together. I think we could be great together if you'd give us the chance to find out."
She was so tempted to say yes, to have the ultimate adventure, the fantasy of her life. Who would blame her? No one. Everyone wanted her to be happy. But how could she be happy with Jeremy, when he knew nothing about her? At least none of the important things, like Roxy, Dylan and Mary Bea.
Maggie reached for the phone and called the operator, asking for Serena's room. She wished they would give her the room number. She would have liked to knock on the
door and stare Keith right in the face.
The phone rang once, then twice, then three times. A man answered. "Hello," he grumbled.
Maggie's heart skipped a beat. "Keith? Oh, my God, is that you?"
"What?" He sounded confused, then alarmed. "Who is this?"
"It's your wife."
"I don't have a wife. You must have the wrong number."
"But--" Maggie stared in disbelief as the dial tone rang in her ear. She turned to Jeremy. "He answered the phone."
"What did he say?”
"He said he didn't have a wife."
Jeremy stared at her for a long moment. "Are you sure it was him?"
"It sounded like him." She looked at the receiver still clenched in her hand. "He said I had the wrong number."
"That's it. Give me the phone."
Maggie handed him the receiver, and he dialed the operator once again. She watched him with worry and anticipation and fear. After a moment, he hung up.
"No answer."
They'd spooked Keith. Now he knew someone was on to him. "He's going to leave," Maggie said.
Jeremy nodded. "Get dressed, then meet me downstairs. I'll keep an eye out in the lobby. If they try to leave, I'll stop them." He stood up, then bent back down to kiss her. "Don't worry, Maggie. We'll find out the truth."
"He hates me," she whispered. "What did I do to make him hate me?"
"Maybe you should hate him. He's the one who left, who treated you abominably. Help me out here, Maggie. Get mad. Fight. That's the only way you'll get through this."
"You're right." She thrust her chin up in the air. "I'm not some wimp he can just walk out on without an explanation. I want him to answer to me, to tell me to my face why he faked his own death."
"What are you going to do then?"
"I'll probably kill him."
"That works for me."
* * *
Lisa tucked Mary Bea into her own bed just after one o'clock Tuesday afternoon. The little girl was exhausted, and Lisa hoped she would sleep for a few hours and give her body a chance to rest. Lisa had worried that Mary Bea was going home too soon, but the doctor had assured her that Mary Bea would recuperate just as fast, if not faster, at home. Lisa had a feeling that's what they told everyone these days, insurance being the way it was. But she forced herself to take the comments at face value.
Summer Reads Box Set, Books 4-6 Page 24