by Lass Small
Ellen said a nothing, “Mmm.” A response, not any opinion.
He grinned down at her lying on his arms and asked, “Not taken with Longhorn Cattle?”
“I had a steak—”
Indignantly, Tom interrupted, “You ate one? Don’t even say it! How could you?”
“—and someone told us it wasn’t actually longhorn meat, because you all didn’t let anybody kill a-one of them.”
Tom nodded as he said, “That’s a fact.”
The fragile, pale woman smiled.
He asked softly, “Want to go inside now? You’ve been out a while.”
She said, “All right.”
He not only carried her into the house, he asked, “Which way?”
She pointed to a guest room down a hallway on that floor.
Beyond, Mrs. Keeper and her cohort had scurried so as not to be seen. It was frustrating to them not to see what was happening!
As he carried Ellen, Tom offered, “Since I’ve already learned to carry you, would you like a review of the house? The layout is simple and—”
“This time, I’ll just go to my room.”
“Have I bored you?”
“Oh, no. I’m just tired.”
Not having let her go, he asked, “Along here?”
“Yes. The third door.”
He carried her to the door as he said, “I’ve got to be out and about, but I’ll be back for lunch and we’ll eat on the south side. Okay?”
She hesitated, then she said, “Okay.” But there was no enthusiasm.
His foot nudged her door open as she turned the knob and he carried her across the room and carefully laid her on the made bed. Well, he wasn’t cognizant about blankets—and she was dressed.
“Want to change?” He asked that watching her soberly. He smiled. “I could help?”
She lay quietly and barely shook her head as she watched him. She said a formal, “Thank you.”
“I’ll be back at noon.”
“Don’t bother. I’ll probably sleep.”
He grinned. “Too much good Texas air?”
She almost smiled as she said, “Yes.”
“I’ll check on you.” Then he didn’t leave. He watched her. He said yet again, “I’ll be back.”
A tear slid out of her eye.
He leaned over her and frowned. “What’s wrong.” A lead-in, not a question.
Her breaths became disorganized.
He was alarmed and said, “I can take care of anything that bothers you. Just tell me what’s wrong.”
“I was thinking of the baby I lost.” And big old tears slid from her eyes.
He sat down on the bed and lifted her onto his lap. He told her, “That’s tough. It makes you want to rail at God, doesn’t it? Go ahead. God won’t mind. You’ll eventually understand it all. That little kid might not have made it later, either. He might have—”
“—she.”
“—she might have gotten run over by a car or something awful like that And the kid just decided it wouldn’t be long enough, and you could have another.”
She asked, “How do you know?”
Her wet face was against his neck and her thin arms were around his body. He held her on his lap, sitting there on the bed. He replied, “My guardian angel explained it all to me just now.”
“I don’t believe it.”
“You’ve never talked to your guardian angel? Who do you quarrel with when you want to do something and the guardian shakes his head and says Nuhuh.”
There was silence. Then she said, “What did you want to do that the guardian said not to?”
“It’s too long a story to tell you, now. I’ll tell you the whole kaboodle another time. Why not lie here a while and snooze. I’ll wake you when I come back to lunch.”
“We’ll see.”
“Is it food or me you don’t like?”
“Food.”
“Well... We’ll let you watch me eat and you can go on starving.”
And again she said, “We’ll see.”
“Let me see your face. I can wipe tears away real easy.”
He leaned back and exposed her to the light. Her eyelashes were wet and her eyes were closed. She was too thin and very pale. His heart squeezed. “You’re a nuisance, do you know that? I’ve got all this work to do and here you are, lying on the bed and wanting atten—”
“I do not! You’ve been intrusive and bossy and obnoxious!”
He said, “Well, yes. You’re fragile and skinny and no threat at all so I could just go ahead and say what I wanted. Do you realize how seldom I get to say anything I want to?”
“Go nurse the lepers.”
“My grandmother said that! Who told it to you?”
“My grandmother.”
“Well, it’s one of those realities that you can’t knock down. It’s truth. There are always people who are worse off than us. And I think it’s real nasty to pull it out at a time of stress and wallop a perfectly upset person with such a comment.”
“Me, too.”
“You’d rather wallow in being unhappy.”
“Yes.”
He considered that with some elaborate thoughtfulness before he said, “I can see that. For a while. But the time comes when you ought to let the bad stuff go and look ahead. How long’s it been now?”
“Five months and two days.”
“Well, I can see you being upset the rest of that sixth month. Then I’ll expect you to straighten up.”
“Yes.”
“But you’ll have to begin eating again. You’re skin and bones.”
“I wanted to die, too.”
“Naw. You can’t do something like that. Nobody would understand and they’d all be irritated with you. You are strong and you—Hush! I’m talking—and you have to cope. It’s a real nuisance but that’s the way things work. You cope.”
“Damn.”
There on the bed, he held her on his lap and rocked gently. He commented, “If you get a quarter of the good stuff, you can’t complain. Lots of people have it worse than that. You’re killing yourself by not taking care of you. That’s dumb. No! Stop that! I’m giving you good advice that I’ve had. Straighten up and behave and quit feeling sorry for yourself. Let your lost baby go. Have another. Don’t compare them or think the first one would’a been perfect.”
With leaking tears, she had to shake her head and smile. She said, “You are so rough. I wonder if you’ve ever soothed a woman.”
“What the hell do you think I’m doing now? Here—hush—I’ve spent all this time straightening you out when I was supposed to go out and help a mare birth twins, and I’ve let that poor horse do it all by herself with only a dozen or so men with her, and I’ve given you all this valuable time to straighten you out! You’ve exhausted me. Move over and let me lie down, too. I’m worn to a nub!”
She shook her head and laughed through her tears. “You’re impossible.”
He said, “Since we’re in your bed and nobody’s around and I’m free, why don’t you smooth me down and make me feel better.”
She watched him carefully. She said, “Shame on you.”
He pried himself up and sighed very dramatically. “I did try.”
“Thank you.”
“I’ll see you at noon. Behave. I’ll be back.”
She responded, “Don’t threaten me.”
He tilted his head back and considered her. Then he said, “Not right away.” And he patted the top of her head. And he left.
Ellen stayed in her room where she was isolated. She lay quietly and didn’t think or anything. She didn’t even sleep. But she did glance at the clock.
She ordered her lunch to be brought to her room. The crew did that easily. Mrs. Keeper viewed the tray and added another flower to it. She smiled at the one who would deliver it and said, “Good.”
Probably the most irritating thing about Mrs. Keeper was that she knew people, she did research, she contacted old friends of theirs, and she learn
ed everything she needed to know in order to spoil one of her guests.
The tray delivered to Ellen was unusual. It had all sorts of goodies on it. Little samples. This and that. Who could resist?
Ellen was human. She did look over at the tray. She saw there was no napkin on it, so she also saw what was on the tray.
That was the sly way of Mrs. Keeper.
Ellen tasted this and that and ate more than she had in some long time. An apricot here, a kumquat there, a slice of banana, a square of a cut-up sandwich, which held lettuce and some mayonnaise. Lit tle bits and pieces of things. It was all alluring.
Wickedly so.
How was a woman to fade away in grief when someone brought a tray like that?
After noon, Tom came up to see Ellen. An empty tray was outside her door. Her door was not locked. He opened it softly saying, “You here?” But he did go inside her room. She was asleep. He considered her.
If it had been she who’d emptied the tray, it was their first victory. She needed some attention. He’d see to it that others hounded her with such care that she wouldn’t notice they were helping her.
He carried her tray back to the kitchen and bragged on the cooks for being so innovative. And he complained because he never got anything like that...as an appetizer! He talked to the kitchen crew and got all the various things he wanted to eat while he teased and complained that he was always ignored.
Knowing full well that Tom Keeper had his life...well, his food exactly as he wanted it, the crew only laughed at him... and with him. Tom was very humorous. He was especially so that day. How interesting.
Probably the most intriguing thing that Ellen found in that house was that the. Keeper cat jumped up on the porch railing and stretched out to ring the doorbell. That way the cat got attention right away and got inside without having to wait.
Dressed in a shirt and long trousers, Ellen was reading a book the next day and the doorbell rang. Mrs. Keeper called down, “It’s probably the cat, would you let him in?”
Ellen did go to the door and opened it but it was a woman her age. She was casually dressed. Her name was Lu Parsons and she was the sister of the throwback Andrew, but Lu lived in one of the ranch houses with the pilot Rip Morris.
Ellen smiled and said, “Come inside. I thought you were the cat.”
Lu blinked.
Ellen laughed softly and said, “I know. I wonder, too. But they’ve told me to answer the doorbell because it might be the cat They say that it reaches over from the railing and presses the doorbell. I just wonder if this is a joke they pull on guests.”
Lu grinned. “I’ll have to stay now just to see that.”
“I’d appreciate the backup. They are probably just giving us something to think about in this rather isolated place.”
Lu considered the idea and then agreed, “You’re more than likely right.”
Ellen moved slowly to a chair, indicated the other to Lu, and sat carefully.
“Are you all right? I’ve heard you were skinny as a rail, and you’re really elegant. Thin.” She considered thin, then she said, “You could use some padding. Have a caramel.”
Very sadly, Ellen told her guest, “I lost a baby.”
Lu knew that already. In their area, gossip hardly passed the original lips before everyone had heard it and knew all the details. But Lu didn’t say she’d heard that. She said, “I’m sorry.”
A great tear trembled on the bottoms of Ellen’s eyelashes.
Lu shook her head and told her companion, “Don’t you dare cry because I will too, and I get blotchy. What’s past is past. Look ahead.”
In halting words, Ellen said, “I’m not sure I know how to do that.”
“Look around and see all the other people who cope or need help.”
Ellen replied, “Right now, if I found someone else was grieving, I’d just cry more.”
Lu advised, “Go see Angela Becker. She has five kids and a very busy husband who is out and around and not available. She’s at her wit’s end. The kids are just one year apart. She’s going nuts. Why not go over and give her a fifteen-minute break?”
“Fifteen minutes?”
“It would be stark relief for Angela. She could catch her breath. Do it once in the middle of the morning and again in the middle of the afternoon. And, Ellen, do not get wishy-washy and stay longer. The fifteen minutes is all! Understand?”
“I’m...not sure...exactly how to deal with children. How old are they?”
Lu repeated, “Six months to age five.”
“My word!”
“I believe she responds to the phenomenon with that same kind of shock. If you do go, she could sit for fifteen minutes, without having to do anything or listen to anybody!”
Hesitantly, Ellen confessed with some caution, “I’m not very sturdy.”
“Neither is Angela.”
Slowly, Ellen rose from her chair and went to the window to look out at the other houses. “Which one is—Angela’s?”
Lu went over and pointed out the house. “Want to come along with me and see the house and kids? Then you could decide.”
“I’m not at all strong.”
“None of us is.”
Ellen asked, “Five children and the eldest is just—five?”
Lu nodded. She watched with great interest. How would the fragile woman respond?
Ellen said softly, “I’m not sure—I can handle—someone’s—children.”
Lu shrugged. “Kids are kids.”
Ellen lifted her watery eyes and said, “Yes. They are all precious.”
Lu grinned at the weepy woman as she said, “When they’re asleep?”
Ellen shook her head, trying to control herself.
“One of these days you’ll have to face the fact that there are—other children.”
“I know.”
In another few minutes, Ellen called to Mrs. Keeper who had to take big steps backward so that her voice reply wasn’t too close. She innocently asked, “Yes?”
Ellen called back in explanation, “Lu Parsons is taking me over to meet Angela Becker? We won’t be long.”
Mrs. Keeper called down, “Hello, Lu. How nice of you to call on us. Just see to it that Ellen takes it easy.”
Lu called back, “Sure.”
Ellen had no clue—at all—that it had all been carefully plotted by those two women.
The two young women got into Rip Morris’s car and drove the couple of blocks over to Angela’s house. Anyone else would have commented on having to use the car in that short distance, but the fragile Ellen accepted that the drive would be just that.
Angela Becker answered their knock almost before they managed it. She was rather in disarray and her hair was not tidy. She held one child under one arm. But she was calm and apparently delighted to have guests. She did not appear harassed.
Angela and Lu talked after Ellen had been introduced. As that was being done, a two-year-old came to them yelling bloody murder.
With some effort, Ellen picked that one up. With her lax muscles, the baby weighed a ton! She asked soothingly what could be wrong? And the baby didn’t squirm out of her hands or arms but babbled baby talk while he pointed.
Ellen carried the little one in the direction he’d pointed, so Ellen missed seeing the exchanged glances made by Angela and Lu who smiled. Angela lifted her eyebrows in pleased shock and stared at Lu.
Lu shrugged, looked at her watch and said in a whisper, “We’ll see. Hers was a little girl.”
“Ahhh.”
The little one in Angela’s arm wriggled free and was set down to the floor. She went to see where her little brother and the lady went. So Angela and Lu sat down in the stiff chairs that had been discarded to the entrance hall because nobody liked the chairs.
When fourteen minutes had passed, the two went to find their guest, Ellen. She was sitting on the floor with the children. She was listening to them. They all took turns talking. Ellen had insisted on that and pointed to who
was to speak.
The two-year-old spoke gibberish, which the older kids knew and interpreted the gibberish quite easily. The boy was too young with words to correct them.
Lu said, “We have to go.”
It was some pang for the two women to watch Ellen carefully rise from the floor. She smiled at the kids. They touched her knees and thighs and said, “Come back.” And the little boy said earnest things no adult understood. His fittler sister just watched.
The two women, Lu and Ellen, went out of the house, returning the calls of goodbye that they all said, and they went back to the car.
Since they were out, Lu took Ellen to show her Rip’s house where she was...uh...shacked up?
She laughed. And Ellen did smile. But Ellen was remembering how much she’d missed her lover when he’d abandoned her.
After their short view of Rip’s place, the two women went to the grocery store there that not only sold food but shared all the gossip. And the fact that the Keepers’ fragile guest was there awed them all. Lu took it in amused stride.
Mrs. Keeper had commanded Lu to take Ellen to the grocery store. Everyone would be so curious and they’d all find all sorts of excuses to come out to the house. Mrs. Keeper just did not have the time to give teas for all those people! Having the locals see Ellen at the grocery would soothe their curiosity.
It was just lucky that Lu Parsons’ brother and his new wife were on their honeymoon. The Keepers’ town thrived on gossip.
Three
Ellen was brought back to the Keeper house by Lu. It was obvious Ellen was just about at the end of her strength. It was Ciggie who was at the door first, and she simply took Ellen along to her room, helped her strip and put her naked into bed. She insisted the fragile one drink most of the water in the fresh glass. Ellen did. She handed the glass back to Ciggie. She was asleep in no time at all.
The fact that Ellen was so vulnerable shocked everybody. They’d really just thought she was skinny and grieving. They thought it was primarily attitude. They hadn’t realized how far down she’d gone physically.