by Jordan Ford
It makes me want to kiss Layla, so I start edging through the crowd. Conversations are flying all around me: speculation, exaggerated stories about how Layla and I were jumped by a bunch of angry Brownridge Bears. I listen for mention of the photos, but nothing really pops and all I can hope is that they’ll never surface. It’s probably a pipe dream, but I try not to dwell on that thought as I close the space between me and Layla.
“I can’t believe it,” Roxy is saying. She’s wincing at Layla’s face, gently gliding her finger over the nasty bruise below her left eye. “What an asshole.” Her voice shakes, and the venomous look in her blue eyes is vibrant and a little scary.
“I got him back, Rox. Don’t worry.” The side of Layla’s mouth tips up in a grin.
“What’d you do?” Michelle’s eyes round.
“I sunk my teeth through his bottom lip.” Layla makes a face, her nose scrunching as she sticks her tongue out like she’s about to gag.
“Wow!” Michelle’s eyebrows rise. “So, don’t mess with you then.”
Layla giggles while Roxy tips her head back with a laugh. “Who knew you had it in you, you feisty little bitch. We’re going to have to start calling you Vampire Girl or something.”
“Please don’t.” Layla’s expression crinkles.
Michelle giggles, wrapping her arm around her friend. I stand back and let them have their moment, but I don’t miss the way Roxy’s lips dip as she pulls back. Her blue eyes narrow on something behind us and I look over my shoulder in time to see Derek being escorted out of the room. There’s a policeman on either side of him, no doubt for his own protection. Jeers and catcalls thunder around the room as the Raiders spot the guy. His dad shuffles behind them, looking red-faced with shame. He keeps his eyes down and doesn’t even look at Layla when they pass.
Roxy glares at Derek as he walks to the exit. He looks up once when he reaches the door and I swear, if looks could kill, Derek would be flat on his ass. His eyes narrow and he licks the corner of his lips. Roxy shakes her head and turns away, her cheeks spiking with color. She is seriously pissed. It’s a good thing she and Derek don’t really know each other, because anyone in their right mind knows that you don’t piss off Roxanne Carmichael. I actually find the steam coming out of Roxy’s ears comforting. I always picked her for a self-absorbed princess, but she obviously cares about Layla more than I thought. The fact that she’s so pissed about her friend getting hurt is a credit to her.
Maybe these girls aren’t as shallow as I once thought. If Layla’s anything to go by, these cheerleaders are all hiding behind thick layers of cool. I sure hope they can learn to shed ‘em, because having spent time with girls like Tori and the real Layla Mahoney, the world’s far better-looking when they show their true selves.
#37:
Family
Layla
It takes a while for the crowd to disperse. By the time I detangle myself from Roxy and Michelle and make it to Mom’s car, I’m completely exhausted. Mack follows us home, and because half the team lives on our side of town, we end up looking like a funeral procession as everyone makes their way home past our house. It’s like Mack’s friends are under instructions to make sure I get through my front door unscathed. Mack pulls up behind Mom’s car and I step out in time to see the trail of vehicles disappear down the end of our street. I look out for Mr. Jones’s truck, but my boyfriend is probably already home and being fussed over by his mama.
I can’t help a small grin. He’ll probably find it painful, but he has no idea how lucky he is.
Mack steps up behind me, gently laying his hand on my lower back as we walk toward the front door. I glance up and give him a closed-mouth grin, which he mirrors. I guess we still have some more talking to do, but I’m too drained and tired.
Mom’s skin is still that pale creamy color, her eyes out of focus and glassy. She didn’t talk at all as we drove home, too busy sniffing and biting her lips together. She’s probably thinking about Martin. Her husband didn’t even look at her as he followed Derek and the police out of the hospital. I shiver, glad I kept my eyes closed when the guy walked past me. The insults flung at him by Mack’s friends made it feel like a convicted criminal was being walked to his jail cell in handcuffs.
Derek’s eighteen now and won’t be considered a minor if he gets charged with assault and battery. But he’s Martin’s kid, and although he’s a complete asshole and psycho freak, I don’t know if I have it in me to actually press charges. I just want this to be over. I want to forget it all happened and just get on with my life. Finn may feel differently. I guess that’s something we’ll have to face together.
I step into the house, exhaustion tugging at me. I can’t believe it’s not even six o’clock yet. I feel like I haven’t slept in a week. Wrapping my arms around my waist, I resist the urge to shudder then head for the stairs. All I want to do is lie down. I wish Finn were here. We could lie on the bed together. I could rest my head on his shoulder. His arm around my back would keep me safe and help me sleep.
“Layla.” Mom stops me with a whisper.
I rest my hand on the bannister and look over my shoulder. Her pale face is blotchy from crying, her eyes red-rimmed and puffy. As she steps towards me, her lips form a wonky line. She’s fighting a fresh wave of tears. Placing her hands on my shoulders, she slowly spins me around to face her.
I don’t know what to say as she skims her finger over my bruised cheek.
“My baby girl,” she murmurs. “I’m sorry you felt invisible. I’m here now, okay? And I’m seeing you.” Leaning back, she bends a little to look me in the eye. “I’m hearing you, and I’ll believe anything you tell me, alright?”
My chest constricts, making the air in my lungs seem thin and unbreathable. My heart starts pounding so hard I can feel my pulse throbbing through my veins.
Finally, I offer a slow nod and mouth, “Okay.”
“I love you.” Mom pulls me into a hug, pressing her cheek against mine and holding me like I’ve just come home from a war. It takes me a second to move, but slowly my arms wrap around her, allowing a fresh wave of tears to flood my eyes.
Mack’s Vans squeak on the floor as he walks over to us, and soon his solid arms encase us both. I close my eyes and remember Dad. He used to insist on family hugs before bed. He’d wrap his arms around us all, making Mom laugh and Mack and I writhe and squeal. How could I have ever complained? Mack rests his cheek on the top of my head. He has no intention of stepping out of this any time soon, and I really don’t mind. Mom and I take turns sniffing and letting out blubbering little whimpers.
I have no idea how much time passes but we eventually pull apart, gaze between one another, and give looks that offer a range of emotions which can’t be verbalized. There are resounding ‘I love you’s’ and ‘I’m sorry’s.’ It’s enough.
I swipe the tears off my face and look between Mack and Mom. “So, what happens now?”
Mom purses her lips, her forehead wrinkling. With a heavy sigh, she rubs my arm and says, “Well, I’ve told Martin that Derek can’t be around you. He can visit him in Brownridge…if he chooses to stay with me.” Her voice quakes, her face bunching in agony. “It’s quite awkward, you know? It feels like I’m asking him to choose between me and his son. But…you kids came first in my life, and um, I think I forgot that for a while.”
A smile stretches across my lips, so unexpected it surprises us all. “Mom…” I tip my head. “You’re in love. It’s kind of all-consuming. I get that now. You just so desperately wanted this blended family thing to work…and I didn’t exactly make it easy on you. I was just missing Dad.”
“I miss him too,” she whispers. “Just because I love Martin doesn’t mean I’ve stopped loving your father. He’ll always be a part of me. And no matter where you kids end up, you’ll always be a part of me too.”
She takes our hands and we stand in a connected circle. Looking up at Mack, she gives him a tender, accepting smile. I can’t believe I’m going to ha
ve to say goodbye to him in a few short months. I squeeze his hand and he squeezes right back.
“We’re family, no matter what.” His voice is thick and husky.
“Always.” Mom’s smile falters for a moment, her expression wavering as fresh tears build in her eyes. She’s probably thinking about Mack leaving and then lamenting the fact that only one year later I’ll be gone too. If she and Martin don’t survive this, she’ll be all alone.
The thought is heartbreaking and I lurch back into her arms, squeezing tight as she cries against my shoulder.
It takes a while for us to pull out of that one. We’ve kind of got some catching up to do, I guess. But we eventually separate and I hobble up to my room to lie down. Mom’s insisting I have an early night. She’s right, but I can’t get comfortable. After half an hour of restless twitching, I reach for my phone to text Finn. But the sound of the front door opening stops me.
Sitting up, I gaze at my bedroom door, air puffing out of my chest.
“Celia?” Martin calls, his voice low and broken.
I gasp and hustle off my bed, creeping out my door and finding a perch on the top step. I can see down to the front entrance where Martin is standing with his hands in his pockets. His face is kind of pasty, his wide lips dipping into a miserable frown. Running a hand through his tousled hair, he lets out a sigh. That’s when I notice Mom hovering in the archway that leads to the kitchen. Her fingers grip the frame like she’s using the wood to keep herself upright.
They’re just standing there, staring at each other as if this is their first date and they’re not sure what to say.
“Hi,” Mom eventually squeaks.
The edge of Martin’s lip twitches with a short smile, then disappears. “I’m sorry I took so long,” he croaks, then clears his throat. “I wanted to stay and chat with Derek’s mom. Tell her the full story.”
“How’d she take it?”
Martin gives her a rueful half smile. “Let’s just say that Derek’s going to be having some tough weeks ahead of him. Police are talking about putting all four boys on probation, but in the meantime, he’s lost his phone, his computer, his car keys. Basically all privileges. The people in Brownridge will barely see him, let alone Nelson residents. I’ve told him he’s not welcome back here until he can start acting like a decent human being.”
His forehead crinkles as an agonized look crests over his face. “Celia, I am so sorry this happened. I’m so ashamed of his behavior. I don’t understand how… He’s obviously been very good at hiding what he’s been up to.” He runs a hand through his speckled hair again. “Layla tried to tell us. I should have listened to her.” He sniffs. “I should have listened.”
Blinking hard, he looks to the ceiling and lets out a quivering breath. “I’ll understand if you don’t want me to stick around. But before you make your decision, I just need you to know that you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’m so grateful for you, Celia, and I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone.”
Mom’s fighting tears. “We can’t keep going like this.”
My heart dips and I grip the bannister, pressing my forehead between the bars to try and get a better look at my mother. What’s she doing?
Her hand flutters over her chest for a second before picking up the M and L pendants around her neck and racing them up and down the thin, gold chain. “I’ve been so busy being in love with you and trying to make this perfect that I kind of forgot how to be a mother for a while. I need to be there for my kids again.”
“Me too.” He nods. “It’s time we stop acting like this blended family thing is working. It breaks my heart, but I guess we can’t force our kids to like each other.”
“No, we can’t.” She swallows. “But we also can’t let that stop us from being together.”
I hold my breath and grip the bars a little tighter.
A slow smile forms on Martin’s face and he opens his arms wide. Mom rushes into them, fisting the back of his jacket as she rests her chin on his shoulder. Her face is beautiful with relief, and something inside me unravels. Bowing his head, Martin presses his lips against her shoulder and murmurs something I can’t hear.
I’m guessing it’s I love you.
I can’t fight the smile stretching over my face and just go with it, letting it bloom even though it hurts the cut on my lower lip.
After a breathtaking minute, Martin leans back and gives Mom a dry smile. “Some birthday, huh?”
Mom snickers. “I guess it’ll always be memorable.”
“I guess I’ll just have to spend the rest of my life trying to give you better ones.”
“Sounds like a good plan to me.” Mom grins.
Running the back of his finger down her cheek, he leans forward and kisses her, and for the first time since Martin entered my world, I can actually watch.
#38:
Eyes Wide Open
Finn
“Mine!” I jump forward and dig the volleyball. It pops up and Colt sets it close to the net. Jumping high, Tyler spikes the ball down and we score a quick point.
“Yes!” I pump my arm and high-five Mack, still feeling a slight twinge in my torso. It’s been three weeks since my beating, but I’m healing fast. All that’s left of my injuries are patches of pale yellow bruising and a few scabs that will turn into faint scars. Mom’s been making me take it easy, acting like the get well police, but she finally let me off the hook today.
Thank God!
It’s gorgeous out, the sun is shining, the sky is blue, and a row of beauties is lined up on the grass watching us play volleyball. You can’t top that.
Roxy and Michelle are chatting on one side of Layla while Tori and Amy hang out on the other. Sammy’s on the path behind them, practicing tricks on her skateboard; the last thing she’d want to do is lie there sunbathing. The disgruntled frown on her face as she waits for Ty and Darius to finish the game is almost comical. She usually doesn’t wait around for that kind of thing, happy to skate on her own, but she obviously feels like she wants the company today.
I turn back for the next play, but not before casting my eyes over the girls again.
Their bare legs are stretched out on the blankets while they try to catch a few rays on their pale winter skin. The weather’s only just getting warm enough to bring out the shorts and T-shirts, but those girls saw the sun and went for it. They’re all so beautiful, and all of them except Tori and Amy seem to know it. Roxy likes to flaunt that shit; makes her feel superior, I’m guessing. Michelle just seems to follow along…or maybe she’s competing with the sexy brunette. Whatever her reasons, it makes for good entertainment when you watch them sticking out their chests and trying to draw our attention.
I glance at Layla in her cut-off shorts and white crop top. It’s one of those baggy ones that keeps slipping off her shoulder. It’s freaking hot, especially with her long hair loose and free. The ends tickle her exposed skin and she brushes it back, showing off her toned stomach every time she lifts her arm.
She’s wearing big aviator shades so I can’t see her eyes, but I can tell by the curve of her lips that she’s watching me…and kind of enjoying the view.
I grin and move back to my spot. I swear, if I had white skin, I’d be glowing like a red traffic light. I force my gaze back to the game and shift in preparation as the ball comes flying back over the net. Tyler dives for it, knocking it up so I can bump it high for Mack to spike. It comes off, but Darius is quick on his feet and is there to block the ball. It sails straight back over the net…and out of court.
Tyler whoops, then starts laughing at Darius who shakes his head and moves back to chat with Will and the other guys on his four-man team. I slap Colt’s hand and grin when he tips his chin at the girls.
“You’ve got to love the view today.” His eyes land on Tori, who has her head tipped up to the sky. Her wild curls hang back as she basks in the sun, a sweet smile on her cute little face. Her skinny arms prop her up and her short little le
gs are crossed at the ankles.
For once, she’s not talking.
“I’m kissing that neck later,” Colt murmurs before slapping me on the shoulder and heading back to position.
I rub my hand across my bare chest, wiping the sweat away. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Layla bite the edge of her lip. I glance at her and wink when her eyebrows pop up above her shades and she starts wiggling them at me.
Yeah, I’m going to need to quit this game soon.
Bending low, I set for the serve, but it’s kind of hard to focus on the play while my mind’s on Layla and her sweet kisses.
I step forward too late and miss the ball. It hits the grass. Tyler lets out a loud moan while Mack shakes his head, but I just give them both a dopey smile as I grab the ball. Holding it against my hip, I look around the crew. “Gotta split, guys.”
“What?” Tyler glances at his watch. “It’s not even four.”
“Gotta take my girl out.”
“You’re pathetic.” Tyler rolls his eyes at me, but I know it’s just jealousy talking. His eyes dart to Roxy, who’s wiping a finger under her lip as she listens to Michelle. I have no idea what the girl is saying, but Roxy looks kind of disinterested. Her lips rise into a little smirk as she looks our way. I don’t know which one of us she’s smiling at. Probably Mack. In spite of the fact he’s taken, that fool girl still thinks she can convince him to take her to prom.
She’s dreaming.
Thanks to one of the best ideas Layla’s ever had—and a generous donation from Martin—Mack will have a date for prom—he just won’t know it until she shows up three days beforehand. Oh man, I can’t wait to see his face.
I think it’s Layla’s way of making up for what she blurted out at the New Year’s Eve party, and Martin’s way of making up for everything that went down. I’m pretty sure Layla will be able to ask him for anything and he’ll say yes.