by Ash Harlow
Gail: “Tell the viewers about this mystery woman, Stella Newbold.”
It’s so weird to be discussed on national television in this context.
Reuben: “Stella’s the manager at the place I was staying.”
Gail: “Mmmkay. The picture shows a rather romantic farewell as she’s about to depart on a boat.”
Reuben [shrugs]: “What can I say? She’s a friend, and I’m demonstrative. There’s nothing more to it than that.”
Gail [giggling]: “That will be a huge relief to your female fans.”
When Reuben winks at Gail in response, and she touches her chest as if her heart needs steadying, I want to puke.
Gail: “How long are you planning to stay in New Zealand?”
Reuben: “Not long, but I’ll be back. There’s some property I’m interested in.”
Gail [panting with excitement]: “In Auckland?”
Reuben: “An island. I thought it would make a great present for my fiancée.”
Gail deflates and brings the interview to a close. I experience a similar puncture wound directly to my heart. I’m flooded with confusion and loss.
He’s a liar, and worse, he’s a cheat. That would be the real reason behind his need for secrecy on the island. It wasn’t his fans he was hiding from, it was the fact that he was engaged to be married.
I’m filled with disgust that I was ever part of this. I’ve turned my life into some sort of hell over the past four days for him, because I thought he cared about me.
No. Let’s be honest. I thought we were doing the whole insta-love thing, which I’ve now returned to its proper mythical status.
It doesn’t exist. It’s a hook-up excuse.
Even worse is that I’ve ruined my career for him. How could I be so naïve?
I’m doing my best not to hate myself, and not to cry.
Granddad stirs, and I switch off the television and go to his side. He blinks a couple of times. “Fell asleep. Did I miss anything?”
Apart from witnessing my betrayal?
“No, Granddad, you haven’t missed a thing.”
A nurse appears to bring Granddad his medication and looks a little too long and hard at me, her brow furrowing. I give her a hard stare back until she shifts her gaze.
Reuben’s fronted up and given the people who want to know, his version of events. I’m tired of ducking and hiding. From this moment on I’m standing up and facing them all. They can think what they like about me. They won’t get my version of events, but I won’t be cowed by them any longer. I intend to hold my head high and get on with my life.
Granddad’s asking me questions about the garden, what vegetables I planted, did I give them a feed of Neptune’s Gold, did I rotate the planting from last summer.
Even thinking about the garden makes my chest tight. I was planting when I first met Reuben.
“If I’m not back on the island before the next storm, make sure you gather the seaweed and—” Grandad stops.
He’s been a bit forgetful since the operation, so I wait patiently for him to gather his thoughts. Then I realise he’s looking over my shoulder.
“Well, don’t just stand there, young man. Judging by the look on your face, I expect you’re here to see my Stella.”
“I expect you’re Granddad.”
My body reacts to the sound of his voice, and I squeeze my eyes shut to stop the tears. I’ve been brave for Granddad, brave for myself, but just hearing Reuben sets my emotions tumbling so fast I don’t know which one to seize and run with.
“I am,” Granddad says. “And judging by what I heard on the television tonight, you’ve got some explaining to do.”
“Stella?”
I shake my head. I can’t even turn and look at him.
“Come with me, Stella. There’s stuff I need to tell you.”
“I’ve got nothing to say, Reuben. I think you should leave.” Damned if I’m going to listen to him justify his appalling behaviour.
“It’s not what you think, babe. Please, hear me out.”
“Go, now…if you have a shred of decency in you, you’ll leave.”
“Okay, cracker, but remember, you forced this.”
I forced this? The man’s deluded as well as a cheat. Now I’m feeling as though I’ve had a lucky escape.
“Granddad…I’m sorry, we haven’t been properly introduced—”
“Arthur Newbold,” Granddad replies.
“I’m Reuben Creed, Mr. Newbold. I’m sorry to hear about the health problems you’ve been having.”
“Please, call me Arthur…and thank you for asking. My health’s a lot better, and I expect to make a full recovery.”
Good god, it’s like I’m not even in the room. I continue to stare at the linoleum squares on the floor. This is so awkward, it’s excruciating. I’d intended on keeping the entire debacle from Granddad, and now Reuben’s ruined that, too. It’s like he’s out to completely destroy my world. Over what? One lousy photograph.
Reuben can be charming, and I’m completely pissed off that he’s even trying to butter up Granddad, because he’ll be on the next flight out of the country and out of our lives. Why he’s doing this, I have no idea, but I don’t have to sit and listen. I get to my feet and try to shove past Reuben, who’s blocking the door. I can’t even look at him, but as I try to pass, he snares my arm.
“Arthur,” Reuben continues, his voice level as I struggle to pull from his grasp. “I want you to know that over the past month I’ve fallen in love with your beautiful Ahunui.”
Great. Now he’s going to try and get Granddad to sell him the island so that Reuben’s bride-to-be has her precious love nest.
“But more than that,” he continues, “my heart’s been taken by your amazing and stunning granddaughter. I want to ask your permission to allow me to marry her.”
“You’re already engaged,” I hiss. “The entire nation knows. You announced it on television.”
“Yeah, I jumped the gun a bit there. I intended to ask you first, but I was surviving on the hope you’d say yes. Marry me, Stella. Say yes.”
“I can’t even…” What? I can’t even breathe, or think.
“I think you two need a little time to yourselves. Stella, your decision has my blessing. This old man needs his rest, so I expect you back here in the morning to give me all the details.”
I return to Granddad, and kiss him goodnight.
All of me trembles, my mouth is dry and I just might be sick.
“I’m utterly confused, Reuben,” I tell him as we walk along the corridor.
“I’m utterly in love, Stella. We need a room…some privacy, because I’m not giving up until you say yes.”
All my hurt and anger is there because I thought he was engaged and a cheat. And the reason I hurt so bad is because I’d already fashioned in my heart a life together with him. That’s what I wanted. That’s what felt right. But marrying him would mean the craziness of the last few days will become a permanent feature of my life, and I worry that we’ll break under the strain.
“Reuben, I need time to think. What I can tell you is that I love you, but these past days have been hell.”
“We’ll do it together from here on, cracker. I should have come with you to Auckland, should have protected you from all this.” He pulls my hand to his chest, pushing it beneath his shirt until it’s against his bare skin. “Feel that, Stella?”
“Yes,” I whisper. His heart is beating strong and fast beneath my palm.
“That’s yours, Stella. My heart beats for both of us, but you own it. Let me protect you forever.”
“My heart is yours, too, Reuben.”
He ducks down by my ear. “I want to put my hand on yours, but that nurse over there will think I’m copping a feel. I need to get inside you, babe. Please, tell me you live close by.”
“Twelve minutes if the traffic’s clear.”
“That’s twelve minutes too long. Let’s find a broom closet.”
&nb
sp; I giggle, then stop him because we’ve reached the main doors. “Are you ready for this?” I ask.
“I can’t fucking wait,” Reuben says.
The automatic doors glide open, and we step out to the street. There is a bunch of photographers, and the camera flashes blind me for a moment.
Reuben holds up his hand and gets their attention, along with that of anyone else leaving the building.
“Guys, I’m going to give you the scoop of your life, and then we want some peace. Not going to take questions, so listen up. I’d like you to meet my fiancée, Stella Newbold. She’s my bright star, and she’s just agreed to marry me. Now we’d like some privacy so that we can celebrate. I don’t want to see any of you tomorrow, so respect that, please.”
I tug his hand. “Did I agree to marry you?”
“Of course you did, I can’t believe you’ve forgotten that already. Now come on, a kiss for the mob, and then we’ll get naked. I’m starving; I’ve been too long away from your pussy.”
“Reuben, behave. Some of them probably lip-read,” I say, but he silences me with his kiss.
The flashbulbs burst into life again, and there’s cheering. We break apart, and Reuben tugs me towards a waiting taxi.
18 ~ REUBEN
“Can I fuck you, Stella?” I ask. I’m stroking between her legs, where her pussy drips with need.
We’ve been in her tiny apartment for a couple of hours. It’s raining, which feels appropriate. Despite being desperate to be inside her, we had to talk. The shit Stella’s been through for the past few days is normal for me, but her life has been upended. She needed to get a lot off her chest.
We lay together on the bed as she talked, and I slowly undressed her over that two hours. It was like unwrapping my gift all over again.
I talked, too, between kisses and caresses. I sucked her nipples until they were tight, sensitive buds, pulling them between my teeth so that her conversation was punctuated by gasps.
I kissed her neck and her ears, inhaling her words and her scent so that everything mingled. She cried and laughed, and my mouth never left her body, all my words spoken into her skin so that she absorbed them forever.
I slapped her gorgeous ass when she confessed to doubting me and everything we’d done together on the island.
“Yes, Reuben, fuck me,” she says.
“Do you have condoms?”
“Do we need them?”
Her question sends a rush of adrenaline through me. “No, we don’t need them. I want you to have our baby, Stella, lots of times.”
“Define ‘lots’,” she says as I slide my cock into her.
“As many as you want,” I tell her. Fuck, her pussy is glorious. Four days away from it and it feels like years. Bareback is almost more than I can handle. I slide out through the heat and drive back into her, over and over. I’m so close to coming, but I want her with me.
“You’re nearly there, babe,” I say. Her pussy’s been pulsing over my cock for the last few thrusts.
“Yes,” she pants. “Yes, Reuben, right there.”
“I’m going to come soon,” I warn.
“I could get pregnant…the time is right.”
Her words make me explode. I drive deep until I touch the very end of her, making her groan. Her back arches off the bed as she climaxes, calling out my name, telling me she loves me, and in that moment, I still at the very depth of her, pumping her full of my cum. Her pussy pulses, over and over, milking me dry.
“Marry me, Stella.” I have to say it again because she was right, she didn’t give me an answer at the hospital.
“Yes, Reuben, I will.”
EPILOGUE ~ STELLA
“Orion, come here, sweetheart, I want you to wear these shoes.”
My four-year-old raven-haired son scowls at me. He is, to put it mildly, feral. Born on the island, and delivered by his father, because our first-born was in such a darned hurry to get into this world.
There was no time to get over to the mainland once he decided he wanted out.
From birth, he has planted himself in this earth and refused to let go. And he prefers to feel that earth beneath his bare feet, no matter what the weather or season.
He wants to go up to Granddad’s house by himself today. Reuben still complains about the ‘rustic’ path, but his entire family can make it up the track and back without trouble, so I don’t see why we should mess with the landscape and add the paved steps and handrail he thinks we need.
Reuben thinks it would be a good idea for Granddad, but the fact is, even at eighty-four, Granddad could walk that path blindfolded.
We both know every bump and hollow, every sharp twist and gentle curve, the hump where a searching root from the ancient pohutukawa tree has swelled the earth, the rock we have to skirt around.
Of course, Orion goes straight over that rock.
Landscape with paving stones and we’ll all be tripping and breaking legs in a day. I want the children to learn the same. Orion has done just that, and Aurora, at two and a half, is happy to toddle behind him, plump fists grabbing at the plants that edge the path, to help herself along the way.
It’s as it should be.
Aurora’s birth was a calmer affair, and although I intentionally stayed on the island, I had a proper midwife to assist.
Unlike Orion, who arrived with an impatient yell, Aurora drew a measured breath and took in everything around her. She’s in less of a hurry than Orion, but has attached herself to him like a second shadow. Orion has Reuben’s protective streak and, even at such a young age, watches out for her.
I want Orion to wear shoes because it’s the time of year the bees are about, and last week he trod on one and was stung. That’s when we discovered he’d learned to swear. I blame the guys who are here recording for that. Mouths like sewers, every one of them.
Reuben insisted on celestial names for the children.
“What, like Southern Cross and The Pot?” I’d teased. Once the children were asleep, we continued to spend many evenings on a blanket outside, watching the night sky.
“I’ve done some research. ‘The Pot’, as you call it, is more commonly known as Orion.” He’d stroked my cheek. To this day, when he’s near me, his hands are touching me. “I’ll never forget the first time we lay outside and watched the sky, the stars and satellites,” he continued. “When we saw that shooting star, your heart is what I wished for. The star shot right through the handle of The Pot, so I think Orion is the perfect name for our first baby.”
“And if our baby’s a girl?” I’d asked.
“Orioness,” Reuben replied.
I honestly couldn’t tell if he was serious, so I’d prayed with all my might for a son.
The island has a settled feeling these days, for many reasons. It’s in a trust now that guards it from mass development and will keep it safe for the future generations of our family.
We renovated Granddad’s cottage.
When he first returned to Ahunui after his operation, he stayed in the house with us. Pretty soon he was dropping hints about returning to the cottage. We gave in on the condition he let us tidy it up a bit first.
It remains in keeping with its original floorplan and cladding, but has a new roof and new facilities such as water that actually stays hot and runs in a continuous supply under good pressure.
The doors have been stripped back and rehung, as have the windows. We had some rotten cladding replaced, and painted inside and out. The small veranda was rebuilt and enlarged and has a swing for the kids, plus a couple of rockers.
Like the main house, the floor is made from six-inch-wide kauri boards. The strength of the wood means it will outlast us for generations, so we re-sanded and polished it and it’s as good as new.
Granddad also has electricity running off solar panels, but insists on using his old paraffin lamps to light the place. Apparently the light is more natural, whatever that means.
Granddad has also doubled the size of our garden,
and added hens. He jokes that all we need is a house cow and a field of wheat and we’ll be entirely self-sufficient. Reuben suggests that wouldn’t happen until we included beef and lamb. The man still loves a steak.
Reuben built a recording studio. It turned out the old building consents from the early settlers remain.
These days we get bands and artists from around the world, visiting our haven—our Eden—to make their music.
It means I’m photographing people more, documenting production and getting marvellous candid shots of the musicians relaxing after a day in the studio. But when I get a free moment, I still hike around the island and record its features in the ever-changing coastal landscape.
We’re in the process of building a lodge for the musicians to stay. At the moment, they stay with us, but as our family grows, so too does our need for space.
The musicians love the privacy of Ahunui.
They arrive, jagged and wired, and some take longer than others to settle, but they all leave with their edges smoothed and their spirits lighter. All of them so far have found it a place that enhances their creativity. Plus, they have their music made.
The children endear themselves to the visitors and have amassed an extended family of faux-aunties and uncles. They have a confident belief that everyone loves them, which makes me worry for the time when they’ll head out into the real world and discover life and friendships are not always that easy.
Reuben and I married as soon as we could when he came to Auckland for that awful interview on the television when Granddad was still in hospital. We had a civil ceremony with a couple of eager young fans off the street as witnesses.
We just had this need to connect ourselves in every sense, knowing we had the rest of our lives to learn more about each other and sort out the finer details of how we would live together. We wanted our commitment legally recorded so that nothing could pull us apart.
Since the night we left Granddad in the hospital, I’ve pretty much been pregnant. I don’t know what it is about Reuben and me, but we make babies with alarming ease. I think I was pregnant with Orion by the end of Reuben’s and my first night together in Auckland. Aurora turned up eighteen months later.