Hearts Under Construction

by Hunt, Diann

“You are?” The surprise in his voice made her smile.

  “Yes, I am.”

  “Why?”

  “I want to apologize for my behavior. I can’t promise I won’t struggle with your authority from time to time, but I can promise that I’m working on it and, with the Lord’s help, I’ll do better in the future.”

  Silence.

  “Cole?”

  “Yeah.”

  She liked the sound of his voice, deep, masculine.

  “Are you okay?”

  He chuckled. “Yeah, I’m okay.”

  She heard him sigh.

  “Look, Ellie, I called to apologize to you. Seems we do this a lot.”

  “I know,” she whispered into the phone.

  “I wish we could just erase everything and start over. I have a feeling things could be very different between us.”

  She didn’t even want to think about what that meant, and she tried to ignore the way his words soothed her ruffled nerves.

  More silence.

  “Well, uh, I just wanted to set the record straight.”

  “Thanks, Cole.”

  “Um, I don’t suppose you—?”

  “Yes?”

  “Oh, never mind. See you tomorrow, Ellie.”

  “Okay.” Without thinking, she cradled the receiver in her hands for a full minute. She made an audible gulp. “What in the world has gotten into me,” she said to her living room. She got up from the recliner and walked to the kitchen for a drink of water. Only then did she see her hand trembling.

  Cole stared at the phone. A simple conversation, but somehow it left him shaken. The sound of her voice, sweet, vulnerable. Was that Ellie? Maybe he’d called the wrong number. She was clearly changing, despite her protests to the contrary.

  What about you? The thought came to him out of nowhere. He pondered it a moment. He supposed he could stand to change some. Okay, maybe a lot. But that’s not something a person can do by himself.

  He thought some more. Ellie had said, “With the Lord’s help.” Did she really believe God could change her like that? Isn’t God too busy running the world? He mulled the idea over in his mind. It just didn’t set well with him. His grandma had believed that—and she was a saint if there ever was one—but he couldn’t help but feel that a real man handled things himself. And that’s what he was, a real man.

  Just like his dad.

  He shook his head. He might as well face it. A real man would have left the bottle alone and helped his kids get through a tough world without a mom. It takes a real man to accept failure and grow from it. Everybody reaches for something to get them through the tough spots. His dad took to alcohol. Cole worked his frustrations out with new adventures like dirt bikes and parasailing, among other things. Ellie—he smiled—worked through her struggles with chocolate and/or diets. He shook his head. Seemed like an oxymoron to him, but then she could be that way sometimes.

  Not that adventures and chocolate were bad. What mattered were the motives behind them. His motive for keeping every minute occupied with some new thrill, new challenge. Ellie’s motive behind the chocolate binges. He looked at the ceiling. Are You trying to teach me something here?

  It took a moment to digest everything. Maybe he needed to talk to Jax. It didn’t hurt to find out more. He smiled at the thought. He’d better break it to Jax gently. Once Jax heard Cole was interested in knowing more about God, the man would probably keel over. Hadn’t Jax been trying for years to talk to him about such things, but Cole had always shrugged it off? Not this time, though. He wanted to know.

  The phone rang. Cole got up from his couch and walked over to answer it. “Hello?”

  “Hey, Cole.”

  “Yes? Do I know you?” Cole teased, knowing full well it was his brother.

  “Okay, so it’s been a while. I’ve been a little, well, busy.”

  “With the women, no doubt.” Cole had missed their banter.

  “Guilty as charged.”

  Cole laughed. “So, how’s it going?” Cole asked, walking back to the couch and settling in for a good talk.

  “Pretty good. I’ve been offered a job and I’ve accepted it. I’m going to finalize plans before moving.”

  “Really? Tell me about it.”

  “It’s a law firm in southern Indiana. Pretty reputable firm, looks like a good opportunity. I’ve quit my job here, and I’m taking a month off to relax.”

  Cole nodded. He knew his brother had been in a tough job, working as a lawyer and a public defender in Chicago. He’d suffered burnout and needed some time to heal his tired body and mind.

  “Sounds like a good plan, Caed.”

  “My appointment is the end of August. I thought if you didn’t mind, I’d come and stay with you for a couple of weeks before it.”

  “What? That would be great! Let’s plan on it.”

  “Really?”

  “Absolutely. I miss you, little brother.”

  Caedmon laughed. “You just can’t let go of the fact you’re a couple of minutes older than me, can you?”

  “Nope.”

  “Well, you’d better watch yourself. I’m as big as you, you know.”

  Cole groaned. “Yeah, I know.”

  “So, how do you like living in Farmsville?”

  “Oh, that’s cute. Real cute. Actually, it’s not half bad. I mean, the people are friendly, the job is fine, my coworkers are, um, interesting.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “Let’s just say life is a little slower-paced here than in Chicago.”

  “I’ll bet,” Caed said with a laugh. “I’m thinking that’s how it will be where I’m going. But to tell you the truth, I could stand a slower pace right now.”

  “Yeah, I know it’s been a tough couple of years for you,” Cole agreed.

  “I decided if I wanted to live to see my children grown, I’d better find another job.”

  “Whoa! Children? Did you say children? I didn’t think we’d been apart that long.”

  Caed laughed. “I mean future children. Nothing in the works.”

  Cole let out an audible sigh. “You had me worried there for a minute.”

  “How about you? Anyone special in your life right now?”

  Cole paused, though he wasn’t sure why. “No. No one special.”

  “Hmm, that didn’t sound very convincing. Are you sure?”

  “I’m sure,” Cole said quickly. The last thing he needed was for Caed to start in with his matchmaking schemes. Sometimes he wondered who parented whom between the two of them.

  The two brothers talked awhile longer, each sharing a little of what had been going on in their lives since Cole had left Chicago.

  “Well, I’ll plan on getting there next Thursday, if that works for you,” Caed said.

  “What time? I need to make sure I’m off work and not on an appointment.”

  “I’ll probably arrive around four or so. I know you’re not home by then, so I’ll just look around the area, maybe even stop in at your office.”

  “Sounds good. I’ll plan to be home by five if I don’t see you before then.”

  “Okay, big brother,” he said, emphasizing big.

  They both laughed. “Can’t wait to see you, Caed.”

  “You, too.”

  Cole hung up the phone. It would be great to get together with Caed. They hadn’t really had much of a chance to talk. It would be good to catch up on things.

  Cole held the phone a moment. Before he lost his nerve, he punched Jax’s number, then took a deep breath.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, Jax. Glad you’re home.”

  “I’m not getting rid of Ellie,” Jax said in a definite I-don’t-want-to-talk-about-it-anymore tone.

  Cole laughed. “Sorry, guess I made you a little edgy, huh? I’m not calling about that.”

  Jax hesitated. “You’re not?” His voice perked up considerably. “What’s up?”

  “Since you don’t have class tonight, I wondered if yo
u had time to go for coffee?”

  “Well, sure.” Jax sounded as though he could use a little company himself. “When and where?”

  “Tasty Grounds, in a half hour?”

  “Okay, I’ll see you there.”

  That’s what Cole liked about being a guy. When guys decided to get together, they could do it on a whim. It seemed women had to plan things weeks in advance or it threw their whole world into chaos. He’d just never understood that.

  Cole hung up the phone, his heart thumping. He wasn’t sure where this all would take him, but this time, he was willing to find out.

  Not wanting to appear too anxious, he turned on the news for a minute to kill some time. An advertisement flipped on about an antique car show. Maybe he’d take Caed over there. His brother had always had a taste for old cars. He might enjoy it. Besides that, what else was there to do in Walker, Indiana? It certainly didn’t offer what Chicago did, but he had said he wanted a change of pace, and Cole figured Walker would offer that very thing.

  Cole rubbed the back of his neck. He couldn’t imagine people actually settling in a town like this. He supposed it appeared desirable to Caed because of his burnout at work. Cole wasn’t sure he could settle anywhere, let alone a quiet little town far from the big-city lights to which he was accustomed.

  He stretched and yawned. Not that it mattered. He didn’t have a reason to settle down anywhere. Jax had known the risks when he took Cole on at the office. It was a trial thing. Cole would stick it out for a while, but, well, he just couldn’t see himself staying around. Life had too many things to offer. People to meet, places to go, adventures to experience. He’d just help out his college buddy for a while, then be on his way.

  With a glance at his watch, he decided it was time to go. He grabbed his keys and headed for the car.

  Jax and Cole sat at the table with their coffees in hand, the no-frills, thick black stuff. Cole figured real men drank espresso—or practically as strong—the kind of brew that grew hair on your chest and made you want to yodel and swing from a tree. Jax was a little more tame, using a swig of cream, but he argued he could beat his chest with the best of them.

  “So, you gonna tell me what this is all about?” Jax asked, taking a gulp of his drink.

  “Can’t a guy ask his bud to coffee for no reason?”

  Jax shook his head.

  Cole shrugged. “Okay, you found me out. I have some questions, and I thought you’d be the best one to answer them.”

  Jax raised his eyebrows. “Uh-oh, sounds serious. Work-related?”

  “Nope.”

  “Really?” With eyes narrowed, Jax stared at Cole. “Now I’m puzzled. I can’t imagine what I could give you advice on. You’re the expert.”

  “No. No, I’m the jack-of-all-trades, master-of-none, remember?”

  “Well, I’m not a master of anything, either.”

  “Ah, but you know the One who is.”

  Jax looked at him, hard, as if he hadn’t heard right. “What are you saying, Cole?”

  “I’m saying all these years you’ve been trying to talk to me about God, and I wasn’t interested. Well, now I’m interested.”

  Cole thought that if Jax’s eyes got any bigger, they’d pop right out of his head.

  “Well, for the first time in my life, I’m speechless.”

  Cole laughed. “We can wait a minute. If I know you, it won’t last long.”

  They spent the next couple of hours discussing God, His truths, His Word, the misunderstandings of man, the things yet to be revealed.

  “Wow, you’ve given me a lot to digest,” Cole finally said.

  “Listen, Cole. I have an extra Bible at home. How about I bring it to work tomorrow, and you can take it home. I’d like you to read the Gospel of John in the New Testament. Start tomorrow reading the first chapter. Call me with any questions.”

  Cole nodded. “I don’t know how I feel about it all just yet.”

  “I understand,” Jax said. “But God is working on your heart, Cole. Give Him your full attention before you make your decision, okay?”

  Cole nodded. “Thanks, Jax. You’re a good friend.”

  “I’m just glad you talked to me about this. I’m telling you, Cole, I’ve never regretted my decision to follow Him.”

  “I believe you. There’s a difference in your life. In Ellie’s, too. I mean, you’re both human, make mistakes, but there’s still that difference. And that’s what I can’t get away from.”

  “I’ll be praying for you, man,” Jax said, as they walked toward their cars.

  “See you tomorrow, buddy.”

  Jax waved.

  Cole climbed into his SUV and started the engine. “Thanks,” he whispered into the night air, feeling sure Someone had heard him.

  Chapter Ten

  At the Chinese restaurant, Cheryl and Ellie followed the waitress to their table.

  “So, Ellie, how was work today?” Cheryl asked, as the waitress seated them. The scents of Chinese cuisine hovered over the nearby buffet table. “Mmm, that smells good enough to eat.”

  “Call it a lucky guess, but I think they planned it that way,” Ellie said. She glanced at the table, squinting to see what was there.

  “You gonna get the buffet?” Cheryl asked.

  “It looks good, but I’d better not. I shouldn’t eat that much.”

  Cheryl smirked. She started to comment then seemed to think better of it. “So, you didn’t answer my question. How was work today?”

  “Oh, it was fine.” Ellie looked around at the oriental decor and noted the music playing softly overhead. She could kick herself for never learning to use chopsticks.

  “No problems with lover boy—I mean, Cole?”

  As if Cheryl had happened upon Ellie’s chocolate stash, Ellie pinned Cheryl midbreath with a don’t-even-think-about-it glare. Before Cheryl could comment further, the waitress walked up and took their drink orders.

  “Seriously, I’m going to work through this, Cheryl. I’ve been praying about the situation, and I think it will be okay.” In hopes of dismissing the matter, Ellie opened one of the menus the waitress had left. “I’m starved.”

  “Well, now, there’s a surprise.”

  Ellie made a face.

  “Which diet are you on today?” Cheryl asked, glancing through the list of entrées.

  Ellie winced.

  Cheryl put her menu on the edge of the table and leaned forward. “You know it’s a control issue, don’t you?”

  Oh, no, Dr. Phil came to dinner. Ellie knew she might as well not fight it. She put her menu down and looked at Cheryl. “Control?” She said the word with a definite, do-tell sound to it.

  Cheryl nodded. “It’s a food issue. You feel like your life is out of control and food is the one thing you can control, so you diet.” Cheryl leaned against the back of the booth looking rather intelligent.

  “You’re saying it’s bad to want to control my food intake?”

  “Dieting is not a bad thing, if you’re doing it for the right reasons. You know, health problems and all.”

  “So, are you going to have me on your TV show, Dr. Phil?”

  “Go ahead and make fun,” Cheryl said, sounding smug. “I’m just trying to help.”

  “I thought mother hens protected their chicks, not pecked them to death. Between you and Mom, I feel like hanging out with a fox would be safer.”

  “Any fox I know?” Cheryl raised her eyebrows.

  Ellie pulled her mouth into a thin line.

  “Okay, okay, I’ll behave.” The waitress placed their drinks in front of them, and Cheryl took a sip of her iced tea. “But I still think you should consider what I said about the diet thing. I mean, if you were truly serious about dieting, you wouldn’t hoard chocolate. We both know you don’t need to diet. And if it’s a control thing, well, we know Who is supposed to be in charge.”

  Ellie wasn’t in the mood for a sermon. She snapped open her menu once again. “Can we change the subj
ect?”

  “Sure,” Cheryl replied pleasantly. “Just remember, best friends say the hard things.”

  That’s why so few people have best friends, Ellie thought, though she kept the comment to herself. For the flit of a second, she wondered if what Cheryl had said was true. After all, chocoholics and dieters really didn’t mix. Why did she diet? She always blamed it on weight, but deep down, she knew her weight didn’t fluctuate all that much. She just needed a reason to diet. Oh, she hated it when Cheryl was right. Not that she was convinced that Cheryl was right on this matter. At least, not yet. Ellie decided maybe she’d think about it later. Maybe.

  In a weird sort of way the conversation actually lightened her mood. She could forget her liquid diet and eat whatever she wanted tonight. And right now, fried rice, egg rolls and assorted entrées, topped off with fortune cookies, sounded pretty good….

  The next morning, Ellie called a couple to set up an appointment to go over floor plans. After contacting a few subcontractors about a current job and then documenting tasks completed in her file, she took a breather. Making circular motions with her shoulders, she tried to work out the kinks. Her muscles could knot up faster than three chili dogs in an empty stomach. She rolled her head from side to side.

  “That bad already?”

  Cole stood beside her, grinning.

  “Hi,” she said with a smile. She told him what she had been working on.

  “Hey, listen, I’ve been thinking.”

  Uh-oh, never a good sign when Cole had time to think.

  “I thought it would be a good idea if on the day we are scheduled to visit job sites, we do it in the mornings from now on, rather than the afternoons.” Before she could respond, he continued, “That way, we could make the necessary phone calls for those particular homes in the afternoon when we returned to the office.”

  She swallowed hard. “That’s fine, Cole, if that’s what you want to do.” She smiled, though she mentally tried to work through her schedule to accommodate the new policy.

  His eyes narrowed. “Excuse me, but do I know you?”

  “Okay, so I’m not the most flexible person around.”

  Cole simply laughed and walked away.