A Ranch to Call Home

by Leann Harris

  “I guess they scatter for shelter,” Joel answered.

  “Well, I know a couple cowboy churches where they have a corrugated roof and open sides,” Caleb explained. “I’ve seen several on country roads outside Midland and Abilene.”

  “Well, we shouldn’t have any problems today,” Kaye added.

  The morning couldn’t have been more perfect. The sky was a bright blue and the temperature was in the low 70s. Trees had new shoots on them, and the leaves that had appeared were a light green. A gentle breeze blew through the window.

  They pulled into a parking lot, filling with trucks. A small sign the size of a For Sale sign announced Cowboy Church services, 10:30 p.m. Charlie Newman, Preaching.

  “I think we’ve found the right place.” Gramps surveyed the parking lot. “At least we’re not going to be the only ones here. It would’ve been embarrassing, but of course, I’ve been to services when I was just a whippersnapper when it was only a handful of folks—my parents, brothers and sisters and the neighboring family.”

  Caleb also wondered how many people would be here. The small number he’d expected turned out to be closer to seventy.

  “Did you think we were going to be the only ones attending, Gramps?” Kaye asked as she followed him out of the truck.

  Gramps harrumphed.

  As they filed into the roped-off area, several cowboys nodded to them or tipped their hats. Kaye seemed to be the recipient of several hat tips.

  “Ma’am.”

  “I almost feel like I’m back in the service with all these ma’ams,” she whispered to Caleb.

  “Caleb Jensen,” a man called out. A cowboy with bowed legs slipped out of a group clustered at the front of the area. He wore a white Western shirt, pressed jeans with creases, big belt buckle and boots. Mack Lodge grasped Caleb’s hand and vigorously shook it. Mack had been on the circuit for the past couple years. The kid was an eager worker, who saw his time in rodeo as a stepping-stone to owning his own spread. “It’s good to see you, friend. We’ve been missing you on the circuit, and everyone is asking when you’re coming back. And the other pick-up guys are missing ya, too.”

  Mack’s well-meaning words were a knife in his gut, only adding to his self-doubt. He tried to smile but didn’t know if he pulled it off. “It’s good to see you, too, Mack. I’ve been taking a little time off to help a friend, Joel Kaye.” Introductions were made.

  Mack tipped his hat to Kaye. “I hope you haven’t been on the mean side of Caleb’s horse. That horse is a good athlete, but cantankerous, and I’ve sported the bruises to prove it.”

  Caleb gave Kaye a “see, I told you so” look.

  “Razor and I have become good friends.”

  Mack’s jaw went slack. He turned to Caleb. “She’s joshing me, right?”

  “No. It knocked me back on my boots, too, Mack.”

  “It’s a pleasure, ma’am, to meet you. No one will believe that story.” He backed away. “Well, hurry back, Caleb. The guy they’ve got riding now isn’t as good as you.”

  Caleb nodded but knew the accident was the talk of the circuit.

  Mack hesitated then added, “No one blames you for what happened. It was just one of those things.”

  Caleb’s heart jerked. “Thanks.”

  Caleb felt Kaye at his arm. When he looked down, she smiled her reassurance.

  A guitar started playing the song “Awesome God.” People slipped into different rows and joined in singing. Caleb followed Kaye into a row of seats. The guitarist played a couple more songs, leading the crowd in the chorus, ending with “Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus.” After the final chord died, the Reverend Newman stepped up to the lectern.

  “Welcome, folks, to our service. I see some new faces and I want you to turn and greet the person next to you, welcoming them. If you don’t know your neighbor, you’ll meet some new friends.”

  The cowboys and cowgirls turned to each other. There were only a couple people who Caleb didn’t know, but all his old friends shook his hand and told him they missed him. Their welcomes and encouragement pushed him into further turmoil. He was missed, but his guilt ate a hole in his gut. Nothing had been settled in the weeks he’d been at Joel’s ranch.

  They sat back into the folding chairs and Charlie started his sermon. “I’m glad you’re here this morning. I wanted to share with you what God laid on my heart.

  “You remember how Peter pledged to fight for Christ to the death, but when Peter was put to the test, he failed, denying Christ. Not once, but three times. You can maybe understand once, but three times?

  “Don’t you think if Jesus hadn’t confronted Peter after the resurrection, then maybe Peter’s guilt would’ve crippled him after Christ ascended?”

  As Charlie continued his message, Caleb felt the words hit him in the chest. “Peter’s not unique. We’ve all failed Christ. But does He hold it against us? No. After you’ve failed once, you think God’s going to throw you out? Peter repented and look what he accomplished after he knew he was forgiven.”

  Each word Charlie spoke added to Caleb’s discomfort. He glanced at Kaye. Charlie’s words were finding their mark there, too.

  Charlie continued his sermon about forgiving one another but that we don’t include ourselves in that forgiveness. “Folks, you need to surrender to God those fears and mistakes that are tying you up. If you try to bury them, act like nothin’s wrong, you’ll simply have to deal with them later when you dig them up, and face them.

  “Why not just give God that guilt, anger or problem now? He will guide you through the storm and help you come out on the other side. And if you think He doesn’t know, then you’re wrong.

  “So why not give it up?”

  Kaye squirmed in her chair. Caleb resisted the urge to move, but Charlie’s words grabbed him, too.

  “Let’s end the service with the song ‘Amazing Grace’ and put those cares in His hands.”

  The guitar player strummed the first chords of the song.

  Caleb knew God was dealing with him. Did God want his guilt? Was he hanging on to it?

  The congregation started filing out of the rows, greeting each other. Caleb introduced Kaye and the others to his friends. Charlie joined them. “Hope you enjoyed the service.”

  “Ah, food for thought, Reverend,” Gramps answered. “You stepped on a few toes.”

  Charlie smiled. “Good, that means God was working in those words.”

  “Reverend Charlie, you still planning on coming to the ranch for lunch?” Joel asked. “I know my sister would like to pick your brain for ideas for the charity rodeo.”

  Charlie’s face lit up. “I can’t pass up a home-cooked meal.”

  “Well, it wasn’t me that put in the roast. It was Joel. The army used to cook all my meals.”

  Charlie looked from Kaye to Joel. “Who’s to say men can’t cook? Not many women were cooks on cattle drives. Chuck wagons were known for their male cooks.”

  Frowning, Joel looked around. “I don’t know if that’s a compliment or insult.”

  “Depends on your skill,” Charlie answered. “After we put up the chairs, I can join you and follow you out to your ranch.”

  “Well, Charlie,” Gramps said, “if we all pitch in, we’ll eat sooner.”

  “I like how you think, Niall Kaye, but let the youngsters do the work.”

  Caleb was amazed that Charlie knew Gramps’s given name. Very few people called him Niall.

  They all went to work putting the chairs on the cart. Within five minutes, all signs of the service were gone and the chairs were returned to the storeroom.

  “I’m ready to eat,” Charlie announced. “You lead the way and I’ll follow.”

  As they drove back to Peaster, Charlie’s sermon rumbled around Caleb’s head.

 
Kaye leaned close and whispered, “Are you okay?”

  Wow, how the tables had turned. “Why do you ask?”

  “Because you look like I did when I ran into my ex.”

  Chapter Nine

  “Why don’t we eat out on the newly rebuilt porch and enjoy Joel’s and Caleb’s handiwork?” Kaye suggested. “We won’t have many days like this, so let’s take advantage of it.”

  The guys gave her a puzzled look.

  “There’s no furniture out there, Sis. How we going to do that? Sit cross-legged on the ground? I mean, I’m sure you did that in the army, but we’ve got a perfectly good table and chairs here in the kitchen and dining room.”

  The formal dining room table still held all the papers for the rodeo and the outside picnic table stood half charred. Kaye surveyed the group. “I have three strong cowboys here, minus Gramps, who should be able to move the kitchen table out onto the porch.”

  The men traded looks. Joel looked frustrated. Caleb’s mouth turned into a smile.

  “I like Kaye’s suggestion,” Charlie offered. “Let’s enjoy the day the Lord has given us.”

  “She’s right,” Gramps added. “It’s a nice spring afternoon. I think it’s a good idea.”

  They easily moved the kitchen table and chairs out onto the porch. Kaye handed each man plates, silverware and glasses. The food dishes came next and, within five minutes, they sat down to Sunday dinner.

  “Gramps, why don’t you say the blessing?” Joel said.

  He nodded and began, “Lord, thank You that we could gather around the bountiful table, and thank You that my grandchildren are home and we have guests. But we are most thankful that You have never forsaken us, no matter what has happened. Thank You for the bounty. Amen.”

  The prayer touched Kaye, and when she opened her eyes and saw the gathered people, she wished her mother, father and grandmother were here.

  “Hand me the rolls, Sis.” Joel’s comment interrupted her thoughts.

  “A man driven by his stomach.” She gave him the basket of rolls.

  They quickly passed around the dishes of food. “That was a good sermon you preached today, Charlie,” Gramps said again.

  Kaye stilled. Was Gramps trying to tell her something?

  Charlie nodded. “It was something God’s been dealing with me for some time. I talk to lots of cowboys out there on the circuit, and they turn their lives around, but they’re haunted by things they did or that happened in the past.” He forked a piece of meat into his mouth and chewed. “So they’re toting a bale load of grief along with them on the circuit. Instead, I want to see them laughing with joy that God has redeemed them.

  “I know when I was in my late teens, early twenties, I did my share of drinking and carousing. I ended up marrying a young lady and having twin girls.” He fell silent for a moment. “I was off rodeoing in Arizona when my house back in Abilene caught fire.”

  Kaye’s heart stopped, fearing what she’d hear next.

  “They all died in that fire. My girls and wife.” He paused.

  Everyone at the table knew Charlie’s grief.

  “I was out on a bender for six months,” Charlie quietly continued. “One day, I ended up in the graveyard sitting beside my family’s graves. It must’ve been two in the morning, and I started yelling at God. How could He allow this to happen?

  “Then I asked God why.”

  “You get an answer?” Caleb asked.

  Charlie turned his head. “No, but I knew my sweet wife and babies were in heaven. You see, she’d started going to church and had wanted me to come with her and make peace with God. She’d just dedicated the girls to the Lord that Sunday. I told her I wasn’t driving home for the service, since I was in the finals that Sunday afternoon.”

  Charlie’s story struck a chord in Kaye’s heart. Charlie had been running away from God. She understood only too well.

  “Once I gave the Lord that anger, I began to heal. I was able to be quiet with myself. Does that make sense?” He looked around the table.

  When he came to her, Kaye knew what her face would tell. “So is that when you started preaching?”

  “I saw others who needed help. I went to seminary, but when I finished, I knew the cowboys on the circuit needed ministering to, so here I am, twenty-five years later.”

  “I never knew, Charlie,” Caleb said, “about your family. I’m sorry.”

  “It’s not something a lot of folks know, but Gramps asked where the sermon this morning came from. And who knows who was in the audience today that needed that truth. God knows.”

  Kaye’s gaze met Caleb’s. The air vibrated between them.

  “So how are things on the rodeo circuit?” Caleb asked.

  “It’s going well. Mike Rogers is scoring big points with each rodeo going toward that world-championship belt buckle. He’s proud as a peacock. There’s been a couple bronc riders who’ve asked when you’re coming back. They’ve got no complaints about the other guy, but you’ve got him beat hands down. The guys have confidence in you.”

  Caleb tried to hide his reaction, but Kaye noticed the tightening of his shoulders. “I appreciate that, Charlie. And I’m glad to hear Mike’s closing in on that championship buckle.”

  Charlie’s eyes narrowed and Kaye wondered if Charlie would challenge Caleb to talk about what was eating at him. She would guess it had something to do with the accident. What happened had to be hard to live with, but didn’t Caleb realize things happen? He couldn’t control everything.

  “How’s your brother?” Charlie asked. “Has he graduated yet?”

  “He has. He got his masters last summer. He focused on business management, but his area was companies in trouble. He wanted to be a turn-around specialist focusing on rodeo and rodeo management.”

  Charlie grabbed the last roll. “I’m impressed.”

  Kaye was, too.

  “It took Sawyer’s professors a while to warm up to the idea, but when they thought about it, they realized those skills could be applied to traveling circuses or ice shows. Right now he’s evaluating a rodeo in Tyler.”

  “So what are you going to do now?” Charlie pressed. “You going to continue rodeoing?”

  “I’m thinking on it.”

  Charlie turned to Kaye. “You should’ve seen these two when they were on the circuit. Sawyer, Caleb’s younger brother, was a great rider. I think if he would’ve stayed with the rodeo, he could’ve had a championship belt buckle.”

  “I wanted Sawyer to have that degree. He can have a successful life that’s not as hard on the body.”

  Charlie swallowed the last bite of his roll. “True, Caleb. And I think that was smart of you to direct your brother that way. And Sawyer credits his big brother with the push.”

  Kaye’s heart found another reason to admire Caleb, and she realized that he’d been worming himself into her heart while she was trying to cope with the fallout here.

  “You do what you have to,” Caleb quietly answered.

  For several moments, silence reigned, punctuated with the sounds of birds chirping and a cow mooing.

  “You ready for cake?” Kaye asked. Nan had delivered it last night. If her brother didn’t tell Nan he wasn’t interested, she’d end up twenty pounds heavier.

  Charlie brightened. “Homemade?”

  “Yes.” Kaye directed her look at her brother. He glanced away.

  Kaye retrieved the cake and plates and quickly sliced pieces for everyone.

  “Okay, tell me why you are doing this rodeo,” Charlie began, “and how I can help.”

  Joel nodded toward Kaye. “Sis is running the show. What do you need?”

  She explained about buying seed grain for the ranchers. “If you could get the word out about the rodeo to all your contacts, I�
�d appreciate it. Hopefully, we have people attending and ticket sales will help with expenses. And any cowboys who want to compete are welcome. If you’d like to come back and do the Sunday-morning service, that would be great. I think several of the local pastors might want to join in with you.”

  “I like that idea. I’d love to team up with the other local pastors and minister to the people here.”

  Things were coming together. “Thanks.”

  Charlie looked at his watch. “I need to go back into Fort Worth. I may be a preacher, but I take my horse with me. I have to get him.”

  They rose and gathered the dishes, carrying them into the kitchen. The men also moved the furniture back inside. Kaye listened to the men talk while Joel helped her load the dishwasher.

  “Caleb,” Charlie said in a quiet voice. “I want you to know Tag Johnson is doing fine. He’s going to be released from the hospital next week.”

  Kaye strained to hear Caleb’s response. Caleb said something, but she couldn’t understand his words. She glanced over her shoulder. Caleb stood next to Charlie, their faces close together. Caleb’s grim expression cut across her heart. The man hurt.

  Joel touched her hand. “Sis.”

  She jerked around to face her brother. “What?”

  He looked at the plate she held under the running water.

  “Here.” She handed him the plate.

  “You shouldn’t be snooping.”

  Kaye rinsed another dish. “I wasn’t.”

  “For shame, fibbing while Charlie is right here in the kitchen.”

  “Has Caleb talked to you about what happened?”

  “No, and I didn’t ask.”

  Kaye understood the male culture of never talking about feelings. But she’d also known fellow soldiers and officers who suffered when they kept it inside. Wasn’t that why she was going into counseling? “It doesn’t go away,” she whispered.

  Joel looked down at her. “I know, Sis.”

  His words were colored with pain, and she couldn’t figure out if it was his pain or if he was talking about hers.

  Charlie walked to the sink. “I want to thank y’all for lunch. I’m going to do all I can to help. What are the dates?”