by Gloria Craw
“I could do it in my sleep,” I replied.
Lillian was waiting for me when I got to the Shadow Box that afternoon. The minute she saw my face, she asked, “Sebastian found you, didn’t he?”
The answer must have been written in my expression, because she said, “We are sometimes at our strongest when we don’t have the luxury of overthinking things.”
She led me to a chair by the window and we sat down. “What are you going to do now?” she asked.
“Let Sebastian come for me. When he does, we fight him.”
“Sounds like suicide,” she said.
“You’re always so optimistic.”
She thought a moment. “I’ve lived a long life. I’ll come, too.”
I laughed. Lillian would never change. “I can’t have you come. I need you to look out for the McKyes. Ian said he’ll have extra people on it, but I don’t know them. I’ll be able to concentrate better on what I need to do if you’re protecting them, too.”
“Fine,” she agreed. “But I’d give almost anything to see Sebastian Truss die.”
“I promise to give you all the gory details if I survive. In case I don’t, I want to say thank you for watching over me all this time and for giving me the perfect job. I love you for that.”
Lillian was a little shocked that I’d said I loved her, but I did. She was sour and grumpy most of the time, but she’d looked out for me. I’d come to depend on her without knowing it. I’d really miss her antisocial attitude when I left. She gazed out the window for a moment.
When she looked back at me, her eyes were watery. “I wasn’t always like I am today,” she said with a sad smile. “I know what people think of me. They think I’m distant and unpleasant. But I wasn’t always like this. I was young like you once. I had family and friends. I was full of hope, happiness, and dreams.” She shook her head. “But over time, my hopes were disappointed. Those I loved died or moved in different directions, and my happiness dimmed.
“In order to cope, I withdrew from everyone. I thought I could limit the pain that way, but another kind of pain took its place.” A tear rolled down her softly wrinkled cheek. “There are two kinds of emotional pain. The pain of loving and letting go, and the pain of never loving at all. I’ve come to believe that never loving at all hurts worse. My advice is to love with an open heart. If you have to leave the love behind, at least you have memories to take with you.”
I knew how much it cost Lillian to open herself up like that. She sniffed and wiped away the tear. Then she was back to her stoic self. “Did you find anything useful in Angela’s notes?” she asked.
“No, but I haven’t gone through all of them yet.”
“Why don’t you sit here and read through the rest of the notebook? I’ll take care of the store today.”
“Thanks, Lillian. I’ve got to make a call and check up on my mom first. Then I’ll get right to it,” I said.
She gave me a half smile and then walked away.
I made myself push through Angela’s entries until I reached the last one. They came to the house, she’d written. John and I held them off, but we’re on the run now. My sister has been forced to run as well. We can’t seek shelter in the clan. We pose too great a danger to them. If I could figure it out, if I could break through the barrier, I would have something to bargain with. I would have something to trade my life and John’s for. Tomorrow will be the end one way or another. He’s sent an army after us this time. I can sense the Truss all around us. In all my years, I’ve never sensed such greed in a clan before. It shrouds them like a cloud…I told John to run, but he won’t. He says he’ll die anyway. He’d rather be close to me when it happens.
I closed my eyes. As sad as the last entry was, there was something in it, a clue. I made myself feel the differences between human thoughts and dewing thoughts as I reread it. I felt again the open places in the human mind that allowed my thoughts in and the steady ropelike thought strand in the dewing mind where no open places existed.
Then it happened. Like seeing a four-by-five photo switch into a panoramic view, my outlook was widened and deepened.
Human thoughts were choppy and messy. So much so that they diverged from the thoughts of other humans. Human thoughts were messy but unique to the individual, shooting off of a main thought like the branches of a tree. Dewing thoughts were like a rope that connected all of their minds together. That’s why Angela had been able to feel the greed of the Truss around her. That’s why dewing could sense one another and feel clan affiliation. It even explained likeness to a certain degree.
Somewhere deep in the dewing mind, beneath the thought strand I already knew was there, there had to be another strand. One that ran between all dewing at once, a sort of shared consciousness.
Angela had been looking for a way to break through the dewing thought pattern. There wasn’t one, but what if a thoughtmaker could wrap around the strand of shared consciousness? Was that cloaking?
The voice in my mind whispered, Yes.
I couldn’t be sure if the process worked until I tried it out.
At ten to seven, Lillian came to sit at the window with me again. She thrust an envelope into my hands. “For unexpected expenses if you decide to leave,” she said. I checked inside and found a couple thousand dollars in cash. I started to object and hand it back to her, but she refused to take it. “There’s one condition. When you finish Sebastian Truss, you have to contact me.”
We both knew that would depend on whether I was still alive. “I will,” I promised.
We sensed Ian coming before the bells above the door jingled. “I can’t decide if you’re really brave or truly insane,” Lillian muttered, looking up at him.
“What’s bravery or sanity when you’ve got destiny on your side?” Ian replied.
Without a good-bye for either of us, she got up and headed for the back of the store.
Ian sat next to me. He wasn’t in a hurry to start a conversation. He just hummed while looking out onto the street. A feeling of peaceful connectedness washed over me. Ian was my friend. Maybe in a different life, we could have been more than friends. Whatever it was between us at that moment, I liked how it felt to be around him. I gave myself permission to enjoy it.
We watched the shadows grow a little longer on the street. “I’d better get you home,” Ian said eventually. He got up and pulled me to my feet. “You ready to go?”
I took a last look around the Shadow Box. “Yes,” I replied.
I walked in the door of my house, knowing my life would never be the same. I wanted to make something special for the last meal I would share with the McKyes, but it was late, so I made spaghetti. The dinner was quiet. No great bruises up the side of my head to talk about, no sleepovers to discuss, and no birthdays to celebrate. Mom was okay, and my car was back in our garage. My dad said it had been an easy fix—it just needed new spark plugs.
I took mental snapshots of my family doing the normal things I’d taken for granted for years. Mom was recovering from the dewing’s attack at my school and lying on the couch to rest. There was no doubt in my mind she’d try to go to the gym the next day. My easygoing dad, who saw the bright side of any problem, was watching the news. And Alex, the gangly boy who’d been my closest friend during the last three years, was playing Xbox in the den.
The next morning, I packed my backpack the same way I’d done for years. Then I sneaked into my parents’ room and took Mom’s turquoise bracelet, the one the same color as Ian’s eyes, from her jewelry box. She rarely wore it, and I felt sure she wouldn’t realize it was missing for a while. I took one of my dad’s fancy handkerchiefs out of his drawer. It smelled like his cologne. Holding it to my nose, I breathed in and let my mind show me all of the wonderful memories I had of him.
Once Alex had gone down to breakfast, I searched through the drawers of his desk. I found a picture of him playing with Tsar and another of us warring at some video game. I figured he’d know if those went missing, so I
settled for taking a couple of pretty rocks from his collection. Hiding these treasures in my backpack, I went downstairs to breakfast.
Brandy called while I was clearing my place. “Can you pick me up today?” she asked. “I left the headlights on last night and ran the battery out.”
“Sure, but can’t Ian jump it with his car?”
“He left early. He’s already at school.”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes,” I said.
It wasn’t part of my usual routine to kiss my parents before leaving for school, but I did it that day. Mom and Dad were surprised but also pleased. The happiness and pride I saw in their eyes as they looked at me nearly broke my heart.
Alex moved fast when he saw me coming. So I smacked him on the top of the head as a farewell gesture…and then I left.
Chapter Twenty-Two
“I haven’t felt any of Sebastian’s people around,” Brandy said as I drove out of the Thanes’ gates. “They’re bound to show up soon, though.”
Brandy seemed fine to me, but as we drove I could tell her energy had dropped again during the night. It was best that Sebastian was coming for me. She was fading too fast to wait. That thought made me choke up a little. “Thank you, Brandy,” I said. “Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for helping me with all of this.”
“Of course,” she replied with a smile. “I wish I could see the future like Katherine. I’d like to know how things turn out for you and Ian.”
“You mean if we live or die? I’d like to know that, too.”
“You’ll live,” she said with a certainty I didn’t share. “But that’s not what I mean. I think you two are good for each other. Maybe destiny intends for you to be together.”
“I don’t think I’m meant to be with anyone,” I said quietly. “At least not for very long. I know you care for Ian. Believe me, you don’t want him to get tangled up in the mess of my life.”
She laughed. “Messes don’t scare Ian. He likes to sort them out.”
“Some of them can’t be sorted out.”
She tipped her head to the side. “But there’s a lot of fun to be had while you try.”
I smiled at her and then said, “I’m going to miss you.”
“Don’t be sad. I’m going to be with Jack again. My death shouldn’t be a sad thing to anyone.”
“You think you’re actually going to be with him again?”
“We have no religion or teachings about what happens after we die, but I’ve always felt that we continue on. Even though I can’t see him, I feel Jack around. I know he’ll be waiting for me when I’m done here.”
I thought back to the times I’d heard that voice speak to me. In my heart, I’d always known it was my mother’s voice, the voice of the White Laurel. As crazy as it once would have seemed to me, maybe Brandy was right and we did exist in some form after death.
“I’m going to ask you to do something for me, Alison,” she said, sounding very serious. “I know you’re unsure about the future, but I need you to help Ian. He and I dealt with Jack’s death together, but I’m the one that came out of it in better shape. Ian not only misses Jack, he feels guilty about taking his place as heir to the clan chiefdom. He can’t see himself in that role, and it hangs over him. If you don’t want to stay with him, at least check in on him from time to time. Help him remember this time in his life and what he’s accomplished.”
I pulled my car into a parking space and cut the engine. “I will.”
Brandy reached over to hug me. She pulled my head to her shoulder and patted my hair the way a mother would a child. It was the first indication she’d ever given that she was three times my age. Then she pushed me back to arm’s length. “You deserve to be happy,” she said. “Remember that.”
“I’ll remember.”
Reaching into the front of her backpack, she pulled a folded paper out. “This is for you. Don’t read it until our business with Sebastian is finished.”
I nodded and put the paper in my pocket. Brandy was smiling when I looked up.
“I think the Golden One wants to talk to you,” she said, pointing toward Ian, who was coming our way. She pretended to get a phone call when he opened my car door. Motioning for us to go ahead, she winked at me.
“Are you ready for this?” Ian asked.
“Ready as I’ll ever be.”
Aware that hostile eyes were probably watching, I kept my expression neutral when I glanced over at him. The sun glinted off his light hair and brightened the color of his eyes. He’s the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.
In a strange parallel, he whispered, “You’re beautiful.”
I laughed. “I didn’t know you had vision problems.”
“I don’t. I thought you were beautiful the first time I saw you standing in line at registration. In spite of those ugly glasses and your reluctance to return a smile.”
“You’re beautiful to me, too, Ian.”
“Of course I am,” he said, cocking his head to the side.
I pushed him hard in the arm. He just laughed. When we reached the side doors of the school, he put his arm around my waist and pulled me between the brick wall and a tree that sheltered us from onlookers. He put his hand on the back of my neck, and my eyes closed in response. I leaned into him when he kissed me gently on the lips. “We’re going to get through this,” he whispered.
I opened my eyes. “I hope so.”
“We will,” he insisted, making me look at him. “You have to believe it as much as I do. You never backed down from anything we threw at you this week. Your abilities run as deep as any of us hoped they would, and you learn on the fly. You will be strong today, and Brandy and I will be right behind you.”
“Are you scared?” I asked.
“A little, but fear isn’t a bad thing for me. It quickens my reaction time.”
I thought about my conversation with Spencer the day after Ian killed the tiger. He said his son was a trained fighter with extraordinary energy. I knew that was true. I’d seen what Ian could do with my own eyes. I hoped desperately that his abilities would be enough when he fought Sebastian.
“Don’t get killed,” I ordered.
He hugged me tight. “That’s second on my to-do list. First on my list is to make sure you don’t get killed.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
The snatch took place in a crowded hallway between third and fourth periods. I couldn’t feel any dewing vibration around, so it was a complete surprise when a needle punctured the skin on my upper arm. I had enough time to turn around and look for the human that had given me the shot, but there were too many people around to tell which it had been. Fear tightened my chest as the world around me shrank to a tiny pinpoint of light.
I woke up facedown on a mattress with no idea where I was. It took me a few seconds to remember what had happened. Rolling onto my back, I felt a heaviness in my body from whatever drug they’d given me. I rubbed my eyes, trying to clear the haze from my mind.
Sitting up, I realized I was wearing a white dress with lace at the hem. It didn’t fit well. The arms were too short, and the middle was baggy on me.
Concentrating, I felt for dewing vibrations. I could pinpoint three. One came from the next room. I knew exactly whom it was coming from. The other two were farther away and unfamiliar to me. I was in no hurry to see the dewing in the next room, so I walked to the window and parted the curtains.
In the soft dusk, the Las Vegas Strip was already lit up like Christmas on steroids. I’d assumed Sebastian would fly me out of Vegas as soon as he could. For the first time ever, I thanked destiny for proving me wrong. Being in Vegas, at least for a little while longer, would make it easier for Ian and Brandy to find me.
I checked around for my backpack and found it resting against the dresser. My jeans and T-shirt were nowhere to be found. I would have changed back into them if I could.
A tray had been left on the dresser. An assortment of small sandwiches and cakes as well as a cry
stal pitcher of ice water had been artistically arranged on it. There was also a soft-looking shawl folded over the end of the bed and a pair of white slippers with shiny beads in the shape of flowers over the toes. The ugly slippers upped the creep factor significantly.
I’d read accounts of ancient human sacrifices in which the sacrifice was fed and dressed in the finest before being strapped to an altar to have his or her heart ripped out. Icy pins prickled down my spine. To keep myself from losing it, I repeated Katherine saw Sebastian Truss dead over and over in my mind.
I couldn’t bring myself to sit on the bed again, so I went to the double doors at the far end of the room and flung them open. The outer room was just as lush as the bedroom, but one thing in it didn’t fit the setting. Luke Stentorian was sitting hunched in chair in the middle of the room. His mousy brown hair was standing on end, and he had his face in his hands. When he looked up, he was his usual sickly self, only with two days’ beard and wrinkled clothes.
“Hello, Luke,” I said with contempt.
His eyes were watery when he replied, “Hello, Alison.”
“That’s all you’ve got to say?” I mocked. Sitting in a chair opposite him with my back ramrod straight and my fists clenched, I continued, “I thought you’d try for something more dramatic, like, ‘Prepare to be crushed by my pal Sebastian.’”
Luke looked down at the floor again.
“I’d ask why you’re here,” I said, “but it’s fairly obvious. Sebastian left you to guard me, didn’t he? By the way, how does it feel to work for a monster like him? Is it everything you imagined it would be?”
“I don’t work for Sebastian,” he muttered.
“Spare me the act. I’m not that stupid. You’ve been sending him information about the clan chiefs. You’re the freaking coward who ran to tell Sebastian who I was. You’re the reason I’m here, you sickly creep.”
“I’m not,” Luke said quietly. “I would never work for Sebastian. My parents hated him and what he did to your clan. I would never betray their memory…or you. Sebastian’s people drugged me and dumped me here without telling me why. I was only half conscious when they brought you in.”