“I thought I had lost you,” I admit, too.
“I saw you. I closed my eyes and you were with me.”
I have to swallow hard to lose the lump in my throat. My chest tightens with an unbearable ache. I can’t imagine how she felt or what she went through. But hearing that I was with her makes my heart swell. It’s a foreign feeling, like nothing I’ve ever known before. I feel it all the way in the pit of my stomach. I wrap her in my arms, pulling her into my chest.
“I love you.” The words take on a life of their own, forcing their way from my heart into my throat then across my lips and to her ears.
Her tears stain my chest. Why is she crying?
“You can’t.”
I don’t have a choice. I already do.
“Unfortunately, love, this is one thing you don’t get to decide.”
“I know,” she whispers, “because I love you too.”
“Then why are you crying?”
“Because don’t you see? This is a mess. All of it. I never meant to bring you into this. All I ever do is hurt people. It shouldn’t be this hard, this complicated.” Her voice is frantic, and it’s heartbreaking to think she feels she doesn’t deserve to be loved.
“Love isn’t always beautiful. Sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes it’s complicated. Sometimes it’s senseless and even a little fucking crazy. You’ll wake up some mornings and you’ll want to quit. But you won’t. You can’t. Because even when it feels like you’re wandering through the forest, you still manage to find yourself. Alive. Redeemed. And you can’t go back to the way you were. No, babygirl, this is the new you. And you are the woman I love.”
“You were worth it,” she whispers against my skin.
“What’s that, love?”
“The wait.”
Emma
If someone had asked me eight months ago where I’d be this Christmas, I’d have told them I’d be doing the same thing I always do- picking up a pre-cooked ham because Bastain never liked the way I made mine, then crying over sappy Hallmark movies while he drinks the night away. We never put up a tree because he never felt like celebrating. So, naturally the first thing I begged Alex to do was take a trip to a tree farm.
“We should get two, one for each of our places,” I suggest.
After the accident, Alex begged me to stop being stubborn and move in with him. I know he was just being concerned, but then more than ever, I needed to do this on my own. They arrested Bastain for violating his restraining order. Someone spotted him at the hospital and reported him. Once they had his prints and mugshot, they were able to place him in the white truck from the parking garage. After his 6-month sentence, he’ll transfer to a halfway house where he will get the psychiatric help he needs. By then, I hope to be as far away from Miami as possible.
I took advantage of Bastain’s absence and brought Alex to the tree where Gatsby is buried. He held me while I cried, letting those demons go, too. I told Gatsby thank you. Thank you for being everything I needed him to be when I needed it. Then I told him goodbye.
With Bastain out of the picture, I could finally be… me. The way I was truly meant to be. I needed to prove to myself I could do it, not out of fear, but out of will. And I have. Mr. King and the rest of the staff at Cameron Inc. were all very supportive during my recovery. He apologized at least a dozen times for not answering the security company’s call. I assured him there was no need for guilt. Bastain was determined. It would have happened sooner or later.
Alex added security cameras in my apartment for safe measure. I think he really did it so he can watch me shower on the nights he’s not there with me. Sometimes I toy with him, making myself come when I know he’s watching.
“Or we could just get one and put it at mine. So you’d have to spend your all your nights there so you don’t miss it,” he hints. He’s relentless.
He’s been overwhelmed with work lately, so he hasn’t had as much time at the gym. I see the sadness in his eyes when he has to pass a class to Jake. I know he misses it, and I wish I could help.
“We’ll take two of these,” I tell the young guy as he walks by. Alex huffs an exasperated sigh, knowing he has no choice.
The smell of fresh pine fills my apartment from the moment we place the big tree. I am giddy with excitement as I fire up the bluetooth speaker, blasting Christmas music throughout. I throw a batch of macadamia nut cookies in the oven while we unpack the decorations we just bought. Alex watches in amusement as I dance around the living room, singing along with my favorite songs.
He helps me string the lights then we take turn hanging ornaments. The timer dings, and I move to grab the cookies. Alex wraps an arm around my waist, spinning me around to face him. “Do you have any idea how much I love you, Emma McClain?” he says, his eyes alive with emotion as he looks into mine.
“Hopefully half as much as I love you, Nathan Alexander.”
He still cringes when I use his given name, but it doesn’t keep me from doing it. I’ve made it my mission to bridge the gap between father and son. Alex deserves his father’s love, and I won’t stop until he feels it. I met the man three months ago when Alex brought me to his home, New Orleans. The heartache and regret in his eyes when he saw his son brought tears to my eyes. I’ve been fortunate enough to have amazing parents, and sometimes I take for granted that’s not always the case. But, it’s never too late. Until it is. And I know Mr. Alexander wants a relationship with his son. I can feel it. Maybe if we just spent more time with him I could get Alex to feel it too.
I fell in love with the city the moment my feet hit the pavement. He took me by his old office, and his old loft. We walked the French Quarter and he fed me the most delicious food I’ve ever tasted. His step was lighter and his smile a little wider the whole time we were there. And that made my heart smile.
We stumbled upon a building for lease, and I told him it would make a great gym. He just sighed and kept walking, but I can’t help but wonder if sometimes when he’s lying in bed with me at night, staring into the open air, if he’s not wondering… what if?
“You should hang this one.” Alex reaches in his pocket and pulls out a clear glass ornament with a navy-blue ribbon. The inside is filled with tiny snowflakes and… a ring. The most gorgeous diamond ring I’ve ever seen.
My heart falls to my stomach and my knees get weak. I blink back tears as I fight to steady my breath. My hand covers my mouth, holding back the scream that’s working its way up my throat.
His face illuminates with his smile, from his adorable dimples to his chocolate eyes as he watches my reaction. He spins the ornament around, revealing the message. “Marry me.” and underneath that, “Please.”
He’s so fucking adorable. Always the gentleman. My heart dances with joy.
“I can’t spend another night without you. You have taken root in my very soul. I’d like to say I’ve been waiting my whole life for a woman like you, but the truth is, I never saw you coming.” I move my hand to the curve of his jaw. “Say yes, Emma. Say you’ll be mine.”
I lean up on the tips of my toes, my mouth hovering just above his. I can already feel the heat radiating from his body. “Yes,” I breathe, my lips brushing his when I speak. “I’ll marry you, Alex. But we both know I’ve always been yours.”
Two months later…
I did some research and discovered Cameron Inc. has a field office in New Orleans. I also called about the building for lease to see if it was still available. Even though I gave Alex a hard time about needing my space, the reality is, I missed him when he wasn’t here. It took some convincing- okay not much convincing… More like fifteen minutes with the pearl necklace and some heels… and Alex was all over the idea of moving back to the city he loves. His face lit up when I mentioned having his own gym. So, here we are, loading up the Uhaul, getting ready to start the rest of our life together. And I think to myself, this is it. This is what happiness feels like.
The End
For those new to he
r work, Delaney Foster is a native of the deep bayous of sweet Louisiana, not far from New Orleans. Where eating, drinking, and dancing are pretty much a requirement for citizenship. She loves all things romance, a good glass of wine, and Saturdays at the baseball park. She does believe leggings are pants and is a bit of a book whore. In her heart, Mr. Darcy will always be the ultimate book boyfriend. And in her books, you will find sexy alpha males and the strong women who love them.
The Perfect Gentleman is Delaney’s fifth release. She currently has two series’ available in ebook format and paperback. Look for more coming soon!
Read the books that started it all for Nick and Heidi, and see why we all fell in love with Alex to begin with in:
A Woman’s Touch (book one) and
A Man’s World (book two)
Or follow Makenna and Callisto in to a world of darkness and sin in Sin with Me and Sin with Me: Penance.
Get your fix on all things Delaney by following her Amazon author page, her BookBub, or on social media.
Like what you read? Delaney loves stalkers! Drop her a message and let her know!
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The Perfect Gentleman Page 16