by Tamara Black
“I have to go. I’ll email you. Thanks for having me over.”
I turned and walked toward her front door. She stood in the doorway and watched me get into my car. As I sat behind the driver’s seat and looked at her hot body, I wondered what the fuck I was thinking by coming over to talk to her. The book she was writing was okay, but it didn’t feel right to be helping her when it was so obvious she was flirting with me. She isn’t, is she?
She blew me a kiss as I drove away with a wave. Yeah, she was flirting. Why the fuck couldn’t this have happened before I got Serena pregnant? I loved my wife and my new wife, but as a writer I often thought about alternative scenarios. Most women – Serena included – found it irritating, but I couldn’t help myself.
The drive back to our apartment was a short one. Well, it would have been if I took the most direct route. Instead, I headed toward Lake Shore Drive. It was well out of my way, but I loved the way I could see Michigan Lake as I drove with the city’s beautiful skyline on the other side. As I drove, I thought about Carman and Serena.
With Carmen, my thoughts all centered on lust, wanting to go to bed with her, letting her please me as a man. And while that sounded exciting and a lot of fun, I truly cared about Serena and Edmund. They were my family and all that should matter in my life. My mind went back and forth, actually weighing the pros and cons of sleeping with the mother of one of my students.
Carmen’s erotic romance novel was horrible in my opinion, but with the way sales of my books were going, I could be completely wrong. If I helped get her book published, she would be ever thankful to me. Lots of writers and artists had a mistress as well as a wife.
As I justified cheating in my mind, I headed back toward our apartment, unsure of whether or not I would tell her about what was happening. Lack of communication had really hurt us in the past, and I didn’t want to make the same mistake. On the other hand, Carmen was hot and wanted me.
When I parked and went inside, I still wasn’t sure if I would tell Serena about Carmen or not. I was leaning toward not telling her, but memories of miscommunication hurting us gave me good reason to just be honest with her. Nothing happened between us yet. I should tell her.
TWENTY-FIVE
Serena
When Luke walked into the apartment, he looked deep in thought. I laid into him almost immediately.
“Where the hell have you been? This baby is driving me crazy. I need some help. He’s your son too, you know. What the fuck, Luke?”
I put my hands on my hips and stared at him. He wouldn’t make eye contact.
“Where have you been, Luke? I need your help.”
“I was, uh, helping a student’s parent.”
“What? Why? Did they pay you? Would you rather spend your time with strangers over your own family?”
“Enough!” he shouted.
A moment later, Edmund cried out. I rushed over and picked him up, holding him close to my chest as he continued crying.
“Look what you’ve done,” I snapped.
“I can’t deal with this right now, okay?”
“Deal with what, Luke? Your family? You should have thought about that before you got me pregnant.”
“I didn’t mean to get you pregnant. You know that, Serena.”
As soon as the words left his mouth, I didn’t want to talk to him anymore.
“You need to leave now, okay?”
“What? Why?”
“I need time alone.”
“Weren’t you just complaining about taking care of the baby?”
“Here,” I said, handing him Edmund, who was still crying.
I watched as Luke held him close. Gradually, Edmund settled down and stopped crying. As he sat down on the couch with him, I walked into the bathroom and shut the door behind me. A warm and relaxing bath was one of the few luxuries I had in life. Why can’t Luke understand that? The tub filled. I looked at my reflection in the mirror, not recognizing the woman who stared back at me.
Once the water was just right, I settled into the tub. The three candles I’d lit cast the perfect amount of light. I tried to concentrate on my breathing and relax, but my mind started working overtime as I thought about everything and nothing at the same time. My biggest worry in life was providing for Edmund. Luke was definitely second on the list.
The warm, sudsy water soothed me slightly. Before it turned too cold, I climbed out of the tub. I grabbed a clean towel and dried off, once again looking at my reflection in the mirror. My nipple had finally started to heal. Using the pump on it a couple times a day really helped relieve some of the pressure. I couldn’t wait for Edmund to stop breast feeding.
I put on my robe with nothing on underneath it after I was completely dry. When I walked into the living room, I saw Edmund in his crib asleep. The door to the spare room where Luke worked was slightly open. Is he watching porn or something? I wondered as I crept across the room as silently as I could manage.
At the door, I stopped and listened for a moment, expecting to hear moans and groans, but there was no sound coming out of the room – not even typing. What the hell is he doing? I debated whether or not to walk in on him for a moment until I remembered how much miscommunication had hurt our relationship in the past. I need to talk to him…
The door creaked as it slid open. Luke, sitting at his desk reading something on his laptop, whipped around when he heard the sound. When he saw me, he stood up and closed the laptop with his other hand. I hadn’t seen anything pornographic on the screen. It had looked like words. What is he hiding from me?
“Hey, you,” I said as I stopped in front of him.
My robe wasn’t tied completely, giving him a view of my curves. He looked from them up to my eyes.
“Hey, I was just reading a story.” He put his arms around my waist then added, “For school.”
I nodded my head. “Sure you were. I thought you were in here watching a porn video.”
He pulled me closer. “What? Why would I do that when I have a beautiful wife like you?”
He got the hint. I smiled, turned on at the thought of sleeping with my husband. We hadn’t had a normal sex life since I’d gotten pregnant with Edmund. Part of me wondered if we would get along better if we could restore the amazing sex life we’d had before the accidental pregnancy. I leaned in and kissed him passionately on the lips.
“Wow, you’re hard already,” I said as I reached down and grabbed him through his sweat pants.
“Yeah, you’re practically naked.”
“I don’t know. Maybe you were watching a porn,” I teased.
We kissed again.
“Let’s go to the bedroom,” he said.
He led me through the living room to our bedroom. With the door open so we could hear Edmund, we both stripped out of our clothes in front of each other. His body still turned me on. Does he still like my body? When he moved forward and kissed me, I was slightly reassured. When he kissed my neck and moved lower to my chest, I pulled back.
“Can we leave my breasts out of it this time?”
“I’m sorry. I totally forgot.”
“It’s okay. Lay down.”
After he laid on the bed, I climbed over him, straddling his body. We made eye contact as I rubbed against his cock. When it was hard, I grabbed it at the base and lifted myself up a little. Slowly, I moved back down. He penetrated me inch by delicious inch as we stared at each other. While I wanted to press my body against his, my nipples weren’t ready.
I looked into his eyes again. He had a look of lust on his face, something I hadn’t seen in quite a while. As I moved up and down, feeling him slide in and out of me, I remembered the first time we’d made love. It seemed like such a long time ago. Each time I lowered my body, he thrust upward as he held onto my hips. Our timing was perfect, resulting in a pleasing rhythm.
The friction built up as he penetrated me over and over again. I never wanted it to end. Pleasure washed over my body as I placed my palms on his chest a
nd rode him as if I really loved him. After Edmund, who needed me more, Luke was the most important person in my life. In the heat of the moment he reached up to grab one of my breasts, causing me to pull back.
“I’m sorry, I forgot,” he said awkwardly.
“It’s okay,” I moaned. “Let’s keep going. I’m so close.”
“Me too…”
I came first, arching my back and trying not to scream. Soon after, Luke grunted. After he finished, I carefully climbed off of him and laid down on the bed.
“I miss that,” I said after a moment of silence as we both enjoyed the afterglow.
“Me too…”
“I’m so tired.”
TWENTY-SIX
Luke
As we laid in bed next to each other, I kept thinking that I needed to speak up and tell her about what had happened with Carmen. While I hadn’t done anything with the woman, she’d definitely been flirting with me. Serena didn’t even know about the erotic romance novel or hers that I had on my laptop. I’d been reading it when she walked in and caught me with a boner.
“Hun, I need to tell you something…” I said, unable to wait any longer.
She didn’t respond. When I rolled to my side and looked at her, I saw she was asleep. Her face looked so peaceful. I wondered if I should wake her or not. If I waited, I would be less likely to tell her. With a deep sigh, I reached out and ran my hand over her cheek.
“Hey baby, I need to tell you something.”
Her eyes opened and she looked at me with a face that made me regret waking her. My timing was horrible, but she was awake and I had to plunge forward and hope for the best.
“What?” she asked quietly.
“I have to tell you something.”
“I love you too. Can I sleep now?”
“This is important, baby. Please.”
She sighed and rolled on her side. “What?”
“When you walked in earlier, I was reading a story.”
“I know. That’s what you said before.”
“What I didn’t tell you is that it was from the mother of one of the students I teach.”
“So? Does she want you to help for free or something?”
“Kinda. I don’t know how to put this…”
“Will you just spit it out, so I can go to sleep, please?”
“It was an erotic story,” I blurted out. “And she came onto me.”
Her eyes looked deep into mine, searching for answers. “She did, huh?”
“Yeah, but I didn’t do anything. I mean, I left right away.”
“So why are you telling me?”
“I’m just trying to communicate better and not keep things from you. The hard-on you caught me with was from reading her novel.”
“Are you kidding me?” she yelled, sitting up in bed.
“Shhh!” I hissed, but it was too late.
Edmund cried, breaking the calm.
“I got it,” I said, climbing out of bed.
After throwing on some boxers, I headed into the living room to check on him. He settled down as soon as I cradled him in my arms. A few moments later, he was asleep again. Unfortunately, so was Serena when I made it back into the bedroom. Will she even remember what I told her? I wondered as I carefully crawled into bed next to her. She rolled over with her back facing me.
Sleep came slower for me. I rolled around, trying to get comfortable, but I couldn’t fall asleep. I got up and headed to the spare bedroom to try to write down some of my thoughts. When I lifted the screen on the laptop, I immediately closed and deleted Carmen’s erotic novel. A copy was still attached to an email message in my inbox, but I could get rid of that later.
I just wanted to make sure Serena didn’t find a local copy if she snooped around my laptop. Part of me wanted to read the rest of it, but it was pretty bad writing. It was sexually charged, but I found myself editing it as I read, which I didn’t find fun. I tried to write a few paragraphs of a project I’d been meaning to start for a while, but the words wouldn’t come out of me.
TWENTY-SEVEN
Serena
When I woke up in the morning, Luke was asleep next to me. I vaguely remembered him crawling into bed an hour or two earlier after he was up all night. I bet he was reading that sex book from the student’s mother, I thought as I stared at him while he slept. Instead of waking him up, I got out of bed and went to check on Edmund.
He wasn’t awake yet either, so I went into the kitchen to make some coffee. Before starting up the coffee machine, I stopped and got my phone to call Gina. Luke would probably sleep half the day away, which would give me a little time to get out of the house. As the phone rang and I waited, part of me hoped she wouldn’t answer.
“Hello, this is Gina,” she said, perky as ever.
“Hey, Gina. It’s Serena. How you doing.”
“Not bad. Yourself?”
“I’m okay. I was wondering if you wanted to go get some breakfast. It really helped to be able to talk to you the other day, and…”
“Did something happen?” she asked.
How does she know?
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe. I think it’s probably nothing, but I want to get your opinion because you’re an open woman.”
“Sure thing. I’ll come over now.”
“Great. Luke is still asleep, so we’ll need to be quiet, but we can talk in the kitchen.”
“See you soon.”
After we disconnected the call, I wondered how she was able to be happy all the time. I fed Edmund a bottle while I waited for her to show up. Gina may have been attracted to me, but I didn’t feel a need to dress up around her. I was burping the baby when she quietly knocked on the door. When I opened it, she smiled and walked inside.
I carried Edmund with me into the kitchen. She fawned over him for a moment, making ridiculous baby noises while I smiled politely. I really need to get some new friends, I thought. When she was finally done talking to Edmund, I excused myself to put him back in his crib so he could sleep a little longer.
“He’s growing so quickly,” she said as I sat back down at the kitchen table.
I took a deep breath. “Tell me about it. You want some coffee?”
“No, thanks. I can’t stay long, but it sounded important, so I came over.”
“Aww, thank you. I’m sure it’s really nothing, but Luke told me a mother of one of his students was hitting on him and trying to get him to help her with a sexy romance book.”
Gina nodded her head, carefully weighing each of my words before she said, “On the bright side, he told you about it. If he was planning on cheating, he probably wouldn’t have told you.”
“Yeah, I thought about that this morning before I called you, but I wasn’t sure if I was just making excuses for him. I really do love him.”
“Sounds like you need a night out, girlfriend.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not sure about that…”
“Come on, it’ll be fun. Christina and I are going to a new club tonight. Why don’t you come with us?”
“I wouldn’t want to be a third wheel?”
“Why not? They’re the best kind.” She smiled. “The ménage offer is still open.”
“Oh, yeah? Which one? You, Luke and me?”
“That…” She paused, her tongue poking out from between her lips for a second. “Or you could join Christina and me to see if you’re more compatible with women.”
“I like men,” I said a little too quickly and loudly.
Gina smiled. “Sure, but you never know what you’ll like until you try it. Why don’t you just come out with us tonight? You deserve some girl time. If nothing else, we’ll just have a few drinks and dance. No pressure.”
“It would be nice to have a drink or two and take a break from the baby.”
“Luke works from home. He can watch Edmund, right?”
My head bobbed up and down. “Yeah. I deserve a girls’ night.”
The more I thought about the ide
a, the more I liked it. Be the time Gina left about ten minutes after she arrived, I was determined to go out with her and Christina. After what Luke had told me the night before, I was sure he wouldn’t mind watching the baby so I could get out for a little bit. Then again, with as far apart as we’d grown, I wasn’t sure what he would say when I asked him.
When he woke up a little after noon, he walked into the living room like a zombie. He was never a morning person, so I didn’t bring up the babysitting until after he ate something and had a cup of coffee. Luckily, Edmund fell asleep. With him napping, it would be easier to convince Luke to watch him while I went out with Gina and Christina.
“Can you watch Edmund tonight?” I asked just as he was about to get up from the couch and return his coffee cup to the kitchen.
“Sure, what’s up?”
“Gina and Christina invited me out tonight, and I really want to go.”
He studied my face intently. “You really want to go, huh?”
“Well, not really, but I think it would be good for me. After last night…” I let my voice trail off.
“Okay. I’ll do it.”
He stood up and headed for the kitchen, obviously not wanting to get into an argument. I spent a good two hours putting on make-up and getting ready to go out. Luke looked at me more than once, but he didn’t say anything out loud until I was about to head out the door.
“Serena,” he called out.
I turned. “What?”
“You look beautiful. Have a great night.”
“I plan on it.”
I drove to Christina’s apartment, planning on letting one of them drive to the club so I could drink. When I arrived and knocked on the door, Gina answered. To my surprise, Christina wasn’t even home. Apparently, their relationship was on the rocks as well. I thought about leaving, but Gina was almost in tears and invited me inside.
“I’ll stay for a bit,” I said, walking into their living room.
“I’m such a mess. I never get like this…”
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you not smiling.”
A faint smile formed on her face, but it was quickly overpowered by pain and sadness, emotions that were all too familiar to me.