Mother’s shoulders slumped, and the golden cape she wore fluttered like a wave upon the polished black ivory of my floor. “You know I despise speaking of my marital problems with your father, but Ares, I often act out in this manner when I crave his attention. Though it shames me to admit it, I know”—she glanced away, staring at nothing in particular—“that your father steps out on me often, but he will always return to me.” She looked back at me, pleading silently with her cow-shaped eyes for me to believe her and not judge her for her choices. “Because he always has.”
Moments like this made it impossible for me to truly ever hate my mother. Much of her braggadocio and even her actions stemmed from the constant pain she felt in her relationship with my father.
I couldn’t honestly understand why these two didn’t just separate and be done with it. What they had was toxic, to all involved, and yet the heart wanted what it wanted, consequences be damned.
I knew only one thing with certainty—I might love Aphrodite still, but I had no wish to one day look back and realize I’d become my mother. I might love my mother, but her choices would never be mine. I could not stay with someone who did not wish to be with me. Period.
After reaching over, I gripped her hand lightly. She clenched up for half a moment before taking a deep breath and dropping to take a seat on the edge of my bed. “Oh, Ares, what fools love makes of us all,” she murmured tenderly.
I shook my head, feeling close to her as I so rarely did. “But Mother, you assume that this hurts me. And though my pride is pricked, I cannot say that it wounds me as deeply as you might imagine.” I did not lie. I would always love Aphrodite, but I’d been examining my heart for some weeks and had come to that astonishing conclusion. Though I wasn’t certain what my next move should be, I did at least understand myself well enough to know that I would not crumble without Dite by my side. “I always knew that Aphrodite and I might not last.”
Mother snatched her hand away, practically vibrating upon my bed like a snake gearing up to strike. “How dare you,” she said quietly, her voice seething with barely checked rage.
My brows rose, confused by how personally she seemed to be taking this. She’d never really liked Aphrodite all that much, and to be honest, I would have expected Mother to be happy to be rid of her in my life. “Excuse me?”
Her spine was stiff as a board as she imperially stared down her nose at me. “You and Aphrodite will give me grandchildren. She and Hephaestus will give me nothing but heartache and woe. I don’t care what you have to do, Ares. You will fix this, or so help me, I will make your life a living hell.”
Snorting, I shook my head. “Grandchildren. Come, now, that’s a bit premature don’t you thin—”
Her teeth showed as she snapped at me. “The oracle of Delphi herself told me so! It is prophesied.”
I blinked, realizing several things at once. As the goddess of mothers, Hera was desperate to enjoy the privileges of being a grandmother. Again. It wasn’t like she didn’t already have several, but she made no apologies to any of her children that I was her favored child. And as such, I knew that it was my children in particular that she keenly waited to dote on. And two, she didn’t give a damn about my personal happiness in how I should achieve those children for her. I chuckled, though I wasn’t particularly humored. “So this isn’t really about me at all. It’s about these mythical grandchildren you’ve pinned your hopes and dreams on. Well, Mother, as ever, it’s been enlightening to say the least. Now, I have to go and see about my day. Please leave.”
I pointed at the door, barely able to contain my growl of displeasure.
She didn’t look shamefaced or even embarrassed by what she’d just done. She wore a smirk that looked full of malice and made my blood run cold. It wasn’t that Mother was more powerful than I, simply that she was my mother. I would never raise a hand against her, and well she knew it.
“It is foretold, Ares. And no matter what you, she, or your damned imbecilic brother does, that will not and cannot change. Your destiny is inked in stone.”
“Get. Out.” I said it once more, this time allowing her to hear the tone of my displeasure.
Her thin brows rose, and with a careless shrug, she smoothly got to her feet. I stared straight ahead at my wall, hugging my arms to my bent knees, pointedly not looking at her.
With one last sniff, she turned on her heels and click-clacked her way out of my room. I didn’t move until I heard the low snick of the door sealing shut behind her.
Only once I knew she was well and truly gone did I move, and when I did, I let it all out. Shooting out of bed, I raged. The flames of war circled me, tightening like a fist and squeezing the air from my lungs. But I did not care.
I picked up the first thing I spied and slung it against the wall. Only once I heard the unmistakable snap of broken pottery did I realize that I’d thrown the last gift Aphrodite had ever given me.
It was an image of us, entwined upon a bed, “eternal lovers forever” she’d claimed. We’d been happy then. Contented. And I’d been thinking of things I’d never thought of before.
Dropping to my knees, fires all but spent, I set upon the shameful task of cleaning up the mess I’d made, sliver by sliver, bit by bit. Only once I’d gathered all the bits into a pile did I run my hand over the clay and release a stream of my war flame. The pottery instantly ignited then turned to dust.
Leaning my elbow upon my knee, I took several deep breaths. It was dangerous for me to ever give in to my temper, for all involved. It was why I kept such a close check on my emotions. And why I would extricate myself from any situation that would cause me to ever lose control.
I quivered with rage I’d not released. I was always angry, something my sister Athena often accused me of. Never smiling. Never able to find any contentment or joy with my lot in life. But no one understood why I had to be. They just thought me a stick in the mud. They didn’t know that what I did, I did to keep those I loved safe from my own fury and rage that always simmered just beneath the surface.
Swallowing forcefully, I slowly got to my feet and, with a sharp growl, called my war armor to my bed. I quickly dressed. I needed to get out of this godsdamned bedroom.
And I knew where I wanted to go. I also knew I could not. I’d promised myself that the last time was absolutely it for us. I would not bother her again. If she did have prophecy linked to me, as she seemed to think she might, I had to keep away from her. And yet when I was with her, the anger within me didn’t burn quite so hot. I could smile. I could laugh.
I blinked and shook my head. Clenching my jaw tight, I flicked open a travel tunnel with a negligent wave of my wrist. I would seek Athena’s counsel. My half sister and I weren’t very close, but she could often offer advice worth taking. It’d been weeks since I’d spoken with her last, but since she was the goddess of wisdom, there was likely none better to guide me through this emotional quandary.
Maybe Mother was right. Maybe all of this had less to do with the mortal bird girl and more to do with the betrayal of my lover and my brother.
After stepping through the tunnel, I traveled quickly toward Athena’s lands. Like me, she wasn’t one who enjoyed the company of many. She preferred, as I did, to be somewhat isolated from the rest of the pantheon. In fact, most days, Athena didn’t even live on Olympus. She mostly resided on her island, Nixas, just off the Mediterranean coastline, where she could oversee the training grounds for her all-female warriors. She stood upon an emerald-green hill, dressed in the snow-white tunic she often wore. A golden laurel crown rested upon her head. Her bearing was tall and erect, her face composed and often not prone to showing much emotion.
Athena wasn’t simply the goddess of wisdom, she was also a master tactician in battle. But where I tended to rush into the fray, my sister was cautious, employing more of a surprise approach than a direct one like I did.
Artemis wasn’t the only one of us who kept and trained an army. Her Amazonians were simply the most w
ell-known because of their vows of chastity and the idea of a community comprising nothing but females. Neither Athena nor I required our supplicants to swear such fealty to us, though if they should, their vow was binding and inviolable.
Beside her stood her eternal general, Asophinia. Where one went, the other usually wasn’t far behind. Asophinia had once been mortal, but my sister had long since bestowed immortality upon her. On the rare occasions Athena was unable to be on the island, Asophinia was more than capable of handling matters.
The shift in winds heralded my arrival, and my sister finally turned, a soft frown upon her usually stoic features. Once she spied me, she gave me a graceful nod, letting me know I was free to approach her.
I walked steadily, eyeing the training combatants, impressed all over again by the deadly skill and grace of the Athenian warriors.
“Brother,” Athena said in a husky drawl uniquely hers, quickly leaning in to kiss both my cheeks with warm affection. “What brings you to Isle Nixas?”
After removing my helmet, I propped it against my hip and wondered why I had come. Now that I was here, I wasn’t even sure what I meant to say to her. Shrugging, I glanced at Asophinia.
The general with the chiseled face seemed to understand the silent cue and gave a small grunt. “I shall see to the sparring ring. With your permission, my goddess.”
Athena flicked her fingers. “Of course.”
Only once Asophinia was well away did I clear my throat. “Your warriors look fit to fight. I wonder what are you training for, sister?”
She smirked. “Unlike you, I believe the key to any successful campaign is preparedness.”
I snorted. “Touché.” She loved giving me hell about my more forthright approach to war. It wasn’t as though my fighters were unprepared, but I didn’t believe in excessive training either.
“Though,” she said softly, “I do not think she came to me today to talk strategy, eh, brother? So why are you really here?”
Spreading my legs, I coughed into my fist. “You always cut straight to the chase, Athena. Very annoying.”
Her laughter was honest and open. Tucking an errant strand of dark hair behind her ear, she shrugged. “I am, as they say, fairly predictable, brother.”
Athena and I were related on Father’s side. No surprise there. But unlike Hera’s opinion on most of my half siblings, Mother didn’t despise Athena as she did so many others, likely because Athena was difficult to out-and-out despise.
It wasn’t that she didn’t have her flaws. We all did. She had a staunch core of beliefs that were absolutely unyielding. Even if a situation called for mercy, rules were rules to Athena. Either you followed or you didn’t, and should you choose not to obey, you would suffer the consequences. Again, I didn’t agree with her. I judged based on each person’s motivations and actions. Not everyone deserved the same degree of penalties. But steely morals aside, Athena was also a voice of clarity and calm in an otherwise volatile world.
“Does this possibly have anything to do with the rumors I’ve heard surrounding Aphrodite and Hephy?”
I lifted a brow. It was no secret that Athena had always yearned for Hephaestus, though I didn’t think my brother had ever noticed her. He was her half sibling, true enough, but for some damned reason, my very wise sister had become one of his greatest supporters. She had to be feeling the sting of this latest development as well, though she did not show it.
I wet my lips. “I suppose. In a way. Mother came to see me today. Told me I should fight for her.”
She pursed her lips. “And do you not agree?”
A gentle breeze stirred the ripened citrus fruit in the groves just over the hill, bringing their sharp yet sweet scent with it. I inhaled deeply, as Nixas was a very soothing place. The ringing of steel, the grunts of women practicing the deadly art of war, and the natural beauty of a land unspoiled were calming.
Dite had never taken to country life as I did. She much preferred the hustle and bustle of Olympus. The constant parties. The dances. Seeing and being seen. It was what she’d lived for.
I frowned, but how well had I known her, actually? Because there was no greater hermit amongst us than my brother. I thinned my lips.
Athena’s callused palm landed on my wrist, stealing me away from my thoughts. I glanced into her eyes as deeply blue as father’s own.
“You’ve come to me, so I assume you wish my counsel, yes?” she asked softly.
I shrugged. “I guess. I… The truth is, Athena, I’m feeling rather lost and out of sorts lately. And I’m not sure why.”
“Well, as to that”—she took her hand off me and pressed her lips tight—“I cannot help you. You’ll have to figure out what’s the actual thorn in your flesh before you can figure out how to fix it. But I can tell you that if you do not keenly feel the pang of this separation from Aphrodite, perhaps you did not love her as well as you thought you did.”
My brows dipped and my nostrils flared, and I was uneasy with her assessment. “I did love her.”
“In a way, I suppose,” she agreed with a gentle nod.
My lips curled. “How can you say that? Of course I loved her. I was with her some fifty years. We created memories together. Not to mention, Mother swears an oracle of Delphi promised her that Dite and I would one day bear her grandchildren.”
She laughed lightly. “I can definitely understand now why Hera would push you to stay with Lust. Hera wants nothing so much as your grandchildren crawling all over her lap.”
Snorting, I rolled my eyes. “Don’t remind me. She even threatened to make my life hell if I don’t at least try to get Aphrodite back. You know how much she despises brother.”
The smile slowly slipped off Athena’s face. “Yes. This I do know.” Then she sighed softly.
A corner of my mouth lifted up. “This must kill you too.”
Blue eyes as clear as glass cut to mine. And for just a moment, I saw beneath the stoicism my sister wore like a mask to the actual pain within. “You are the only one, perhaps, who would know.”
Because of how I looked at and studied others, I’d discovered Athena’s secret love for Hephaestus, probably long before she’d even been ready to acknowledge it herself.
She shrugged and gave me a cool grin, her mask now firmly back in place. “Anyway,” she said with a dismissive flick of her wrist, “that is neither here nor there. You’ve come to me seeking counsel. And here it is. You might one day regret not trying, at least making an attempt at reconciliation to say you’ve done it.”
“I do love her, Athena. She was the first woman I’d ever loved. Aphrodite taught me much about myself, my wants, and my needs.”
A gentle flicker touched her lips but quickly faded. “First woman. So there is another?”
My pulse lurched within me, and the war flame heated up the tips of my fingers. Swallowing hard, I realized my error too late. Athena was as perceptive as I was. Of course she’d have caught my blunder.
I shook my head, clearing my throat twice. “I…” It crossed my mind to lie, not that she would really care. But my own sense of self would not allow it. “I do not know,” I admitted softly. “I have recently begun to feel… things.”
Rubbing a hand over the back of my neck, I thought of the bird girl with her gorgeous feathers and her ability to make me laugh and genuinely smile despite myself. But I tamped down the thoughts quickly. I could not think of Medusa in that way. I had to stop this strange infatuation with her. “Not that it matters. She has sworn an oath of fealty to her goddess.”
My sister frowned. “She has?”
“Mm.” I mumbled, refusing to tell her that it was to her, in fact, that Medusa had sworn such an oath. Of chastity, no less. I knew Athena’s ways and what she would do to the poor girl even should I, her own brother, cause Medusa to break said oath.
I would never do that to either of them—force Athena’s hand or cause Medusa to suffer for my selfishness.
“What kind of oath was sworn?�
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“Chastity, I believe,” I said quickly, knowing damned well that it’d been just such an oath.
“Then for her sake, do not ever cause her to betray such an oath, Ares. The consequences could be dire.”
I snorted, even as my gut slithered with unease. “Obviously, though, she could have sworn said oath to Aphrodite.”
Athena snorted. “Yes, well, I’ve no doubt she’d let her off with but a wrist slap if she had. Still, an oath is a powerful thing. You do well to keep away from her.”
I blinked as a fierce and terrible ache spread through my body. Everything Athena said was true. I was being the better man by leaving Medusa alone.
And yet, the selfish side of me didn’t feel so. Every morning, I wondered how the little bird fared. Wondered if she’d already found another male’s eyes, wondered if someday she might be freed of this oath her mother forced upon her so that she could settle down and bear her male children.
My nostrils flared, and I ground my back teeth together so hard that they began to ache.
Athena’s shrewd gaze was assessing. “If this female is mortal and sworn to another, you must, you absolutely must leave her alone.”
I heard the thread of warning in her tone. Athena hadn’t out-and-out said that she knew the female belonged to her, but I knew that she knew it. Somehow, my brilliant sister had already deduced the fact.
Licking my front teeth, I gave her a careless shrug. “Of course, sister. I am a man of honor, after all. I will not cause her to break her vows. You have my word.”
Each word spoken was like a driving dagger to my soul. I barely knew this female, yet I’d forged an instant bond with her, just as I was certain she had with me.
“Fix your home, Ares. That is your first order of business. Speak with Aphrodite. For your own peace of mind.”
She was right, damn her to the blazes. But she was, and I knew it. A man of honor would never run off after someone else so soon after a breakup, especially one that was still very curiously up in the air. I had to find out what was happening to Aphrodite. And where I still fit, or didn’t, in her life. That was my number one priority.
The Greek Gods of Romance Collection Page 69