“I wanted to come by and check on you. You’ve seemed really out of it today.”
“I’m just tired. I didn’t sleep much last night.”
He stared at her as if he expected her to elaborate. When she didn’t he asked, “Does this sudden bout of insomnia have anything to do with a firefighter whose bed you’ve been sharing?”
She thought about denying it, but what was the point? “Yes. It does.”
“Go on.”
Knowing this wasn’t going to be a short visit after all, she moved into the living room portion of the room and snuggled up into the chair that sat in the corner. Theo took a seat on the couch beside her and set his bag on the glass coffee table in front of him.
She took a deep breath and started talking. She told him everything. From the first time she met Eli, to their first kiss, to their secret relationship, to the morning they were supposed to get married. She told him about not seeing again him until the fight and then not having any idea that he lived in Hope Falls. She told him about the conversation with her grandmother about her first marriage and her father showing up with the papers. She told him that when she’d confronted him, Eli had thought that Theo had given her the papers. She told him that before anything could be resolved, he got called away on an emergency and that she hadn’t heard from him since. Not a text. Not a call. Nothing.
When she finished, he sat there and stared at her for several beats before saying, “Wow.”
“Wow? That’s all you got, Oprah?” she teased, suddenly feeling a lot lighter having unburdened herself from things she’d never told anyone.
“I knew you guys had a past, and I knew that you had a broken heart when I met you, but I had no idea it was that…complicated.”
Complicated. That was the same word that Eli had used. She was beginning to hate that word.
“Why did he think I gave you the papers?”
“Oh right, I almost forgot.” Kenzie laughed at the ridiculousness of his reasoning. “He said that you were in love with me. How ridiculous is that?”
She expected Theo to laugh at how utterly ludicrous it was, but he didn’t. “What did you say when he said that?”
Her brow wrinkled above her nose. “That you weren’t, obviously.”
Theo scrubbed his hands over his face, scooted back on the couch, and leaned against the pillows. There was a soft thunk as his head fell back against the wall. Again, not the response she’d been expecting. He didn’t say anything, just stared up at the ceiling. As silence hung between them, Mackenzie shifted in the chair uncomfortably and tucked her legs underneath her.
When he finally tilted his head upright and his eyes met hers, Mackenzie felt the same dread she’d experienced when she’d stared at the envelope that her father had.
“What if it’s not obvious?” Theo’s tone was serious.
He was speaking in riddles and she was too tired to puzzle out what he was trying to tell her. “What are you talking about?”
Exhaling loudly through his nose, he leaned forward and ran his hands down his jean-clad thighs. He cursed under his breath as his hands fisted on his knees. “Never mind. It doesn’t matter.”
“Theo?” Her voice quivered with uncertainty. She didn’t want to lose her friend, but she had a sinking feeling that after this conversation nothing would ever be the same. But he was her best friend, and she wasn’t about to let things be left unsaid between them. He meant too much to her. “Talk to me.”
He shook his head. “Do you remember when Oliver told you he knew that you never loved him, but he thought he could love you enough for you both?”
“Yes.”
“Well, guess what. I thought the same thing. I told myself it was different for me, that I felt that way because I was the closest person to you. Even when you were with Oliver, you still told me things you didn’t tell him.”
He was right. She had. That was another red flag that her marriage wasn’t healthy.
“I knew that you would never love me like that. But I thought I could be in love with you and just be friends with you. I thought that being your best friend would be enough. But after seeing you with Eli, it’s not.”
Shock was too tame of a word to describe what she was feeling. Theo had just said that he thought he could be in love with her and just be friends. She opened her mouth to say something, but no sound came out. She had no idea how to respond to that. She tried anyway. “I…I don’t…I’m not…I just…I…”
“Stop,” Theo grinned, and she could breathe again. “This is not your fault. You don’t need to say anything.”
She knew that he was letting her off the hook, and maybe she should take the out, but he was her best friend. “You were always dating. You could give Hugh Hefner a run for his money.”
His left shoulder lifted in a shrug. “They were all there because you weren’t.”
“Theo, I don’t know what to say. I just never thought of—”
He held up his hand. “I know. You don’t have to friend zone me. You already did that twelve years ago. I’m going to be fine. Trust me. Seeing you with Eli has, believe it or not, been good for me.” He smiled widely.
“Right. I’m sure it has.” She played along with his sarcasm.
“No, I’m serious. Your grandmother is a wise woman, you can’t be in love with two men and he is obviously the one. I always knew I wasn’t, but I don’t think that I would’ve been able to move on if I hadn’t seen with my own two eyes how you look at him. Like you hear Enrique Iglesias singing ”Hero“ every time you see him. You light up like a Christmas tree whenever he walks in the room and you melt like butter whenever he touches you. It’s not been an easy pill to swallow.
“The only thing that had made it go down any easier, the spoon full of sugar if you will, is that anyone with two eyes can see that Eli loves you. He’s crazy about you. And I can’t tell you what to do about those papers. And I don’t know what happened when you guys were kids, but I do know that the man I’ve been watching like a hawk since we landed in Mountain Mayberry, the man I grilled in an interview, that man is a good guy. And I think you owe it to him and to yourself to keep an open mind.”
“Maybe you are the Oprah of your generation.” She was only half joking.
“Finally.” He threw up his hands. “I get the respect I deserve.”
She laughed, and there was a knock at the door.
“Oh, I ordered room service.” She started to get up.
“I’ll get it on my way out. I’m gonna take off.” He picked up his bag and stood.
She pointed to it. “Did you need to show me something?”
“Nah. I just knew if I had this you’d think I stopped by for work and you’d let me in.” He winked.
She smiled and shook her head. When he started to go, she stopped him. “Theo. Are we okay?”
“Yeah. We’re good.” He looked down at her for a second, then leaned down and kissed her on her forehead. Then headed to the door as he said, “Don’t worry about me. I’m going to go down to the bar and tell the first hot blonde my story of heartbreak.”
“Theo,” she sighed in exasperation as she threw a pillow at him.
He blocked it. “What? I need to begin the healing process and what better way than in the comfort of a beautiful woman.”
As much as she wished he were joking, she knew he wasn’t. But she did know that they would be okay. That he would be okay. And that she would be okay no matter what happened in the future with Eli. Getting the things off her chest that she’d held on to for so long had liberated her. They’d been a steel ball tied to her ankle, drowning her, and now that she’d freed herself from it, she could swim to the surface and breathe.
Sure, it would be great if things worked out with Eli and she ended up at a resort island built for two. But if she ended up alone and treading water until she washed ashore on a different beach, that would be okay, too. As long as she was living an honest, authentic life, she’d be fine.
&nb
sp; But, she still really hoped that the resort island built for two worked out.
She heard the door open but didn’t hear any talking or a cart being rolled in. She stood to see what was going on.
*
Eli lifted his fist to knock again. He needed to talk to Kenzie and he knew she was in her room. He’d run into Gabe in the lobby, and he’d told her that Kenzie had gone up to her room about an hour ago. He’d also told him which room she was in, which had saved him from going door to door since Kenzie wasn’t picking up her phone.
The call last night had been a four-car pileup on 89 that involved a flipped gas tanker. Thankfully, his crew was already on the scene when one of the cars sparked and ignited the spilled fuel. They’d been able to contain and put the fire out and get everyone that was pinned in their vehicles out safely. The cleanup had taken longer than he’d anticipated, but the second he got back to the station he told Jake that he had a personal emergency he needed to take care of.
The chief had given him a knowing look and said, “Have fun in Vegas.”
So he’d hopped on the next flight out of Sacramento and come straight here. He’d had a short delay when a group of fans that were there for the fight recognized both Gabe and Eli, because they’d followed the story. He’d had to take selfies with all ten of them. Individually.
But now he was here and he wasn’t going to leave until he talked to Kenzie.
Before his knuckles made contact, he heard the handle click and relief washed over him. It was short-lived, however, when instead of Kenzie standing in front of him, he saw Theo.
The two men stared at each other for a moment. Eli shook his head, maybe Gabe got the rooms confused. He was about to explain when he heard a voice.
“Is it room service?” Kenzie asked from inside.
He didn’t have the wrong room.
“No.” Theo shook his head.
“Who is it?” Kenzie walked around the corner wearing a robe. Her wet hair fell around her shoulders.
When she saw him, her mouth dropped open, and she looked almost as surprised as she had when they’d run into each other in Vegas before.
Jealousy sliced through him, but he forced himself to ignore it. He’d told Kenzie that it wasn’t what she thought and maybe that was the case here. Even if it wasn’t, did he have any right to be upset?
No.
They hadn’t exactly parted on the best terms.
“Hey, man.” Eli nodded at Theo.
“Hey.” Theo’s chin dipped as he stepped out of the room.
Eli moved to the side to let him pass, and he thought for a moment that he was going to tell him to get the hell out of there and stay away from Kenzie. Eli was trying not to be a possessive asshole and let his jealousy get the better of him.
Theo held the door open a sliver with one hand and slapped the other one on Eli’s shoulder. He took a deep breath and with pure sincerity said, “Take good care of her.”
“I will.” Eli’s face probably looked as shocked as Kenzie’s just had.
Theo pushed the door open before walking down the hall. Eli snapped out of his stunned state and put his hand out before the door closed. When he pressed against it, he saw Kenzie was still in the same spot.
“Can I come in?”
Her head bobbed up and down.
He walked in and shut the door. As much as he wanted to rush to her, to pull her into his arms, he knew that he couldn’t. For one thing, he wasn’t sure she wanted him anywhere near her. And even if she did, he had to clear the air once and for all.
Eli took a deep breath. “I’m sorry I had to go before I could explain everything to you. I reacted badly yesterday. I don’t know how you got the papers and I don’t care. You’re right. It doesn’t matter. You’ve deserved answers for a long time, and I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to give them to you.
“About a month before we were supposed to elope, I was walking home from work and I saw Kenny throwing rocks at the glass front of the Corner Market. He was crying and I ran across the street calling his name. But he managed to break the glass before I got there. By the time I made it to him, he was in the frozen food section trying to get ice cream. He kept saying that it was your birthday and he needed to get you ice cream.
“I tried to calm him down and tell him that it wasn’t your birthday, but he wouldn’t listen to me. I’m guessing that he must’ve triggered the alarm because the next thing I knew Mrs. Stoltz was standing there with a bat in her hand yelling at us to get out. Kenny kept screaming that he needed ice cream and she was screaming for us to get out. Kenny panicked, he got scared and started to run out of the store, she swung, and I tackled her to the ground before the bat hit Kenny’s head.
“The cops showed up and one of them recognized me from the Fire and Police softball league that my dad played in. They called him and he came down. He paid for the damages, and once the cops told Mrs. Stoltz that Kenny was Kenneth Sutton’s son, she didn’t want to press charges.”
“Why didn’t you tell me about that?” Kenzie was shaking her head.
“Because…” Shame rose in Eli’s chest. He felt guilty because he’d been selfish. The rest had been out of his hands, but not telling Kenzie about the break-in was purely out of self-serving motivations. “I was scared if I did you wouldn’t go through with marrying me. I was scared that you wouldn’t want to leave Kenny alone in your dad’s house if you found out that had happened.”
Eli pushed past his guilt and continued, “Anyway, I thought it was done, and then the night before we were supposed to leave, your father was waiting for me when I got off work. He was standing by my car. He’d somehow found out that you and I were planning on getting married. He told me that there was no way he was going to let that happen. That I was leaving, that night, and I was not to contact you ever again.
“I told him that I wasn’t going anywhere, that I was going to marry you, and that I loved you.
“He said that he wouldn’t allow his daughter to marry a thug. That’s when he handed me the paper and said he’d spoken to Mrs. Stoltz and the video surveillance of the night of the break-in was damaged but her memory of the events was clear. She’d found me breaking in, alone and armed, and I attacked her.
“He threatened me and told me that if I didn’t leave that night and go meet a recruiter that he’d contacted in the Marine Corp, he was filing the report. I told him to do it. I knew the truth, and even if I got in trouble for something he made up, I didn’t care as long as I had you.
“That’s when he pulled out statements from the responding officers that were on the scene. It stated that my father had coerced them into a cover up by threatening their families, which your father made clear to me was how he had gotten to them. It said they’d witnessed him paying off Mrs. Stoltz so she wouldn’t file a report. He had signed affidavits from both officers.
“He said I had the night to decide, but if I wasn’t at Camp Pendleton by the next morning at eight am, he was going to go see his good friend the DA and make sure that criminal charges were filed against my father and that the case ended up in the not-so-honorable Judge Stanley’s court. So, I went home, left a note for my parents saying that I was joining the Corp and I left.”
“Why didn’t you come to me?” Tears were falling down Kenzie’s face. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Why would I?” Eli raised his arms in question. “You wouldn’t even stand up to your father and tell him that we were a couple. Every time I asked, you told me that he’d been through enough and you didn’t want to upset him. You chose him every time, and I’m not blaming you for that. You were dealing with your brother and your mom leaving, but why would I think that you’d take my side?”
Now that he was on a roll he couldn’t stop. “And the money, I didn’t find out about until I got back from basic. I looked at my bank statement and almost shit my pants. I called the bank and ended up having to hire an accountant and lawyer to follow the paper trail. When I found out it
was him, I confronted him, and he said that it was insurance. If I ever decided to go to you and tell you, he had the deposit to prove that he’d paid me off.
“I didn’t keep it, Kenzie. It’s in a trust in Kenny’s name. Your grandmother is the trustee and when she is no longer able to oversee it, you will be.
“The first time I got out of the Corp before I re-upped, I told my parents what had happened and my dad said that as much as he appreciated what I’d done, I needed to go to you and tell you, no matter what your father did.
“I went and saw your grandmother to find out where you were and she told me that you were in New York and about to graduate from film school. She gave me your address, and I went to find you. I waited across the street from your apartment for six hours for you to get home and when you did, you were with a guy. I still wanted to talk to you. I crossed the street and when I got closer I heard you guys talking about the honeymoon you’d planned in the Bahamas after you both graduated. You were married. I was too late.”
Her hand clasped over her mouth. “I’m so sorry.”
“You don’t have to be sorry. You didn’t know.”
“I should have.” Tears were pouring down her face. “None of this ever should’ve happened. If I had stood up to my father, then you would’ve told me. This is my fault.”
“It’s not your fault.” He took two steps toward her, no longer able to keep his distance. “We were kids.”
She let out a bitter laugh. “You know what the worst part is, the reason I didn’t tell my father about you wasn’t because I didn’t want to upset him. It was because deep down, I knew he would never let us be together. I knew that if he knew about us, he would take you away from me. I didn’t know how, but I could never have imagined it would be like this. But I knew.”
Eli pulled her into his arms and she melted against him. She told him she was sorry over and over again. He held her so tight he would be scared of hurting her if not for the iron grip her arms had around him.
“Do you forgive me?” he cut off her hundredth apology.
Her head tilted back. “Me forgive you? Do you forgive me?”
Fire and Love (Hope Falls Book 13) Page 19