by Ember Leigh
“But please, continue with the pot shots. Get it all out of your system. Maybe I deserve it, and if it makes you feel better or like you’ve somehow won against Josh Lambert, be my guest.”
He never broke eye contact with her, though his face had hardened slightly. Josh was used to the slander—with his career, it was part of the game—and she had to admit, he handled it well. He always had.
His honesty wasn’t helping her stay firm and cold. She didn’t want to hurt him, not that bad anyway. But he deserved a little crap, especially after what had happened to them. Their convoluted history made him overdue for a really hard time, in her opinion, so she was there to establish the balance.
But his voice rang between her ears. She’d detected the raw emotion in his words, and she paused before she said quietly, “I’m sorry.”
“Apology accepted.”
A tense silence fell between them, and Paige was torn. Part of her had reared up and started screaming, begging to get this man to herself so she could hear him out and kiss him all over. The other part of her was struggling to silence and suffocate the part considering giving him any semblance of a chance. Less than an hour in his presence, and her head was heavy from all the conflict inside.
The director of the program signaled for her attention and the On-Air sign lit up. The muted sounds of the opening music tinkled, and Paige looked at Josh one last time before she started. His eyes were already waiting for hers. A chill zipped through her.
“Good afternoon, New Yorkers. But not just New Yorkers, we’ve got Philadelphians, Detroiters, Minnesotans and more…”
Once the flow started, her whole body relaxed and her mind drifted elsewhere, to that suspended point of non-being she’d never experienced any other way. The radio gig had proven to be so fulfilling exactly for that reason—the meditative bliss of being live.
“Today’s guest is a slight departure from our pattern of up-and-coming women on the strong and independent career path. First of all, he’s male. Second of all, he’s no newcomer. And last of all, well…I’d say Josh Lambert has something of a female fan base, don’t you agree?”
Surprise registered itself on Josh’s face but he took the ball and ran with it. “How kind of you, Miss Alexander. Although I don’t think my fan base can compete with the amount of eligible bachelors knocking on your door.”
Paige’s cheeks reddened, but she was insanely glad to see their on-air rapport was just as light and friendly as it had been during the toughest times on the island. She sent silent thanks to him for being so good.
“Trust me, nobody’s knocking on my door. They can’t get past the elevator guy.”
She launched into a review of why Josh was being featured for the day’s segment and after a bit more witty banter, she got down to the questions.
“As I mentioned, you’re no newcomer. You have an impressive list of accomplishments in the industry, ranging from actor and talk show host to Director of Operations at one of the largest entertainment companies in the country. So I have to ask, why are you executing the one-eighty?”
“That’s a great question, Paige, and I’d love to get into that. As listeners of your show probably agree, success and fulfillment aren’t always wrapped up in the same package. While I was extremely successful—and hope to be once more as I start my next adventure—there came a moment in my career when I realized I wasn’t fulfilled by what I was doing. Sort of like, going through the motions without asking myself why.”
“I think that’s a very common complaint among professionals,” Paige said, her mind spinning. What a sneaky maneuver this had been on his part. Get her on air to laud and accept his story. How could she refuse hearing the whole story after this? This would have been his only way to accomplish such a thing…and for that reason alone, he must have pulled the strings. The revelation resonated through her like harmony.
“There was one transformative person who entered my life, totally unexpectedly. I credit her with providing me with the impetus to finally ask myself the why of what I was doing. She came along at just the right time. She was sort of like my unwitting guru.”
Paige chuckled, feeling her cheeks heat up, knowing exactly who he was referring to. “Unwitting guru? Did you have to pay her for her services then?”
“Fortunately not. If we had to put a price tag on the lesson she taught me, well…let’s just say, I’d be in debt for the rest of my life.”
“What did she do differently, in a way former influences hadn’t done for you?” The words strained to get past her lips.
“Well, she’s in the same industry as me, so she has a lot of the same experiences as me in a professional sense. Aside from being one of the toughest cookies I’ve ever met in my entire career, she had a work ethic coupled with morals.” Josh paused and then laughed. “Needless to say, that’s not always a given in the business either. She showed me that it’s possible to have a successful career that echoes decent values, while simultaneously allowing you to rise to the top of your game.”
Paige grew dizzy. She swallowed the emotions that rose to the surface and pressed onward. “You’re lucky then, to have found someone who could open your eyes like that. Now, tell our listeners more about what new venture you’re getting into and why…”
Josh explained his idea for a grassroots entertainment industry start-up, along with his vision for talent hunting and cultivation of groups designed to foster goal achievement among youth.
Paige sat entranced and enthralled by his words. The man was a businessman in the truest sense, with a keen eye for detail that blended savviness with social activism. She kept her face neutral as she listened, while on the inside she was fan-girling as she might have if Brad Pitt had shown up during her adolescence. Josh was full of ideas and precise action plans so titillating she might sign anything to see the dream realized.
When he was done with his explanation, Paige stifled the urge to applaud. He looked sheepish. “That’s impressive, Mr. Lambert. Highly impressive. Tell me, would this have happened if it weren’t for the recent development with your former company, IBC?”
“Certainly not.” He paused, then said, “True growth and change sometimes emerge only in times of crisis. To be fair, I could have stayed with IBC. The path of least resistance would have been to honor the contract and stay with them.
“But when faced with that option, I realized—with the help of this person I mentioned earlier—that it wasn’t what I wanted to do. Following the path of least resistance, the status quo, the habitual pattern, was no longer serving me. That revelation was big, and a difficult one to make. A costly one, for sure.”
“You say costly, and I assume you mention this in terms of the contract. I apologize if you’re unable to discuss particular aspects due to the litigation, but from what I understand you had to pay a very large sum of money to get out of the contract.”
“You’re right. I did.”
“Can we get a figure?”
“That I can’t reveal. But, I’ll give you an idea—I sold two cars and a house.”
Paige’s mouth fell open. “Is that East Coast market or West Coast?”
“West Coast,” he said, “Though I’m not sure which is worse—LA or New York.”
She laughed. “At any rate, the legal system can be a real tricky jungle, huh?”
“Sure can, but, like I said, these types of crises can be blessings in disguise. Turns out I didn’t need two cars—I only have one ass, anyway.”
She snickered. “Glad to see you’re remaining positive throughout what I can only imagine must be a very difficult process.”
“Difficult but not as bad as I’d imagined.”
Paige and Josh continued their interview with a lightness and ease that set a warm, bubbly contentment simmering in her belly. She loved talking to him—God, she couldn’t deny it. He was so easy to talk to, so quick with his thoughtful remarks and his good-natured on-air personality. Paige found herself beaming at him several ti
mes during the interview, and by the time they wrapped, she was resoundingly pleased by the dialogue.
The On-Air sign flipped off and her director gave her a thumbs up from beyond the glass of the studio.
“Well, Mr. Lambert,” Paige said, giving him a long side glance. “You passed.”
He grinned at her. “Back at ya, babe.”
Paige blushed at the unexpected use of the pet name. She cleared her throat and yanked her eyes off his face. “Thanks for the unexpected and somewhat unwanted interview. I think people are really gonna like it.”
“Same here. And thank you for dealing with my unexpected and totally unwanted presence. I appreciate it. I know how you feel about…all that.”
She busied herself in her laptop so she didn’t have to worry about looking at his face and betraying any emotions she’d prefer to keep private. “No problem.”
On the radio website, people were already weighing in on the show. There were a couple rave reviews—from So inspiring, I’ve been thinking of leaving my current career path for so long, and now I see that it can be done, to Great segment, the guy sounds hot—and the satisfaction made her dizzy.
“People liked it,” she said, eyes still glued to the screen. “They’re already giving feedback. Good job.”
Josh stood and stretched. Paige dreaded the fact that he’d be leaving, but was unsure how to get him to stay without revealing a crack in her emotions.
“I should be on my way,” he said, watching her.
“Yep.” She adjusted her skirt. “I’ll walk you out.”
They exited the sound studio and walked toward the elevator, Paige leading the way. There had to be some innocent excuse to meet up, something casual enough that wouldn’t betray the heart palpitations beneath her shirt. Maybe they could go out for a drink later, and have that conversation he’d mentioned about baring it all. Maybe go right to her apartment and smooth it all over with lips and kisses.
At the elevators, Paige pressed the call button and they stood in a tense silence.
Josh moved closer to her and her skin erupted into goose bumps. His hand appeared at the small of her back. “Can I see you again?”
She opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. She was sure he was gobbling up the indecision that had to be running rampant on her face.
“In a professional context, if you’d like.”
He took another step toward her, his hand still warm and heavy on the small of her back. “No funny business. Just…I’d kill for any chance to be near you, Paige. Even if it means all I can do is look at you.”
What could she say? She was desperate to be near him as well, and after their show she was more than intrigued to see what else this guy had circulating inside his head. She tried to conjure some of the anger from before, but it sputtered and failed to light. “I think it would be prudent for us to put our heads together on some projects.” Her voice came out barely a whisper, quiet enough to dodge the rifled security guards of her emotional fortress.
He grinned at her. “Can I have your phone number?” She creased a brow, and he added, “For planning, you know, so we can meet up sometime and talk about…whatever.”
“Yeah, sure. I—” The elevator doors opened. “I’ll ride down with you and give it to you.”
They entered the empty elevator car, and she pressed the button for the lobby. The doors slid shut. Her heart pounded as she recalled how the majority of their shared elevator rides ended up on the island. It looked like he was thinking the same thing. His eyes flashed and she cleared her throat, relaying the number.
He saved it to his phone and smiled. “Thanks, Paige. Thank you so much. For everything. But mostly just for agreeing to talk to me again.”
He squeezed her arm and passion erupted like fireworks inside her. She inhaled sharply and struggled to ignore the fire between her legs. Ignore this man and his face and his biceps and his cologne and his jaw line and every single word coming out of his mouth…
“I’m sorry if this is too forward, or too soon, but I’d like to ask if I could hug you. I know things ended poorly between us. Well, they ended abruptly. If anything, I’d like to have one last hug from you.”
She watched him, tempted to jump into his arms and kiss the shit out of his face. Her rational mind was making a quick exit stage left which is why it didn’t surprise her when she said, “Sure.”
The next second his arms were around her, she fell into his embrace, utterly consumed by his warmth and scent. She gasped, tentatively wrapping her arms around his neck, both shocked and relieved he had the nerve to attempt such a gesture.
He buried his face in her shoulder. She could barely breathe for fear of the moment ending. Her fingers found their way to the curve of his neck, the line of tiny hairs at his neckline, heart pounding so hard she was sure he’d be able to feel it through the hug.
The elevator slowed to a stop and Josh removed himself from their embrace. His face bore the mark of a thousand unspoken statements, and an idea sparked.
“Thank you.” He squeezed her arm. “I know I’ve said it a hundred times, but I’m sorry. Maybe someday you’ll want to hear why.”
The elevator doors slid open and he waited a moment, as though he’d somehow heard the slick thought that had crept up in her head. She forced the words out before she had a chance to second-guess herself. “Listen, Josh.” She looked past him at the doorman, who watched them curiously. “Did you know about the radio networking gig? It’s in a couple days.”
She was referring to the biannual evening event dedicated to pure schmoozing for the radio world. She and Gary were planning to go, with high hopes of getting their foot into multiple doors, having a fabulous time eating free hor d’oeuvres and critically commenting on the guests’ wardrobe choices. It might be an innocuous way to nudge the door open a bit for Josh. But just an inch.
“Yeah, I did. I was planning on going. Were you?”
She lifted a brow, catching his playful shift. Her heart raced as if nothing had ever changed between them. Their dynamic was tenacious and powerful. “I was. Would you like to join me and Gary?”
“Oh, a triple date? I’d be delighted. That’s an excellent idea, actually, because I was hoping to talk to you a bit more about the ideas I mentioned during the show.”
A man entered the lobby and approached the elevator. He slipped into the car with them and pressed the button to Paige’s floor. She and Josh shared an amused glance as the doors shut and they ascended.
“What did you have in mind?”
“Well, to be honest, I’d like to put my head together with you on some of these projects.” He bit his lip, watching her.
She let it sink in, trying to rationally assess things before responding. The immediate reaction had been complete and utter agreement. Parts of her begged to work with him, to get a man as motivated and creatively-driven as her on board with new projects. The familiar knee-jerk rejection appeared again, but this time, it was quieter, more easily ignored.
Josh had worked some magic with his stunt today, and it didn’t sting so bad to admit it to herself. Maybe that stunt was for the best. No matter how much she disliked being wrong.
The elevator doors slid open and the man walked out. Beyond, Gary passed by. He did a double take when he noticed them in the elevator together. His shock was the last thing Paige saw before the doors slid shut and the elevator descended.
“I’d like to put our heads together on some things.” The words came out light and free. It felt right.
A grin broke out on his face. “Are you serious?”
“Deadly so.” She cracked a small smile. “You’ve got some great ideas, and I’d love to see them through.”
He rocked back on his heels and whistled low. “You just made my day. And my week. I think you made my year, Paige.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because I never thought I’d be able to work with you again. My career felt less rich for it.”
The words bounced pleasantly between her ears and she bit back a smile. “Well, just remember, it’s professional.”
“Right. Completely.” He paused. “But, I mean, it doesn’t hurt that my new professional partner is the most gorgeous woman in the world, either. Or that I would do a large variety of things to prove to her that I’m very serious about explaining what happened and why she should take a chance on me.”
His words rocked her into a stunned silence. The elevator doors slid open again and the doorman looked more quizzical this time. Neither attempted to exit and Paige fought to keep rationality afloat.
The man’s body and his ideas were a deadly combination, one she’d been trying to ignore and otherwise deny since the day they’d met. A combination that the deepest part of her knew was perfectly, exquisitely, indisputably appropriate for a woman like her.
She’d agreed to a professional dimension for now. Anything more was too much, too soon. And maybe too ludicrous.
“I’m sorry,” Josh said. “I wasn’t trying to be greedy. I just…I’m really thankful for today. I’m looking forward to collaborating with you.” He offered a small smile, and Paige couldn’t get past the fact that he’d used the word ‘thankful’ in reference to himself. Something really had changed with this guy.
“I look forward to it as well,” she said, seeing both stars and question marks behind her eyes. “Meet me at my apartment on Friday at seven. So we can all go to the event together.”
He looked relieved, like maybe he’d been afraid his admission had rescinded the invitation. “I’ll see you then.” He squeezed her hand and exited the elevator, leaving Paige tingling everywhere with the word wait dangling on her lips.
Chapter Fourteen
Paige checked and then double-checked her clock when three knocks sounded on her front door days later. It was five-thirty. Both Josh and Gary were due at her house at seven, and she was one toe into her warm and prepped shower.
She waited to see if it would repeat itself. Maybe it was a misplaced knock. People didn’t call at her door unless they advised her beforehand or the doorman called up. This was odd. This was severely odd. The knock came again, louder this time.