by Jeff Inlo
"You are now defending me? You used to argue with me about my choices. You were right. I was wrong. Why are you looking at it differently now?"
Ryson looked back over his shoulder toward the badlands. Hashing out old memories wasn't getting him anywhere. He didn't want to waste time with this debate. He knew Linda was trapped somewhere out there. He wanted to get there, badly, but he needed to save her as well. Unfortunately, he was dealing with something beyond his understanding-consciousness separated from the body. All of his skills as a delver wouldn't help him resolve that struggle. He hung on to one hope… that Lief could guide him to the answer he needed, and so he answered the elf's question.
"Because I'm tired of arguing. I'm tired of struggling with everything. You were right to be angry. People let you down. Your own camp let you down. You looked at the land and saw what was happening. I'm seeing it now. The magic didn't make things easier, it made things worse."
"That is in perspective."
Ryson couldn't accept that, not at that point. Everything had fallen apart and there was no other way to look at it.
"You want perspective? Baannat has taken control of just about every dark creature. Linda is trapped somewhere with him. So is Enin. You want to tell me what good has come from any of this?"
"Individuals made choices. Some made very unselfish choices. You risked your life to help the algors. Cliff behemoths risked their lives to protect Linda."
"And they failed!"
"Did they? How so? They sacrificed much to fight off the caelifera. Linda might have been taken, but are you so willing to dismiss the cliff behemoth's intentions?"
"What are good intentions worth?"
"Everything. Far more than you could know."
"And that's what you want me to believe?"
"That's part of it, but let us to return to your anger. I've tried to explain that I was wrong. Do you understand that?"
"I don't understand anything. Right now, I think you had every right to be upset. Maybe if I listened to you, helped you kill some of these dark creatures, then none of this would have ever happened."
"No! As I said, I was wrong, and now you are in danger of going down the same path as I did. You tried to stop me, now I want to stop you."
"You want to stop me? I'm not the problem. You're a spirit. You're dead. Go talk to whoever's in charge on that side. Tell them enough is enough already. What do they want from me? Every time I turn around there's another problem, another catastrophe. Why?"
"Why not?"
"Because it's not right."
"Would you like to become the judge with final say on what is right and wrong?"
"That's not what I mean. Come on, Lief, don't you think I've been through enough?"
"And who decides what is enough? You?"
Ryson fumed. They were getting nowhere. He almost turned his back on the elf and ran off toward the badlands. That, however, meant giving up, and for Linda, he held himself for one last question.
"Why are you really here?"
Lief answered without hesitation.
"Redemption. Not to earn it, but to understand it. There is a difference, I'm beginning to see that now. You can not find redemption by fighting new battles, Enin tried to retrieve it for all the spell casters, the dwarves for themselves. They wanted to fight a dark foe to make up for past mistakes, past sins. But that's more like revenge than redemption. It doesn't work that way. You have to accept the blame and hope to be forgiven. You can't just wipe away a sin at your own will. There's no scale that will allow you to ignore the mistakes by piling acts of perceived benevolence against them."
"And that's why you're here? To find redemption?"
"I hope to, but as I have said, redemption isn't simply earned by our actions and our deeds. We reach it through our beliefs as well, through what is truly in our hearts. I now believe I returned here to learn that lesson. I have seen it as I watched the entirety of this conflict, this struggle."
Lief appeared to grow brighter. His form took on greater definition. He remained an ethereal spirit, but he almost appeared as full flesh and blood.
"You believed in me and now I wish to believe in even more," the elf spirit acknowledged. "I also wish to help you, but I realize that in itself won't bring me what I seek. I believe I have already discovered that. Now, I only have to close the book."
That sounded like an ending, and Ryson was not ready for that.
"Before you close anything, help me reach Linda."
"I will, but you must do your part. Look beyond the struggle. Look inside. There is meaning to almost everything that happens, but you have to believe. That's what I meant when I said you had to believe. Can you accept that?"
"I'll accept anything if it can save her."
"I suppose that will have to do. Let me first tell you about where Baannat is and where he is keeping Linda and Enin. Baannat found a way to cheat death… and life. He's not in the veil between life and death. He has bypassed both completely. In doing so, he's created a completely new existence.
"The followers of Godson believe in the immortality of the soul, but that exists in the spirit world. Life has always been fleeting. It ends for us all. Life, death, and a transition from one to the other leading to immortality; that is the way. Baannat, however, has used the magic and the bizarre circumstances of his death to create immortality while still clinging to life. That has led to consequences in both the spirit world and the physical plane of existence. Life, death, and the veil between remain intact, but an entirely new form of existence-or perhaps non-existence-has emerged. That is where he has trapped Linda and Enin's consciousness."
Ryson accepted the explanation. He had no way, and no desire, to question it. He only cared about one thing.
"You said I can get there. How?"
"Enin created a shadow portal that is still in existence. It is in the dark realm near the cave where you encountered Baannat when he disguised himself to appear as me. You can go through that portal and you will join Enin and Linda."
So, he could get in. That was half the battle, but he wanted more.
"How do I get out? How do I get Linda and Enin out and back in their bodies?"
Lief did not answer, and this shook the delver's confidence. He spoke a chilling truth.
"That's the problem, isn't it?" Ryson asked.
"If you make it one."
"I'm not trying to make it anything, but if Enin can't get out, how can I? How can I get all of us out?"
"By believing."
"Believing in what?"
"That the answer will come to you when you need it most."
"I need it now."
"You will need it when you step through the portal."
"That's all you can tell me?"
"That's all I know. I'm not trying to confuse you or limit what I tell you. I have given you all the information I can. I have no secrets, but I can tell you this; their souls do not deserve that fate, and so, if you believe that there are other forces at work that understand that, then you can save them. You can be the tool to bring them to freedom, but you must let it occur as it is meant to be, not as you want it to be."
"Is there anything else you can tell me?"
"Just goodbye and good luck."
Ryson did not dwell on the true meaning of those words. He knew there was nothing else to be gained from the elf apparition. He had to save Linda. That was all that drove him.
"Thank you," the delver acknowledged and then sped off to the portal in the badlands.
Lief watched the trail of Ryson Acumen, his friend, fade off into the distance as the delver ran toward the end of his struggle at all possible speed. It was now time for Lief to face his own fate.
The elf ghost looked to the sky and reflected not on what he did to help the delver, and in turn to help Linda and Enin, but instead on the message he tried to deliver-the lesson he learned himself.
"Did I get it right?" he asked the skies.
As if in repl
y, Lief Woodson's soul streaked up to the heavens.
Chapter 33
"He's almost here!" Baannat giggled. "Isn't that wonderful? He's coming to save you, woman. Does that make you happy? Should I be scared? Maybe I should strike out at you while I still have the chance."
Baannat slashed at Linda's consciousness over and over again. He danced with glee with each slice.
The pain flashed in Linda's being as if the ghoul's claws were actually shredding her skin. There was, however, no flesh to injure, but her spirit erupted with similar agony. She wanted to scream, might have even begged for mercy, but she couldn't. There was no outlet for her, no release for the torment.
Confusion also began to overwhelm her. She wanted the pain to stop, but there was little else for her to seize. She had no other physical sensation. Her mind swelled with memories, emotions, and fears, but they lacked any tangible impression. The pain served as her connection to existence, even as it served to remind her that she had been swallowed by a state of nonexistence.
The uncertainty did not end there. She wanted to see Ryson, but then again, she didn't. Her emotions centered on the delver, that was a simple fact she could not deny, but they served as both hope and dismay. Being with him again would bring comfort to her soul, but watching him suffer at the hands of the ghoul would tear at her far worse than the ghoul's claws.
As if Baannat could sense her torment, he continued his assault by adding to her emotional chaos.
"You want him here, but you don't want him here? Is that what you're thinking? My, you are a mess. Well, let me tell you, it won't get any better for you when he does get here. He'll be as helpless as you are. And he'll feel the same pain. How much will it hurt him to see you suffer? How much will it hurt you to see him suffer? You will find out soon, very soon indeed."
"And if he does come, what then?" Enin shouted, hoping to intervene and distract the slink ghoul.
"Whatever do you mean?" Baannat asked almost innocently, but his words could not hide the snickers under his breath.
"I mean, where does it all lead? You take us prisoner, but then what?"
"I amuse myself."
"By torturing the three of us?"
"Yes!"
"That's it? You truly are just a shell of what you used to be-an empty shell at that. You must have lost a great deal of yourself if that's all that's needed to keep your mind occupied. Your power once exceeded my own. You used magic in ways others can't even imagine. You manipulated life to avoid death. And now you're just going to spend all of eternity torturing three helpless victims?"
"I certainly don't want to spend eternity listening to your pathetic attempts of diversion," the ghoul replied.
"I admit it! I'm trying to distract you, but there's truth to my point and you know it. Let's say that Ryson joins us. Now you have three of us. You've accomplished your goal. You torture us, but so what? You can't kill us."
"I don't want to kill you. I want you here with me."
"And that will be enough to keep you from drifting off into nothingness yourself? This is no trick of mine, ghoul. If you have any true recollection of what it's like to wield the magical power you once held, then you must realize I speak the truth. Your mind will go numb. It may take eons, but that's what we all face. It might come to pass that the three of us will accept the pain and torment you cause as a part of our existence. It will no longer be painful. It's you who will face oblivion first, for you will have nothing else to occupy your mind. No purpose."
"Your logic is faulty. I have other distractions to keep me occupied."
"Such as?"
"Why should I tell you, brother?"
"To prove me wrong," Enin challenged. "Don't you think Linda has already heard what I've said. I've given her hope. Dash it, if you can."
"Such an empty ploy, but I will humor you just to show you there is no hope. The very space we occupy defies both life and death. You know that now. It's too late for you to do anything about it, but you can't dispute it. It exists solely for my benefit and I will expand this new realm of mine."
"To what end? There's only the three of us? Do we need more room?"
"It's not about space. It's about control. Speaking of which, I will also conquer your precious land of Uton."
"And how do you hope to accomplish that? Your reach from this place is limited. Your power is nothing compared to what it used to be. You absorbed a great deal of magic, but you lack the depth of power and control you once had. Even I can see that. You spoke of Jure before, how he surprised you in defeating your thrastil and your dark sorcerer. Don't you think he's prepared to eliminate you if you ever ventured completely out of this new realm?"
"I don't have to leave here. I control the dark creatures. Even this Jure cannot hope to withstand a continuous onslaught."
"Continuous? How long will it truly last?"
"As long as I want."
"That's not possible and you know it. There are so many factors you're ignoring it's almost funny."
Baannat's tone changed with his demeanor. His laughs faded as he sneered toward the light that was the wizard's consciousness.
"Enlighten me."
"You admitted yourself the dark creatures are not completely under your control. They only do your bidding because you promise them something you can't possibly deliver. They wish to escape the dark realm and flee into your world. But why? They are looking for a reprieve from pain and suffering, but wish to avoid judgment. They want sanctuary without sacrifice. Do you think they can find that here?"
"What do I care what they find?"
"You should care. Once they realize your offer is an empty promise, you will lose your control over them. Your power outside of this place will diminish even further. Aside from that, there are other forces beyond us that will find this place, and you, and view both as an abomination. Do you think that you can avoid the consequences of life and death forever?"
"I already have!"
"I don't believe that. You're nothing more than a gnat right now, an insignificant bug buzzing around powers that neither you nor I can possibly comprehend. Eventually, the gnat gets noticed and when it does, it does not end well for the insect."
#
Reaching the first portal was the easy part, but Ryson did not know what to expect when he entered the dark realm. Before he stepped through the now gigantic gateway, he peered into the rift. The portal allowed a wide perspective of the hostile world, but beyond broken rocks, smoldering pits of fire, and dying trees, there was little else to see. Not even one monster guarded the other side. As Lief warned, the path was clear. It was an open invitation to the delver, and Ryson knew it.
Leaping into the portal, Ryson landed on the hard and unforgiving ground of the dark realm ready for anything. Despite the lack of guards, he remained cautious as the unkind world sparked every defensive instinct within him. He scanned the horizon, but still found no threats. He raised an ear to the oppressive hot winds. Unlike his first trip, a chilling silence greeted him from every direction. He could hear no screams in the distance, no moans of agony or vicious growls of fury. He sniffed the heavy air, but even the gut-wrenching stench of the place seemed diminished.
Ryson ignored the quiet as well as the underlying meaning of the clear path before him. If Baannat didn't want him there, the ghoul would have sent a swarm of caelifera at him. The way was open because that's exactly what Baannat wanted.
It went well beyond a clear path. Baannat was challenging him… mocking him. It wreaked of confidence and disdain. The slink ghoul knew the delver was coming and ordered the dark creatures away from the area. It was obvious… and frightening.
Thinking of Linda, Ryson ignored any consideration of turning back. He did not yet know how he was going to deal with Baannat, but he was determined to face him. The delver would not disappoint the ghoul.
Racing forward, Ryson found the ravine on memory. He did not have to rely on any trail. With the cave opening in sight, he saw two bod
ies on the ground below a round, gray break hovering in midair. He ignored the eerie hole that appeared nothing more than a suspended shadow, and instead, he ran to his wife.
He called to her, but she did not answer. He dropped to his knees by her side and carefully checked her condition. To his great relief, he found her alive.
To his dismay, however, she still would not respond to him. Her heart beat, she breathed, her eyes blinked, but she looked through him as if he was not there. She made no acknowledgement to his touch and no resistance to any force against her. She remained crumpled upon the ground, making no attempt to stand or even sit up.
The truth was plain. Lief warned him of what he would find. Only her body was in the dark realm. Linda's true being existed in some other place, some other dimension. Only the mechanics of her body functioned before him. Beyond that, there was no true consciousness within-no soul.
Ryson gently leaned Linda against the wall of the ravine and then tended to Enin. He checked the wizard's condition which matched Linda's. He was alive, but not aware. His body was empty.
He placed Enin's body next to Linda's and then stepped away from them. He gave them one last look, and finally peered into the shadow portal-the doorway he knew he had to enter.
He saw nothing on the other side. It was not like the rift between the dark realm and Uton. In that gateway, no matter which side he was on, he could see where it led. The strange shadow before him, however, had no clear destination. It was a simple hole in existence.
Ryson knew Linda and Enin waited beyond that rift, were held hostage by Baannat in the emptiness in front of him. He almost charged through, but he made one last consideration of his conversation with Lief.
He had asked the elf apparition if there was a way for him to defeat Baannat and to save his wife. Lief implied that an answer existed, but the elf had no more to offer than vague advice. Ryson had to believe, but believe in what?
The delver stood before the rift restraining the desire to jump in after Linda. Holding firm, he waited for some great awareness to strike him, some sort of inspiration that would guide him. The answer was supposed to come to him when he needed it most. He needed it at that very instant, needed it more than anything. If Lief was right, he would get his answer.