How to Train Your Dragon: How to Cheat a Dragon's Curse

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How to Train Your Dragon: How to Cheat a Dragon's Curse Page 1

by Cressida Cowell




  You don’t have to read the Hiccup books in order.

  But if you want to, this is the right order:

  ABOUT HICCUP

  Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third was

  an awesome swordfighter, a dragon-whisperer,

  and the greatest Viking Hero that ever lived.

  But Hiccup’s memoirs look back to when

  he was a very ordinary boy, and finding

  it hard to be a Hero.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the

  author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons,

  living or dead, is coincidental.

  Text and illustrations copyright © 2006 by Cressida Cowell

  Cover design by Kristina Iulo

  Cover © 2010 Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading,

  and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher is unlawful

  piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the

  book (other than for review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the

  publisher at [email protected]. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.

  Little, Brown and Company

  Hachette Book Group

  237 Park Avenue, New York, NY 10017

  lb-kids.com

  Little, Brown and Company is a division of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  The Little, Brown name and logo are trademarks of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content) that are not owned by the publisher.

  First ebook edition: June 2014

  ISBN 978-0-316-33567-6

  E3

  ~ CONTENTS ~

  1. The Hunting-with-Bows-and-Arrows-on-Skis

  Expedition ........................................................15

  2. Sabre-Tooth Driver Dragons...............................29

  3. The Hunters Become the Hunted........................48

  4. Is There Something Wrong with Fishlegs?...........67

  5. Smashsticks-on-Ice............................................79

  6. What Old Wrinkly Said.......................................89

  7. The Quest for the Frozen Potato........................100

  8. The Wrath of Thor..............................................110

  9. Back on Berk.....................................................118

  10. Freya’sday Eve on Hysteria.............................120

  11. In the Soup......................................................131

  12. Will Toothless Save the Day? ..........................151

  13. The Great Potato Burglary...............................158

  14. The Potato-Burglars’ Run.................................176

  15. They Might Just Make it, Now..........................182

  16. The Doomfang..................................................186

  17. The Quest is Over.............................................196

  18. Fishlegs...........................................................207

  19. The Final Chapter.............................................214

  Epilogue.................................................................233

  1. THE HUNTING-WITH-

  BOWS-AND-ARROWS-ON-SKIS

  EXPEDITION

  Winters were always cold in the Viking Lands.

  But this winter was the coldest in a hundred

  years. It was so cold that the Sullen Sea had frozen over,

  and all the islands in the Inner Isles were now joined

  together by a great flat desert of solid ice, two

  metres thick in places.

  On this particularly cold

  morning several hours before

  breakfast, it was as if the whole

  15

  world was holding its breath, frozen in time. The air was

  as sharp as broken glass, no sound disturbed the pure

  snowy silence.

  No sound, that is, apart from an appalling, mad

  screaming coming from somewhere out in the middle

  of the ice.

  For a small party of young boys and their

  teacher from the Hooligan Tribe had set out from

  the little Isle of Berk where they lived to the Island of

  Villainy to the south.

  Not in a boat, of course, for you cannot sail

  across a frozen sea.

  16

  They were speeding far too fast across the ice

  in an enormous wooden Viking SLEIGH, pulled by six

  pure white Sabre-Tooth Driver Dragons larger than lions

  and faster than cheetahs.

  The dreadful mad yelling was coming from the

  man driving the sleigh, Gobber the Belch. Gobber was

  the teacher in charge of the Pirate Training Programme

  on Berk, and he was an enormous monster of a man

  wrapped up in furs who could easily have been

  mistaken for a grizzly bear with a dirty red beard and

  an attitude problem.

  ‘GEDDONWITHIT YOU MISERABLE

  WHITE WORMS!’ roared Gobber at the Sabre-Tooth

  Dragons, cracking his whip above their heads. ‘I’VE

  HAD SNAILS THAT HAVE MOVED QUICKER

  THAN YOU LOT! MY GRANNY COULD SKIP

  FASTER THAN THIS AND SHE’S A HUNDRED

  AND FOUR! YEEEEEEHAAH!!’

  One gigantic furry arm lashed out with a whip

  that curled through the air like a great black serpent,

  the other shook the reins in a lunatic frenzy that sent

  the Driver Dragons bounding forwards in terrible

  uncontrolled leaps.

  Behind Gobber on the sleigh sat twelve of

  his pupils.

  17

  Ten of these boys were ugly young thugs yelling

  as loudly in crazy excitement as their teacher.

  ‘YEEEEEEEHAAAAH!’ they whooped, as the

  sleigh hit a snowbank and sailed ten metres through

  the air and then slammed back down on the ice with

  stomach-churning violence.

  ‘YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAH!!’

  The last two boys were smaller than the rest and

  a lot less excited.

  ‘I’m glad,’ gasped Hiccup Horrendous Haddock

  the Third, as the sleigh tipped over wildly on one

  runner with an awful screech and spray of ice, ‘I’m glad

  I didn’t have breakfast because I think it would have

  come up again…’

  Hiccup is, in fact, the Hero of this story, although

  you would never have guessed it to look at him. He

  was small, and red-haired, and very, very ordinary.

  Hiccup’s best friend Fishlegs, a skinny runner-

  bean of a boy with asthma and a squint, wasn’t

  really listening. He was praying to Thor with his eyes

  squeezed tight shut.

  ‘Please, Thor,’ begged Fishlegs, ‘please make it

  stop…’

  Fishlegs’s prayer was about to be answered.

  The sleigh was approaching the great black cliffs

  18

  of the Visithugs Territo
ries far too impossibly fast for it

  to stop in time…

  ‘Don’t open your eyes, Fishlegs,’ advised Hiccup.

  Gobber the Belch reared up and with a mighty

  roar of ‘WOOOOOOAH!!!’ leant back so far pulling

  on the reins that he was nearly horizontal. The Sabre-

  Tooths came to a plunging halt so sharply that the

  sleigh wheeled round in a mad arc… they were going

  to slam into that cliff at such a speed they would all be

  smashed to splinters…

  ‘AAAAARGH!’ yelled Hiccup, shutting his

  eyes too.

  The sleigh screeched to a quivering halt. Hiccup

  opened his eyes again. Astonishingly, they were still

  alive. But the smooth black wall of the cliff was only

  centimetres away from Hiccup’s cheek. Hiccup held on

  to the rock for a second to help himself stop shaking.

  ‘RIGHT!’ bellowed Gobber, clambering out of

  the sleigh entirely unconcerned. ‘WHAT ARE YOU

  ALL DOING SKULKING IN THERE? GET OUT

  AND STAND TO ATTENTION YOU PATHETIC

  DRIBBLES OF EARWIG DROPPINGS!’

  Yawning and chattering, all twelve boys

  unpacked skis from the back of the sleigh, and

  attached them to the bottom of their furry boots.

  For six months of the year the Vikings lived

  under SNOW… so a Viking Warrior had to be just as

  good at SKIING as he was at SAILING.

  This was a Hunting-with-Bows-and-Arrows-

  on-Skis Expedition. The boys had to ski down Mount

  Villainy, the largest mountain in the Inner Isles,

  shooting with their arrows as many Semi-Spotted

  Snowpeckers as they could.

  ‘I’m going to get at least FIFTY,’ boasted

  Snotface Snotlout, a tall thug of a boy with huge

  nostrils and a moustache like a little furry caterpillar

  squirming on his upper lip.

  20

  ‘SILENCE!’ screamed Gobber, cracking his

  whip.

  There was absolute silence immediately. It’s

  a curious fact, but a heavily armed, mad, six-and-a-

  half-foot teacher holding a whip tends to get his class’s

  attention.

  ‘I will be staying here to guard the sleigh,’ yelled

  Gobber. ‘Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third will

  be in charge of the Hunting Party when you get to the

  mountain.’

  Ten of the boys groaned and turned round to

  look furiously at Hiccup.

  ALL of them reckoned they would make better

  leaders than Hiccup.

  Snotlout had won the Senseless Violence Cup

  three years in a row. Wartihog could smash chairs to

  pieces with his bare fists. Dogsbreath the Duhbrain

  burped so loud he shattered glass.

  Small, skinny and unimportant, only Hiccup

  looked like he had no leadership skills whatsoever. He

  stood on one leg apologetically and this made his skis

  cross and he fell over.

  ‘Why does HICCUP get to be in charge

  AGAIN?’ demanded Snotface Snotlout through

  gritted teeth.

  22

  ‘Because Hiccup is the son of the CHIEF and

  one day he will be in charge PERMANENTLY, Thor

  help us all…’ explained Gobber, helping Hiccup to his

  feet and dusting the snow off him with one hairy hand.

  ‘Any questions?’ boomed Gobber.

  Fishlegs put up his hand. ‘Just a small point, sir,’

  he said. ‘How are we going to climb up the mountain in

  the first place?’

  ‘The Sabre-Tooth Dragons will DRAG you to

  the top ON your skis,’ replied Gobber. ‘It shouldn’t take

  more than half an hour.’

  Fishlegs and Hiccup looked dubiously at the

  great white creatures crouching dangerously on the

  ice, tongues spilling out over teeth as sharp as swords,

  cat-like eyes gazing at their small human Masters with

  the purest hatred.

  23

  ‘So that’s that, then,’ said Gobber. ‘I shall wait

  for you here and see you all in three hours’ time… I

  really need a NAP… way too early for me…’

  Gobber settled himself on the furs of the sleigh

  and gave an enormous yawn. ‘Oh, and one more thing…

  as you know, nobody lives on the island of Villainy, but

  the island of Hysteria is just next door and I should

  warn you that at this time of year there may be Hysterics

  about…’

  24

  ‘HYSTERICS???’ squeaked Fishlegs, somewhat,

  well, hysterically. ‘But the Hysterics are trapped safely in

  Hysteria, aren’t they?’

  HYSTERICS, I should explain, were a

  particularly bloodthirsty and lunatic Tribe of Vikings.

  Even tough Tribes like the Visithugs were scared of the

  Hysterics. Hiccup had never actually met a Hysteric, but

  he knew they were renowned for killing you first, and

  asking questions later.

  Normally they didn’t trouble the other Tribes,

  however, because three-quarters of the island ended in

  dizzyingly high cliffs plunging straight into deep seas,

  and on the north coast was the Wrath of Thor, where

  an impossibly huge and monstrous Sea Dragon called

  the DOOMFANG lived.

  The good news about this was that nobody

  could get into Hysteria, and even more importantly, the

  Hysterics could not get out.

  Except at this time of year…

  ‘Because at this time of year,’ boomed Gobber

  happily, ‘the Wrath of Thor is all frozen over, and the

  Doomfang is trapped under two metres solid of ice. So

  if you do happen to come across a Hysteric – and I’m

  SURE you won’t, it’s far too early in the morning – I

  suggest you ski like fury in the opposite direction.’

  And just like that, Gobber fell asleep.

  26

  Sabre-Tooth Driver Dragons

  Sabre-Tooths are enormous lion-like dragons that

  do not hibernate, and are therefore very useful

  to the Vikings for pulling their sleighs, and

  dragging them up mountains during the winter.

  They have been known to eat their owners.

  ~STATISTICS~

  COLOURS: Always white

  ARMED WITH: Sabre-Teeth and spikes on head.

  FEAR FACTOR:.................6

  ATTACK:...........................7

  SPEED:.............................7

  SIZE:................................7

  DISOBEDIENCE................6

  2. SABRE-TOOTH DRIVER

  DRAGONS

  Gobber’s enormous snores rang out like a walrus calling

  out to another walrus some fifty icebergs away.

  As if they were all a part of the same creature, the

  pack of Sabre-Tooth Driver Dragons settled themselves

  down on the ice and refused to move. By Woden’s Armpit,

  but those Drivers were BIG.

  The boys looked at them.

  ‘Well come on, then, Hiccup,’ grunted Wartihog

  impatiently. ‘Take charge!’

  Hiccup cleared his throat and used his most

  reasonable voice. ‘OK, guys,’ he said in Dragonese.* ‘I

  don’t want any trouble…’

  ‘Oh look, it talkssss…’ hissed a particularly large
/>
  and savage-looking Sabre-Tooth. He was missing an eye,

  and from the specially royal way he held himself, seemed

  to be the Leader of the Pack. ‘The little Human

  Tadpole is speaking the noble Dragon tongue…’

  The other Drivers laughed jeeringly.

  ‘We all know what we’re supposed to be doing

  here...’ Hiccup continued.

  30

  ‘We know what WE’RE going to be doing,’

  sneered the Driver, closing his one eye and settling

  himself comfortably. ‘WE’RE going to have a nice

  long sleep right here while you sweat it up the

  largest mountain in the Inner Isles…’

  ‘Oh for Thor’s sake!’ exploded Snotface Snotlout.

  ‘That girly “speaking Dragonese” stuff isn’t going to

  work with these brutes!’

  Snotlout grabbed the black whip from Gobber’s

  relaxed hand, and cracked it.

  Snnnnnnaaaap!

  The Driver Dragons blinked open their eyes.

  Snotlout cracked the whip again, this time

  letting the end of it lash the face of the Sabre-Tooth

  with the one eye. The Driver sprang to his feet with

  a yowl of pain and the rest of the pack followed him,

  furious but respectful. The boys cheered.

  ‘That’s the way to do it!’ grinned Snotlout,

  whipping another of the dragons for the pure pleasure

  of it. The animal howled and Snotlout laughed. ‘Disobey

  ME, would you, you SNIVELLING CRAWLING

  PIECES OF FORKED-TONGUE RUBBISH! This’ll

  learn you!’

  ‘Don’t do that, Snotlout,’ said Hiccup quietly.

  Hiccup didn’t normally stand up to Snotlout, but he

  31

  couldn’t bear to see an animal as proud and dignified

  as a Sabre-Tooth Driver made to dance about like a

  monkey.

  Snotlout stopped what he was doing to turn on

  Hiccup.

  ‘What’s this?’ sneered Snotlout. ‘Is Hiccup the

  Useless trying to tell Snotlout the HERO what to do?

  Face it, Hiccup, the snow will turn as blue as Gobber

 

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