“There were over a hundred people at that party. I can’t be expected to remember every conversation I had that evening.”
“You hurt my feelings, Nina. It’s not every day I invite an executive from the private sector to lecture my class. Have you already forgotten our discussion?”
“You didn’t mention that either, cherie,” Marc admonished.
“There’s a lot your wife doesn’t tell you,” Phillip quipped.
“The time I spend with my husband is very precious. I don’t bring up anything that doesn’t benefit our relationship.”
Nina turned to Geraldine for backup. “You understand. You’re a busy professional as well.”
Geraldine agreed.
By the time the main course was served, the atmosphere was much less tense, friendly even. Nina breathed a huge sigh of relief. It seemed they were through with minefields to navigate and traps she was afraid would spring—at least for the night. Marc discovered that Geraldine was conversational in French and she decided to practice her skills under the guidance of a fluent speaker. Phillip regaled them with tales of his travels and visions for the Dare to Dream Foundation.
“You, my dear, are an absolute genius in the kitchen,” Geraldine gushed. “Marc, your wife can do it all. I’m bursting with envy.”
“My Nina is a rare gem,” Marc said.
“You see why I married him?” Nina said to her guests.
That remark got a chuckle out of everyone, including Phillip.
“Geraldine, if you help me clear the dishes, I’ll tell you how to get that suit I wore on the cover of Executive Insider at a discount,” Nina offered.
Geraldine didn’t get a chance to respond. “I’ll help you clear the dishes,” Phillip offered.
Everyone looked at him like he had suddenly gone mad.
“That’s not necessary,” Nina said firmly. “Geraldine and I have it covered.”
“I insist. You’ve worked very hard on this dinner.”
To object further would raise questions she didn’t want to answer. Nina acquiesced.
Once they were alone in the kitchen, all Phillip’s niceties disappeared. “Now I understand why you’ve been fighting so hard,” he said as he rested the dishes on the kitchen counter.
“Meaning?”
“Your husband loves you very much.”
“Does that disappoint you?” Nina said, shoving dishes into the dishwasher.
“Why would it? I’m happy you’ve done well for yourself. You have a beautiful home, a great career, and a husband who adores you. Every father wants his children to be happy.”
“Don’t,” Nina said, as she removed the chocolate flan from the refrigerator and placed it on the countertop. “Don’t pretend you wanted what was best for me. You’ve only ever caused me pain and misery. That’s why I left home and never looked back.
“I so wanted to have a normal father. I felt like some freak because of what you did to me. I couldn’t tell Marc you lived close by. If he found out, he would have insisted on meeting you. I couldn’t allow that to happen. You would have destroyed us like you do every relationship you have.”
Phillip’s brain went into overdrive. He recognized her deception for what it was: self-preservation, one of the most selfish human motives there was. Maybe his daughter was more like him than she was willing to admit. According to Cassie, Marc Kasai was a very patient man who lived by a strict moral code. To a man like that, finding out the wife he adores has been making a fool of him for years would not sit well. He could march right in there and tell Marc the truth, but Nina would retaliate in ways he couldn’t afford. She might tell him that nonsense she’d been spewing about “what he did to her” and if she did, he could kiss a potential political ally goodbye. That was the kind of stuff he couldn’t afford to get out because no one wanted to hear the truth. He needed to get his hands on that damn diary.
“How did it come to this, Nina?” he asked, his voice laced with something resembling regret.
“You want something I can’t give you. Call it forgiveness, absolution, whatever. You want me to smile for the cameras and say what a great father you are and tell people in my demographic you would make a great Governor and they should vote for you. I can’t do that.
“Even if you take me out of the equation, you have an illegitimate child with a young woman who was under age when you got her pregnant. You’re on your third marriage, and to a foreigner at that. You had an affair with your daughter’s best friend. And I don’t even want to think about your business dealings when you were in the private sector. Looks like we have something in common other than DNA. We’re both damaged goods.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Nina missed her best friend terribly, but what could she do? As long as Charlene was fooling around with Phillip, they couldn’t be friends. She didn’t even know if they were still seeing each other after their big blowout, but it didn’t matter. Charlene’s betrayal hurt Nina like someone had peeled her skin from her body.
It had been a hectic day at work, loaded with one marathon meeting after another. Nina just wanted to go home, curl up next to Marc and have him give her one of his achingly delicious foot rubs. She pulled into the garage and entered the kitchen through the side door. She flipped on the lights and stifled a scream. Marc was sitting at the table.
“Babe, you scared the heck out of me. Why were you sitting in the dark?”
“Just thinking. About us,” he said, not looking at her.
Nina noticed a small suitcase, the one he used for short trips, next to his feet.
“You’re traveling? Bummer. You won’t believe the day I had. First of all—”
His response was curt and unexpected. “Don’t bother. I won’t be around to hear it. I’m going to New York. I’ll be at my brother’s place for a few days.”
“You sound like you want to get away from me.”
“I’m surprised you could figure that out. You’ve been so busy trying to keep your lies straight, I don’t think you would have noticed I was gone.”
Nina sat down across from him, her heart pounding in her ears. She’d told so many lies she didn’t know which one he was referring to. It was best to proceed with caution.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
He shot her a look of disbelief. “You really don’t know or are you pretending not to? You’ve become very good at pretending lately. Or maybe deceit has always been in your nature; maybe I just didn’t pay close enough attention.”
Crap! This was it. The category five storm she feared had now made landfall. No matter how angry Marc got, she had to keep herself in check. Charlene’s warning about keeping secrets echoed in her head. She’d promised she would back Nina up when she decided to tell Marc about Phillip but since she tossed Charlene out of her life, her former BFF had no allegiance to her anymore. She felt naked without her sidekick.
“You obviously have something you need to discuss, so get to it.”
“How can you be so casual about it?”
She struggled to keep the growing annoyance out of her voice. “Marc, please. Say what you have to say.”
“You’re a liar and a coward. The scary thing is, I don’t know what else you’re hiding. I don’t know what else you’re capable of. You had to have known the truth would come out eventually. The thing I don’t get is why? Why would you concoct some story about a falling out with your father to explain his absence from your life?”
She kept her voice steady. She couldn’t fall apart just yet. “How did you find out?”
“I had a hunch. I called Charlene. She had quite a lot to say.”
“I bet she did.”
He kept on going, as if she hadn’t spoken. “I never made anything of the fact that you two shared the same last name, which I brushed off as coincidence. It doesn’t make sense to me, Nina. Why would you hurt me this way? You sat at that dinner table and said nothing. There was plenty of opportunity over the years to say something and you didn
’t, which makes me think you never had any intention of telling me. Ever.”
The look on his face broke her heart. He was utterly devastated, his eyes beseeching her for some truth or understanding that would rescue him from having to face the fact that he’d been betrayed.
Nina walked over to the kitchen sink and turned on the faucet. She splashed her face with cold water, as if the gesture would somehow give her the courage to be forthcoming. It had been relatively easy to sidestep Marc’s curiosity with seemingly legitimate excuses. But now he was about to walk out of her life. There were others to consider, not just the two of them. If the truth came out, lives would be shattered. But maybe she didn’t have to tell Marc the whole truth.
Her tongue felt heavy as she attempted to explain away the mess she had made. “You’re right, Marc. I lied to you about Phillip because I didn’t want him in our lives. I lied because sometimes the truth is better left unspoken.”
He was flabbergasted. “That’s it? That’s your explanation? You don’t think I deserve better?”
“You deserve to have a life free from the poison and influence of my father. That’s the simplest way I can explain why I deceived you.”
He stood up and slammed his palm on the table in a rare display of unbridled anger. “That’s not good enough! You need to decide what’s more important to you: The future of this marriage or keeping your secrets. And until you make that decision, I think it’s best if we separate. This shouldn’t be a shock to you, considering I’ve been begging you to confide in your husband for months and you blatantly disregarded those pleas.”
His eyes were red, glistening from the tears he was struggling to hold back. He rubbed his nose on the sleeve of his shirt, picked up his bag and marched out of her life without a backward glance.
Nina headed to the attic without thinking, as if on autopilot. The habit of confiding in Mr. Tibbs was tough to break. The diary had to go. It was the only thing connecting her past to her present, apart from Phillip. She almost stumbled over Mr. Tibbs in her haste to retrieve it from its carefully concealed spot.
“What’s the hurry, Mr. Tibbs? Marc just walked out because I couldn’t bring myself to tell him our secret. I have no recourse but to destroy the diary. I know that was my only trump card, but Marc can’t see what’s written there. I know I can’t go on this way forever. But if he sees what’s in here… I don’t know. I’m really confused right now. I just think people… well, they look at you differently once they find out, do you understand what I mean? We read The Scarlet Letter in high school, remember? We don’t want to be branded by what happened. So I’m going to do the only thing that makes sense: burn it. All the awful things remembered in those pages will be gone forever.”
Nina reached for the diary in its usual hiding place but it wasn’t there. That was strange; she always kept it in the same spot. Maybe she was in a hurry last time and didn’t put it back exactly in the usual spot—but that didn’t make sense, either. She felt panic clawing at her but she did her best to shake it off. She dropped to her knees and went through the attic inch by inch, throwing aside boxes, books, and anything that could conceivably hide an eight by ten diary. She came up empty.
“Something’s wrong, Mr. Tibbs.” Nina raked her hair back with her fingers. “The diary isn’t here. Do you know who took it?”
* * *
PHILLIP HADN’T FELT THIS GOOD in a long time. He sat in his den sipping chardonnay, enjoying the sound of paper going through the shredder. One by one, he fed the pages into the machine and the ripping sound was like a sweet symphony composed just for him. He congratulated himself on his cunning and how easy it had been. Marc, Nina, and even his wife bought the idea that he needed some privacy because he was expecting an important call the very night they all sat down to dinner. Marc gladly served up his home office. That gave Phillip the opportunity to do a little exploring, making his way up to the second floor. As he was walking down the hallway to the master bedroom, something made him look up. He saw the rope hanging from the ceiling. All he had to do was pressure Cassie into giving up her spare key Nina gave her in case of emergencies. The poor kid was so desperate for a reconciliation between him and her older sister she was perfectly willing to accept his story that he was leaving Nina a surprise thank you gift for hosting him and Geraldine. Once in the attic, he just had to think like a woman who was hiding something. The diary wouldn’t be in plain view. It would have to be hidden behind something or in something. The hat box behind the flat screen box seemed as good a place as any. His instincts had been dead on.
His solo celebration came to an abrupt and unwelcome end when a certain redhead poked her head in. “The movie is about to start, are you coming?”
“In a minute,” he answered gruffly.
Geraldine’s eyes fixated on the shredder and the book in Phillip’s hand. “What are you doing?”
“Just shredding some business documents that contain sensitive information.”
“Can’t you do that later? The movie is about to start and the popcorn is getting cold.”
Phillip was reluctant to leave but he didn’t want to arouse suspicion. Geraldine knew his den was off limits when he wasn’t around so he supposed there was no harm in returning to his task later.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
The mouthwatering aroma of cream of coconut in a luscious blend of spicy seasonings emanating from the kitchen took Nina back to her childhood. It was the most comforted and sane she’d felt in the two weeks since Marc left. The image of her mother in a red and white checkered apron, kneading the dough for the dumplings, brought a smile to her lips. This rich, hearty stew was the perfect culinary remedy for a cold and rainy January day. Her dejected spirit needed a lift and she was happy her mother had come to her rescue.
“I can’t wait until the stew is done,” Nina said. “How much longer?”
Daphne Lockwood, an attractive widow in her mid-fifties with flawless milk chocolate skin that mirrored her daughter’s, looked up from her task.
“Not long. This dish used to cheer you right up when you were little.”
Nina stood close to the stove, allowing the vapor from the bubbling stew to caress her face.
“Have you ever believed you were doing the right thing, only to end up with nothing?”
“You still have everything, if you want it,” Daphne countered.
“How can you say that? I dumped my best friend, but not before calling her ugly names. My attempts at becoming a mother ended in failure. My marriage could be over, and Phillip stole my diary. I fail to see the upside of any of this.”
Nina didn’t want to feel sorry for herself, but it was difficult not to. Where had she gone wrong?
“Okay, one thing at a time. Charlene has always looked out for you. She listened to you. Told you what you needed to hear, not what you wanted to hear. Even though you’re the same age, she was like a surrogate mother to you. Then you threw her out like an old pair of shoes. And why? Because she made a bad judgment call. Secondly, you can still have the family you deserve if you just have a little faith. Everything happens for a reason. Thirdly, you need to stop being stubborn and fix whatever problems you and Marc are having, and lastly, what the heck are you talking about, a stolen diary?”
Nina plopped herself down at the table and let out a frustrated sigh. “I just don’t know how much more I can take, Mom. I know we all mess up and I should forgive Charlene, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I may never be a mother and I need to accept that possiblility. And Marc, lying to him was wrong, but I felt I had no choice.”
“What about the diary?” her mother asked, suspense locked on her face.
“I had a diary from when I was younger that had things in it that could cause a lot of trouble for Phillip. I made the mistake of tipping my hand and he stole it.”
“What was in the diary that was so damaging Phillip would steal it? How do you know he took it?”
“I’ve had that diary for a lot of yea
rs and I always kept it in the same spot. Not even Marc knows I had it. You don’t have to be Sherlock Holmes to put the pieces together. The diary disappeared after I blackmailed Phillip with one of the entries, and he came to our house for dinner. I’m positive it’s him. Now, I have nothing left to fight him with.”
Daphne sat next to her daughter and rubbed her arm comfortingly. “Nina, I had no idea that things had gotten so bad between the two of you, but stealing? It sounds like I don’t know Phillip at all. What was in that diary that your father had to stoop so low to acquire it?”
Nina’s stomach was in knots, her earlier hunger now replaced by a raw, piercing dread. She had hoped never to have this conversation with her mother, but her best laid plans had gone horribly awry. Her mother would never be the same. She was sure of it. But what choice did she have?
Nina watched as her mother removed the stew from the stove and placed it on the countertop. She reached into the cabinet for the soup bowls. She hummed an old gospel tune as she poured the stew in each bowl.
“I need to be sitting down for this?” she asked Nina.
“Yes, ma’m.”
“Get the drink pitcher from the fridge and the glasses, will you?”
Nina obeyed. Her mother had a habit of making everything seem normal when she sensed she was in for some bad news. They sat at the table, poured drinks and placed spoons in their respective soup bowls.
“Start from the beginning.”
“You already know about the hitting.”
“Don’t tell me it gets worse.”
Nina gave in to the overwhelming urge to chicken out. She couldn’t do it. “You know what, Mom? I don’t want to talk about Phillip anymore. It’s too depressing. Like you said, I have much more important matters that need my attention, like getting my husband back.”
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