Arthur felt the intoxicating feeling of relief and joy when he held her hand in his. There they stood next to each other, both looking peacefully over the garden while they leaned down on the waist-high railing.
“This is my favorite view,” said Dani. “I come here often to look over the land and from here I can see everything. This is what life was meant to be like Arthur—life was meant to be lived with an eye towards the ground, but from a body that stands in the heavens. This is what it must be like for you when you look out from the tower in your castle.” Dani leaned down towards Arthur and placed her head onto his shoulders. Her hair wound itself around Arthur’s neck, back, and shoulder. Arthur smiled softly and quietly so that she wouldn’t notice.
This one moment was more amazing than any moment Arthur had ever experienced. This woman, this independent, strong, beautiful woman that Arthur had not even known for a full day; it was this woman who now seemed to want him, need him, and love him. With her head on his shoulders he felt her defenses fall to him. He felt her dependency on him. Her skin was warm and her face seemed to radiate a powerfully mesmerizing glow. “The sun will be rising soon Arthur, and we may stand here together and watch it rise. The time is soon at hand that the future of the kingdom will be secure.”
Arthur wrapped his arm around her waist. He held her body firmly in his grasp and didn’t want to let go. It felt so right to him, for his arm to be around her and her to be with him, as if destiny had finally completed its mission. In this moment all of Arthur’s worries, all of his pains, and all of the preoccupations he had for his old life and kingdom had all of sudden disappeared, now filled with only one thing—the memory of, his focus on, and his devotion towards this woman who now seemed to acknowledge that he was her hero.
So it was that these former adversaries now stood with heads and arms locked together, staring out over the garden landscape. There the two of them watched the sun slowly rise. Not one of them moved, and it seemed as if both of them wanted this one moment to last forever.
******
But, of course, the moment couldn’t last forever, and after the sun was completely revealed Dani instructed Arthur to descend back down to his living quarters, change, and then prepare for a lunch to be served that day. Arthur agreed and slowly let go of her hand as she descended back downstairs.
There, once in his room, he cheered for joy. Arthur dressed himself there in the privacy of his room and, once dressed, he navigated himself towards his balcony where there he relaxed and stared out over the garden.
But, as could be supposed by any tale such as this, the happy ending is not so near, for the view he had in those moments was not as he supposed. The garden was the same, yes, and the workers slaving in the garden were the same as usual—decrepit, ugly, and miserable. But this was not what disturbed him. There, in the garden, he saw Dani walking, but she was not walking alone. Instead, there was some mysterious, shadowy figure walking besides her.
At no other time did Arthur more hope that his eyes deceived him, that what he saw in those moments was caused by exhaustion from a long journey, or by any other plausible and logical means. Arthur more than ever wanted to explain away what he saw in that moment. But he couldn’t. He knew what he saw, and after looking down several times he knew he could not deny it. Dani was there, with her hair down and flowing in the wind, laughing and holding hands with someone else. The figure was clothed entirely in black with a hood covering his head (for Arthur assumed it was a man). He looked to be about as big as Arthur and moved very slowly like a monk would down the chapel aisle; but he also seemed to walk very carefree much like he had seen in Dani previously.
“Who is this man?” thought Arthur to himself several times.
Whoever it was didn’t matter. Arthur suddenly felt within his soul an anger emerge more potent and vivid than he had ever experienced. And it was this anger that drove his heart, plunging it into a perpetual state of anger. He wanted to, in that moment, kill the man no matter who he was. Was it jealousy? Was it fear? Arthur didn’t know, but what he did know was that he felt like an idiot to have given himself so to this woman.
For several minutes Arthur watched Dani and her mysterious man as they held hands tightly and strolled through the garden. She seemed to jump up and all around like a ballerina.
Arthur watched as the mysterious man suddenly stopped nearby an apple tree and from there plucked an apple and gave it to Dani, who smiled, laughed, and took a bite out of it. There was some kind of discourse between the two of them, but Arthur couldn’t hear them from that distance and he was grateful he was far away because he didn’t want to be seen watching them.
Although it was painful for Arthur to look he couldn’t find strength within himself to turn away. In some way the pain of the experience was not near as powerful as the motivation he had to discover the truth. He waited and waited for the mysterious figure to remove his hood, but he didn’t. Instead Arthur forced himself to watch them for nearly an hour from his balcony. He watched as they looked at each other, smiled, laughed, and then, to Arthur’s dismay, kissed more passionately than he had ever seen a couple kiss.
Arthur’s heart sank. He stood there, above the two lovers, watching painfully as every second he wished he could jump off the balcony and tear them apart. But he knew he couldn’t. He knew who he was…he was king…king of Camelot. And as king he knew that his authority could be used for terrible evil and he never wanted to force anyone to do anything. But in his heart he was now beginning to question everything that he once knew. Was he really a great king? Would a woman ever do this to a great, noble king? Arthur finally watched as the young couple parted from each other, with Dani retreating back towards the palace and the mysterious man moving back down towards the stables. It was over now, but Arthur didn’t feel any better.
Arthur could finally back away. His hand reached over his heart and clutched hard onto his shirt until he fell backward onto his bed, leaving him to stare up towards the ceiling. He tried to take deep breaths, but it was no use. His heart was still racing. He knew what he knew and, although he now wanted to erase the memories simply to erase the pain, he knew he couldn’t. He was still just too weak.
Arthur was not the type of person to love just “any” woman. He was not a perfect man by any means, but he felt himself a good man. He always had respect for women and their ways, but now that respect seemed to be disappearing. Did he really deserve this? He wondered in his mind and heart how a woman, seemingly so wonderful, righteous, and beautiful could do something so evil to have their love mean nothing. Dani’s walk was so innocent, as if she were naturally so righteous that she deserved to be worshiped by all men. How could a woman not have any sense of guilt in this? It baffled him and plagued his mind, while also piercing his heart.
But despite all of Arthur’s pain at this time, he needed to discover the truth. He would not retreat from this woman, nor would he confront her directly. Instead, he would allow time to pass to give her the opportunity to confess. He would let her tell him of her dealings with this other man. So Arthur then devised a plan; it wasn’t a complicated plan, but it was a plan nonetheless, a plan to hopefully still allow him to retain his dignity as king and hers as, he still hoped, future queen.
******
It was only a matter of time before lunch was ready and had been prepared that Dani requested that Arthur come down to the dining room for lunch. The meal was elaborate, this time in addition to fruits, with many different kinds of meats scattered along the table. “I thought that you didn’t like meat,” said Arthur.
“Oh, but you do. And plus, today is a special day!”
“Why?” asked Arthur as he took a bite out of his meat.
“Because you have returned. And because we get to be together! You are so amazing Arthur and all I desire is for you to be with me. You are the king that I have never had.”
Arthur laughed to himself. Her words were so hypocritical, so evil. How could such a beautiful and
seemingly virtuous woman so deceive?
“Really,” replied Arthur, “well then it would not surprise you to know that, as king, I am still preoccupied with the state of my kingdom—a state, I might add, that is not getting any better. In fact, my kingdom is getting worse and worse. The forests are growing darker and I feel my people are growing my desperate. And as king I cannot simply remain up here with you while they suffer.”
“Suffer indeed,” replied Dani. “But Arthur, this is not your fault! Your people are to blame. If you wish to solve this problem you have to go to them and correct them, if that’s even possible.”
“Tell me Dani,” said Arthur in a demanding tone of voice. “What do you normally do around the palace all day? I am sure it must get boring, not having anything to do because your servants do all your work for you. You don’t have to do anything around the palace. Your servants keep the garden healthy, your mansion clean, and your plates full. Tell me, what do you do?”
Arthur looked her in the eye, hoping that it would trigger a response, at least some glimpse of the truth he felt she knew but resisted in disclosing, but once again all that came out were insidious lies.
“I have much to do!” exclaimed Dani. “I am queen of this land. I make sure that everything goes as it should. You may say that I keep the order here just as you keep the order over your kingdom.”
Arthur sighed. He knew that she was not going to reveal the answer openly. His mind then was drawn to the one forbidden room on the basement level. His eyes perked up and he asked, “So what is in the room downstairs in the basement? Why is it forbidden?”
“It is forbidden for your own good Arthur. You see, there are some things that men should not know—some truths that are best left hidden for the sake of all men and, more in particular, for the sake of the world.”
“And is that one of those?”
“Yes,” replied Dani confidently. “Please just trust me Arthur. The room would be your downfall should you enter. It possesses a truth too harsh for you to bear.”
Arthur suddenly stopped eating, but felt that he had done too much pestering already to reveal the fact that he saw Dani with someone else walking in the garden. So the rest of the lunch was one of relative calmness and silence. Dani left the dinner gleefully holding Arthur’s hand and, although suspicious, Arthur didn’t retract his hands from hers. Somehow he still felt like he liked her touch. To him her touch was an insidious, but nevertheless delicious and addictive poison.
******
The next few hours of the day were spent walking among the garden with Dani. Like before Dani looked gleefully at Arthur and smiled and clung to him as if obsessed with his mere presence. The more time that passed the more he felt her transforming. It was a transformation from the strict and confident woman to a young flirty school-girl. But Arthur realized now that perhaps this was all part of her ingenious plan to get him to fall for her.
Arthur never dealt with a woman like this. Guinevere was so truthful and in her eyes there was no deception. However, at the same time the ever unpredictable movements of this woman made Arthur all the more passionate for her. He felt like he was addicted to her. He was addicted to figuring her out, to understanding, at least in part, how to gain the womanly power she possessed. To Arthur it was now a game—a sick, twisted, and evil game—but a game nonetheless.
And Arthur could no longer deny the fact that this woman did possess some terrifying power over the hearts of men. He knew she was still wise and tactful, but that she only made herself appear weaker and less intelligent because she knew this is what Arthur wanted. And somehow he suspected that Dani knew this, which is why the longer they were together the more she let him decide what to do and where to walk, and the more that she seemed to cleave to him, as if she were offering herself and her body willing to him with no cost. It was as if Dani were saying to him, “Do with me as you please for we are in paradise and noone will know!” It was as if Dani were telling him, by the batting of her hair and eyelashes, her graceful walk, her tight clothing, her hands moving more towards his as if she were as desperately passionate and desirous for Arthur’s body as she was for his.
Although Arthur’s heart and body seemed magnetically drawn to her, he kept himself more distant from her. He no longer took her hand in his. He knew that what would most pain and surprise and perhaps even incite within her some passion for him, was, in fact, to not reciprocate this passion.
But it seemed like Dani noticed this, making her cling to Arthur even more. Arthur didn’t know what to say. Perhaps his strategy was working, or perhaps this was merely her intent. The more time passed the more confused Arthur became. Was she merely a master manipulator and deceiver or was she really having feelings for him? Arthur knew that, at one point or another he would have to believe one of these options and then act accordingly.
“Do you feel it necessary to love?” asked Arthur, trying to see if her answer would reveal more.
“Necessary to love? What do you mean?”
“I mean, what if what has occurred to the outside world is, not because of you directly, but because the world lacks true love…that somehow true love has disappeared from the world.”
“You speak deep words Arthur, words that are too deep for me to desire to understand or explain,” replied Dani. “Instead, you must remain here with me in the garden. Forget the outside world. What has befallen the outside world is not your fault and your responsibility. That part of your life has now ended. Just stay with me Arthur…please…” Dani clung to Arthur more than she ever had before. She stared up at him and peered deep into his eyes. Her eyes were mesmerizing and seemed to urge him to stay.
“I can’t,” replied Arthur. “No matter how much you appeal to me…no matter how beautiful you are, I have a kingdom to look after and there is something in my heart telling me that I must look after it.”
“So look after it from here, from the top of my palace! Stay with me always…”
Arthur wanted to accept Dani’s invitation, but the words of Merlin again returned to his mind with great strength and poignancy, “Physical beauty can only go so deep. Physical beauty may begin the true love process, but it can never complete it. No, instead, you have fallen for this woman because of something deeper. Your soul has seen something in her soul that you like. It is this bond that links you together, a bond of the soul. You have found in her a delight, a peace, a joy. But even the soul can lie, for in this lie I fear you will fall and when you fall your life will never be the same. You will be adrift, looking for answers where there are none, searching the skies for help when none will come, and, above all, you will be attempting to follow your heart when it leads you to only pain, lies, and suffering. Know that there is no sin in love, but in who we love.” Arthur then saw all of the statues and decrepit workers who were caught in her grasp and would be as long as they lived. So Arthur backed away from her and ran back up the hill towards the palace. His heart longed to be with her, but he knew he couldn’t. He couldn’t be with her…no matter how much he wanted to. So Dani stood silently watching as Arthur fled from her presence.
******
In the late afternoon Arthur woke up from his nap and strolled over to his balcony. He was still exhausted and didn’t take much time to think about the woman he had just left. But there, from the balcony, he again saw Dani in the garden walking, and again she was not alone.
The mysterious stranger was attached to her. He was clasping hard onto her body with both arms wrapped around her. The figure was again masked by a black hood hung over his head and as he walked Arthur was incited to even more anger. He watched them as they did the same thing as before, but only more intensely—exchange kisses and clasp hands.
What confused him most about Dani was the fact that her words and actions seem to tell two divergent stories. She was so seductive, selfish, and clever that she seemed to be able to get anything she wanted. But, at the same time, she was also so selfless and virtuous in what she said. So
, to him, her actions were the bitter, honest, painful truth while her words were the representation of an insidious lie. And, if there was anything that Arthur despised, it was deception.
All the powerful love that existed for Dani previously was now filled with a horrifying hatred—a hatred he had never before known could exist in his heart, or of any heart for that matter. So the entire day the hate churned within him and he prepared most carefully for his plan to be enacted.
Dani again brought Arthur downstairs for dinner, but dinner passed very quietly and uneventfully. Although Arthur was angry at this woman he did not disclose to her that he had seen her from his balcony with another man, but, instead, kept this a secret from her just like the secret man she kept from him. During dinner he acted as politely and nice as ever.
Then, when evening came, Dani went upstairs to go to sleep. Arthur bid her goodnight with nothing more than a wave. He then closed his door and pretended to go to sleep. He waited several hours there in his bed, his mind enacting in his head how he might have Dani. He knew it was within his grasp. All it required was some tact and cleverness. Ironically by the same tact, deception, cleverness, and even magic, he would bring the kingdom into balance. She would fall in love with him and then he would have her in his grasp. At last, he thought silently to himself, at last she will be mine!
So the next few hours passed with quiet anticipation, eagerly looking forward to finally ending the evil in the kingdom, making her good and his. He could imagine in these moments the reaction of the crowds of Camelot when they would see Arthur on the tower of Camelot holding Dani next to him in his arms. They would be amazed, he thought, to see me, Arthur, with a woman as grand as Dani. Poison Rose palace and the witch herself would be his! And, so sadly, Arthur’s thoughts continued to be warped, so much so that he felt that he could not live without this woman and that this woman actually was in fact “great” even though deep down he knew her to be deceptive and evil. Then he thought evil thoughts, thoughts so evil he could not imagine they were coming from him. He thought about making love to her all night, about using her to fulfill all of his carnal desires. He then thought about, after getting her to fall in love with him, using her spells against her to torture her. Arthur immediately tried to repel these thoughts, thoughts that he had never before experienced.
The Poison Rose: A King Arthur Tale Page 13