by Jess Ballard
I noticed as we approached that they, being the two leading us and the two others loading feeding the flames, were all wearing a band round their left arm, just above the elbow. It was a deep shade of burgundy, the colour of dried blood. From afar, it almost looked as if each of them had a deep cut that was seeping through their shirts.
As we approached, the two tending to the fire stopped what they were doing and walked to meet us. It was so synchronised the way they walked round either side of the fire and met in the middle it reminded me of a military formation.
“Who are these?” The person who spoke was, I assumed from her general manner, the “Captain” the others had spoken about. She had a striking, commanding face, her high cheekbones highlighted by her shaved head. She can’t have been much older than me, but her manner of speaking gave her an air of maturity.
“Not really sure. They say they want to fight, though,” one of the women answered. We had reached them and the four had gravitated towards each other so we were facing them, two lines sizing each other up.
“Who are you, then?” the one who had not spoken yet said.
“Jenna,” I blurted out, a bit louder than I meant.
“I’m Peter.” He raised his hand in a half wave and quickly lowered it as our hosts’ expressions did not soften.
“Are they clean?” The Captain turned to the two who had found us.
“Yes,” they said in unison.
She turned her attention back to us. “What makes you think you can join us? Do you even know what hunting down and killing As takes?” The Captain looked cynical. I stole a glance at Peter, whose eyes had hardened. I let him speak.
“Actually, we do know a thing or two about killing As. We probably haven’t seen as many as you, but still, we have fought them.” Peter’s voice did not allow for any argument. The Captain looked at her three companions, who communicated with her through slight gestures. When she turned back, she seemed less suspicious of us.
“We’ll give you a chance, but I’m not saying yes. Help us mop up here, and then show us what you can do if we meet a stray.”
“Okay. Thank you.”
“Please,” she held up hand as if to deflect my thanks, “we haven’t done anything yet. I’m Maddie, but everyone calls me Captain. That’s Jeremy, and the two who found you are Sasha and Jade.” They nodded at us, reluctantly accepting the will of their leader.
“We’re sort of part of the army,” Sasha explained.
“Not the government part, though,” Jeremy muttered.
“Yeah, we broke away from that, we’re more of an independent company...” Sasha trailed off when she saw the Captain giving her a ‘shut up’ look.
“All you need to know is this: we are going from town to town, killing any infected we find.”
“And all you need to know is that that is what we want to do.” Peter was still looking uneasy. I thought that it was a good opportunity to ask a question.
“Why do you wear armbands?” As soon as I said it I realised that the answer probably didn’t come under ‘all you need to know’.
“Our friend was killed. This is our symbol for her spilled blood,” Jeremy replied, looking me right in the eye.
“I’m sorry. We had a friend who died, too.” He nodded. Then, apparently deciding that the pleasantries were over, the Captain turned round and walked back to the fire and began working once more. Almost as if it were choreographed, the other three turned and followed her. Peter and I hurried after them, eager to offer our help and gain their trust.
As we finished off the burning, the unusual army of four chatted amiably, even cracked jokes. Peter and I remained silent, though I felt at ease with them. Peter’s face still bore some trace of paleness and agitation.
The friendly atmosphere was a little juxtaposed by our task. The pile of limbs, torsos, heads and assorted entrails and tissues was perhaps the foulest thing I had ever encountered. Quite aside from the macabre nature of handling severed body parts, the actual flesh was unlike normal human flesh; that is, unlike what I expected it to be, which was something similar to steak and other animal meat products.
You could immediately tell it was infected. The smell, of course, was the rancid smell of death, perfectly coupled with the smell of same flesh burning. It was black and grey and brown. It was dirt and darkness, the worst parts of human filth enclosed in tattered skin, a landscape of dismembered bodies. Any warmth or living colour had dissipated when the As had been infected. The liquid that stuck to my hands was more like muddy water than blood, and so dark it looked black in some light.
I threw a head onto the fire, its sockets eyeless and gaping. I had to turn away and take a deep breath, and was greatly comforted to see Peter doing the same.
CHAPTER 11
It was a couple of hours before the fire had completely burnt down and the Captain announced we were moving on. We had mostly just been sitting around for the first part of the afternoon, watching the fire gradually run out of fuel, occasionally talking, and the news that we were going instilled anticipation within me. I knew that, as we began our travels, the next A would be mine, or Peter’s, to kill.
I was ready. I knew I could do it.
Peter and I only had one bag each, and the others were similarly light travellers, so it wasn’t long before we were ready to move on. It was as we were waiting for the Captain’s final safety checks to be completed that it happened. Peter’s sickly pallor and stomach pains had been pushed aside in my mind by the racing thoughts of what had already happened that day and what was going to happen.
However, as we were about to leave, Peter sat down on the curb looking as though he wouldn’t be walking very far any time soon. The other four looked suitably unimpressed, and I made an apologetic gesture before going over to him, trying not to sound too angry as I spoke.
“What’s wrong?” I was trying to suppress the thought that maybe he had changed his mind and was going to run back to the woods, but when a stuttering gasp was the only response he could manage, any such thoughts disappeared.
He was bent over, arms folded across his stomach, tucking his knees close to his chest, and was unsuccessfully attempting to conceal the acuteness of the pain in his facial expression.
“Um... I think there’s something wrong!” I called out, hoping that the experience of our new companions would provide some solution.
Jeremy approached us with an odd expression on his face, the rest following him. They always moved as a pack, as if they were unconsciously watching each others’ backs.
“I think there’s something wrong, too.” To me, he sounded needlessly accusatory.
“Well, I think that much is obvious,” I replied.
“I’ve seen this before. Jade, do you remember?” He addressed his friend, ignoring my comment.
“Is... You have got to be kidding me. What the hell have you been doing all this time?” Her response seemed plain pissed off. And I had no idea why.
“Excuse me, have we done something wrong?” I asked defensively. Peter had relaxed a little and was looking in the direction of Jeremy, a distinctly pleading look on his face. Jeremy turned to me.
“What’s he been like recently?” he asked.
“What do you mean?” I replied, confused.
“Has he been well?”
“He’s been a bit down since his brother died,” I replied, glancing over at Peter, who stared back at me, “and... I guess he hasn’t eaten much in the past few days. And he did have some stomach pains this morning, and, I mean, he got quite tired walking as well...” I glanced back at Peter, who was still staring at me, a worryingly aggravated look in his eyes.
Jeremy nodded knowingly, then turned to Peter.
“You know what this is, don’t you?” Peter didn’t acknowledge him, and turned to me.
“Jen,” his voice was rough, “don’t listen to them.”
“Are you serious?” Jade threw out her arms in outrage. “How can you have stayed with her
? How could you have approached us? What are you doing here? You should have gone to a hospital, or at least found some other way. You’re putting us all in danger!”
“Jade, I think we should give him the opportunity to explain...” Jeremy hesitated, then turned back to Peter. “You better have a bloody good reason.”
“Sorry, what’s going on?” It felt like I had just walked in on them mid conversation, despite being there the whole time.
“Jen...”
“Why does he need a hospital?” I didn’t know who I was addressing.
“Shit. You really don’t know?” Jade’s expression had inexplicably turned to pity. I jumped to my feet and backed away from all of them.
“Okay, you need to tell me what the hell is going on. Peter?”
“Jen, I don’t know what they’re talking about. It’s just my stomach, it’s feeling better now...” he started.
“Shut up,” Jade snapped at him. “At least have the guts to be honest, for fuck’s sake.” Peter got up and walked over to me, attempting to block out the others. He placed his hands on my shoulders and made me look into his eyes.
“We need to go back, Jen, this isn’t going to work out.”
“It’s a bit late for going back,” Jeremy called out. “You won’t be able to run away from this, it’s inside of you...”
“Listen,” the Captain interrupted. We listened. There was a disembodied groaning reaching from around the corner of the street. We heard it grow louder. It echoed off the buildings, creating the eerie sense that we were being surrounded. “You’re going to have to continue this later.”
I disengaged myself from Peter’s grip and walked over to the others, who were already reaching for their weapons. All but Jade.
“I have an idea.” She was eyeing Peter with a worrying look on her face. “Live bait. You can prove yourself.”
“Wait, do you even remember why we left the army?” Sasha sounded disgusted at the idea.
“Sasha, we do need to test him somehow,” Jeremy reasoned. “It’s not ideal, but it will definitely give us the truth.”
“The truth?” I was still way behind.
“Well, if it’s just a stomach ache, he can fight off the A and win us all over.” Jade stalked over to Peter, and circled him tauntingly. “If not, well, you’ll see.”
My mind was racing. Of course Peter would fight it off. What did they expect him to do?
“I still don’t think this is the way to do it. The practice of live baiting...” Sasha began.
“Sasha, lighten up! This is different. We won’t let him get eaten.” Jade sounded very confident of this. I looked at Sasha, who didn’t look so sure. She noticed my unenthusiastic gaze.
“One of the reasons we left the army was that they began to use innocent people to draw the As together so they could kill them en masse,” she explained. “The only problem was the bait usually ended up getting killed...”
“This is ridiculous. Jen, we are leaving. These people are obviously crazy, bitter, army dropouts.” The spite in his voice was unexpected and uncharacteristic. In fact, it was what made me decide to say:
“Do it. What have you got to lose? You can kill As easily.”
“Jen, you don’t understand.” There was something of wild desperation in his eyes. “They want to use me as bait, I could...”
“But you won’t.” I looked him in the eye. “You can do this. Think of Freddie.” This was when Jade grabbed his wrist and propelled him in the direction of the A, who had rounded the corner at that moment.
He turned to look back at us for a second, pain and realisation painting his face. I watched as he walked slowly down the street, straight towards the A.
The A itself stumbled towards us, running as fast as its legs would allow it. It looked as though it hadn’t quite got the hang of using them yet. Its arms flailed and bounced with each step, but its head was facing straight, and its eyes were fixed on us. The sounds coming from its mouth were guttural, as if it were choking on air and saliva. The sound got more terrible as it drew nearer.
As the two figures came closer together, neither seemed to acknowledge the others presence. Peter and the A both kept on walking in a straight line, or in as straight a line as the A could manage. We collectively held our breath, mine in fear, Jade’s in excitement and Jeremy’s in anticipation. Peter had nothing to arm himself with.
It was hard to judge the distance between them from behind, but I remember thinking that it didn’t matter, when they were close enough, Peter would lash out. That’s probably why it didn’t really register when the A passed Peter, and was coming closer to us ignoring Peter. I cannot recall the exact moment, but it must have side stepped him and put itself between us and Peter. After that, things happened in a blur.
The Captain raised her rifle and fired three times at the As head, bringing it to the ground faster than the A had probably ever moved. Then there was nothing blocking us from Peter, who stood straight and stoic. Us and him. Two sides.
Jade coughed for dramatic effect and spoke:
“And there we have it, he’s a...”
“Shut up! I only met you five minutes ago. Let me talk,” Peter screamed at her before she could finish her sentence. “We still have time.”
He took a few steps towards us and stopped promptly when the Captain raised her gun to point at him.
“That’s close enough.” She spoke quietly but with authority. Raising his hands he nodded. Then, pausing for a few seconds, arranging his words, he continued.
“You might remember that though the disease was seemingly random, it did have one distinct pattern. There was no source, but like any other infection, if potentials come into contact with As, the infected, they would get sick. Those who were susceptible to the disease could catch it, but equally, if they didn’t encounter any carrier of the disease, they could avoid falling ill.”
“So?” The logical part of my brain was gently poking at my consciousness, but it couldn’t be the explanation. It wasn’t.
“But... Your scar...”
“You just saw for yourself!” Jade shouted at me. “Potentials don’t exist to As! They don’t have the scent that we do, the smell that drives As crazy!”
“Let me explain!” Peter yelled over her. “Jen, I am so sorry, I couldn’t do it. There was no doctor and I had Freddie to look after, I couldn’t do it by myself, I tried, but I couldn’t cut deep enough and there was no one to help. I thought if we lived far away from any civilisation I could last long enough to look after Freddie, to teach him how to survive. The scar was like security, so I could show anybody who might have asked awkward questions.” His excuses were pouring from his mouth. Excuses, a pretty word for lies. Lies you tell yourself to justify other lies. Lies lies lies.
“You lied.” I stared directly into his eyes. His stupid, crying eyes. His eyes that I could no longer trust. His sincere eyes that I could no longer believe.
“Jen, I had to. Freddie had no one else.”
“You lied to him.”
“He needed me.” Silence.
“That... shit. It was our fault. That’s why it got Freddie. It didn’t smell me because you were so close to me.” Realisation flooded my mind like a nosebleed. It hit me like cold water down my back. The shock made me feel physically sick.
“Jen, please.” He made an attempt to step forwards, but a sharp jerk of the gun by the Captain put him in his place.
“It was because of you. If we hadn’t have shared a blanket, he might still be here. It was your fault,” I told him. I said it so he wouldn’t be able to deny it, or to find another excuse.
“Jen...” He sounded like he was crying, though I know not whether from guilt, self pity or pain. He let out a small whining sound and gripped his side again, trying not to bend over too much. The Captain lowered her pistol ever so slightly.
“Please, you can still help me. I... I know I don’t deserve it,” he cried out in pain. Sasha turned away.
“
Jeremy,” she appealed, “Do you not think we should give him a chance? We can’t just let it take him over like this.” She winced as he whimpered again. I listened for a response with detached interest. I had already made up my mind.
“I don’t know. I mean, he is still human.” Jeremy glanced at me, then at Jade.
“Well, I think I’ve made it clear where I stand,” she said contemptuously. He looked at the Captain and asked:
“Do we have the equipment?”
“We could probably manage, but in all seriousness, I think he’s too far gone.” Peter was now howling nonsensically, no longer concerned about the gun pointed at him, but the disease that was clawing its way through his blood stream.
I felt Sasha’s hand on my arm. Jeremy hovered behind her. The Captain had lowered her gun, and even Jade was looking a little regretful. I gently shrugged her off.
“Jenna, I think you know what has to happen. You can look away.”
I nodded, but did not do what she had suggested. Instead, my feet carried me over to where the Captain was standing.
“We had a pact,” I said to her, and took aim.
Peter looked up, and even in that moment, I could see it taking over his eyes. It was like two rivers converging, swirling in two separate shades of murky darkness, one slowly engulfing the other.
I shot him once. I shot him just above his right hip. Target practise had evidently paid off. There was a particularly satisfying burst of liquid as the bullet made impact, ripping through that useless organ. Viscous black blood poured out of him onto the street, like pure poison.
It was unnatural, and blended with the concrete perfectly. I was certain then that the human race had brought this affliction upon itself, just as we had blocked out grass and life with the roads and buildings we built. And I was certain, if only we could get rid of every trace of the disease, we could survive.
Someone handed me a piece of material, which I secured round my arm. It was a deep shade of burgundy. The colour of dried blood.