Chapter 13
Waking in yet another strange bed seemed almost normal to Connie. All those inn beds on the road, then the strange one at Cratchitt’s, then at Mother Dawkins’s. Now here.
This was by far the most luxurious. After meeting Julius and Helena yesterday, Helena had taken her to her room and called her own formidable maid, Marsden. Together with Saxton, they measured her and decided what colors she should order. Her protests that the gowns would be too costly, that she couldn’t take this fell on deaf ears. Saxton was thrilled and Helena told her she needed them if she was to take her proper part in society, so she succumbed and settled to enjoying the experience.
That night, at dinner, it was only Helena, Julius and Connie. “I’ve sent Alex away,” Julius said. “I want to get to know you, Connie, and with him acting the perfect knight, that’s hard to do.”
A civilized conversation later and they understood each other much better. They enjoyed similar books, and Julius kept the conversation ranging widely over subjects that had Connie believing that at least one of her dreams would come true, and she’d get to see some of the sights before she went home.
However one matter raised contention. After the footmen had brought in some delicacies to complete the meal, Julius dismissed the servants.
As Julius helped Connie to a slice of almond tart, he commented, “You must get your wardrobe in train. I believe the bawd stole what you had?”
“Indeed, but I am here as myself, so I need not spend too much on replacements.” She wanted no further subterfuge, no pretending she was more than a country widow come to visit friends in town.
“We must make a splash,” Helena put in. “Everybody must know you’re my dear friend and our protégée. You need the support of our family.”
“Alex is rallying them as we speak, letting them know you’re here. I’ll join him later to support what he’s saying. We won’t tell them everything, only that you came to town to visit us and the Downhollands are your godparents. And that Jasper Dankworth has betrayed you by affiancing himself to another woman. Do not concern yourself, Connie, he won’t tell them the other secrets.”
Connie wasn’t sure she wanted anyone to know even that much, but she was learning just how close the Emperors were. “But I thought I just had to show myself—“
“We plan to take you to some of the most exclusive affairs in London,” Julius said calmly, evidently unaware of the terror he was evoking in his guest. “You must have the wardrobe to suit.”
Helena clapped her hands. “I have had the most delicious idea! I will sort the gowns that I have bought and not worn and my maid will make some of them over for you.”
“Oh, I couldn’t possibly—”
“Connie, please,” Julius said. He gave Connie such a pathetic look that she burst out laughing. “The house is crammed with my sister’s gowns, many of them unsuitable for her, bought on a whim. I have begged her to sort them out, but she will not have it.”
Connie bit her lip. Of course, the allure of new clothes appealed to her, but she couldn’t possibly take them. On the other hand, they were right. She needed something to stand out in the highest of society. An idea struck her. “We are of similar build. I could purchase them from you.” Even second hand, the kind of gowns Lady Helena wore, and so far, today she’d seen two exquisite ones, would ruin her. So be it. Better to be ruined buying gowns than have her reputation shredded. At least she’d get something from them.
“If you insist, we’ll call them a loan,” Helena said, her eyes dancing, “but in truth, it means I can go shopping for more. Your coloring will suit the colors much better than I do. I am somewhat of a magpie. If it’s shiny, I buy it. I’ll send my maid to you with a selection after dinner. Better still, come to my room and we’ll decide together.”
“Don’t you have a ball or something to attend?”
Helena waved her concerns away with a careless wave of her hand. “Pooh, this is much more fun!”
Later, in Helena’s bedroom, Connie surveyed the plethora of gowns thrown carelessly on the bed and nearly passed out from shock. She couldn’t possibly take even half of these.
“Aren’t they too grand for a poor country widow?” she protested.
“Not if you want to make a splash,” Helena picked up a dark green gown that flashed as she moved the fabric. The dull satin background only served to emphasize the decoration. “This never suited me. I look like a dowd because this green is too dark for me. It would become you admirably.” Ignoring Connie’s protests that she had more than sufficient, Helena added the gown to the growing pile.
“You won’t find much occasion to wear fine gowns in Cumbria, I suppose. But you’ll need them here.” Connie smiled. She liked Helena. Perhaps they could remain friends once this sorry episode was over and Jasper no longer a threat in her life.
So at the end of the day Connie found herself with two new friends and a new, dazzling, wardrobe, most of which she’d persuaded Lady Helena to loan her. And far fewer than the ones her ladyship wanted to give her in the first place.
She went to bed and slept the sleep of the just, waking in the morning to a brand new world.
Connie folded her hands behind her head and stared at the embroidered canopy above her. Goose feathers made for better sleep than a rope bed and a thin feather mattress. That was for sure. But she suspected that a certain relief also added to her dreamless sleep last night. She was doing something. At last, she could act instead of being the recipient of acts committed against her.
And strange though it might seem, she missed her bed partner. Missed rolling over straight into Alex’s arms. Foolish in the extreme, considering their brief, though glorious history. And she’d turned him down? Sheer madness but necessary madness. If he came to her again, which she very much doubted, it had to be as a man wanting a woman, not as a man rescuing a woman. What she’d shared with Alex had been inevitable, rare and sweet. Even if she’d only had the one kiss, the one in the library at the Dankworth’s, that would have sufficed for some time. But she had so much more now.
A knock on the door preceded the entrance of her maid bearing a large tray, which introduced the scent of food and tea into the room. Connie hadn’t realized how hungry she was until she smelled that heavenly aroma.
“If’n it please you, missus but Lady Helena says if you feel up to it would you like to accompany her to the mantua-maker this morning? And she’d like to stop at the Exchange and visit a toyshop she’s fond of.”
Toyshops sold expensive trinkets. Connie doubted she could afford any of the goods on offer but she guessed this was her first test in society.
Today’s gown was a lovely green silk, cut in the latest mode, with a petticoat of palest pink. She’d sent a fine cap, barely a wisp of lace and double ruffles. Unfortunately, Connie took a larger shoe size than Helena but her outdoor shoes would, if not match the gown, at least not offend if she wore them. And the day was fine enough to wear a shawl and leave off a cloak. A straw bergére hat, with a bunch of ribbon sewn on to the brim would go with it.
After eating, she got out of bed, stripped and Saxton helped her wash. She put on her shift and a pair of stays before she sat at the dressing table for Saxton to pin up her hair.
Then came the gown. So light, so pretty, Connie caught her breath when she stood before the mirror and viewed herself, turning in delight to view the deep box pleats at the back, which flowed nearly to the floor. She was surprised that Saxton didn’t have to take the gown up a little but the maid explained that she’d already done so.
Thinking no more about it, she had Saxton pin her hat in place and found her gloves and fan.
Her heart beating hard in anticipation, she went downstairs to find her hostess similarly attired but in blue. Helena had an effortless elegance Connie admired, because it was something all her own and either bred into her or developed so long ago she didn’t have to think about it. Connie should develop something similar, something that belonged
to her alone. If the next few days had their required effect, she might have the time to do so. But she had a fight on her hands, ladylike though it would be.
Helena led the way to an open landau outside, two gorgeous grey horses champing at the bit, a smartly attired coachman at the front and two liveried footmen behind. They climbed into the low-bodied, open topped carriage and set off.
Despite her worries, Connie enjoyed the drive into the city. Even if no one had told her they were travelling through the fashionable part of London, she’d have known from the general air of prosperity and cleanliness, although the streets and squares weren’t devoid of the shabbier element. Boys darted from one person to another, begging, selling, probably picking pockets and street sellers bawled their wares in none-too-tuneful voices. Somehow, the combined effect of street sellers, horses and chat sounded like sweet harmony. The deep bass tones of a chair mender combined with the high-pitched call of a milkmaid to provide something Connie had rarely heard. Of course, she’d visited big towns before but London was in a position of its own and she began to believe what she’d heard—nothing like it existed anywhere else.
Helena was smiling. “You remind me of the time I first visited London. It was after I came to live with Julius, so I had a somewhat interesting introduction. I had to attend court. It’s beastly hot and the clothes you have to wear are simply hideous. London astounded me. I truly believe there’s nothing like it anywhere else.”
“Not as big, certainly.” Connie would dearly love to travel, to see more of the world but she’d always assumed she’d have to content herself by reading about it. “I need to write to my godfather to tell him the state of affairs, when I can do so, although I believe Alex is writing, or has already done so. He will be distressed that Jasper has done his best to ruin me.” She frowned. “I don’t know if Lord Downholland will believe me, though. Jasper is his nephew and my godfather’s designated heir.”
Helena touched her hand. “I’m sure he’ll know who is telling the truth. You must hide nothing from him and be completely honest.”
They rode in silence until they turned a corner so smoothly that Connie hardly felt the movement. “This landau has marvelous suspension.”
Helena smiled. “Yes it does. Julius never buys anything except the best.”
“I feel the same way. If I can’t afford the best, then I do without it. I don’t have as much, that’s all.” She and Helena shared a smile before the carriage arrived at the Royal Exchange.
A place for business, where men stood in small groups together on the ground floor making deals that could affect hundreds of people and cost thousands of pounds but, as Connie soon discovered, a place that also held some beautiful shops. The Exchange was built around an open courtyard and although historically placed, this edifice was relatively new. Something she felt glad of, because the open cloister-like corridors needed good support.
She forgot her fears when she saw the shops. She’d have been happy window-shopping but Helena led her to several places where the goods were affordable and of excellent quality. Connie had a small sum of money she’d allowed Alex to lend her, a sum she would make up when she returned home, so she could afford a fan at one place and some new silk stockings at another, not much higher priced than she would have paid in York or Lancaster. With a sturdy footman following to hold the packages for them, they had little concern about overburdening themselves.
Helena proved a discerning buyer but did select a breathtaking porcelain snuffbox for her brother, with a painting of a beautiful house on the porcelain lid and pearls studded around the gold frame containing it. “That looks very much like his house in Berkshire,” she remarked, “And Julius collects snuffboxes. He says he takes snuff, though a small quantity lasts him an inordinate amount of time. It gives him something elegant to do with his hands.”
They left the shop and Helena handed the small package to the footman. She stilled and watched someone approach. “Oh lord,” she muttered but kept her mask of perfect contentment. A very small woman of around fifty-five or sixty, thin as a rake and with a face set into hard lines but she had blue eyes that seemed familiar. Julius and Helena had eyes of that startling bright blue. Was this the formidable Duchess of Kirkburton?
Helena swept a curtsey. The newcomer gave Helena a sharp nod and then turned enquiringly to her. “We have a houseguest,” Helena murmured. “Mother, may I introduce you to Mrs. Constance Rattigan?”
The gaze snapped away, the woman glanced back at Helena, gave her a curt, “Good day,” and swept off, holding her skirts to one side so she would not come into contact with Connie.
Tears sprang to Connie’s eyes but she determinedly blinked them away. Her anger grew as what the duchess had done to her sank in, surging deep and hot in her veins. “I’m assuming that was the cut direct.”
“It was indeed.” Helena was tight-lipped, her eyes sparkling. “She’s insufferable. Absolutely insufferable. You’re fortunate that you only have to encounter her once or twice.” She stared ahead, her bosom rising and falling as she breathed deeply. “I will make this right and she will acknowledge you. I swear it.”
“No, you said I might have to expect…” Connie tailed off as Alex’s dark figure vividly clad in scarlet heading her direction. Alex, it was Alex. Like a child, her excitement flooded her whole being.
Alex smiled affably and bowed over her hand. He had to take it, because she forgot to hold it out to him. His lips grazed the back of her hand like a healing touch, warming her whole body and bringing it back to life. He bowed to Helena then but stayed by Connie’s side and crooked his arm for her to take.
Helena gave a low, hardly audible whistle. The sound startled Connie. Helena looked so respectable and she could have sworn Helena’s lips hadn’t moved. “Very partial, Alex.”
“I mean it that way.”
Connie followed their reasoning a little while after. “You should have greeted Helena first, shouldn’t you? She’s higher ranking than I am.”
“What he did,” Helena said calmly, “Is declare his intent. Done in a place like this, there’s no mistaking it.”
“No, you must not!” Connie would have snatched her hand away but he put his free hand on top of it, stopping her. To anyone watching it would appear a fond gesture but he held her securely.
“I don’t want you to do this,” she protested.
He guided her past a couple too busy conversing to notice anyone approaching them. “Too late. I intend to court you publicly and unmistakably. You may refuse me if you wish but I will do it.”
Helena outlined the duchess’s social cut and Alex’s lips thinned. “Speak to Julius. He’ll handle her. By God, if he does not, I will.”
He smiled as he strolled, his feet clumping over the wooden boards that made up the walkways. “My mother was a kind, gentle soul. I would have loved her to know you, Connie.”
Alex escorted them for the rest of their shopping trip and everyone else they met gave Connie a civil bow and made polite conversation. She knew how to play that game. She was less sure how to deter Alex’s gallantry and his evident attraction to her, an attraction he made clear to everyone they met, merely by a glance or a touch.
Matters were getting out of hand but moving away might give the message that she didn’t want him and she couldn’t do that, either. Because that would be a lie.
In one shop, Alex bought an exceptionally pretty fan and presented it to Connie with a bow. “I’d be honored if you’d accept this.”
Her first instinct was to refuse such a costly gift but that would have been churlish. She smiled and took the package, holding it herself instead of passing it on to the footman. “Th-thank you. You should not.”
“Yes I should. It will give me pleasure to see you use it. It’s a mere token.”
She was so weak where he was concerned. When he touched her, she wanted to move closer and her eyes at least must be betraying her emotions. She tried to keep every other reaction to herself but
she wasn’t as accomplished as her new friend.
They completed their purchases and took another tour of the second floor of the Exchange, before Alex took them back to their carriage. He paid particular attention to Connie, murmuring society secrets, explaining who people were and how they fit into London society.
They were people, not just caricatures, as she’d tended to think of them before. She’d read about them in gossip sheets and newspapers but now, thanks to Alex, they became living, breathing people, just like her.
Back at the house, in the privacy of her bedroom, she unwrapped her gift. The fan was perfectly lovely, a design of lovers painted onto its fragile surface, the sticks made of pierced ivory. Brilliants sparkled on the outer sticks and at places in the design. So pretty, she dreaded to think of the cost. But that, she was learning, would be provincial thinking. If she rejected his suit, she could send back his gifts but he probably wouldn’t take them.
She couldn’t understand why she was doing this, playing with fire. Last night she’d ached for him and now she longed to see him again. Tomorrow night, he’d said, if they attended the ball at Lady Tremayne’s. Helena had said of course they would, that it was one of the highlights of the season.
If she were to re-establish her good name and put an end to any claim Jasper might make on her estate she had to go through with this. But she shouldn’t encourage Alex. He wanted her, he’d shown that in those glorious two days at the whorehouse but she couldn’t let him. She couldn’t bring him what he had the right to expect as a bride. She had little influence, no powerful relatives and only a modest fortune.
Status and influence were important to this class. They ruled the country. They had to be strong. But none of the common sense she prided herself on came to her aid.
She still wanted him.
Chapter 14
After spending an agreeable hour with Connie and Helena, Alex took his leave and went to White’s to join Julius in a positively sunny frame of mind.
At last he’d found a woman who didn’t bore him and who he found exciting in bed. He hadn’t planned to test that last part, though. He smiled at the memory of the way she’d seduced him. He wanted her again and again. His cock rose and it took a lot of hasty thinking about the practicalities of their dilemma to will it back into sleep again.
Rogue in Red Velvet Page 16