by Marta Perry
That was her defense, and she could do no more. She felt a little surprised that the words had come out so easily. She expected more questions from Bishop Mose, but he turned instead to Nathan.
“Nathan, is Naomi’s account of what happened correct?”
“Ja.” The word sounded as if it had been chipped from a block of ice. “Sadie started to cough. It was a terrible sound, like she was choking. I didn’t know what to do, but Naomi did.” Nathan kept his eyes focused on the bishop. “If she hadn’t been there, I don’t know what I would have done.”
The bishop nodded, and it seemed to Naomi that a little of the tension went out of the room. “I understand that Isaiah has something to contribute.”
Isaiah, realizing that all eyes were on him, flushed. “Ja. I…We noticed that no lights were on in Naomi’s place, and she is always back by around eight at the latest. So I walked over to the farmhouse to see if everything was all right.” He seemed to run out of steam.
Naomi’s heart twisted. It was unfair that her little brother should be brought into this and forced to speak before the bishop.
“And what did you find?” Bishop Mose asked, his tone encouraging.
“Like Naomi and Nathan said.” Isaiah’s Adam’s apple bobbed. “They were in the kitchen, and Naomi had been treating Sadie with a steam tent. Like she used to treat me,” he added with a quick smile.
“You did not stay?” John Fisher asked, speaking for the first time.
Isaiah shrugged. “There was nothing for me to do, and I would have to be up early to do the milking. Besides, I knew Naomi would take gut care of the little girl.”
Bishop Mose nodded. His gaze moved from Isaiah to her. “Naomi, has there been any improper behavior between you and Nathan?”
“No.” She kept her eyes fixed on his face, feeling that he would know she was telling the truth.
He nodded, and then turned to Nathan. “Nathan, has there been anything improper in your relationship with Naomi?”
“No.” Nathan’s mouth clamped shut.
Bishop Mose nodded again. He looked around the room from one face to another. “Does anyone know how this rumor might have started?”
Silence again. Jessie’s face appeared in Naomi’s mind, but she pushed it resolutely out again. She would not cast suspicion on another without proof.
“Very well.” Bishop Mose shot a glance at John Fisher, and some wordless communication seemed to pass between them. “I am satisfied that no wrong has been committed here, save by the people who have repeated an unfounded rumor. There is no blame attached to Naomi for her actions in nursing a child in her care, nor to Nathan for allowing it. Does anyone have something to add?”
Daad slapped his hands on his knees, the sound sharp in the stillness. “I am not satisfied. My daughter is still the subject of rumors and slanderous talk.”
“If I can find the one who has started the rumors, that person will be brought before the congregation,” Bishop Mose said.
“And if not?” Daad’s face was red, and he ignored the placating hand Betty laid on his arm. “The talk doesn’t matter so much to Nathan. It is always the woman who carries the blame.”
“It matters to me.” Nathan was angry. She didn’t think she’d ever seen him angry, not like this, anyway. His fists were clenched, and he shot to his feet as if he couldn’t sit still for another minute. “It matters. I don’t want folks talking about Naomi any more than you do. Or talking about me, and my kinder maybe hearing about it.”
“Then do something.” Daad shot the words at him.
“All right. I will do something.” Nathan’s voice was loud in the room. “I will marry Naomi, and that will stop the rumors once and for all.”
Every eye in the room turned toward Naomi. She prayed for the floor to open up and swallow her, for an earthquake to hit, anything rather than having Nathan proposing to her out of anger and embarrassment.
They were waiting. All of them waiting for her answer.
Two things were suddenly very clear to her. She loved Nathan King with all her heart. And she could not possibly marry him, not like this.
She rose, surprised to find that her legs could hold her up. She faced Nathan.
“No,” she said clearly. “I will not marry you.” She turned and walked out, aware of the stunned silence behind her.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Naomi went back to the grossdaadi house. Where else could she go? She didn’t know, just as she didn’t know what she was going to do next.
The family wouldn’t leave her alone for long. She ought to be making plans so that she’d have something to say to them.
Naomi pressed her hands to her face, feeling tears sting her eyes. How could she have said no to Nathan right out in front of everyone?
A flicker of anger went through her. As well ask how he could have proposed marriage to her in that way. She just prayed he would not attempt to talk to her.
The back door opened, and Naomi’s breath caught in her throat. But it was Lovina, thank the good Lord. She could just about bear to talk to Lovina.
She started to rise, but Lovina reached her quickly and pushed her back down in the rocking chair.
“Sit,” she said. She pulled one of the straight chairs from the table over next to her. “And I will sit, too, unless you want to kick me out.” Her smile was a bit anxious.
Naomi shook her head. “I knew someone would come. I am glad it is you.”
Lovina’s smile became wider. “Ach, you threw the cat among the pigeons for sure when you turned Nathan down and walked out.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt him.” She pressed her fingertips to her lips for an instant, but words already spoken could not be called back.
“He’ll get over it.” Lovina’s tone didn’t promise much sympathy for Nathan. “As soon as you were gone, your daad started in again on how he’d said all along that you should have come to us, and if everyone only did what he said, we’d all be happier.”
“I’m sorry.” She’d involved them in her troubles, it seemed.
“Don’t be,” Lovina said. “I did what I should have done before. I came right out and said I wouldn’t be happier, because I didn’t want to work in the store, I wanted to stay at home and take care of my own children. And Elijah tried to shush me, but I said he was just as bad, and he knew how I felt so why didn’t he have courage enough to tell his daad.”
“Lovina, you didn’t.” Naomi, caught between laughter and tears, could only stare at her sister-in-law.
“I did. And that shut the both of them up, I can tell you. And then Nathan—”
“He’s not going to try and talk to me, is he?” Panic ripped through her. “I can’t see him now.”
“I can’t promise he won’t want to see you sometime soon, but it won’t be tonight. Betty up and told him to his face that it was no wonder you’d turned him down, the ham-handed way he went about asking you to marry him. And when Daad tried to lay blame on Nathan, she turned on him and told him that he was at fault just as much or more.”
Naomi’s head threatened to split open. “I can’t imagine— What on earth did the bishop think of all those goings-on?”
Lovina shrugged. “He just smiled. He told me to make them leave you alone for a bit. After he left, I got rid of Nathan and convinced Elijah to mind his own business. But Daad is outside waiting, and I think he won’t go home without seeing you, at least for a minute.”
Naomi might have known her father would have to have the last word. She nodded, the movement a bit shaky. “Ja, all right.”
Lovina stood, and then she bent to hug her. “You were right about the coming boppli,” she whispered. “And we stand behind you, whatever you decide to do.”
She had gone to the door before Naomi could find the words to thank her.
There was a murmur of voices, and then Daad and Betty came into the kitchen. Naomi rose, not wanting to face Daad sitting down if he was going to scold her.
But h
er father didn’t look as if he were in a scolding mood. In fact, he seemed a bit ashamed, or maybe embarrassed. Betty had to nudge him to get him started.
“Naomi, I…I hope you are all right.” He glanced at Betty, and then looked at his shoes. “I should not have spoken…carried on the way I did.”
No one could not say it didn’t matter, because it did. It had precipitated that foolish offer of marriage from Nathan, and that was no small matter.
“Denke, Daadi,” she said finally. “I appreciate it.” Even if Betty was making him apologize, she was grateful. She was sure now that she had underestimated Betty.
Daad met her gaze then. He took a step toward her, and his face worked as if emotions threatened to overcome him. “I am sorry,” he said again, his voice husky. “I should not have let a wall grow between us. You are a gut daughter, Naomi.”
A sob broke loose from her control, and she went quickly into his arms, feeling them close around her, inhaling the familiar scent of him. “Denke, Daadi,” she whispered. “I love you.”
He hugged her as if she were a small child again, and then he let her go. “Gut, gut. And if you want to komm home, you are wilkom.”
She didn’t, but she appreciated the offer more than she could say. “I must think about what I am going to do.”
Daad opened his mouth as if he planned to tell her. Then he closed it again. He nodded.
“You will tell us when you decide,” he said. “We are your family. We will stand with you, whatever the decision is.”
He edged toward the door, and Naomi suspected he would be glad to leave the emotional displays behind. She hugged Betty, whispering her thanks in Betty’s ear. Betty nodded, and in a moment they were gone.
Naomi was alone. Now she could think about what she meant to do. The only trouble was that she didn’t have any idea.
The house had been so empty when Nathan awoke that it set up lonely echoes in his heart. He’d been eager to leave it behind to come out to the barn for the morning milking. He leaned against the warm side of a cow and aimed a squirt of milk at the barn cat, who lapped it from her whiskers and then set about busily washing her face.
He couldn’t distract himself from his troubles so easily. The children were safe with his sister, for the moment. But what about when they came home? And what about Naomi?
He’d made a mess of that situation, and it was his own fault. If he hadn’t let Sam Esch make him angry, if he’d simply let the bishop handle Sam, everything would be back to normal by now.
Well, maybe not normal. Folks would still be talking, but when Bishop Mose’s attitude became known, the talk would die off.
The clop of hooves announced Daad’s arrival. At least the effort of talking to Daad might take his mind off his troubles.
“You are here early,” he said.
Daad slid the barn door closed behind him, cutting out the cold. “Ja.” He rubbed his hands together to warm them as he approached the next cow in the row. “Thought maybe you’d want to talk before Isaiah got here.”
So it looked as if there was no avoiding the subject. At least, as Daad settled on the milking stool, Nathan couldn’t see his face.
“The kinder are all right?” he asked, delaying the moment when they’d have to talk about what had happened yesterday.
“Ja, they are fine. Sarah kept them all so busy they were ready to fall into bed when the time came.” The rhythmic sound of the milk hitting the pail punctuated his words. “But soon they will ask questions. What will you tell them?”
“I don’t know.” The cow flicked her tail, maybe picking up on his edginess. “I made a mess of things, didn’t I?”
Daad grunted. “You were ferhoodled for sure, asking Naomi to marry you in that way.”
“I know, I know. I let Sam make me mad, and now I’ve hurt Naomi. If I’d just kept quiet, well, it might have been awkward for a while, but she’d be back here where she belongs.”
“I doubt she thinks she belongs here now,” Daad said, not letting him off easy.
“I was stupid. I know.”
“The women lost no time in letting you know what they thought of you, that’s certain-sure.” There might have been a smile in Daad’s voice over the way Lovina and Betty had reacted.
“At least they blamed Sam, as well,” Nathan said.
“That is not a defense for what you did.”
“I know,” he agreed hurriedly. Daad might be soft-spoken, but he never made light of it when one of his children did something wrong and tried to get out of the blame. “Naomi has been nothing but kind and generous to the kinder and to me. And in return I insulted her with that stupid proposal.”
Daad didn’t speak for a moment. Nathan heard the scrape of his milking stool, and then Daad appeared, standing there looking at him with a question in his face.
“The way you did it was stupid, that’s certain-sure. But is it such a far-fetched idea, marrying Naomi?”
Nathan opened his mouth and then shut it again. He would not admit that when he’d thought about being married to Naomi, it had seemed…what? Comforting? Right?
“I don’t think—”
The evasion he was fumbling for didn’t have to be spoken, since the barn door slid open and Isaiah came in. Daad could hardly think Nathan would talk about Naomi in front of her brother.
Isaiah unwrapped the muffler that covered his mouth. “I will take over for you, Nathan. You are needed back at the house.”
“Naomi?” He stood up so quickly he knocked the milking stool over.
Isaiah shook his head, frowning a little. “No. I have not seen her this morning. It is Jessie Miller, here already and wanting to know where the kinder are.”
Jessie. Nathan exchanged glances with Daad. What on earth was Jessie doing here this time in the morning? He shrugged. Whatever the answer, he would have to deal with it.
“Denke, Isaiah. I will go.”
When he stepped outside, the cold air smacked his face, and his feet crunched on the patches of icy snow. He heard steps behind him and turned to see Daad coming, too.
He waited until Daad caught up with him and looked a question at him, smiling a little. “Do you think I cannot handle Jessie on my own?”
Daad did not have a returning smile. “Maybe so, maybe not. But with Jessie—I think it best that you not be alone with her.”
Nathan could only stare at his father. “Why? What do you think might happen?”
Daad shrugged, his face setting in determined lines. “Jessie is unpredictable. I think maybe Naomi has been right in thinking Jessie needs help.”
Nathan turned this unexpected comment over in his mind. How many times had he made the excuses Ada had always made, ones Emma continued to make? Jessie was immature. Jessie was emotional. She just needed to grow up a bit. The familiar phrases sounded hollow.
He glanced at Daad as they reached the steps. “Are you thinking that it was Jessie who started the rumors about me and Naomi? But she couldn’t have known.”
Daad didn’t answer. He just walked up to the door and paused, letting Nathan go inside first.
The instant Nathan stepped into the kitchen, Jessie spun toward him.
“Nathan!” She reached out as if to hug him. Daad moved from behind him, and she froze. “Ezra.” She nodded toward him.
“Jessie, what are you doing here?” Nathan said. “You should not be out this early. It must not have been light yet when you left home.” He moved toward the stove, busying himself with pouring a mug of coffee for Daad.
“Why shouldn’t I be here?” She elbowed him aside. “I will do the coffee. You don’t need to bother.” She swung around with the mug so quickly that some of the coffee sloshed out. She didn’t seem to notice, handing it to Daad.
Daad nodded his thanks. Setting the mug on the table, he began taking his jacket off, moving deliberately as if announcing that he was here to stay.
Nathan tried to gather his thoughts. “I’m sure your mamm would be unhappy if
she knew you had driven out here so early. Are you going to see her today?”
Jessie shook her head, kapp strings fluttering with the movement. “I can’t go to see her. I’ll be too busy here.” She turned, hurrying over to the stove and picking up the coffeepot again. “I should make more coffee. Men need something hot when they’re working outside on such a cold day.”
Nathan seized the pot from her and set it down. “That is ser kind of you, but I don’t want coffee. What do you mean, you’ll be busy here?”
“Watching the kinder, of course.” She grabbed a dishcloth and began rubbing it over the counter as if she’d wear right through the surface. “Cooking and cleaning and taking care of you and the kinder. That’s what Ada would have wanted. Where are Joshua and Sadie? I want to see them.” She dropped the cloth as quickly as she’d picked it up.
Nathan felt as if his wits had slowed to molasses. What was she going on about? “The kinder are with my sister, Sarah. They’re fine. You’ll have to see them some other time.”
“But I want them to be here. This is where they belong.” She spun again, her quick movements making him dizzy, and he longed for Naomi’s calm, serene presence. “I’ll go and bring them home.”
“No.” He caught her wrists to keep her from bolting out the door and then let her go just as quickly when she leaned toward him. “I want my children to be just where they are, do you understand, Jessie? Now calm down and tell me what you are talking about.”
She looked at him as if he were being dense. Maybe he was. Naomi had tried to warn him, and he hadn’t listened.
“Naomi isn’t going to be around here anymore. She won’t be trying to take Ada’s place. But you can count on me. I will take gut care of you and the children.”
Nathan’s stomach twisted. “No, Jessie. You will not be caring for the kinder. Do you understand what I am saying?”
She stared at him, anger flashing in her eyes. “Naomi has turned you against me. I should have known she would.”