by Lila Felix
What I hadn’t told a living soul was that this wasn’t the first time my brother had expressed some interest in Colby. He had probably been in love with her as long as I had, or at least the closest thing to affection a bastard like him could feel.
I didn’t have any proof; it was just one of those things that I knew by instinct.
The only reason I knew nothing had happened when the two of them were together was because I trusted Colby with everything in me.
And she thought he was icky.
Ari was stewing, sitting cross-legged on the floor. “So, if this was their link or whatever, then if we break it, Colby should be good, right?”
We all looked to Malynn, but judging from her downward stare, it wasn’t anything we wanted to hear.
“Malynn?”
“Eidolon, I’m not sure how to say this. The hair was just his gateway? Door? I’m not sure how to explain it, but once he’s in, he is the only one who can remove himself from her. And even if he does, at this point, I’m not sure either one will recover.”
“What? Are you telling me that he’s in there permanently? Even if we destroy this weird voodoo thing he’s cooked up, Colby won’t be spared? Is that what you are telling me?” I slammed my fists down on the table in front of me, unwilling to accept her words at face value. It couldn’t be true. This wasn’t the way it was supposed to work. I was supposed to figure all of this shit out and fix it.
Because if I couldn’t fix what was happening to my own mate, then how in the hell was I fit to do anything the Almighty asked of me?
“I’m sorry, Eidolon. Yes, that’s what I’m telling you. He will have to be the one to end this.”
I stood and looked at everyone in the room. Though their efforts had been valiant, there was nothing else they could do for me—for us.
So, instead of guerilla tactics, I went for the throat. Taking out my phone, I dialed my brother.
He answered on the first ring of course. “Theodore. I assumed you would be calling.” His words said that, but his tone said something else altogether. He was scared and he should be.
“I have your mate—or your breeding buddy—whichever you prefer. We cut out the necklace you buried in her. By the way, that was weird. I didn’t know you were so kinky. Anyway, we have her and your spawn. I will give her back to you and you can have Rosemary’s baby back. All you have to do is get out of my mate’s head.”
He clicked his tongue over the phone. I’d never heard a nastier sound.
“You know what? I’m not sure that’s going to work for me.” I heard rustling and wondered where he was so I could tear him apart limb from limb. “How about I give you a little option since you are clearly the desperate one in this situation? How about you bring me to Paraiso, since apparently the Synod isn’t going to do their job—again—and then I can resume my prior plan? If not, I will kill Colby in the next—say—hour? How does that feel, Theo? To know that she will be ripped from you in sixty minutes? Hurts, doesn’t it? Especially since all this time, I’ve been feeding her lies about how you are no longer interested in her as your mate and how she should’ve never been your mate in the first place.”
“That’s not true,” I growled into the phone.
I heard the sound of fabric, and I knew my brother well enough to know he was shrugging. He didn’t give a damn. “You know, it doesn’t matter what is true and false at this point. Remember how the Synod took power over the Lucent? It’s the loudest voice that solidifies our beliefs. And right now, I’m the loudest damned thing in Colby’s world because I am the only thing in her world. You don’t matter anymore. I’ve all but convinced her that you’ve abandoned her for your precious duties.
“I’ll repeat myself if you missed some of that. I know you’re a little slow. Bring me to the army of the Almighty, and I will let her live. She won’t love you anymore and she won’t want to be your mate, but at least she will be alive. Isn’t that the sacrifice all you hero types want to make in the end?”
I stayed silent. He and I listened to the echo of each other’s breathing for a while, absorbing this long overdue conversation.
“There is another option, brother.” I spat the word, hating, again, that he was my family.
“No, that’s where you’re wrong.”
“It isn’t my option. It isn’t yours either. But yes, in the end, I think it will be the only way to solve all of this. In fact, I’d already made up my mind before calling you. I just wanted to give you one more chance to end all of this yourself.”
He cackled on the other line.
“Meet me in person. I’m sick to death of fighting a war with you from afar.”
“In Portugal—where it all started—at the house of Xoana. Give me three hours.”
His answer was swift. “Done.”
Many times, more than I could count, I’d been on a one-way street in terms of expressing my love to Colby.
This time, she really wouldn’t be able to say anything back to me.
And this time, I thought maybe I was okay with it.
“Colby, Querida, I think somewhere deep down you can hear me. You’re going to wake up soon—sooner than you think. Sanctum is going to be out of your head and out of our lives. I think you’re going to have to help take care of Pema. I know you hate her, but she will have no one else in the world and a tiny Torrent on her hands. I don’t know when the baby will be claimed for the other side, but it will be eventually, so don’t get attached.”
I didn’t know why I expected her to get up and make a smartass remark back to me, but I did.
“Ari and Malynn are going to be here when you wake up. They will explain some things, I hope. But there are some promises I’m not going to be able to keep. I will not be able to place my hand on the swell of your belly when you are having our child—because there will never be a child. I won’t get a peach cobbler belly like my dad and live to see how beautiful you will be with gray hair. But I can make some new promises. You will find a new mate and you will have children. Malynn has seen it.”
Malynn attempted to interrupt, but she quickly closed her mouth. We were surrounded by Ari, Collin, and all the others who had become more than friends, more like family.
“One day, I will see you again—I can promise that. You won’t be mine anymore, but you will be happy and living the life you were meant to live. When we were kids, there were no lengths I wouldn’t go to give you what you deserved. So many things have changed between us. We went from friends to lovers, back to friends, and then back to lovers. But one thing hasn’t changed. I will still give up everything for you. I always have, and I always will. I’ve given Ari a list of the things that you like and where she can get them. If you need a Slush Puppie, she knows the locations. I know you think I gave her that list for when I was in the Fray, but I had already thought way beyond that tiny time frame. There are some other things in place for you. I have a house purchased in Louisiana. My parents have the location. That’s for you and your—mate when you find him. Malynn will be by your side from now on. I don’t want anything to happen to you, and you will still be considered the mate of the Eidolon even though…”
I looked up at Malynn, who confirmed my promise with a nod.
“The best thing about all this is that I was made an offer by the Almighty. It happened the last time I was there. He has promised that if I give up everything, there are two things that will happen—one, Sanctum will be gone. Our creator is a creator of balance. And if there is no Eidolon, then there is no Sanctum. I have fulfilled my duty by the Almighty, and there will never be another Eidolon in the future. There won’t need to be. The Fray will disappear with me. I think it was made to test us somehow. I don’t really know. It’s one of many questions I have for the big guy when I get up there. Second, my precious mate, is that you will no longer remember any of this. You will remember me from our childhood, but nothing past the night that you ended it with me. You won’t remember all of these trials. You won’t r
emember the day we were sealed. It will all be gone. It will all be forgotten.”
Ari and Collin gasped. I thought they had an inkling about what would eventually have to happen, but they didn’t want to face it.
I had no choice now but to face it.
With one last kiss to her temple, I told Colby goodbye.
He was stalling. I didn’t fare well with stalling, especially when I felt like I was unprotected and unprepared for something. In my mind, I had the upper hand. Theo’s mate was clearly on the brink of death, and I was the cause of it.
There was nothing he could do. He had to submit to what I wanted or else she would die.
Pema would die.
And I knew that, unlike me, Theo wouldn’t be worth anything once Colby died.
I hadn’t even noticed that he flashed in until I heard his voice. “Torrent, you look surprised to see me. Isn’t this where we decided to meet?”
“It is. You have no wake. You simply surprised me.”
Theo took a seat on the couch like this was some informal meeting. “I have more surprises for you. Just you wait.”
I shot him my devious smile, but inside, I was shaking beyond control. I knew so much more than he did about our world and what our powers were used for, but somehow, his confidence and ease at the situation disturbed me.
“But first,” he went on, “I have some questions. I mean, this is all about to end, so I’d like to go on about my business with at least some answers.”
“Okay…” I shook my head. Everything was foggy and my head was cloudy.
“So, when did you decide to go all Hellboy on us?”
I looked outside at Xoana’s gardens. What once was beautiful was now withered. Trees were dried out and falling—hollowed out. Leaves were brown and crisp. Even the grass had decided to no longer grow.
“What happened out there?”
He looked outside, but again, was completely at ease, which drove me nuts.
“Out there? Oh, I think He told me something about that. You see, when Colby and I were sealed here, the land of Xoana recognized us as the Eidolon couple. But when Colby got sick—I mean, when you made her sick—the land of Xoana started to mourn. This is the result.”
“That doesn’t make sense,” I murmured.
“Let’s get back to the question, shall we?”
I heard a swish of air and turned to find Ari and Collin had joined us. “Do we need witnesses?” I smiled.
“I have bigger witnesses than these two. But no, they are here for my sake. To make sure everything goes as planned. It’s just for my peace of mind. So…” he pushed. “Hellboy?”
He acted like we were on some kind of timetable. To him, I guessed we were. He had a mate at home who was dying a slow and painful death.
“I think I’ve always known I was different. You were Mom and Dad’s golden child. There wasn’t really a place for someone who felt and acted differently. I was the outcast. And then there was Colby.”
He didn’t flinch like I hoped he might. But Ari and her new man did. Theo was such a good secret keeper. Even his keeping of that secret was a shock to me.
“Really? That’s it? Mom and Dad, in your perspective, didn’t love you as much as they did me, and you couldn’t have Colby, so you decided to devote your life to the devil and give up your soul? Damn, most kids get a tattoo or start wearing black. You may have wanted to try guyliner before going that far. I heard it helps.”
I squinted at him. His legs were crossed and he was laid back in the chair like a mafia boss. Today, more than any day I’d seen him of late, he looked like Theo. He was wearing one of those button-down shirts with gray pants, like he was dressed up.
Hopefully, this was his funeral attire as well.
“It doesn’t matter the reason, Theodore. And I’m tired of the questions. Are you ready to go or not? Your girl is on the edge, and I’m about to kick her right off.”
“What about Pema? What about your tiny little emo child waiting to be born?”
Tiny little emo kid—his sarcasm was getting better.
“It doesn’t matter anymore. It won’t save me. Nothing will save me, Theodore. It’s too late.”
He was wrong. My brother was wrong. I smiled to myself because I knew now, even more than I did before, that I was right. In one swoop, I could save us all. I could save myself from a lifetime of leaving Colby over and over by going to the Fray, knowing that she would spend her life half in pain and half in happiness.
I could save myself from the guilt all of that caused.
I would save Colby from living that life. She would have a mate she could count on all the time, not just when it was convenient for him. She would have children and not have to worry about the times when I would leave and make her, temporarily, a single mother.
She would have a stable, stress-free life.
And now, looking at my brother, and that twinge of regret I could see in his face, I knew that my choice would ultimately save him too. Because once he was left with no powers, he would be useless to the real enemy. He would be cast aside and forgotten.
“Do you love that female, brother?” I asked the question in earnest.
“I am incapable of love.” He looked away.
“I don’t think that’s true. It was only too easy to catch Pema on Easter Island, and such an obvious place. You were obsessed with that place when we were kids. And if I can move through things, so can you, so you already knew I could get to your little short-haired female. You know what I think? I think you wanted me to find her and save her. I think you were scared that she wouldn’t make it, and you knew we would take care of her.”
His eyebrow cocked but he said nothing. So telling.
“That’s okay, brother. There’s a painless way to end all of this. Come with me. It will soon be done.”
He followed me with a lot less fight than I thought he’d give. In fact, he gave no fight at all. We walked through the gardens, and as we did, they came back to life under my feet. The grass turned to green and stood at attention. The flowers perked up and went into full bloom. The bushes sprouted leaves and took their former shapes.
I walked all the way out to Rebekkah’s grave—the grave where I realized such a long time ago that in order for things to be okay, that a sacrifice must be made.
Rebekkah had made her sacrifice in order to put things in motion.
Collin had made his sacrifice of his position to help me.
Ari had sacrificed her life, along with my mate, in order to support me.
But now it was my turn.
“After I’m gone, please go to our parents. You’ll have to go old school, I’m afraid. Tell them everything so that when Colby wakes up, they will be in the know.”
He looked confused and sputtered something akin to ‘What the hell?’
“Ari, you know what to do. Flash to Colby as soon as I’m gone. I don’t want her to wake up alone. Also, watch those naked shower shenanigans, Collin will get jealous.”
Ari began to cry, so I pulled her in for the hug I’d intended to give her anyway. She’d never underestimated how much Colby needed her. Above all others, other than Colby, I was grateful to her.
“I cannot tell you how incredibly thankful I am that you were here with us through this all. I know you won’t leave her alone for too long. Make sure she finds that mate. Make sure he’s up to my standards, okay? Make sure he’s good enough for her.”
She nodded and then passed her tears onto Collin’s shirt.
“What the hell is happening, Theo?”
I had already spoken my peace to Collin in the middle of the night. He would need to be Ari’s strong pillar so that she could be Colby’s, so we got all the sappy stuff out of the way.
“I’m going to set you free, brother. You became who you are out of hatred, greed, and jealousy. And I’m going to give you your life back out of love. This will be the end of the Eidolon comings. The Lucents won’t need a leader after me. I believe we h
ave learned our lesson well.”
“Theo, there has to be another way,” Ari pleaded one last time.
“There isn’t, Ari. Don’t tell her that I love her. Don’t even mention my name—trust me—she won’t.”
And there, in the gardens of the female, Xoana, who started it all, who stood face to face with the Almighty and cursed the life she was doomed to live, I called on the Almighty, as he had told me to do when I was ready, and gave it all up for those I loved. I would come face to face with the Almighty Himself, not for my own blessing, but for my love and my friends.
Finally, finally, I had become the leader I was born to be.
I woke up in my bed. Ari was sleeping on the floor next to me. “Get up, you ass. Why are you on the floor?” I kicked at her.
She woke up, startled. “You’re awake?”
“Duh,” I said, staring back.
“Are you hungry?” she asked. She knew better. I didn’t really get hungry. I liked to stay thin so I could flash easily. The girl wasn’t really awake yet.
“Actually, I am a little. I feel like I’ve lost a ton of weight.”
“Colby, you were out for a long time. You’ve been—in—a—coma for a couple of months. We didn’t know if we’d get you back or not.”
I tried to get up to look in the mirror, but I found my legs didn’t want to cooperate. “No joke? What happened to me?”
She got up and picked up her blankets. “We don’t know. You flashed back after going to Rebekkah’s funeral. When you went to sleep, you never woke up again. We were supposed to go on vacation, but you punked out and slept for like two months.”
Tears welled in my eyes, remembering the funeral, but the memories were faded and fuzzy, like patches were missing. “I must’ve been sick or something even then. I can barely remember anyone who was there. Did Theo come to the funeral?”
Ari went to the door and opened it. “I’ve got to go pee. But don’t you remember? The jerk stopped emailing you. Said he had finally given up on you. He even had the nerve to have me give you the message. What an asshole.”
When her voice tripped over the last sentence, she said something about her throat being dry and rushed to the bathroom.