by Cynthia Hart
“It’s okay. Forget about that for now, Liz.” Rachael did not want to get into a fight with Liz today, she was focused on keeping their friendship together. “Let’s turn on a movie, and I can give you the notes you missed in Biology, does that sound good?” Liz gave a small nod to Rachael’s question and got up to find the remote.
“I doubt your notes will do me any good, Rachael. I’ve seen your note taking skills first hand.” Liz joked, Rachael laughed with her. Rachael was extremely grateful to have Liz back talking to her and laughing with her. She hated to think how Liz was a senior and she was leaving in less than a few months.
After spending time with Liz, Rachael felt a new appreciation for life. It made her realize how short life was, she was even more determined to enjoy the time she had with Blake, and she was going to make a point of getting herself out of the dark in his life. Rachael wanted to know everything about him, even if he thought it was dangerous. Either one of them could die any minute, and if that were to happen, she would want to know they were fully involved in each others’ lives.
Rachael went to the bar to see if Blake was around, but to her surprise, he was nowhere to be seen. She asked around if anyone had seen him, but no one knew where he was, a waitress asked if she was looking for KT in a hushed tone. Rachael had no idea what the woman was talking about, so she politely told her she wasn’t.
It was times like this that Rachael wished Blake wasn’t so shady about his life. Blake had never given her a phone number or and address, the only way Rachael could get in contact with him would be by meeting him at the bar. Rachael waited around for almost an hour before giving up and going back to her dorm. Blake was a tough guy, he was probably just at home taking the day off from whatever his work was.
The weather had turned while Rachael was at the bar hoping that Blake would show up. She wasn’t dressed for walking in the snow, but she didn’t have much of a choice, there was a part of Rachael that was hoping that at any minute Blake would show up with a heavy jacket, knowing that she wouldn’t have thought ahead to check the weather and bring a jacket. Rachael laughed to herself as she climbed the stairs to her dorm room, she really was in love.
Chapter 8
Rachael didn’t even remember falling asleep when she woke up. God, she felt terrible, like every time she moved she would throw up. She dragged herself out of bed and located her thermometer, after reading that she had a high fever, Rachael texted Liz to let he know she wouldn’t be in class today and that she hoped Liz was doing better today. After that, Rachael took some cold and flu medicine and thankfully fell asleep again.
When Rachael woke up again she felt a wet washcloth on her forehead, she blinked and saw a glass of water on her nightstand. Slowly, Rachael sat up and looked around she didn’t see her roommate anywhere. She still felt sick but she did feel better, she looked on the floor and saw a bucket she didn’t recognize.
“Oh good, you’re up.” Blake’s voice made Rachael jump out of her skin. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” Rachael looked blearily at Blake, she felt like she was hallucinating.
“Blake?” Rachael narrowed her eyes to see better. “Are you actually here?”
“Yep, here I am. In the flesh.” Blake did a little twirl which made Rachael laugh.
“Why are you here?” Rachael asked. “Are you the one that put the glass of water by my bed and put a washcloth on my head?”
“Yes to both of those questions and I’m here because it’s Tuesday,” Blake said like it was an obvious answer.
“Oh, that’s right.” Rachael hit her hand against her forehead.
“You forgot that it was Tuesday, didn’t you?” Blake asked, walking to the side of Rachael’s bed to fluff her pillows.
“Yeah, I’m sorry.” Rachael leaned back on her pillows.
“It’s no big deal, you’re sick. Since you can’t come meet me in the bar like this, I decided to come to you.” Blake smiled and kissed her forehead. “I made soup for you if I remember correctly these dorms are not made for cooking but only for reheating,” Blake said over his shoulder as he walked away to find his bag. Rachael’s mind was still trying to catch up with everything that was going on, she couldn't tell if there was actually a strange thing to happen or if it was just the fever.
“Wait a minute, Blake,” Rachael said trying to get Blake to slow down so she could catch up. “How did you know I was sick?”
“When you weren’t there I asked Liz if she knew where you were. She told me.” Blake said casually. “How hungry do you feel? Do you want a big or a small bowl of soup?” Blake looked around his bag for a ladle.
“Whoa, back up. You had a conversation with Liz, and she gave you a straight answer? Did you have to pester her into telling you where I was?” The very idea that Blake and Liz could have a conversation without fighting with each other was unbelievable for Rachael.
“It was pretty straightforward.” Blake shrugged. “I asked her if she knew where you were and she told me, no snarky remarks or fighting.”
“I just can’t see that actually happening.” Rachael shook her head at the idea. “I guess anything is possible.” Blake hummed in agreement as he put a bowl of soup into Rachael’s microwave.
“Liz is a good friend, she probably didn’t want you to miss out on your one day a week with me.” Blake winked.
“I guess.” Rachael’s microwave beeped, and Blake went over to grab the bowl. He passed it to Rachael with a warning to be careful. “I’m sorry, I’m sick today.” Rachael apologized as she ate her soup.
“Don’t worry about it, it was nice to be able to take care of you.” Blake gave her a kiss on the forehead before sitting down at the foot of her bed. “You probably got sick from walking back to your dorm in the snow because you no doubt forgot to check the weather, like usual.” Blake teased.
“How did you know I had to walk in the snow yesterday?” Rachael asked with a small laugh.
“Some people at the bar mentioned you were there looking for me yesterday.” Blake picked a loose string on Rachael’s bedspread. “Why were you there looking for me?” Blake asked.
“I came by on my way back from Liz’s. I wanted to tell you everything went well with her. It was nothing important.” Rachael lied to Blake, it felt wrong, but she was working up the courage to ask, no demand, to know more about his business. “Where were you yesterday, by the way?” Rachael tried to keep her tone casual, but she was sure that she was failing.
“Oh, I just had to take a day to myself. I was feeling a little under the weather. You probably got this from me more than you got it from the snow.” Blake was lying too, there was something different in his voice. They both knew the other wasn’t being completely honest, but they didn’t know how to point it out to the other.
“Oh, I figured it was some work thing. Like maybe you had a business thing in another town.” Rachael figured this was a step in the right direction, at least she brought up the subject of his “business”.
“No, I would’ve told you if I was going out of town.” The tension between them was becoming tangible, Rachael couldn't take it anymore.
“Blake, I lied. I went to the bar yesterday because I wanted to demand to know more about your quote-unquote business. I don’t want there to be a part of your life where I’m kept in the dark.” Rachael kept her voice even and strong. She was determined to know more this time.
“What if my business was something you hated?” Blake asked, he could feel his own nerves starting to build.
“I wouldn’t care. I just want to know, Blake. Please tell me what is it that you do?” Rachael set you now empty bowl on the nightstand so she could lean a little closer to Blake.
“All right, okay then.” Blake sighed deeply. “You know how I was studying Chemistry before I dropped out, right?” Blake closed his eyes, it was now or never. “I’m a creator and supplier of packaged and controlled chemicals.”
“You’re a drug dealer?” Rachael’s voice shrieked sli
ghtly.
“No.” Blake was ready to protest, but he dropped his head. “Who am I kidding? Yes, Rachael, I am a drug dealer.” Blake told her with a sigh.
“How? Why? You realize that it’s illegal, right?” Rachael’s words fell out of her mouth faster than she had time to think about what was going through her head.
“Yes, I know what I do is illegal but look, the majority of these students are going to do drugs whether they are illegal or not. The stuff I make is pure, if they take what I suggest the mortality rates drop. There’s a less chance of them dying from drug use than other drugs on the market.” Blake was starting to sound slightly desperate. “I’m trying to keep them safe.”
“You’re just rationalizing it in your mind. You know what you’re doing is wrong but you don’t want to admit it.” Rachael couldn't believe that she was dating a drug dealer.
“No, what I am doing is illegal, but it’s not wrong.” Blake felt a rush of anger, but he pushed it aside. “Do you want to know the reason I dropped out of university?”
“Yes.” Rachael nodded.
“My friend died.” Blake started. “She was like a sister to me, she died of a drug overdose, and everyone blamed me for her death. I didn’t give her the drugs that night, I was with her, and I begged her not to get drugs from this guy who was known to deal synthetics. We got in a fight, and I left her, a couple hours later I went to the party she told she was going to. I was going to try and get her to stop again, I felt guilty because I was the one that got her to start going to parties.” Blake took a minute to take a few deep breaths. “Katie was already too far when I got there, I tried to pull her out of the party to take her to the hospital, but she refused. Things went from bad to worse too quickly for anything to have been done. The last thing she said was sorry. She was sorry that she fought with me.” Blake wiped a tear from his eye.
“Blake.” Rachael was about to say something, but Blake held up a hand, quieting her.
“Everyone that knew Katie loved her, I became public enemy number one around campus. They blamed me for her death, and I blamed myself too. I got to the point where I couldn’t get out of bed most days, and when I did get off my bed to go to class, people treated me terrible. So, I dropped out.” Blake reached over and grabbed Rachael’s hand. “I didn’t want anyone else to die how Katie did, so I created KT, the drug. I keep an eye on the people I deal to and get them help if I think they need it. I know you probably think I’m as bad as any other drug dealer out there, but I know I’m not.”
“Blake, can I say something?” Rachael asked, giving Blake’s hand a squeeze.
“Please.” Blake’s voice sounded strained.
“I still love you.” Blake’s head lifted at Rachael’s words. “I mean it, I love you, Blake. This doesn’t change that.”
“That’s the first time you’ve ever said that,” Blake told Rachael, a grin slowly appearing on his face. “I love you too, Rachael.” Blake crawled over to Rachael and gave her a kiss.
“I love you,” Rachael whispered to Blake before kissing him again. They fell into their familiar dance. Blake’s cold hands felt even colder on Rachael’s feverish skin, she moaned and arched closer to his touch. Blake moved his hands to the hem of her shirt and took it off, throwing it to the floor, he repeated the actions on his own shirt and kissed Rachael again. It was a firmer kiss than others that they had shared, this was the kind of kiss that was the foundation of love.
Rachael could feel everything with more intensity, she wasn’t sure if it was due to the cold, having Blake open up to her or if it was because they just exchanged I love yous. She didn’t care why everything felt better, she was just glad that it did. When Blake kissed a line down the column of her throat, Rachael threw her head back to give him better access. She moved her hands to Blake’s ass and pulled his hips hers, she was grinding against his jean-clad crotch and loving every second of it.
Blake’s hands traveled down Rachael’s body, settling on her hips, he kissed her hard and full of love before moving his hands to undo his jeans. Rachael slipped his jeans off of him while he took off her pajama bottoms. Everything was hot, their skin, their noises, and their breath. They ran their tongues over each others’ bodies to taste the sweat off their skin.
Rachael blinded opened her nightstand drawer as she started to kiss Blake again, she found what she was looking for a passed a condom into Blake’s hands. She broke away from the kiss and kissed down his neck, nipped at his collar bones. She had an unwavering need inside her to mark him with deep bruises.
“Now,” Rachael whispered, her voice rough with want. “Please, I need you inside of me.” Rachael arched her back as if to accentuate what she said. Blake didn’t waste any time.
When he sunk into her, there was no longer a need for words. They rocked against each other, bodies moving in tandem. Neither one of them could last very long, they muffled the sounds of their orgasms against each others’ skin. Moaning low and quiet so no one could hear them. They rocked against each other during their aftershocks, still not quite ready to separate from each other and end this part of their night.
They laid in each others’ arms for half an hour as they came down from their mind-melting orgasms. Rachael sneezed, breaking the comfortable silence between them and making Blake laugh as he handed her a tissue. Rachael blew her nose before settling back into Blake’s arms.
“I’m hoping you’re the reason I got sick that way we could split the blame equally.” Rachael joked.
“Rach, I need to tell you something.” Blake’s words caused panic to rise in Rachael. “I lied about being sick yesterday. Yesterday was the anniversary of Katie’s death, and I wanted to be alone. I’m sorry.” Blake wrapped his arms tighter around Rachael. Rachael’s mind was racing after what Blake had told her, she swallowed the lump in her throat before speaking.
“Was Katie a nickname?” Rachael chose her words carefully, not wanting to jump to conclusions.
“Yes, as a matter of fact, it was. Her real name Katherine.” The minute Blake spoke the words Rachael felt everything shift and click into place in her mind. In a flash, she was up and sorting through her closet for her clothes. “What are you doing?” Blake asked, his confusion was evident on his face.
“I have to talk to Liz,” Rachael told him as she tugged her pants on, she was fuming with anger.
“Okay, okay,” Blake said quickly trying to calm Rachael down. “I see that Liz told you about her sister.”
“You knew too? You knew that your dead best friend’s little sister’s friend was your new girlfriend.” Rachael accused Blake, he was still trying to follow her sentence.
“Yes. Yes, I knew that Liz was Katie’s sister.” Blake was getting dressed too now. “I don’t talk about Katie a lot, and Liz hates me for what happened to her. That’s why I never told you.” Blake was doing his best to get Rachael to stop being so angry.
“Is that why you like me? Did I remind you of someone you lost, and that’s why all of this started?” Rachael gestured between the two of them.
“No, no. I swear.” Blake closed the distance between them and framed Rachael’s face with his hands. “I started to like you because you were always yourself.”
“What do you mean?” Rachael’s anger was replaced with confusion.
“All the girls around here, all the ones that have ever flirted with me at least, they’re just doing it to get a better deal on what I sell them. None of them ever wanted to get to know me. You came along, and you never did any drugs, you never even drink alcohol. When you asked me questions, it was because you wanted to know the answers. That’s why I started to like you, that and you’re so cute.” Blake’s hands had dropped to Rachael’s shoulder’s as he spoke, she had her hands resting on top of his.
“I’m sorry for getting angry at you. I just got worried that you liked me for all the wrong reasons.” Rachael stood on her tiptoes to give Blake a kiss. “I’m still going to go talk to Liz.”
“I
f you still want to do that let me drive you.” Blake backed away from Rachael to put on his shoes.
“You have a car?” Rachael gasped. “How did I not know that?”
“There are so many things you don’t know about me, Rachael,” Blake said with a smile.
“Well, I want to know more about the man I love.” Rachael kissed Blake again before he moved to the window and opened it. “What are you doing?” Rachael laughed.
“I don’t want to get caught with having a guest you didn’t sign in,” Blake explained.
“Wait, is that how you got in here?” Rachael asked but got no answer in response. “How do you even know how to get in through a locked window?”
“Like I said, there are a lot of things you don’t know about me.” Blake winked. “Meet you outside in a minute.” Then Blake was gone, he did it so smoothly that Rachael was completely certain that it wasn’t his first time. Rachael finished getting ready, she sent a text to Liz saying that she needed to talk to her and then she was rushing to meet up with Blake in his car.
Chapter 9
Blake’s car was nice but not too showy which Rachael thought was probably smart considering that he was a drug dealer. She still couldn't get her mind around that, she was dating a criminal. A criminal with the biggest heart that she has ever known. Rachael slid into the car and gave Blake Liz’s address.
“Wait here,” Rachael told Blake when they got to Liz’s apartment complex.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to go with you?” Blake asked as he parked the car.
“You said it yourself, Liz hates you. I think it will be better if it’s just me.” Rachael unbuckled herself and got out of the car. “I’ll try not to be long.” She told Blake before walking up to Liz’s door and knocking. It feels like weeks ago since she was here even though it has only been a day and a half.