by C. C. Coburn
Carly thought it went much deeper than that, but she didn’t know Sarah well enough to say anything. During Adam’s massage yesterday, she’d hit an emotional trigger. She’d backed off, not wanting to cause him embarrassment. She’d hit trigger points before and ended up with grown men blubbering like babies about emotional pain they’d been carrying around for years. It was a satisfying part of her job to be able to bring forth these emotions, but she also knew that if you pressed them to bring them forward when they weren’t ready, you could drive them even deeper into denial.
Carly didn’t have any more time to ponder Adam and his strange behavior because the kitchen suddenly filled with the sound of Celeste and Maddy squealing their greetings to each other. Moments later, they had their heads together over the drawing pad. Daisy bounced in, greeted her grandmother and Carly, then headed out the back door, pulling on a warm jacket. “Come on, Molly!” she called. Molly lumbered to her feet and followed, her tail wagging uncertainly.
Several of the ranch dogs raced up to greet her, barking excitedly. “Shut up!” Daisy told them.
Carly grinned. The child was so no-nonsense.
Sarah had a tray of tea and crackers in her hands. “Daisy’s off to see what needs to be done on the ranch today,” she said. “And I’m taking this upstairs to our expectant mom. She’s having a bad time with morning sickness.”
“Oh, the poor thing. Please tell Megan I’d be happy to try some pressure-point massage to relieve the nausea.”
“That’s very kind of you, Carly. I’m sure she’d appreciate it. In the meantime, make yourself at home. The rest of my boys and their families usually come over for breakfast on Sundays, but the snow will probably prevent that. The roads in town are chaos.”
Sarah left the kitchen and Carly prepared coffee for herself and hot chocolate for the children. However, Alex and Jake were having so much fun in the snow, they had no interest in coming inside for breakfast.
Minutes later, Sasha flounced into the kitchen, complaining about her “mean old grandma,” and said it was way too early to be up on a weekend. Then she noticed the snow and raced outside, forgetting her jacket.
Carly was amused that even a child raised in the mountains could find so much joy in fresh snow.
“Morning.”
Carly spun around to see Cody, Luke and Megan’s fifteen-year-old son, wandering into the kitchen. He was rubbing his unruly mop of dark hair. “Not a morning person?” Carly said with a smile. “Would you like hot chocolate or coffee?”
“Coffee, please,” he said, and sank down onto one of the chairs.
“Look, Cody! I’m drawing a picture of you being all sleepy in the morning,” Celeste said, coming around the table to show him her drawing.
Cody grunted, then accepted the coffee Carly handed him. “Thanks,” he said. After taking several sips, he seemed to brighten up. He glanced outside and said, “It snowed,” and Carly didn’t miss the note of wonder in his voice, too.
“Adam said we can go sledding today,” Alex said, dashing inside. “Are we doing it here on the ranch?”
“We can,” Sasha answered him as she started toasting bagels. “But there’s a fantastic sledding hill in town. We’ll go after breakfast and meet up with our cousin Nick. Provided the roads are cleared by then.”
Daisy breezed back into the kitchen, bringing the cold with her. “Breakfast ready yet?” she asked, washing her hands. Molly rushed in behind her, glad to be out of the cold, and curled up on her bed.
Rolling her eyes at her sister’s request, Sasha flipped two bagel halves onto Daisy’s plate as she took a seat at the table.
Sarah came back into the kitchen, clapping her hands. “Wash up, kids, and then sit up,” she said. “Carly, Megan’s not well. Would you mind looking in on her?”
“Of course not,” Carly said and, after getting directions to Megan’s room, left the kitchen in search of her.
As she mounted the stairs and turned at the landing, she collided with Adam on his way down. She staggered backward, and lost her footing, but his strong arms caught her.
“Sorry!” they both said at once.
Carly looked up into Adam’s dark eyes and repeated her apology. “I wasn’t looking where I was going,” she said.
“And I was coming down too fast,” Adam said. He stood there, still gripping her arms.
Finally, Carly managed to say, “Your breakfast is ready and I have to go and check on Megan.”
Still he held her, staring into her eyes. “You can let go of me now, Adam,” she said. “I’m not going to fall.”
He released her suddenly and shook his head as if he’d been in a trance, then slowly descended the rest of the steps.
ADAM CURSED HIMSELF as he turned into the kitchen. What the hell was that about? He hadn’t been able to let go of Carly. Didn’t want to let go of Carly. He tried telling himself he was only checking to see if she’d regained her footing, but she’d done that almost before he’d reached out to catch her.
He thought he’d be safe from running into her in the bedroom wing of the house, but no. There she was on the stairs, going up to check on Megan.
He needed to get out of this house. Go stay somewhere else. Except that both Lily and little Sarah were teething, and Will and Matt had warned him he wouldn’t be getting much sleep at their houses. Jack was living in a tiny apartment in town that he’d taken over from Matt. The ranch hands had their own cabin out behind the stables, but there wasn’t any spare room and they liked to smoke—Adam detested it.
Since it was peak ski season in Spruce Lake, he couldn’t afford to rent an apartment short-term until his posting to the Spruce Lake fire department was over in a couple of weeks. Adam was stuck between the proverbial rock and a hard place.
He’d been contented in the apartment over the stables. He had his privacy when he needed it, ate a lot of his meals alone—the way he liked it. But now that he was in the house, there was no privacy. Certainly no quiet with his three nieces giggling and Cody stumbling around bumping into things because his body had grown so fast he wasn’t used to it yet. He knew how Cody felt. He’d grown fast, too, when he’d hit his teens. When he’d been just a little older than Cody, he’d…
Adam felt the bile rising in his throat and rushed out the front door into the cold, needing it to clear his head, settle his stomach.
He sat on the porch steps with his head in his hands and breathed in slowly, trying to imitate the deep, slow breaths Carly had told him to take. By the third breath, he was feeling better. Surprisingly better. But he didn’t want to go back inside the house. And he didn’t want to head over to the stables where he might run into Luke or one of the hands.
He decided to take a long walk, try to exorcise his demons. Wearing nothing more than jeans, boots, a warm shirt and a fleecy vest, he set out across the yard toward the lake and the mountains beyond.
CARLY FROWNED AS SHE watched Adam from the bedroom window that looked out over the back of the house. He was dressed far too scantily for the weather.
“Don’t worry about him,” Megan said, her gaze following Carly’s. “They’re all used to the cold.”
Carly tried to put Adam out of her mind as she went back to gently massaging Megan’s shoulders, feeling the other woman relax under her touch.
They were sitting on Megan’s bed. Carly had decided a shoulder rub would be the most soothing for Megan and it appeared she was right as Megan moaned softly in appreciation.
“I’m sorry you’re having a hard time with morning sickness, and that it’s still on so late in your pregnancy,” Carly said.
“You’ve never had it?” Megan asked.
“Fortunately, no. Were you sick with Cody, too?”
“Yes, but it seemed much worse. I was all alone in New York.
I didn’t have wonderful people bringing me tea and crackers. Or giving me back rubs.”
“Is Luke pleased about the baby?” Carly ventured to ask.
“He’s over the moon. It was as unplanned as Cody was, so we’ll have to make some decisions about permanent birth control when this one comes along.”
Carly laughed. “Five children! That’s quite a handful. You’re lucky to have Sarah to help you.”
“I am,” Megan agreed. “But you have four children and no one to help you. That must be difficult.”
Carly shrugged, then realized Megan couldn’t see her. “To tell you the truth, I’m used to it now.”
“I…I’m sorry about your husband…dying like that,” Megan said, and Carly could hear the compassion in her voice.
“Me, too,” Carly said a little too harshly. Lately she’d felt not only the continuing grief, which had settled into a dull ache, but anger. Anger with Michael, for dying. And for leaving her so little to fall back on financially once she’d paid the bills.
“Do they miss him?”
“Yes. I have to be careful not to show my emotions when they start talking about him. They pick up on it and then they stop. I know that’s not good for them.”
“The financial and emotional strain of raising four kids alone must be very stressful,” Megan said. “I feel like I should be giving you a relaxing massage.”
Carly smiled. “I actually find that massaging others, particularly when it has such good results, calms me.” She finished rubbing her fingers in circles beneath Megan’s ears. “How are you feeling now? Ready to face the world?”
Megan stretched and turned to face Carly. “Strangely enough, I’m starving. And I haven’t felt that way in a very long time.”
Carly laughed. “I’m sure Sarah’s made something delicious. Shall we go?”
Carly stood, but Megan took her hand. “Thank you, Carly. Thank you for the massage and for coming to live here with your wonderful children. I hope we can become good friends.”
Carly was struck by the yearning in Megan’s eyes. Surely Megan had lots of friends? She seemed close to Becky and Beth, Will’s and Matt’s wives.
Perhaps Megan was responding to the protective shell Carly had put around herself these past two years.
She’d tended to keep to herself as an act of self-preservation. Initially, it had been because she was so busy raising her children alone. But once she sensed that Jerry Ryan wanted to be more than just her friend, she’d realized that the only way to escape him was to move out of state. After that, Carly had been so focused on getting her children settled, she hadn’t had the time or inclination to make friends, to let anyone new into her life.
“Carly?”
Carly snapped out of her reverie. “I’m sorry, I was miles away.” She squeezed Megan’s hands. “I’d like it very much if we could be friends.”
Megan’s face lit up and she hugged Carly. Carly hugged her back, grateful for Megan’s warmth.
By the time the two of them got downstairs, the kitchen was deserted…except for Adam. And Charlie, sitting in the high chair beside him, chewing on a piece of bagel. Molly was fast asleep, snoring way too loudly.
“Where is everyone?” Carly asked, going over to Charlie and lifting him from his chair.
“I told them if they cleaned up the kitchen, I’d take them sledding in the town park. So they cleaned it up and now they’ve gone to get dressed,” Adam said.
“That’s very kind of you.” Carly was surprised by his generosity in spending a day with a bunch of rowdy children. It seemed out of character for him.
He grunted in reply and said, “Mom told me I owe my nieces some quality time.”
“Then I’ll keep my kids here so you can spend time alone with them.”
Adam got to his feet, took his plate and coffee cup to the sink, rinsed them and set them in the dishwasher. Closing the door, he looked back at her. “It’s no trouble. We’re meeting up with Will and Nick.”
Carly took that to mean she wasn’t invited, which was fine. She was going to work through the lists of names Sarah and Megan had given her of people who wanted to book massages. The sooner she got her business up and running again, the better. “I’ll go hurry my kids along, then,” she said.
“No need.” Adam indicated her children stomping down the path he’d shoveled earlier, occasionally kicking snow at one another.
This was accompanied by the sound of Luke’s girls clattering down the stairs.
Soon the kitchen was filled with noisy children. Carly saw Molly raise her head in protest. She shushed the children, then herded them out into the living room.
Luke’s girls grabbed coats, scarves and mittens, asked Alex, Jake and Maddy if they needed anything else and then they all raced out the front door, shouting their goodbyes.
“Be careful!” Carly called after them, not that anyone heard her.
“They’ll be fine,” Adam said, coming up behind her with several plastic sleds slung over his shoulder.
“I’m sure they will,” Carly said, and shrugged. “Can’t help being the anxious mom when my children try a new activity. Thank you for including them.”
Adam grunted and he went out the door. Then he turned back to her, almost bumping into Carly, who’d started to follow him. “We won’t be back for lunch. Will likes to take the kids to Rusty’s for burgers.”
“All…right,” Carly said slowly. “I’ll get my wallet.”
Adam stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. The sensation of his touch was pleasant and unexpected. “It’s our treat,” he said. “Enjoy your day.”
Without a further word, he strode to a big SUV, checked that all the children were belted in and drove off.
Carly hugged herself to ward off the winter chill and watched until they were out of sight. She’d been startled but deeply moved by his kind gesture. Underneath his gruff exterior, she suspected Adam had a heart of gold. But at the moment, it was a heart full of hurt.
One of these days, I’m going to find out what’s really bothering you, Adam O’Malley, she vowed, and went back into the house.
Chapter Six
By the time the children returned later that afternoon, Carly had set up nearly three dozen appointments for the coming week. Several of her regulars had managed to track her down at the ranch, as well, and booked treatments.
Carly savored a warm glow of satisfaction. She was going to get back on her feet, and she’d be able to pay rent on the apartment above the stables until she could find somewhere else to live.
But when she mentioned paying rent to Sarah, the older woman had told her she’d do no such thing.
Carly was out in the yard, one foot resting on a corral beam as she watched Luke working with one of his horses, when Adam’s vehicle pulled up. Luke was training Cody to manage the horses and his son was doing a fine job. They both looked up and waved at her; smiling, she waved back. Thinking about the past forty-eight hours, Carly was almost thankful the fire had occurred. If it hadn’t, she would never have met these wonderful people.
Then guilt filled her as she thought of the Polinskis and all the other residents who’d lost everything they owned in the fire. At least the Polinskis were safe. Mr. Polinski had suffered severe smoke inhalation and would be spending some days in the hospital. Mrs. Polinski wasn’t so bad, and as the hospital had residences attached to it for the use of patients’ relatives, she’d be moving in there until their son came from Miami to get them. Carly had wondered why the elderly couple lived in such a run-down apartment when both had told her on several occasions how successful their son was. Why hadn’t he provided for his parents?
She smiled again as she caught sight of Molly with the ranch dogs. They seemed to have accepted her in all h
er oddness, since the too-short legs on too-long a body meant she couldn’t keep up with them when they raced around, but at least she had sense enough to keep away from the horses’ hooves.
The sound of the children piling excitedly out of the SUV distracted her from her thoughts. She turned away from the corral and went to ask if they’d enjoyed themselves. Only Carly didn’t need to ask because they all talked over one another. Will and Becky’s son, Nick, was with them.
He greeted Carly politely, then got swept up with the other children as they raced toward the house, calling, “Grandma!” Adam and Carly were left standing alone beside the vehicle.
He reached in the back to grab the sleds and hooked their straps over his shoulder. Carly saw him wince.
“You shouldn’t be lugging anything while your back is sore,” she said.
“Are you going to nag me about this?” he challenged.
“Yes,” she said, putting her hands on her hips. “And I’ll bet you’ve done even more damage to your back, because you dragged the sleds up the hill with Maddy and Celeste on them—didn’t you?”
“How’d you guess?” he said, unshouldering the straps and resting the sleds against the car.
“Because although I’ve known you for less than two days, I can tell that you go out of your way for others. Even to your detriment. Especially to your detriment,” she said, wondering again why this very repressed man tried so hard to hide his compassion for others. “How about coming over to the apartment and letting me work on your back?”
She noticed something flaring in his eyes. Interest in her suggestion? A yearning to have the pain in his back eased? But instead he shook his head. “I’ll take some painkillers. They’ll fix it.”
“You can’t live on painkillers! Stop being so stubborn and let me massage you.”