“Cassie, I thought you said your sister was a size six,” Kate said. “She looks like a four. I may need to replace some of the outfits I put aside.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Nina said. “I’ll start with what you have and see what fits. Thanks for helping us out.”
“Not a problem. I’ll be right back.” Kate disappeared to retrieve the merchandise.
Cassie turned to Nina. “Are you sure you and Marc are okay?”
“Yes, Cassie, we are.”
Kate returned with a rack full of outfits, and Nina and Cassie chose fitting rooms right next to each other. Nina hadn’t had this much fun with her sister in a long time as they tried on multiple outfits, met each other at the floor length mirrors outside the fitting rooms, and gave a thumbs up or down on each other’s choices.
The sisters emerged from the store with half a dozen outfits each and matching accessories.
“I’m starving,” Cassie complained. “Let’s find food.”
As they walked and chatted, Nina let her mind drift as Cassie prattled about what so-and-so said to what’s-her-name. When Nina collided with another shopper and dropped a bag, she came out of her daydreaming. She was in the midst of apologizing profusely when she looked up at the familiar redhead.
“Geraldine. I didn’t see you,” Nina said.
“That’s quite all right, darling.”
Geraldine’s inquisitive eyes went from Cassie to Nina and back.
“It’s okay, Geraldine. It’s all out in the open. Marc knows Phillip is my father and poor Cassie doesn’t have to lie for me anymore.”
“Oh, thank God,” Geraldine said, relief washing over her. “It’s much better this way.”
An idea occurred to Nina. In the spirit of being honest and doing away with lies, she had another confession to make to Geraldine and this seemed as good a time as any. They didn’t see each other often and Nina didn’t know if an opportunity would ever present itself again.
“Cassie, how about you go scope out the best place for us to have lunch? Text me when you find a place and they have a table ready for us.”
Both Cassie and Geraldine looked at Nina with intense curiosity.
“I need to talk to Geraldine about something important,” Nina explained.
Cassie obeyed, with curiosity written all over her face.
Geraldine parked herself on a nearby bench and Nina joined her, dropping her load of shopping bags on the ground.
“What’s this about, dear?”
“I wanted to apologize for putting you in an awkward position when you and Phillip came to my house for dinner. It wasn’t fair. I’ve learned my lesson about secrets.”
“No need to apologize. Every girl has a secret or two. That’s just the way it is.”
“Secrets can be the death of a relationship. You should know that.”
“Oh?”
“How did you feel when you found out your husband had a son he kept secret from you?”
Geraldine eyed Nina with comprehension “You must be bloody joking. You?”
“Yes, I sent the picture and the information to your office at Tufts.”
“Why?”
“I wanted to get back at Phillip, give him a dose of his own medicine.”
“I see.”
“Do you?”
“We got into a screaming match about it. He didn’t seem to think it was important to tell me since it happened before we got together.”
“You? Scream?”
“I can hold my own with the best of them.”
Phillip’s controlling behavior extended to his new marriage, Nina thought. His total lack of respect for the feelings of others was one of his worst traits. She could already see how this relationship would end, especially once Geraldine found out just how much she didn’t know about her new husband.
“I’m afraid it doesn’t end with a secret son,” Nina warned.
Geraldine glanced at Nina sideways. “I don’t know how much more my nerves can take. Finding out you were his daughter, and then about this son, well… maybe we married too soon. I feel like I’m living in the bloody twilight zone.”
Nina wondered if this was the right time to tell her. But if not now, when? This impacted Geraldine too, and she deserved to know what she was dealing with. Phillip wasn’t going to tell her and no matter what happened next, she would get hurt.
“This is hard for me, too, but Phillip is keeping something from truly horrible from you. He’ll deny it if you confront him about it, so be warned.”
“What would that be?”
“He molested his own daughter.”
Geraldine looked like she was about to explode. “What on earth would possess you to say something so obscene about your own father? Cassie adores her father, worships him, practically. Why would he do something so heinous?”
“I wasn’t talking about Cassie.”
Geraldine opened her mouth, closed it, then went into silent mode.
“I’m sorry I had to be the one tell you this,” Nina said with sympathy. “The literature I’ve been reading says disclosure is part of the healing process. You had to know, you’re part of his life.”
Nina couldn’t tell from her face if Geraldine believed her or not. She sat perfectly still. Her hands squeezing the edge of the bench was the only indication of movement.
“I can’t believe it. It can’t be true.”
Her reaction was not surprising. “Ask him what happened the evening he gave me the Famous Five novels as a belated birthday gift. I was ten. I’m sure he remembers. The books were written by Enid Blyton. You may have read her work when you were a kid in England.”
Geraldine turned pale, all color draining from her face. The reference to the books resonated with her. She knew Nina was telling the truth.
“That’s absolutely ghastly,” she said, as she continued to struggle between revulsion and compassion. “What have I gotten myself into?”
Geraldine reached for a cigarette and lighter from her purse as she nervously tapped her heels against the marble floor.
“You can’t smoke in here,” Nina said.
“I need something,” she said, her hands trembling. “I married a pervert. Just brilliant.”
“He doesn’t come with a warning sign.”
“He bloody well should,” she said angrily. “I’m sorry, Nina. I had no idea. When Phillip talked about you, after I confronted him about not telling me you were his daughter, he made it sound like you were a rebellious child he couldn’t control. He said you got into all kinds of trouble at school and he was worried sick about how you would end up.”
“The only trouble I got into was when he slipped into my room at night, took what he wanted and didn’t give a damn how it affected me. That’s how he operated.”
“Was there no one you could turn to?”
“He had me well-coached and plenty scared.”
Geraldine reached for the cigarette again.
“Those things are bad for you,” Nina joked.
“Death by cigarette is almost preferable to—” Geraldine was too distraught to finish the thought. She looked away from Nina, as if somehow her association with Phillip made her guilty, too.
“Don’t beat yourself up. You couldn’t have known. I told nobody until recently. But you should know things could get really bad before they get better.”
“How could it possibly get worse?”
“Just protect yourself.”
Geraldine looked at Nina woefully. “How could I have gotten it so wrong?”
“He can be very charming and generous. The dark side surfaces when he’s challenged.”
“Is that what happened with you?”
“I fought back when I was able to.”
“Still, he’s your father. Do you still love him?”
“Good luck, Geraldine.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
“Who else have you told?” Marc asked.
“Cassie and Geraldine.” N
ina placed the piping hot pasta dish in front of Marc. She joined him at their kitchen table for dinner, one of the most routine tasks of domestic life she now had a new appreciation for, after the near collapse of their marriage.
“How did it go?”
“Cassie was devastated but immediately went into her safe place: denial. Geraldine was in shock but she can hold her own against Phillip.”
“I’m sure she will. She struck me as a fighter. Kind of like you. Maybe that’s why the two of you get along.”
“Perhaps. My mother wasn’t so kind in her response. She said he deserved to die and even kicked him in the groin for good measure.”
“Wise woman, your mother.”
“You agree with her?”
“Any man who would even think about his daughter that way should be shot.”
“It’s complicated, like I said.”
“What’s complicated about it?”
The little girl who saw Phillip Copeland as her daddy still existed somewhere deep inside Nina, and it was difficult to get rid of her. It was as if the adult Nina was split into two different people; one yearned for what could have been—a normal father-daughter relationship with goodnight kisses on the forehead, measured protectiveness against potential suitors, an understanding shoulder to cry on. The other was a woman who despised him and held her own over his particular brand of tyranny. She had to find a way to reconcile the two. Maybe it was time to take her mother’s advice. At least, look into it.
“I don’t know,” she said, shrugging. “I guess some small part of me hopes he regrets what he did. That would humanize him.”
Marc came around to her side of the table and wrapped his arms around her.
“You don’t need him. You never did. You have to stop thinking of him as your father. It will only prolong your suffering.”
“How do I do that, Marc?”
“Stop being afraid.”
There was moisture splattering on his arm, one molecule at a time. She reached up and brushed away his tears with her fingertips. “Can you get me the Haagen Daz from the freezer? I don’t feel like eating dinner. I’m going to have the whole tub and don’t you dare try to stop me.”
“Save some for me,” he said.
Marc collected two spoons from the kitchen drawer and placed the ice-cream at the center of the table. They both dug in.
“Where were the adults, Nina?” he asked. “How come nobody stopped him? How come no one protected you?”
She shrugged nonchalantly. “Who would believe me even if I said something? Who would believe that a successful executive and community leader with a beautiful wife and the perfect family in a wealthy neighborhood was raping his daughter on a regular basis?”
“What about Theresa?”
“She was busy with her career. Probably didn’t pay too much attention.”
“She was responsible for you,” he said wistfully. “She should be held accountable, too.”
“I never faulted her for not coming to my rescue.”
“Maybe you should.”
“She wouldn’t have turned him in even if she found out. He was the father of her only child.”
“So you were the sacrificial lamb?”
“I never thought of it that way.”
As the discussion continued, Nina had to gather up the courage to tell Marc that Phillip was partially responsible for the loss of their child. If they were going to have a fresh start, she needed to be one hundred percent honest about everything. Marc was devastated all over again. He threw a chair against the kitchen wall in a fit of rage. After she got him to calm down, he vowed for the second time that Phillip would pay for everything he took from them.
* * *
WHEN PHILLIP TURNED THE KEY into the door of his penthouse duplex, he wanted nothing more than to sit on the deck with several bottles of wine and enjoy the hilltop views of Brookline and Back Bay. He just wanted to forget this God-forsaken day ever happened. The primaries would be held in six months, followed by the Gubernatorial race two months later in November. And still, he had lingering issues that could derail his candidacy, which he was close to announcing.
Charlene barged into his office bright and early and broke into hysterics, calling him all sorts of vile names he didn’t even think she had the vocabulary for. She threatened to tell anyone who would listen he was a rapist and it was only when he told her he wasn’t above using violence to achieve his objectives did she back off. To make things worse, his wife had been been increasingly jumpy lately, avoiding him at every turn. When he confronted her about it, she claimed she was jittery because she recently quit smoking. Cassie was visiting her mother in New York, so he would have a little peace and quiet before Geraldine came home.
When he opened the door, all thoughts of a quiet evening suddenly grew legs and ran like hell. Sitting in his living room, as calm as could be, was Marc Kasai.
“You’ve let yourself in. This must be important.” Phillip hoped he didn’t sound as pissed as he felt at the intrusion.
“It is. Otherwise, I would have called first.”
Phillip took the couch opposite Marc. “What can I do for you, Marc?”
“First, you’re going to apologize to my wife and beg her to forgive you. Then you’re going to tell family and friends what you did to her. And in your final act of contrition, you will seek psychiatric help for paedophilia. By then, I would have settled on an appropriate way to make you suffer.”
It took everything he had to show restraint. Who the hell did this guy think he was? “Obviously you’re mistaken,” Phillip said with forced civility. “Everybody makes mistakes, so I’ll chalk this up to confusion. I’m going to have to ask you to leave now.”
“I see you don’t like any of my suggestions,” Marc observed. “Prison is a good option in cases like these. You know what they do to child molesters in prison, don’t you?”
After Marc left, Phillip reached for a bottle of vodka in his liquor cabinet. He didn’t bother using a glass. He drank straight from the bottle. His own child was out to get him, after everything he did for her. She wouldn’t get away with it.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
THE FRAMINGHAM WORCESTER COMMUTER RAIL came to a stop on platform three at South Station. Nina stepped off the train, one of the throngs of suburban dwellers who worked in the city. A panicked Eric was on the other line when she picked up her ringing cell phone.
“I don’t know what you did, but one of our board members is looking for you. He’s probably waiting for you at South Station with smoke coming out of his ears.”
“Who is it?”
“Doctor Copeland.”
“Did he say what he wanted?”
“No.”
“How did he know I was taking the train in?”
“I’m sorry, Nina. He’s really scary and I like my job. He could get me fired. I had to tell him.”
Don’t worry. I’ll take care of it.”
Nina hung up with much trepidation. She had no desire to go another round with Phillip. His reputation and credibility were unraveling fast. It began when Nina told her mother, then Charlene, then Marc, and then his wife.
A seething Phillip pounced on Nina the minute he spotted her walking towards the Dunkin Donuts inside the station. It was late spring and today was unseasonably warm, so Nina wanted to get her favorite iced coffee beverage.
“Where do you get off interfering in my marriage? How dare you?”
Nina ignored him and got in line to place her order.
He grabbed her arm. “I’m talking to you. I won’t be dismissed, Nina.”
“Get off me,” Nina yelled loud enough so the other patrons in line could hear. They all stared at Phillip disapprovingly, which got him to back off, but then he starting hissing in her ears.
“Geraldine left me because you spewed some garbage to her and she was stupid enough to believe you. You’re going fix this.”
“Your wife left you because you’re a lousy hus
band and she caught on. And I’m not a marriage counselor, so I can’t fix anything.”
It was Nina’s turn to order. She observed Phillip out of the corner of her eyes, nervously appraising the crowd, as if plotting ways he could cause physical harm without being noticed. After she got her iced coffee, Nina continued walking towards the main exit. She would walk to her office by turning right on Summer Street. She figured as long as she was in a public space, he wouldn’t try anything stupid.
She took a sip of her drink and adjusted the straps of her purse without saying a word, knowing full well her non-response would make him even angrier. It was a technique she learned from him and now she’d turned the tables.
“You need to stop this before somebody gets really hurt. You call Geraldine and tell her you made up the whole thing because you’re angry with me.”
“I can’t do that. What I told her was true.”
They came to an intersection and Nina stopped to let traffic go by. He got in her face, his eyes blazing with uncontained rage.
“Either you tell Geraldine you made a mistake or your precious Marc meets with an unfortunate accident.”
Nina couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She knew he had a violent streak, but murder? This was a whole other level of insanity.
“You’re out of control. Get a grip on yourself. Take some pills. I don’t care. But if you ever threaten anyone I care about again, I will ruin you.”
* * *
ONE WEEK LATER, NINA WAS running six miles an hour on the treadmill at her local gym when a story on the flat screen TV in front of her caught her attention. She shut off her iPod and removed the ear buds so she could hear clearly. The story was about the Dare to Dream Foundation College Scholarship Awards. The reporter was interviewing the four recipients outside the foundation headquarters on High Street in Boston. Their glowing faces full of youthful promise, and talk of what the scholarship meant to them tugged at Nina. One of the students wanted to be a research scientist, while another had plans to study non-profit management so she could create her own foundation when she graduated from college. They talked about how the future they had planned wouldn’t have been possible without the scholarships they just received. Nina didn’t stick around to hear the rest of the story. She got off the treadmill and headed to the ladies’ locker room.
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