by Ann Major
She stared at Cole, too stunned to move.
“I—I don’t feel too well. I’m very tired, Sam. Just call the sheriff. And an ambulance. And the firemen. Then we’ve got to get Vanilla and make sure she’s all right.”
When Sam went out to make the calls, Cole’s dark head stirred. His hands smeared blood across the threshold as he fought to lift himself.
“Don’t move,” she whispered. “Or…or I’ll…”
He was so weak he couldn’t lift his head and it was agony to watch him struggle. Their eyes met, and she began to tremble all over when she saw his concern and fear—for her. He was bleeding. She had to stop the blood, she thought. She had to save him.
“Run,” he managed in a thready whisper. “S-Sam… Run!” He closed his eyes.
“Sam?”
A second or two of beating silence passed before he managed in hoarse voice. “Not me. Not me—Sam.”
And then she knew.
“Let him go. Put the gun down.” Sam’s disembodied voice came out of the darkness before she saw him. “Don’t forget I’ve got Vanilla. She’s safe and sound for the moment, but not for long. She’ll die if you don’t do exactly what I say.” Sam stepped over the threshold into the lit room.
Feeling desperate, she stared helplessly at Cole’s black head. “But he’ll bleed…”
“So?” Sam laughed.
“Why, Sam?”
“Why? Why the hell couldn’t Caesar have flown with
Cole that day instead of Mia? If they’d gone down together, the board would have chosen me for sure.”
“You don’t know that.”
“If you’d only resigned… You had no business…” His voice changed. “Just put the gun down.”
The hand that held the revolver hung limply against her side. Slowly she knelt, intending to do exactly what he said.
It was over. She was no kick-ass heroine after all. No brave audacious cowgirl like Mia. No daughter Caesar could be proud of, either. She was a joke. Cole would die because of her. She’d even suspected Aunt Mona—for buying bullets. All hunters bought bullets. She’d shot the good guy, who also happened to be the man she loved.
Her face crumpled. Just as she felt herself surrendering to total despair and her fingers relaxing on the gun, she glanced up desperately, straight into the painted eyes of her father’s portrait. Someone had replaced the immense painting above the fireplace, so that he could stare coldly down at her in this moment of supreme stupidity. He looked as arrogant and superior as he had in real life—and as demanding.
“I’m sorry, Daddy,” she murmured. “I wanted you to be proud of me.” She turned to Sam. “You killed all of those people.”
“I did it for the ranch,” Sam said. “I want to run the ranch. I don’t want to answer to anybody other than the board. I did it for the same reasons your father killed his brother. Down here whoever runs the Golden Spurs is like a king. I tried so hard to make Caesar proud of me. Just like you did. But I was only his nephew, and he wanted one of his children to be his heir. I tried so hard to show him…. Then Cole married Mia, and started to outshine me.”
“Daddy didn’t murder anybody. He loved Uncle Jack. He’s not sneaky like you. He was brave and bold. You’re a coward. A real coward. Maybe he saw through you, Sam!”
“Lizzy, put the gun down or I’ll blow your brains out.”
She stared at Cole again, who lay sprawled before her. Slowly she lifted her gaze to her father’s portrait again. For the first time in her life she felt his profound belief in her. It was almost as if he were here with her.
“It’s up to you,” Caesar seemed to say. “Everybody’s depending on you. You can do it, Lizzy.”
She thought of her mother.
And then it happened.
One minute she was weak and scared and utterly lacking in self-confidence. Her shoulders were sagging, and she was lowering the gun to the floor about to do as Sam said.
And then the wind gusted, the door banged and her father seemed to speak to her again, “Give it all you’ve got, girl! He’s gonna kill you sure as shootin’. Cole will die sure enough. You have nothing to lose, girl!”
Her grip tightened on the loathsome gun. Without thinking she whirled, thrust it upward and fired twice.
Boom! Boom! The gunshots sounded like explosions.
Sam staggered backward, clutching the bullet wound in his chest. “I didn’t think you had it in you.”
“I didn’t.” It was as if someone else had done it. As if Daddy’s spirit had leapt out of that canvas and taken charge of her and pulled the trigger for her.
Lizzy fell to her knees. Dropping the gun, almost shoving it away, she gently touched Cole’s face. His brow felt cold. So cold. Like ice. Maybe he was already dead.
She’d shot him. She’d killed him. She would never touch another gun as long as she lived. Never!
“No! Don’t die!” she screamed. “I’ll marry you! I love you! Just don’t die!”
Grabbing her cell phone, she dialed 9-1-1. Then she rushed to the bedroom and found blankets to cover both men with. She had to find a way to stop the bleeding.
If Cole lived, would he ever forgive her for believing him capable of murder?
And where was Vanilla?
Lizzy pressed against his wounds with the blanket and held him while she waited.
“Duck! Puppy!” Vanilla made monkey sounds along with real words. Joanne bounced her and pointed at the television set in the ICU waiting room in an effort to amuse her.
Lizzy glanced at her watch. “You two can go. I don’t need a baby-sitter.”
“Not until it’s time for you to go in to see him,” Joanne said. “He’s going to be fine, you know.”
Lizzy was so frantic and guilt-stricken over Cole that she hadn’t left the hospital other than to shower and change for the five days he’d been here. Friends and family came to stay with her and to tell her to take care of herself, that she had to keep herself going for Cole.
She barely noticed them coming and going. The few moments when she was allowed inside the ICU to speak with Cole, he lay as still as her father had, except Cole’s eyes were closed. He didn’t react, not even when she said his name and told him who she was. He simply lay there, the only sounds in his room were those of his machines.
According to his doctors, who constantly reassured her, Cole was in a light coma. Even though his doctors were very optimistic, Lizzy was still terrified that he was going to die. Or if he didn’t die, she was terrified he’d never forgive her. When she was with him, she stroked him, talked to him, held his hand, prayed for his love and forgiveness and begged him to stay in this world because she loved him so much.
Joanne only came during the mornings because that was Vanilla’s best time. In an effort to cheer and distract her, Joanne always brought the baby. Thus, the three of them were sitting together on the edges of their chairs in the little waiting room this morning.
Never one to be confined, Vanilla was squirming in her grandmother’s lap and pointing excitedly at the cartoons on the television. Joanne constantly stroked the wriggling baby’s curls as if to reassure herself the baby was all right.
“You saved her,” she said simply.
I shot Cole, she thought. “Not really. Vanilla was asleep in Sam’s truck the whole time. I don’t think he could’ve hurt her. She was strapped into her car seat. He took her to scare me.”
“Thank heavens she was okay.”
“It’s nearly noon,” Lizzy said. “Vanilla’s restless. You might as well go. They’ll let me into see Cole again in a few minutes.” She hesitated. “Did I tell you the doctors say he’s getting better? That maybe today, maybe he’ll wake up.”
“Five times this morning.”
“Did you know Sam’s doing so well, they’re moving him to the county jail today. I’ll be glad when he’s in jail, locked up I mean. I keep having dreams about him escaping and coming after me.”
“I can’t believ
e that Sam did all those horrible things,” Joanne said. “He flew to Nicaragua pretending to be Cole. He changed license plates with Cole… Aunt Nanette has taken to her bed. It would be a hard thing for a mother to take. Even her. She ignored him as a child. She paid more attention to her lovers. That’s why we took Sam. Poor Bobby Joe still doesn’t know what to do with himself. Well…at least it’s over.”
“It won’t be over until Cole pulls through,” Lizzy said. “And…and forgives me. If he does.”
“You were so brave and wonderful,” Joanne said. “You saved Vanilla. Of course, he’ll forgive you.”
“But I shot him.”
“That part was an accident. Cole is going to pull through. He of all people will understand. Remember Mia…and his awful guilt? Sweetheart, your father would be so proud of you.”
“Who would have thought that Sam… He killed Mia, you know. Not Cole.”
“And your father and that woman and two of my darling little birds, as well. I found their little corpses in what was left of the aviary. Vanilla and I buried them in the garden under the roses. All the rest of my little darlings are roosting in the Spur Tree until Eli can build them proper quarters.”
“Sam wanted everything that was Caesar’s,” Lizzy said. “He told Phillips he had always been jealous of me because Caesar favored me over everybody.”
“He was even blackmailing me. Although I didn’t know it was him at the time.”
“Why?”
“He sent me a copy of Electra’s journal while I was in Houston. I brought it to the ranch to read, but he stole it out of my room before I got a chance. After the shootings, when I went to get Vanilla out of Cole’s truck where he’d hidden her, I found the original on the seat beside Vanilla, and I took it.”
“But it’s evidence.”
“It’s private family history. They have enough evidence to put Sam where he belongs for a long long time. The journal is your birthright. You deserve to know about your mother. She was my best friend in school. She came here to help me with my wedding. Your father fell madly in love with her. Only she couldn’t settle down. I don’t think I ever quit loving Jack. Now I know Caesar never quit loving Electra.”
“Tell me about Mia…and me.”
“She and I both got pregnant at the same time. Then Jack died, and Electra refused to marry your father. So your father and I eventually married, but our life together was more complicated than either of us ever imagined. We didn’t love each other, and we couldn’t let go of the past. I think we began blaming each other instead of supporting one another. Sometimes we blamed you and Mia, too. Sometimes we competed through you and Mia. Once when Electra got in trouble, he flew to South America and saved her life. He stayed with her two weeks and got her pregnant again.”
“What?” Lizzy felt the room spin.
“Lizzy, it’s all in her journal. She wrote that you have twin sisters. The blackmailer or rather Sam said Electra was going to publish it, but I think she kept the journal so that if anything happened to her, you would find out. Only Sam found the journal instead and used it for his own purposes. To stir us all up.”
“Sisters? I have sisters? Where are they?”
“I don’t know, but there was a photograph of them. They’re blonde and look a lot like you. I was too upset to read the journal all that thoroughly, and now the picture’s gone. But I have the original journal at home under lock and key. The important thing is that you have twin sisters.”
“And I’ll find them. When Cole is better, if it’s the last thing I do, I’ll find them.”
“And you and I?” Joanne began before her voice broke. “What about us?”
Lizzy saw a gentle maternal wisdom and an acceptance shining in Joanne’s eyes that she’d never seen before.
“Us?”
“Do you think we could start over? And at least try to be friends?” Joanne asked. “A long time ago I made a promise to your father to be a good mother to you.” Vanilla looked up at both of them, and Joanne smiled. “This time I’ll try really hard.”
“And so will I. At least now I understand what you were going through.”
Vanilla, who was beaming brightly at them both, began to clap softly.
“You little rascal.” Lizzy took her hands and kissed them. “You want us to pay attention to you, don’t you?”
Joanne opened her arms, and Lizzy and Vanilla, who cooed and wriggled, came into them.
* * *
Cole heard a woman say his name very softly. He opened his eyes and groggily fought to focus on the woman beside him.
Terrible antiseptic hospital smells made him wrinkle his nose. He made out hazy green walls. South Texas sunlight streamed through a window and lit up a woman’s hair so that it shone like spun silver. She was sitting to his right, and since the light came from behind her, he couldn’t see her face.
Was he dead? Was she an angel?
Trying to see her better, he moved. Pain knifed through his shoulder in a savage burning thrust.
“Damn!” He hurt too much to be dead.
“Cole?”
“Who the hell are you?” he grumbled, blaming her.
“Lizzy.”
Lizzy. She spoke. Then he was alive.
“Will you ever forgive me for shooting you?” she said, touching his hair.
“Shooting me?” He remembered her in the door holding a gun in a wobbling hand. She’d looked scared to death. “Now that’s a hard one,” he muttered, but he tried to manage a lopsided grin. “The last time I felt like this a foul-breathed shrimper was giving me mouth-to-mouth….”
“I’m serious, Cole.”
“Kiss me, so I’ll know you’re real and I’m real. Then I’ll think about it. You shot me, huh?”
She leaned over and cradled his face in her hands. “I’ve been waiting for you to wake up for days. The doctors kept saying you would. But I was scared.”
Me, too.
“I prayed. I prayed so hard. Most of all I prayed you’d forgive me.”
Love for her flowed through him, frightening him with its intensity. “Just kiss me darlin’. Make the hurt go away.”
She made a choking sound. Slowly their mouths met. His lips were dry and chapped, but hers felt soft and dewy sweet. The kiss didn’t last long before his head fell back to the pillow, but it was enough for now.
“You gonna marry me or not?” he whispered.
“Yes. Yes.”
“Still think all I want is the ranch, darlin’?”
“I don’t care. All I know is that I love you and that I can’t live without you.”
“I feel the same way,” he said as he felt his eyes growing heavy and the darkness closed in on him.
“You didn’t say whether you’ll forgive me for shooting you.”
“I think I’ll let you suffer a spell.” He closed his eyes.
“Cole!”
When he woke again, he felt stronger. It was dark, but she sat in the same chair beside him, looking desperate and uncertain. He asked her about Sam, and she told him everything.
“He’s in jail. Apparently he thought Daddy killed Uncle Jack to get control of the ranch, so he thought the same path to power would work for him, too. Only Daddy didn’t kill Jack. I know he didn’t.”
“So, you turned out to be a kick-ass heroine after all. Shot me. Shot Sam. You’re a real cowgirl. Your daddy would be proud. Hell, I’m proud.”
“I’m sorry I…I suspected you of murder. If it helps, I suspected Aunt Mona and Uncle B.B., too.”
He didn’t speak for a long while. “Hell, I suspected me.”
“I’ll never touch another gun. I swear!”
“Lizzy, I understand why you shot me. You thought whoever was out there had Vanilla and that he’d kill you and then kill her.”
“I made a terrible mistake. I should have thrown the gun down. I should’ve—”
“I’ve made a few mistakes of my own.”
“I—I just want to be myself now
. Whatever that is. Life is an ongoing challenge and process.”
“Tell me about it. Before the accident I was one person. Then I became another. I’m the same person, and yet I’m different in ways I may never be able to understand.”
“I don’t care. Either way I love you,” she said, touching his cheek with a trembling hand. “I love you so much.”
“I have all these images of you in my mind. I’ve forgotten a lot. But I always remembered you. And you’re always so beautiful. I still don’t know why I married Mia.”
She went very still. “And I don’t care anymore.”
“Maybe I’ll never remember. All I know is that I love you and I always will. And that I never slept with Mia.”
“I love you.”
He took her hand in his and pulled her closer to the bed, and he saw the depth of her love for him in her shining eyes.
“Lizzy, oh, Lizzy.”
Their lips met. A long time later he released her mouth with a sigh. Then he rested his cheek against the base of her neck and continued to hold her.
“I don’t ever want to let you go,” he said.
“You don’t have to.”
EPILOGUE
Smart Cowboy Saying:
The easiest way to eat crow is while it’s still warm. The colder it gets the harder it is to swaller.
—Anonymous
Epilogue
The wedding march was playing, and the music seemed to soar high above Lizzy as the doors of the ranch chapel opened. Everybody turned. For an instant she thought of her father and those who weren’t there—her mother, Mia, Shanghai, her missing sisters. Then she took a deep breath at her end of the red plush carpet and waited for the perfect moment to make her entrance.
Vanilla, who stood at the other end of the little church beside Cole and Mandy and all the other bridesmaids and groomsmen, began to clap and dance when she saw Lizzy in her bridal gown and veil.
You little minx, you’re stealing my show. Not that Lizzy minded.