by Tamara Black
“Hey, ladies. Let me get your numbers,” Clarence said as we approached.
“Just keep walking,” I whispered to Gina.
Unfortunately, she was mesmerized by him for some dumb reason. I was pretty sure it was the fact he was in charge of his own corner and was making good bank. She stopped in front of him and smiled. I wanted to keep walking, but I decided to stop.
“Let me get your number, girl,” he said to Gina, who had a reputation for being an easy lay.
“I ain’t no girl,” she said, pressing her chest outward.
“Damn, those some big ole titties,” Clarence said then looked back into the SUV.
I glanced over and made eye contact with Snake. My heart skipped a beat. The sides of his head were shaved, giving him an intense look. As we stared at each other, Gina and Clarence continued talking.
TWO
Snake
When the two white bitches walked up to Clarence and started talking to him like it was nothing, I realized I had to get rid of him once and for all. If I didn’t, he might be the damn fool that led to my downfall. As he talked, I looked at the white girl who was quiet. She has some sense to her, I thought. And a damn nice body. She didn’t look away when we made eye contact, which told me a lot about her character.
“Go,” I said to Tony, my driver.
A lot of the boys made fun of me for hiring a white boy good fellas wanna be, but I didn’t care. Tony had my back no matter what because he owed me a few large favors. He put the SUV into gear and we pulled away. I tried to think of the best way to take care of Clarence without making a mess. If I wasn’t careful, his boys would always be on me looking for revenge.
“You ready for lunch?” Tony asked.
“Yeah. Let’s go downtown.”
“On our way. I know a good place.”
Fucking spaghetti again, I thought to myself without displaying any emotion. As an up and coming drug king in cold, hard Cleveland, I had to keep my feelings to myself. Weak niggas got cut down quick on the streets. And I was on my way to OG quickly, like a dope fiend after selling their food stamps for the month. All I had to do was be on guard for any problems – like Clarence.
“What you think of Clarence?” I asked Tony.
He looked over at me for a second then turned back to the road. “I don’t know. He’s aight, I guess.”
“You guess, huh? What you hear about him?”
“He ain’t from around here. He one of them Shaker Heights niggas.”
“Fuck,” I said. “Turn around.”
“What?”
“I gotta give some cash to the baby mama.”
“Fuck, man, you couldn’t remember that after we ate?”
“All you ever think about is food, son.” I laughed as I watched the scenery pass outside the passenger side window. It was tinted just enough to not piss off the cops too much.
“I don’t know why you don’t just mail that bitch the money.”
I glanced over at him and glared.
“I wanna see my boy, fool. Just drive, okay?”
He shut his mouth. Twenty minutes later, we were in a nice middle-class neighborhood on the west side of Cleveland. It wasn’t too rich, but it was better than the projects. Kalim, my son, was seven and a half years old. I didn’t get to see him as much as I wanted, but I knew for all her faults Tanika, his mother, was the best person to take care of him. She lived with my mother who helped.
Every week, I stopped by for an hour or two and left them with a couple thousand dollars for bills and anything else they needed. My moms said she hated that I was a drug dealer, but she took the money I dropped off while lecturing me at the same time. In her eyes, Tanika could do no wrong. She didn’t see she was a lying, cheating, slutty whore. Since she gave birth to my son, I had to take care of her.
What I never imagined was that her and my moms would get together and team up on me. As Tony pulled into the driveway of their three story house, I turned to him.
“Go get some food. I’ll text you to pick me up. Don’t go too far.”
“Thanks, Snake.”
I glared at him. After he looked away, I got out of the Escalade and headed to the front door of the house. The only good thing about the next few hours was that I was going to get to see my son. Kalim meant the world to me. He was the reason I was still slinging drugs. My stacks of paper reached to the fucking ceiling, but I wanted to get more for him so he’d never have to go through what I did growing up in the hood.
THREE
Charity
The Cadillac drove away as Clarence kept spitting his weak ass game. I gave Gina “the look” that meant let’s fucking go, but she was flirting with the corner boy. His big belly and round face was okay. It was his fucking attitude that made him such an asshole. He was just a low level grunt, a soldier, and he thought he had some kind of power.
“You ready, girl?” I asked, grabbing her arm. “I gotta get going.”
“Let me get that number,” Clarence said as he looked at Gina.
She gave him her real number. As he tapped into his phone with his fat, pudgy fingers, I tried to control my anger. The last thing I needed was some power hungry thug wanna be thinking I offended him in some way on the street. Gina smiled at him, pushing her breasts out like a fucking peacock showing off. Finally, she turned and took a few steps down the street.
“What the fuck you doing giving him your number?” I asked as soon as we were out of earshot.
“He’s got money.”
“So, you a ho now?”
“No, but I want to get mine.”
I shook my head from side to side. “You best be careful with that fool.”
“Whatever. What about you wanting Snake?”
“That’s just a fantasy, girl. I’d never let him do anything with me.”
“I bet you would,” she said.
“You want to stop in the park and smoke one? It’s been a long day.”
“Don’t think I don’t know you’re trying to change the subject, bitch, but yeah.”
We turned down the next side street and headed down East 32nd toward Sterling Park. In one corner, a tree and bushes offered enough cover to be able to smoke a joint or do anything else you didn’t want the cops to see. Everyone used it. The unwritten rules were simple. If someone was using it, you kept moving unless you knew them personally.
Luckily, when we pulled the metal fence back and headed to the spot, it was empty. Gina walked over to the tree and leaned against it. A moment later, she had pulled out a mini-vaporizer. The small chamber was already packed with some loud ass weed – that sour diesel supreme. After she took a hit, she passed the small, metal device to me.
I missed blunts, but the vaporizer was more discrete because it didn’t smell as bad as burning marijuana. The high was just as good if not better. As we smoked out, my worries flew away. They didn’t evaporate completely, but they were a little more manageable when floating above my head slightly. Out of sight, out of mind, I thought to myself then giggled.
“What so funny?” Gina asked.
“Nothing.”
“Well, speaking of men, why you still single?”
“Ain’t no men worth my time right now,” I said, then added, “Well, there’s one.”
“Who dat?”
I smiled, unable to hide my excitement. “You know.”
“Snake?”
“Mmmhmm. He’s so fine, but he’s a thug…”
“Who a thug?” Clarence asked as he walked around the bush and into the clearing.
Gina slipped the vaporizer back into her purse.
“Ah, you girls back here smoking. Let me hit off that real quick,” he said, reaching out with his grubby hand.
“Ain’t you supposed to be working?” I asked.
He stepped forward, stopping right in front of me.
“You best mind your own business, bitch. Back here talking about thugs and shit. Now give me a mother fucking hit.”
Gina handed him the vaporizer.
“What the hell is this shit?”
“It’s a vaporizer,” I said. “Everyone’s doing it now.”
“I ain’t never heard of some shit like this before.”
He turned it over with his hands as he studied it closely.
“Where you light this shit?” he asked.
Gina giggled. “Just take a hit off that end there.”
“Here?” She nodded.
After he took a hit, he exhaled almost immediately. Delight spread across his fat face as he took another long drag off the device, holding the vapor in for a few seconds before exhaling.
“Let me get a hit before it’s all gone,” Gina said, reaching out her hand.
He looked at it – then her – with disgust and amazement. “Excuse me? I’m not done. I think I have to confiscate this so you girls don’t get busted on my block.”
“This ain’t your block, Clarence. This is Snake’s block.”
I flinched as he raised his hand back a few inches. He was so fat and I was so fast I was able to step back.
“Let’s go, Gina. We can get a new vaporizer. We don’t want that shit after his lips been on it.”
“Bitch, you best watch your mouth,” he said, wobbling toward me.
“You best watch your weight,” I said.
Gina and I took off through the park and headed back to St. Clair to get to our apartment. I looked back every now and then to make sure Clarence wasn’t following us. The last thing I wanted was for him to follow us home or hook up with Gina. Living with her was already getting on my nerves. We’d only been roommates for seven months, but I was ready to leave her behind and get a place of my own.
After we got back to the house, I went straight to the kitchen to make a bowl of chocolate Cheerios, my comfort food. When I checked the refrigerator for milk, all I found was an empty jug. I took it out and slammed it onto the counter, hoping to get Gina’s attention. When she didn’t come into the kitchen to face my wrath, I grabbed it and headed back into the living room. She looked up at me from the couch.
“I can’t believe that fucker stole my vaporizer. Do you want to go get a new one with me?”
“No, what I’d like to do right now is eat a bowl of fucking Cheerios, but you drank all the fucking milk again and didn’t let me know so we could get some on the way home.”
“I forgot. I smoke pot. Chill out.”
I shook my head then stormed back into the kitchen to throw the plastic jug into the garbage can. When I walked back into the living room, Gina was packing the bowl of a small, metal pipe.
“You getting high again? Why don’t you come to the store with me? It’s getting dark outside.”
“I don’t wanna go,” she said.
She lit the bowl and took a hit. I stared at her a moment, hoping she’d change her mind. When she settled back into the couch as if it was swallowing her completely, I turned and walked out of the house. A small grocery was still in business six blocks away. They had cheaper milk. On the other hand, I could go down a block to the gas station, but the milk would be almost twice as expensive.
Broke as fuck as usual, I headed toward the Food Mart for the cheaper milk. Two blocks away from my house, I had a bad feeling. King Chip’s new tune Walking Home ran through my head as I looked up and down the street for anything suspicious. Even though I didn’t see anyone, someone was watching me. I had a sixth sense when it came to danger in the hood. My spidey senses were tingling.
Clarence appeared out of nowhere. His big, fat belly shook as he laughed while two other scrub gang bangers crossed the street and blocked my path. I stopped, trying to stay calm so I could figure out what the fuck I could do to get away. None of them had shown a weapon, but I was sure at least one of them was packing. Their eyes roamed over my body as I turned with my back to a fence.
FOUR
Snake
“Mama, why you always gotta be putting me down?” I sat down next to her on the couch and put my arm around her back and rested my hand on her shoulder. “If what I’m doing is so bad, why you take the money from me?”
“You know I can’t work, young man. If your father was around, he would…”
“He would what?” I interrupted. “I’m old enough to take care of him now.”
Memories of the drunk man who’d hit my moms and me flashed through my mind, making my blood boil. He had a lot of karma coming back to haunt him. And if I could help in anyway, I was down. I just had to make sure my moms didn’t find out. My pops was an alcoholic dick, but she loved him with all her heart and thought he would return to her. She wouldn’t listen to the truth.
“Will you two keep it down?” Tanika asked.
I turned my head and saw her standing at the end of the hallway that led to the bedroom and bathroom on the first floor. She looked hot as fuck, but she was a fucking black widow. If I slept with her again or even let her suck on my cock, she would kill me. I was sure of it. When it came to life in the hood, I had a sixth sense. It was one of the reasons I’d been able to rise through the ranks so quickly.
As it stood, I was moving almost a hundred bricks each and every month. Even after paying my crew a very nice salary and bonuses for not fucking up, I’d accumulated over three million dollars in cash. I’d have to find a way to launder it eventually, but all I cared about at the moment was making enough so that my son had a better life than the one I’d had growing up on Cleveland’s east side.
“Can you leave so I can talk to my moms?” I glared at her.
“Who that white girl you was talking to today?” she asked, right hand on her hip.
I cocked my head to the side in confusion. “Who?”
“When you was talking to Clarence. He said you was flirting with that young white girl that stay…”
“Clarence need to learn to shut his fucking mouth,” I said, lifting my arm up before I stood.
My mother’s hand slapped the side of my leg. “Don’t you talk that way in this house, young man!”
I stepped back, out of her reach. At twenty-eight years old, I was way too fucking old to be hit by anyone, even my moms. Without saying a word, I pulled an envelope full of crisp, one hundred dollar bills out of my back pocket and held it out toward her. She reached for it. Before she could grab the money, I pulled the envelope back. Anger flashed over her face for second.
When I handed the week’s payment to her, she sat back and actually opened the envelope to start counting it. Tanika rushed back into the room, slid past me, and sat down on the couch next to her to get her cut. I stood there, looking down at both of them. They called me a piece of shit and said I wasn’t good enough for my son, but they were both greedy and liked the return on the work I put in.
“And if I want to date a young white woman for a change, ain’t nothing either of you can say to me,” I said.
They both looked up from the money, momentarily broke out of their hypnotic trance. The hate coming from them killed the idea of love for me. Even if I was attracted to a white woman, she would probably just use me for my drugs or money like every other person in my life. The closer I got to becoming king of the streets, the fewer friends I had around me. It was the nature of the game. The streets were a harsh mistress.
“You need to get your life in order and fight to get your wifey back,” my moms said, wagging her finger at me.
“Where Kalim at? I want to spend some time with my son.”
“He’s in his room,” Tanika said, still counting her share of the money.
I left the living room and walked down the hallway to the bedroom on the first floor. I’d told them more than once to move my son to the second floor, but they didn’t listen to anything I said. To them, I was just a drug dealer, a gangster. They loved the money I brought them to take care of my son. Beyond that, they only had contempt and disgust for me. If they weren’t family, they wouldn’t be in my life.
When I reached my boy’s room, I stopped in the doorway a
nd stared at him for a minute. He was tearing it up on some video game. I wasn’t sure about his mother letting him play Grand Theft Auto III at his age, but I didn’t say anything. The avatar on the screen punched a guy then got into a classic yellow muscle car. As soon as he tried to drive away, he was surrounding by cops.
“Fuck,” he said.
“Hey now, little man. Watch that language.”
He pressed pause and turned around. His face lit up when he saw me. After jumping up, he rushed over and threw his arms around me. I really wished I had more time to spend with him.
“How you doing, dad?”
“I’m okay. How you been?”
“Good.”
“How’s school going?”
“Good.”
“Don’t lie to me, little man,” I said, putting my hand on his head.
“I’m not. It just seems like a waste to me, you know. I wanna be a gangster.”
I sighed. “No. You don’t. Trust me.”
“But mama says you…”
“I don’t care,” I interrupted.
“Well, Imma get back to my game.”
“Aight, little man. Imma leave, but you call me, okay?”
“Aight.”
I turned and headed back to the door to leave.
“Hey, dad,” he called.
I stopped and twisted to look at him. “Yeah?”
“I love you.”
“I love you too, little man,” I said with a slight nod of my head.
On the way out of his room, I smiled. My son was more important to me than anything else in my life. He was why I was on my grind six days a week. The paper was stacking quickly, but I could always use a little more just in case something bad happened. Expenses were crazy once you started dealing with dozens of bricks per month. I employed fifty five people for one task or another.
I kissed my moms on the forehead and gave her a hug. Tanika looked at me as if she wanted me to do the same to her, but I just glared at the whore. I never put her down in front of my boy, but she was not a good woman in any way, shape or form. After I closed the front door behind me, I took a deep breath. Fuck. I forgot to call my ride. Just then, the Escalade pulled up.