by S. M. McCoy
“Stay with me.”
Queasiness overcame my body. Rejecting…life. How was that possible? It was in our genes, the will to survive.
I needed to survive. And I could see something I’d never seen before. A castle strong hold stood in the background of a massive battle. People in robes, leathers, and some I couldn’t even describe fought against creatures of shadow. I’d never seen them before, their faces hidden, but I knew them… I would know them.
“Follow the moon.” The voice spoke to me and for the first time said something completely different than before. Her voice was delicate, and I reached for her, seeing the moon in my mind.
“Follow the moon my little star. This has already passed before. You are not dying, something is awakening inside of you. I’m so sorry to put this burden on you. It was the only way. You will stop the return of the Blood Wars. The Moon Goddess weeps for her people; they have twisted her words.”
Who are you? I felt like sinking into the sands, letting them take over my destiny. This was different than anything the Dragon could have ever said to me. This felt different than following a prophecy; this felt like saying screw you to the fates that put me here. This felt like the loophole my father had talked about. Nobody wanted me to stop the Blood Wars. I was the thorn in their side that should have died a long time ago.
I was the thing my dad died to protect. I was the thing that my mom sacrificed her freedom for.
I knew it was strange to think that way, but it felt right. Like many people had sacrificed themselves to make this loophole possible for me to live. I knew I had to live.
“Follow the moon, I am waiting.”
“Her pulse is dropping… Clear! Clear!”
Then I saw her. It had to be her.
It was a shadow, her hair whishing behind an old wooden door. But I felt it.
My mom. It had to be her.
“She’s waking up.” It’d been dark for so long.
I felt the blood pulsing in my veins, the pain coursing through my limbs, and I welcomed it. Like a bitter wine as it warmed my body with striking force, and I waited for the sharp to smooth as the sweet aftertaste would soothe my nerves.
Minutes passed by in silent agony as I waited for relief.
Bitter, to the end.
How sweet if only the piercing pain through my chest would cease. Each pump deliberately searing like tiny needles continuously rioting through its corridors.
A hand squeezed mine as urgently as I clung to the bed sheets at my sides—as if we both depended on it. My mind begged to call out for Aislin, but my voice remained silent. Trapped in thought, my call unheard.
“I am here.”
A drop of warm water slid down my clenched fist followed by another, the first sign of rain before a storm. What storm was looming my way?
First the overcast then the scattered tears from the clouds warned the wanderers to prepare for the coming showers. Like the weatherman predicted the elements, so must I predict for life’s surprises. When predicting for life, the passages available are veiled in mist. Sometimes in order to prepare for a storm the only option was to leap into the closest cave and hope it’s empty, because you never know if you’re walking into the belly of a whale.
“You will survive.”
I opened my eyes to the harsh air and Aislin’s tear-drenched face looking at me.
Searching.
“Aislin…” Oxygen burned my lungs, making my voice hoarse.
“Shhh. I will explain. No need to speak.” She reached for a cup of water and placed it at my lips. The cool liquid drizzled down my throat and like the desert sand I could feel the water disappear as if I had nothing at all. Replacing the cup to the table she then placed her finger to my lips. A preemptive measure to prevent me from speaking, which she was correct in assuming I would do.
“Your heart was beating so slow, it wasn’t enough to circulate oxygen through your system. You were suffocating, and your heart was failing. I couldn’t stop them from taking you.”
“Was…” I could still feel it pumping and every pulse painfully reminded me that I lived.
“I was regulating your body with my energy. It’s the best I could do, but that’s not what you’re feeling right now.”
I had an overwhelming feeling washing over me as if I was drowning. My lungs were filling and suffocating. She grabbed both my hands in comfort and possibly in restraint.
I felt tubes in my nose forcing air into me, and pain in my chest where there was a box protruding from under my skin, a pacemaker.
“Why?”
“Your mind and body are in contradiction. Out of sync. One says you don’t need to breathe or have your heart beat and the other says you do.”
Just now it made sense.
Perfect sense.
Aislin loosened her grip in the realization. She tucked my hair behind my ear and grazed down the nap of my neck. As her fingers brushed over my scars, she retracted quickly to take up my hands in hers again.
“But that’s not how the movies go…” I joked realizing where I was… the sterile walls of a hospital room stared back at me.
“No, but is real life ever like the movies?” She tucked the blankets around me. “Your mind is what is telling your body you don’t need to breathe or pump blood. So, something has changed in your mind to prepare for the transformation. But your body isn’t transforming; it still needs oxygen and nutrients.
“It’s almost like an embedded way of preventing overpopulation of serpents. You get infected, but you don’t transform then your mind forces your body to die unwillingly. So, if you had told someone they would think you’re delirious from being sickly. It’s the perfect setup…” She paused and winced. “I am so sorry. Damien told me most people don’t ever survive a transformation and he doesn’t really know what to expect, since he was born the way he was. I’m keeping you alive the best I can—he said energy can keep you going, hopefully long enough for you to fully transform, but until then you have science on your side too.”
She looked down at our tangled fingers and leaned in closer. “That’s only one theory. The other is that Cerise said a hybrid has never survived with two combatting powers. You just have to choose a path. Divine power, or serpent power.” She said this in a hushed tone like someone would be listening.
I didn’t need a cure, and my mom said something was awakening in me. Choking, I laughed, feeling the pain of my lungs and the ache of my dying heart. I wasn’t dying, and I believed her.
“Chrys, this isn’t funny. The only cure is to choose a path and embrace it fully. The more you embrace either one will be what either fights the infection or lets it spread.”
Pain rippled over her face. As she opened her eyes I knew the look entirely. It was the expression that must have crossed my face several times this day alone. It was searing. It was the battle of survival, the perseverance through pain.
To feel what I felt was truly a curse.
“We are connected on a very deep level right now.” Her eyes watered as she slowly sat down beside me. “I almost lost you, and I have no idea what brought you back, because I had given you everything I could think of, forcing my energy into your body to extend your life.”
“Are you in pain? Aislin…”
“Eventually you’ll process the energy and it will become solely yours, but for now I feel what you feel and pick up on thoughts that you have.”
“But I cannot sense your thoughts.”
“You had no energy to exchange with me; it’s a one-sided connection. My energy is the conduit and I have majority control of it. You can…”
Sense my thoughts through your mind if I consciously open that channel with my energy.
“So, my aura is scattered with your energy as its superglue?”
“So to speak, yes. But the energy will convert to completely yours. It’s a process. Eventually we won’t have this connection unless we exchange energy again. You remember when I showed you your aura?”<
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“Yes.”
“When we connected in our minds we were slowly trading energy, the both of us. It was a small equal exchange of energy through our hands. This is the same thing but on a larger scale.”
I remember that night, and it had come true so soon. I thought I had more time. But at least now I knew that it had nothing to do with actually dying, just the start of a different life.
“The waning crescent…”
“Shhh, it’s not your time. We’ll figure it out together. Plus, with the Blood Moon Ring we can save you.” She smiled at me, and I was inundated by a rolling wave of warmth.
Soft and gentle as it lapped at the sandy surface. I am the sand. Aislin, then, the warm wave of water—without her I would fall apart. Coarse grain slipping through fingers separating, falling. The water gave me structure and form, so her hands could form me once more. I was the sand meant to be washed away, but instead she pulled me together.
For a moment, I forgot about the pain, like glass shredding within my veins.
“Are you in control of your energy within me?”
“No, you are the sole controller. I have no control over your thoughts or what you do. I am only participating from a distance. I feel what you feel, hear some of your thoughts. If you think about it…”
“I am the one invading you by controlling your energy?”
“Exactly. Sometimes it’s hard to think of my own thoughts when yours are the ones floating through my skull and what you feel painfully taking its toll through my body. But I smile because we will get through it together. And I believe you. You have a much bigger purpose than fighting serpents with me…I heard the voice. We have to go to her.” With her thumb she caught a fallen tear from my face.
Like an angel she smiled at me, sharing my lot in life. I hadn’t done anything to deserve such devotion and love from another being let alone an angel. Her short hair was tossed like early morning with her extensions gathered in a loose side ponytail. Her face was blotched and puffy from crying, but she glowed as any angel would. Please don’t drift away.
“You don’t remember.”
“I’ve been missing a lot of time lately. The last thing I remember is a strange, big-muscled Asian with a dragon tattoo. Something happened to my memories, they’re all scattered.”
“Most likely your memories are transitioning.”
“Aislin we have to get out of here.”
She looked at me incredulously. “You’re in no shape right now, and this house is heavily protected.”
Seemed only natural that she should think I was insane. An injured bird leaving the nest was only looking for trouble. But in my case, it was answers.
“Answers?” Again, she caught a portion of my thoughts but not enough to understand. I had to go whether my angel followed me or not.
A hospital wasn’t going to stop a beast from acquiring its feast. This bed was a platter and I would not wait upon it for danger to devour me. The Council would be after me now. I may have only remembered some things, but I remembered my mom. The Council would know she contacted me, they would send someone else with Damien’s failure to bring in the anomaly. I wasn’t the only anomaly…
Victor. I asked Aislin to find him.
“I did what I could for Victor.”
“He’s all right?”
“Yes, he’s fine. Cerise released him…I made it just in time. He’s the one that brought me back, so fast. Though, we’ve lost the silver chariot.” That was Aislin trying to keep things lighter.
“Poor beast was one duct taped incident away from the scrap yard.” I tried to smile as best I could. The dying Mazda had a good run.
“Hey, that Lamborghini had a lot of spunk left in him. I doubt Cerise would keep it on her property for long before having it towed away. It isn’t worth the impound lot fee to get it back.” Aislin forced a laugh.
“No, she doesn’t seem like the type.” The only thing she was hanging on to was Damien. I could feel it, that Damien was hiding something. Something more than just using me for living beyond his time. There were so many uncertainties to bonding with him that either one of us could die.
I wasn’t the only one.
“Danger! Talk to me, what danger?” She snapped her fingers at me and my thoughts were collected.
I blinked and looked at her to respond.
“We need to leave. I don’t know how I know, but I know the Council knows where we are. We can’t stay here. Damien failed to bring me in; the next one wouldn’t choose me over duty.”
“He…”
“Damien…” My hand drifted to my neck like a reflex at the sound of his name. I blamed him for forcing Victor’s hand. How would he know Cerise without Damien? We wouldn’t, and now Victor was in trouble.
“What haven’t you told me?” I asked.
“Victor…he isn’t the same.” She squeezed my hands tight and her face scrunched up, feeling the sudden flood gates of worry radiate off of me.
“He’s alive…right?”
“He’s alive.” She nodded. “He’s outside on the porch.”
“I have to go.” I struggled to lift myself from the bed, ripping the tubes from my nose. My eyes begged her. Acquiescing, she helped me to my feet.
“I will come find you,” She whispered under her breath as she stood up, a renewed determination stiffening her muscles. I didn’t know it then, but she must have, that this would be the last time I saw her in this world.
“I am not looking to die,” I reassured her.
Smiling, she threw herself at me, taking me into the biggest bear hug and pressing as much of her energy into me as she could afford to lose. It warmed my insides to the core. I knew what she was doing for me. She was letting me go, knowing I was leaving.
“Remember, you will be cured or I will haunt you.”
“Well, if it’s you I’m not sure if that’s a very good threat. I believe I would like having you haunt me for all eternity.” I smiled then grabbed at my chest.
As if my blood was on fire, my veins burned with striking intensity. I had been content with the continual needle sensations up to this point but there was nothing constant about this surge of searing flesh. Like a waterfall, the consistency of its flow numbed the surrounding area and calmed its observation, but as its pressure increased or spiked in the slightest a renewed sensation occurred. In my case, a sensation of agony coursed through my body, but like any disruption, it would stabilize, rendering the pain bearable and observation would, again, calm.
“Calm…when you’re in pain?!” Her eyes watery and her hand clutching her chest as I did mine, she felt exactly what I felt—and that fact alone made me wish for the calm to take affect soon. The sooner I took control and ignored the signals firing from nerve to nerve, the sooner it would be only one person in pain instead of two.
“I am not in pain. It’s over; a flare up.”
I needed to think of other thoughts. Happy, pain-free thoughts. Aislin was connected to my feelings and thoughts. If I focused those on other things besides the physical pain she would feel only warmth, only calm.
“Victor said he’d wait outside for you, to make sure Damien didn’t come back. But Damien was the one who took you back to me to save you… What are you going to do?” Aislin adjusted herself on the bed.
Damien was waiting for me. He was a warrior of the Council; all he had to do was take me to them. He knew where they were, but then they’d know who I was. I had no idea what they’d done to my mother, let alone what they would do with me. Would they help me knowing who I am?
Those violet eyes, intense yet soft as they looked into mine. I remembered only pieces of him and yet the feelings stirring within me seemed so much deeper than I could describe. And I remembered how he controlled Cerise—maybe that’s what I was feeling now for him? It’s like walking through a place you’ve never been before, and a waft of familiar smells tickled the senses renewing the feeling, but all I could remember was the feeling and not the memo
ry…not the why. Why did I feel like there was a deep-seated connection between us?
I remembered the first time we met staring at the stars.
I remembered our first kiss in the forest.
But I didn’t remember anything about him. All I knew was the feeling and nothing about the reasons why I felt that way. Why? Damien… It was like these feelings and pictures in my mind were fabricated.
Just the thought of him brought warmth to my thoughts, but also equal parts distress.
So much distress.
Crystal. My name vibrated through my head. Anguished, the voice faded.
“Aislin, it’s okay.”
“You need to leave. Something terrible is coming.” It was in the air, I could hear her say in my mind.
“Victor is fast enough—quickly.”
I looked back once more to see Aislin shooing me with her hand and in her mind she reminded me, “Don’t forget to breathe.” I chuckled initially until I realized she was right. Every time I felt the sensation of drowning I had to suck in air like I was preparing to swim underwater. Because that’s how it was like now, the world was an ocean and I needed to remember to come up for air.
“Ooof.” I didn’t make it very far down the hall before something plowed into me.
“You shouldn’t be wandering around in your state. Let me help you back to your room.” A young nurse grabbed my arm. He was gentle, but I grew panicked. Was this it? Would I never escape here without being dragged away by what was coming here for me?
“Do you often run into people without saying sorry?” a man’s voice asked from behind me.
Looking up from staring at my feet. Crinkling my nose, running into him was inconvenient and finally I decided to respond to him, “If he had been paying attention to where he was going then I wouldn’t have run into him in the first place. But since I have; it was neither my fault nor his.”
I began to walk backward, still puzzled by him. Not because I ran into the nurse, and was caught by a doctor as well. But because he felt familiar, and the way the scar ran down his face through his eyebrow… I choked on my own breath. Those violet eyes. He was the guy from the park.