by J L Sapphire
“Why are you getting mad, Summer? You’ve always asked me to keep it 100 with you. Now, I’m sitting here being man enough to admit my feelings to you, and you’re giving me attitude?”
“My boyfriend- who was just about to have sex with me by the way- suddenly stops and tells me that he wants to break up. I think that’s grounds for having an attitude.”
“Well at least I stopped before we had sex. If I was a doggish type of guy, I would have got some first, then told you I wanted to break up. Come on, cut me some slack, here.”
“So what…you want a fucking medal for that?”
“You know what, I’m just gonna go,” Justin said, standing up to leave.
“Oh so, just like that…you’re gonna walk out? Why, Justin?” Summer was trying her best to keep her emotions in check because even though she was crushed, she wasn’t about to cry and let Justin see how much he’d hurt her.
“I just told you…we’re moving too fast. I really love you, Summer and I want this…us; but I need some time to make sure I’m not rushing into anything just because the sex is good. That’s how so many people end up getting divorced after not being married very long- they’re too focused on sex and not all the other aspects of the relationship.”
“Well, we don’t have to have sex then,” Summer told him. “That’s not why I was with you anyway. We have so many other things in common and we’ve always had a lot of fun together.”
“Trust me, I know and you’re right…we’ve had a lot of fun. But you’re ready for marriage…I can tell. The bridal magazines you have lying on the coffee table, you’re always dragging me off as your date to all these weddings…I know that’s what you want and you deserve to be married…to a man who wants to be married to you. And I’m not that man…not right now.”
Summer’s heart- which had cracked the moment Justin told her he wanted to break up with her- shattered and broke completely when he revealed that he didn’t want to marry her.
“I hope you won’t hate me and I’d still love for us to be friends,” Justin told her, attempting to soothe her pain as he made his way towards the door.
Summer- trying to hang on to her dignity- simply nodded her head, although she wasn’t agreeing to or declining his friendship offer. To be honest, she hated Justin and everything he stood for at the moment, but she was simply too shocked and stunned to formulate a response to his words.
“I’ll see you around,” were Justin’s last words to her before he walked out the door.
She remained in the same spot she’d been standing in for several minutes, even after she heard the door close. Blindsided was the only way to describe how she felt. She’d followed Steve Harvey’s dating rules to a T. She’d waited three months before she gave up the cookie to Jason or even let him spend the night; she’d asked him all those damn questions that Steve is always telling women they should ask men, to gauge whether or nor he’s boyfriend material or simply a good lay- ‘what were his long and short term goals, his views on relationships, and whether or not he saw her as marriage material.’ She hadn’t talked about marriage or having kids unless Justin brought up the subjects- because she didn’t want to scare him off…and Justin still dumped her.
Okay, so maybe she did have a couple of bridal magazines lying around the house- that wasn’t necessarily a hint to him that she wanted to get married, though. Actually, it kind of was . And she took him as her date to her friends and family member’s weddings because there was nothing more depressing than a single woman who desperately wants to get married attending a wedding solo. Especially when you are the single woman everybody always asks, “Are you ever going to find a man and get married?”
She’d remained patient- acting like the lady she’d been taught to be while thinking like a man. She’d waited patiently for Justin to pop the question, and all she got in return was egg on her face. Angrily, Summer walked over to her bookshelf, thumbed through the books until she found Steve Harvey’s book, Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man , then she walked into the kitchen and tossed it in the trash. That’s what she thought of Steve Harvey, his book, and his relationship advice- it was straight garbage.
***
The next afternoon, Summer and Dionne, sat at a table inside Haagen-Dazs, taking a break from shopping. Dionne’s mom and Summer’s mom were sisters and the first cousins felt more like sister’s themselves. Dionne had called Summer earlier that morning to see if she wanted to go to Lenox Square with her, to get in some last minute shopping before they left for Miami. Summer, still heartbroken, had declined, but Dionne refused to take no for an answer and just showed up at her door anyway and demanded that she get dressed and come with her.
“So, there were no signs that Justin wanted to break up?” Dionne asked Summer.
“None, whatsoever. It’s like, one day we were happy, all over each other and the next day, he was saying we were moving too fast and he wanted to break up with me. I just don’t get it. Did I do something wrong? Was it something I said?” she asked rhetorically. She knew Dionne didn’t have the answers to her questions, but she asked them anyway.
“Did you ask him why?”
“Yes, and all his punk ass had to say was how great he thinks I am, yet he still wanted to break up. Oh, and he also said he wanted to make sure were weren’t rushing into anything too soon, then he turned around and said he knows I want to get married but he doesn’t want to marry me.”
“Hmm, sounds a little suspect to me.”
“Me too, but I wasn’t about to break down in tears and beg him not to leave me. I have way too much pride and dignity for that. Even so, I’m hurt as hell. I thought he could be the one, ya know.”
“You think he’s gay?”
Summer slanted her eyes at her cousin. “Why you always think somebody gotta be gay, Dionne?”
“Hell, the whole world is gay these days, it seems. Every time I turn around, somebody else has stepped out of the closet and announced that they’ve become the newest member of Gaydom, a*k*a, the gay kingdom.”
“You say that like you have an issue with gay people.”
“I don’t have an issue with gay people, but I am tired of their lifestyle being shoved down our throats. Personally, I love me some gay men…they’re hilarious and will read you for filth. But I can do without seeing gay sex scenes on just about every single t.v. show that comes on these days…and that goes for men and women. As much as I love me some Orange Is the New Black , I’m so over the whole Piper/Alex lesbian love storyline. Like we get it, white girls like to stick their tongues down each others throats while fingering each other…can we move on. Then, a few days ago I even read that Disney is making an animated movie with two gay men who fall in love and get married. Like, why are they teaching babies and kids the gay life-style at five years old? That’s what I have a problem with…not gay people in general.”
“I can agree with you there. I’m getting tired of seeing it too. I love me some Shonda Rhimes, but just about every show of hers have gay and lesbian sex scenes.”
“Exactly. That’s why I said maybe Justin dumped you because he wants a man instead.”
“Nah, I don’t think that’s why he broke up with me. It’s gotta be something else.”
“Well, whatever it is, I’m not going to let you spend the whole Miami trip worrying about it. Hell, there will be so many fine ass men there, you won’t even think about Justin.”
“I’m not even sure I wanna go now.”
“The hell you ain’t. I know you’re not going to let some man have you sitting up in the house crying, binge-eating, and watching crappy romantic comedies while life passes you by. You know you weren’t raised like that.”
“I know, I know…I’m acting like some overly-dramatic teenage girl who thinks her life is over and she’s about to die because her boyfriend broke up with her. To be honest, I just hate having to break the news to mama. She’s always on me to ‘hurry up and find a man, get married, and have me some grandbabie
s,’” Summer said, imitating her mother. “I love mama to death, but she can be a little pushy sometimes when it comes to marriage and having kids. I am not looking forward to hearing her lecturing, demanding to know why we broke up. Hell, I don’t even really know why we broke up.”
“Just tell her y’all are taking a break…at least to buy you some time to come up with a better explanation.”
“That’ll only lead to more questions from mama and you know I never could lie straight…at least not to her. She’ll see right through that.”
“Yeah, you’re right. Aunt Coretta be knowing everything. She’s like God- she sees all and she knows all, which is why you have to come to Miami with me. She’s going to go feed those damn cats of yours while we’re gone, right? If you don’t go and choose to sit around the house, she’ll definitely want to know why, and she’s going to make herself comfortable on the couch beside you and won’t stop hounding you until you tell her.”
Summer sighed, glad that she hadn’t taken off her dark sunglasses. That way, Dionne couldn’t see the moisture that was forming in her eyes, which threatened to release streaks of tears mixed with black eyeliner sliding down her cheeks. She blinked her eyes several times in an attempt to keep the tears at bay. She missed Justin like crazy and wished she could hear his voice, but her pride wouldn’t let her break down and call him, even though he’d said he still wanted them to be friends.
“Wassup, Dionne,” a tall, good-looking man said, walking over to where they were sitting.
“Marcus, hey. I haven’t seen you in forever. How long you in town for this time?” Dionne asked, standing up to hug him.
Marcus had attended high school with Dionne and Summer and after they graduated he joined the Navy. His training was in Lake County, Illinois, which was where he chose to stay after he completed his military duties. He only visited Atlanta every now and then, and it had been a while since he’d last seen Summer and Dionne. They had always been two of the prettiest girls in school, but he’d always had eyes for Dionne. Fear of rejection always stopped him from stepping to her. However, being in the Navy had changed his attitude and gave him a confidence he’d never really had.
“I’m here for a few days. So, how have you been?” he asked, devouring Dionne with his eyes.
Dionne was a pecan-colored, petite, yet curvy woman. Many people often referred to her as Toni Braxton’s twin, both because they were the same size and Dionne often rocked the same signature short hair-cut Toni did when she wasn’t wearing wigs for performance purposes. Guys drooled all over her all the time, similar to the way Marcus was doing at that moment.
“You still married? Because the last I heard, you’d gone and jumped the broom,” Dionne said, batting her lashes at Marcus.
“We’re, uh…s-separated right now,” he stuttered, glad that he’d left his wedding band in the glove compartment of his car. Marcus was lying through his teeth. He was still very married; however, Dionne seemed interested in him and he wasn’t about to pass up an opportunity to spend time with her. Luckily, his wife hadn’t accompanied him on this trip and what she didn’t know wouldn’t hut her.
Marcus couldn’t seem to take his eyes off Dionne’s red lips or the spoon that kept sliding in and out of her mouth as she finished her salted caramel ice cream. He was the epitome of a fly caught up in a spiders web- outta there…and he didn’t even know it. Dionne had him right where she wanted him, and unlike Marcus, she knew it.
“Separated, huh? What happened, you cheated on her?”
“Why you say that? How you know she didn’t cheat on me?” he asked, discreetly adjusting the bulge in his crotch as Dionne turned the spoon upside down and licked the ice cream off the back of it.
“Because you’re a man…and all men cheat.”
Marcus offered a nervous chuckle, but Dionne noticed that he didn’t dispute her statement.
“So, since you’re separated, who you been spending all that Navy money on these days?” Dionne asked, licking the spoon again, knowing that Marcus was getting hot and bothered.
“I’ll spend some on you if you let me.”
That was all the invitation Dionne needed. “Well, since you offered, I did see a pair of shoes in the Louis Vuitton store a few minutes ago that have my name written all over them. If you buy them for me, I just might let you take me out and I’ll wear them for you,” she said.
“Lead the way,” Marcus told her.
Dionne stood up to head to the Louis Vuitton store with Marcus. “You coming, Summer?”
“Nah, y’all go ahead. I’m going to sit here and finish my ice cream. I’ll be here where you finish shopping.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.”
“Okay, then. We’ll be back. Come on, Marcus.”
Dionne, in her tight denim booty shorts, led the way out of the ice cream parlor, with Marcus in tow. He damn near walked into the glass door, he was staring at Dionne’s butt so hard.
Summer simply shook her head as she watched them. Dionne knew how to work a man when she wanted to. And like Marcus, most men were too simple-minded and predictable to resist her sexual charm. He’d be lucky if he had any money left by the time Dionne was done with him.
Summer sat and scrolled down her Facebook timeline while she finished her mango ice cream. Her heart dropped when she typed Justin’s name in the search bar and none of the profiles shown were his. He’d either deleted his page or blocked her from seeing it, which was probably just as well. Having to see what he was doing would have probably only made her feel worse about their break-up.
She glanced at her watch. Thirty minutes had already gone by since Dionne had left with Marcus, and she was tired of simply sitting in the ice cream shop, which was starting to fill up with moms and whiny kids. She sent Dionne a quick text saying she was going to Bath & Body Works, then she slid out of the booth and made her way down to her favorite store for a little retail therapy. Lucky for her, they were having a buy three, get two free body care sale.
Summer absentmindedly walked from table to table, perusing the different body wash, lotion, and body spray fragrances. She knew she should have declined the black, mesh shopping bag the sales associate had offered her when she came in, because now she felt inclined to drop more items into it than she’d intended to buy.
When she’d dropped a dozen or so items into her bag, she decided she’d better leave, before she spent all the money she’d planned to spend on vacation. She made her way towards the checkout line and waited behind a man and his girlfriend, who were ahead of her. The man had his arm wrapped around the woman’s waist and he leaned down and gave her a kiss on the lips as the rep rang their items up. A frown spread across her face when she heard the sales associate ask the man his email address, and she listened to him rattle it off to her.
“Justin?” Summer exclaimed, recognizing the email address.
Justin turned around and confirmed what she already knew.
“Summer…hey. H-how are you?” he stuttered, clearly embarrassed.
Summer opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. Instead, she could only stare at his blonde-haired, blue-eyed companion, who was giving her a serious stank-eye while holding onto Justin’s arm possessively. Summer wanted to cuss, she wanted to yell at him, ask him why. Instead, she turned as fast as she could in an attempt to exit the store and not embarrass herself. Her sudden movement caused her to walk right into a display shelf, which caused bottles to spill all over the floor. Because Summer’s eyes were still trained on Justin and his date, she didn’t notice that she’d stepped on one of the bottles that had fallen from the shelf, which sent her tumbling down to the floor, face first.
“Summer, are you okay?” Justin asked, offering her his hand to help her up.
“Get the hell away from me,” she yelled, tears falling down her face. Unfortunately, her sunglasses had fallen from her face, so the tears she’d been trying to hide all day were on full display. “How dare you offer
to help me after this trifling bullshit you pulled,” she yelled as she used the end of one of the tables to pull herself up. “We were moving too fast, huh? We just broke up yesterday and today you got your tongue down another chicks throat?!”
Her outburst caused all the customers and workers in the store to stop in their tracks and watch the scene unfolding in front of them. Summer was beyond embarrassed and couldn’t get out of there fast enough.
“Summer, wait,” she heard Justin yell as she ran towards the exit.
Not wanting to face Justin or hear anything he had to say, she ran as fast as her legs could carry her out the door and disappeared into the crowded mall. She ran to the nearest ladies room and hid out in a stall. She texted Dionne to see where she was. She had just finished shopping with Marcus, so Summer told her to meet her at her car in ten minutes because she was ready to leave.
Summer’s day couldn’t possible get any worse. Seeing her ex with another woman- a white woman at that- was so unexpected, but falling flat on her face in front of the both of them was something she didn’t think she’d ever be able to live down. At least now she knew why Justin had suddenly broken up with her.
“That’s just trifling as hell,” Dionne said as she listened to Summer recap what had happened as she drove them home. “You’re better than me, because they would have called the police on me up in there. The nerve of him.”
“I’m just so embarrassed.”
“You don’t have anything to be embarrassed about…he’s the one who should be embarrassed.”
“I’m talking about the falling on my face part.”
“Oh, yeah…now that is embarrassing. And in front of the new chick too…ouch. At least tell me that you kept it cute when you fell? Made it look like you meant to do that shit?”
“Girl, nah. That’s the worst part. I looked worse than a model tripping over her own feet and falling flat on her face on the runway when I stepped on that bottle. There was no way to try to make that shit look cute or staged.” Summer covered her face with her palms and shook her head in agony. “Ugh, I am so freaking humiliated,” Summer said in a mumbled voice.