“I’m really not that complicated,” I tell him.
“You are,” Bass says. “But that’s okay, because I think you’re going to be worth the effort.”
“I hope that’s a compliment.”
“It is,” he says. “We should get back before your dad sends the firing squad.”
We both take off walking back to the house. And, while part of me feels like what Sebastian said was a joke, part of me realizes it’s true. My dad would send a firing squad to find me. It doesn’t scare me though. It feels good to be so loved.
Such a girl.
“If there is twenty feet or more between you and the perpetrator, what do you do?” Dad asks me later that night.
I'm apparently supposed to be learning how to handle myself in certain types of situation. The problem is I'm clueless about this stuff. It's not exactly something they taught me in my Floridian public high school.
“Uh, run,” I answer.
“Wrong,” Dad says.
“Why is that wrong?”
“If you run, they could pull a gun out and shoot you.”
I nod, like I understand, but I don't. I've been shot at once in my life, and that was when Sebastian and I jumped from that two story window. That was the scariest experience of my life. Maybe even more than the night Gage was shot.
“So, what do I do?” I ask.
“You shoot them,” Dad says.
“But I don't want to hurt anybody,” I say.
I hear a lot of responses from the guys, who are all currently sitting in on my session. Most of them sound annoyed with my answer. I ignore them, because I am honestly trying to learn.
“Serenity, you don't shoot to injure. You shoot to kill,” Dad says.
Which makes me gasp. “Dad, I'm not killing anybody. Or shooting anybody.”
“It's you or them.”
“I don't like this scenario,” I say. “How is it fair of me to say that my life is worth more than somebody else's?”
“Your life is always worth more,” Dad says.
“You say that because you're my dad. But their dad might feel differently.”
“I'm not your dad, but I agree with him,” Gage says. “You're always worth more.”
I look over at Gage. He's sitting in a recliner with his feet up. There is an IV stand beside him, reminding me just how close to death he really came.
“I would kill somebody to save you,” I tell my dad. “Or Gage. Or Jaxon. Or Sebastian. Or anybody in this room right now.”
“Well, that's a start at least,” Dad says. “We've just got to work on your sense of self preservation.”
“Dad, I've survived a lot of horrible situations,” I say. “I'm not as weak as I look.”
But he ignores me. “Sebastian, how did she do today on your run?”
“She didn't even make it to the half mile mark before she had to stop,” Bass answers. “It was kind of horrible, actually.”
“Do it again tomorrow,” Dad says. “I would also like to start gun training tomorrow.”
Yay.
Guns...
Literally, that is going to be my least favorite part.
“Brett, I'd like you to help her learn Swiss German,” Dad says. “And Bass, you're going to be her chaperone. I don't want her alone with any of the guys.”
Which makes me roll my eyes.
“Who is going to chaperone her and Bass when they're running?” Sander asks.
“They're fine,” Dad says.
Sander looks at me. “I don't know. I think if you should be worried about anybody, it's her and Bass.”
“I'm sitting right here,” Bass says. “I can talk for myself.”
“And what do you have to say for yourself?” Jaxon asks.
“One, I'm seventeen. Two, I am focused on Spy School and my future,” Sebastian says. “My job right now is to train Serenity and keep her safe. I'm here to do my job. Period. There is nothing more to it.”
I'm just a job to Bass.
And I know that.
But his words still hurt.
I'm such a girl.
“You know, I think I've had enough for one day,” I say, getting up. I walk towards my room. Mostly because I don't want all the guys to see me cry. Or my dad.
I hate that Bass can hurt my feelings so easily. I hate that I let him have this power.
I shut my bedroom door and lock it behind me. I doubt locking it will keep anybody out, but I feel better with it locked. I lie down on my bed and allow myself to cry. Not just because of Bass, though that is plenty enough reason to cry. It's just everything. All the traveling, all the running... all the fighting... I’m tired, and it’s all piling up. I just wish I could get used to it all, and for it to feel normal.
There is a knock on my door.
Of course.
“Go away,” I say, trying not to sound like I'm crying.
“Serenity, open up,” Hunter says from the other side.
Hunter hasn't done anything to piss me off today, so I get up and let him in. I close the door and lock it behind him. If my dad finds out, chaos will break out in this house. But Hunter and I have a completely platonic relationship. I wish my dad could see that.
“Are you okay?” Hunter asks, sitting on the bed beside me.
I just shrug, wiping some tears from my cheeks. “I'm so stupid.”
“No, you're not. Sebastian is,” Hunter says.
Which makes me smile. Just a little. “I mean, he kind of is.”
But not all.
Sebastian is one of the smartest people I've ever met.
“You like him, huh?”
I nod. “I don't want to. But I kinda do.”
“You know, when I first met you I knew you'd probably, eventually, date somebody at Spy School, but I've got to be honest... out of every person I could've imagined you dating, Bass is not even close to making the list,” Hunter says. “On paper, you two seem like complete opposites.”
“Because we are completely opposite,” I say. “And there is no way that he would ever see me as anything more than a job.”
“Opposites attract.”
“Attraction is a such a small part of a much larger picture,” I say. “You can't have a relationship with somebody just because you're attracted to them.”
“How are you so much smarter than me?” Hunter asks. “I suck at relationships.”
“I've never had a relationship. So I can’t be smarter than you when it comes to relationships.”
“I think you and Bass will work this out and eventually date,” Hunter says.
“Why?” I ask. “I don't have anything to offer. I'm not pretty. I'm not strong. I can't run or shoot a gun or speak five different languages. I'm too skinny and probably need years of therapy to be normal.”
“You're pretty,” Hunter says. “I know Sebastian is attracted to you. And strong isn't just physical. It's emotional, too. And you're one of the strongest people I've ever met. You'll learn to run, shoot a gun, and speak a new language. You've been gaining weight, so you won't be so tiny forever. And, to be completely honest, we all need therapy at Spy School.”
Hunter makes me smile.
“What messed up relationship do you have?” I ask him. “Or have you had?”
“Ah, well, I'm kind of dating somebody. Though not really,” Hunter says. “She wants to date me, but how can I when I'm literally on the other side of the world?”
“She's still in school?” I ask.
“She's a senior,” he says.
“Maybe you should give the long distance thing a shot,” I say, pulling my feet off the floor and crossing them. “I mean, you can go home for the important things, right? Like prom and birthdays?”
Hunter laughs. “Karlie, we go to Spy School. There isn't prom.”
“Oh,” I say. “Well, that doesn’t mean you can’t dance with her anyway, right?”
“I guess I could make time to visit,” he says.
“Maybe you should gi
ve it a shot then,” I say. “Just a trial run.”
“Maybe,” Hunter says. “What about you? What are you going to do about Bass?”
“Learn how to kick his butt in a fight,” I say. “Pretend that I definitely don't have feelings for him. Try not to cry every time he hurts my feelings, because then I would pretty much be crying all the time.”
“I like the kicking his butt part. But the rest of your plan sucks,” he says.
“Well, that is what I have to do until I figure something else out,” I say.
There is a knock on the door.
“What?” I yell at the closed door.
“You have ten seconds to open this door before I bust it down,” I hear dad yell from the other side.
I don't doubt his words, so I quickly get up and unlock the door.
“If there is a boy in your room, this door stays open,” Dad says.
“I know. Sorry,” I say.
“Have you been crying?”
“What? No. Of course not,” I say, wiping at my face.
“Did you make her cry?” Dad asks Hunter.
“Wasn't me,” Hunter says, holding up both hands.
Dad looks at me. “Who made you cry?”
“It's not important,” I say.
He gives me a look before turning towards the living room. I hear his voice echo through the house.
“Everybody in the living room! Now!”
I give Hunter a panicked look.
Is my dad seriously doing this right now?
Forced friendship.
Hunter and I both walk toward the living room. We get in there last. All the other guys are already there. Gage is still in the recliner from earlier. He's finished his IV drip, which is good, but he still looks so pale.
“I want to know which one of you made my daughter cry,” Dad says. “And I want to know now.”
I look up and see Sander smirking.
Seriously, Sander?
“This ought to be good,” Sander says.
“Dad, can you just not?” I ask him. “Please.”
“Was it you, Sander?”
“Nope,” he answers.
Dad looks at me.
“No, it wasn't Sander,” I say. “But can't you drop it? Let's just call it teenage girl hormones and leave it at that.”
“Gage?” Dad asks, then shakes his head. “You've hardly been out of that chair today. Don't suppose it was you.”
“Not me,” Gage says.
“And it wasn't Hunter,” Dad says. “Jaxon?” Nope. “Brett?”
“Uh, not that I know of,” Brett says
“Dad, please stop,” I say.
But he doesn't stop.
“Sebastian,” Dad says.
And the room falls silent.
Great.
“Everybody but Sebastian and my daughter, out of the room,” Dad says.
I hear a couple of guys snickering.
I also see Gage struggling to get up.
“Dad, don't make Gage leave,” I say.
But it's too late.
The guys are already helping him get up.
I hate watching him struggle as he leaves the room.
Once everybody is cleared out, my dad looks at me.
“Okay, why did Bass make you cry?”
“I didn't say it was him,” I say. “Why can't I just cry without it being somebody's fault?”
Dad looks at Bass. “You want to explain to me what you did to make my daughter cry?”
Sebastian shrugs. “Why do you think I can understand the female brain?”
“Fine. Sebastian, out,” Dad says. “I want to talk to my daughter alone.”
Sebastian doesn't waste any time. He just takes the opportunity and runs. Like, literally runs. Not that I blame him. If I could, I would run, too.
Dad sits down on the couch and pats the spot beside him. I take a seat there, nervous to see what he’s going to say.
“Serenity, I know that you haven't known me very long, but I have loved you since before you were born,” Dad says. “I woke at midnight to feed you many times, and I changed your diaper.”
Really? That's his argument? He changed my diaper?
“You don't have to hide things from me,” Dad says.
“It's stupid.”
“Wait, do you like Sebastian?” Dad asks, and I know exactly what he means when he says it.
“I just kind of have a crush on Bass, but he doesn't feel the same way about me. It's not a big deal,” I say.
“Wait, I thought you liked Sander,” Dad says.
“What? Why would you think that?” I ask.
“I don't know. You two just seem to get along well,” he says.
“Well, Sander is just a friend.”
“Are you sure Bass doesn't like you?” Dad asks.
“Pretty sure,” I answer.
With that, Dad gets up, leaving me on the couch. I guess that's the end of that conversation. At least it didn't get awkward. Well, maybe a little awkward. I don't even know what I'm going to tell Bass the next time I see him. But I'll think of something later.
I lean back on the couch and think about how crazy my life has been. I've literally been in three different countries in the past week. Which is crazy.
Now, here I am, training at Spy School. Well, not Spy School, because apparently it's not safe for me to be there. But I am training with the best Spy School has to offer. It's crazy to be a part of a secret society like this. Especially considering my dad is the one who runs it.
A few minutes later, I hear footsteps coming into the living room and I look up to see Bass.
“I'm sorry that I made you cry,” Sebastian says, taking a seat beside me.
“Don't worry about it,” I say. “I mean, it wasn't really you. It was stupid. Sorry if you got in trouble with my dad.”
“I didn't get in trouble. He just said if I made you cry again, he would crush me like the bug I am,” Sebastian says. “And that was a direct quote.”
“Is that all he said?” I ask.
“That and he said I should be nice to you, because apparently he doesn't think I'm nice enough to you.”
I resist the urge to cover my face with my hands. “Don't listen to him. I don't want my dad to force you to be friends with me.”
“He doesn’t have to force me to be friends with you, S,” Bass says. “We’re already friends. Or at least, I thought we were. Maybe I am kind of hard on you sometimes, but I just want you to be safe. Always. That’s my number one priority.”
“Really?” I ask. “Like, you really like me, and not because my dad threatened you.”
“Honestly, I told you, I’ve pretty much always liked you,” he says. “Well, since the training room. I hated you when I saw you sitting in my desk, but that probably had more to do with the fact that Nolan was standing beside you.”
Which makes me frown.
How do I still miss Nolan?
“Sorry. I know you hate it when we mention his name.”
I nod. “He was my friend. Sometimes I have a hard time dealing with the fact that he... you know.”
Shot Gage.
And almost kidnapped me.
Who knows where I would be without Sebastian saving me.
“You should go get some sleep,” Bass says. “You’ve got a lot of work to do tomorrow. Your dad is going to make you train really hard.”
“Okay,” I say. “Goodnight, Sebastian.”
“Night, S.”
Wednesday, August 30
Gun training.
My hand is literally shaking as I hold up the gun. It’s pointed at the target, but I’m too scared to pull the trigger.
“You’ve never going to hit the target like that,” Jaxon says.
“I don’t know how to do this,” I say.
This isn’t the first time I’ve shot a gun. In fact, I took a class on this in Spy School. But today is different. Maybe because Nolan was with me at my first class. He was the one training m
e. Or maybe it’s because I’ve seen just how much damage a gun can do.
“Look right through here,” Jax says, pointing to a spot on the gun. “Close one eye and try to line the dot up with where you want to shoot.”
I have no idea what he’s talking about, but I try it.
Oh.
I see now.
I aim the gun at the target, but my hand is still shaking, so I bring up my other hand to help steady it.
And then I pull the trigger.
I completely miss the target.
“It’s okay,” Jax says. “Go ahead and empty the clip.”
“Empty the clip?”
“Shoot until you’re out of bullets,” he says.
And so I do. One of my shots manages to get really close to the center, but the other ones are kind of embarrassing.
“I suck at this whole spy thing,” I say, kind of wanting to cry again, but I refuse to. I don’t want to be weak.
Jax takes the gun from me. “When Hunter was learning how to shoot, he literally shot himself in the foot. Of course, he was ten and it was a BB gun, but it was still hilarious. I like to remind him to this day. Don’t be discouraged by this. You will learn. I promise.”
“I just don’t know what I’m doing,” I say. “I keep messing everything up. And I can’t run. Bass slows down for me. And I can tell he always wants to run longer... farther. I’m holding him back. I’m holding all you guys back.”
“We knew exactly what we were signing up for when we came here,” Jax says. “Your dad didn’t just invite us to protect you. He wanted us to train you. The thing is you’re just starting out in your training. The rest of us have been doing stuff like this since we were born. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
“Yeah,” I say, letting out a sigh.
I still don’t like it.
“So, how did you manage to convince your dad to not have a chaperone?” he asks. “I figured somebody would be out here with us.”
“Pretty much, I told my dad that I have a crush on Sebastian,” I say. “Not in so many words, but he figured it out. Which makes me even more lame. How many of you guys know? Hunter knew, so I assume you all do.”
Keeping Me (Spy Chronicles Book 2) Page 8