Again, Gary made a scratching motion.
I chose to ignore him, focusing instead on the significant looks being passed between Phil and Julius. “Okay, so what? You think maybe she promised one of the AV guys a quick bj behind the orchestra pit if they sent me a spoofed text?” I considered this. “I walk in, then she and her minions pounce and we have a repeat of the Chess Club incident?”
“Perhaps,” Julius replied, stroking his mustache. God, I really hoped he didn’t do that while disguised as me. “This Lindsey, is she prone to acts of petty vengeance?”
“She’s a teenage girl,” Phil said between drags of her cigarette. I reflexively crossed my arms across my chest and glared at her. “Exceptions prove the rule, Jessie. You’re called by a higher power.”
“Okay. So, I won’t go, easy enough.”
“Not so fast.” It was Julius’s turn to shake his head. “It is rarely wise to turn down a chance to gather intelligence, Jessie.”
“Intelligence and Lindsey Stallings don’t really go hand in hand.”
Phil stepped in, blowing a smoke ring. “I get what Julius is saying. This could be a good test run for you in a safe, controlled environment. No powers, but if anyone tries anything, it would be a good gauge for how you’d fare against . . . less teenaged threats.”
“I don’t know,” I replied. “Isn’t using this as a test run to see if I’m the savior of the world a bit . . . overkill? It’s just the AV Club.”
Phil flicked her butt and immediately lit a fresh one. She must have some spell that warded against lung cancer. “Sometimes you gotta work with what life hands you. Besides, I’d rather we start small rather than all of us get caught with our pants around our ankles.”
“Aunt Phil, please. I’ve already got enough disturbing images in my head from the tentacle porn.”
I glared at Gary. “Really? You’re still hung up on that? It was just an innocent response.”
“I’m pretty sure tentacle porn and innocent don’t go together,” he countered.
“Can we get back to the matter at hand?” Julius interrupted. “I would like to note, for the record, that I personally find nothing arousing about tentacles, but that is neither here nor there. Furthermore, I agree with Philomena. Fate has conspired to hand us a mission, however banal, for Jessie. I say we use this opportunity to test all of our readiness.”
“All?” Phil appeared to consider this. “Okay. Maybe that isn’t a bad idea. Help us all get the kinks out before something really is trying to chew our throats out.”
I was all for a bit of laughing in the face of danger, but I hoped she wouldn’t be so cavalier when the real monsters appeared.
“Okay, I’ll make sure the school is magically secure tomorrow night. Gare-bear, I’m going to need you to drop us off at the Southborough safe house so we can grab the Jeep and some supplies. You can take Jessie home afterwards.” After a moment, she smiled at us. “Perk up, you two. It’s our first little adventure.”
Uh-huh. Call me skeptical, but I had a feeling the AV Club and adventure didn’t exactly go hand in hand.
♦ ♦ ♦
I let my mind wander as Gary drove us to Southborough, mostly to tune out Phil and Julius plotting out tomorrow night like it was another of the seemingly endless Mission Impossible sequels.
I focused on the trees, their leaves starting to turn their fall colors, letting my mind wander to the past. Sparring with Gary had forced me to remember punches and kicks I hadn’t done in a while, but I’d need to remember more than just the basics if I wanted to survive—not against the AV Club, but future things that were actually a threat. I thought back to my first teacher, Sensei McAdams. She was loud and raunchy, with a partially shaved head that made her look more like a punk rock star than a martial arts instructor, but her lessons had stuck with me even after other teachers faded into the past.
My breathing slowed as I remembered one of her lessons on balance, much like the leaves on the trees we passed. My shoulders eased, and my body relaxed as I focused on my breath.
“Earth to Jessie!”
“Huh?” I opened my eyes.
“We’re here.”
Julius and Phil were already getting out and heading towards a cute little Cape tucked behind a massive oak tree. Once they’d disappeared inside, Gary let out a deep breath and turned toward me. “Are you okay?”
“Me? Yeah. Just zoning out a bit. Remembering the past.”
“I’m more concerned with the future.”
“Me too. That ubervamp sounds like—”
“I mean the immediate future. I didn’t want to say it with my aunt around, but I’m starting to get a bad feeling about tomorrow.”
“Lindsey Stallings might be nastier than all of the AV Club combined, but I think I can. . .” I trailed off as it hit me. “Wait, did you have another one of your blips?”
“Yes . . . no, it’s hard to say.” When all I did was stare at him, he finally continued. “It’s not always easy to tell what’s a blip and what’s my imagination, especially with the smaller ones. I just, I don’t know. I can’t help but remember what we talked about. How the Icon is a response against the darkness. But what if the darkness also responds against the Icon?”
“Kind of like the weird attracts the weird?”
He nodded.
“I get it. In the comics you could go your whole life not seeing anything strange, but the second a radioactive spider bites you, supervillains suddenly crawl out of the woodwork.”
“Exactly.”
“Well, I can’t say it would surprise me to see Lindsey sprout fangs and suck . . . something other than what she usually sucks.”
We both laughed at that.
“I just want to make sure you’re careful,” he said. “Keep an eye out for the unexpected.”
“The unexpected? I’m wearing a magic wig, surrounded by magicians, and I have a Brit with legendary facial hair impersonating me and macking on my dream guy like it’s the easiest thing in the world. I like to think I’ve learned to handle the unexpected well in a short time.”
“Touché.” Gary put the Audi into drive and pulled out.
“You know, it’s funny.”
“What is?”
“Of all the things out there that should worry me, the one that’s really bugging me seems so silly compared to saving the world.”
“What?”
“Julius. It just . . . feels like cheating somehow. He’s pretty much handed me everything I thought I wanted.”
“A passing grade in English?” I glared at him. “Just kidding.”
“I mean Tony,” I replied before he could say anything that might cause me to deck him. “We have a date Friday, but I’m not sure I can enjoy it because I didn’t earn it.” The more I talked, the more it got to me, until I could feel tears stinging the corners of my eyes. “It’s not fair, damn it!”
Gary glanced over, cringing a tad. “Fate seldom is,” he said softly.
I wiped my eyes and nodded. He probably had a point. Besides, soon I’d likely have bigger problems to worry about. But for now. . . “Hey. Is it against the shiny one code to put a basic bitch in her place?”
“I’ll be sure to look it up.” Gary smiled, then focused on the road again.
We arrived at my cul-de-sac a short while later. As I got out of the car and waved goodbye, I was still beating myself up that I was bothered by something so small in the grand scheme of things.
Silly me. I was right. I did have bigger problems to worry about, and as I opened the front door, one of them was waiting for me in the entranceway.
“So, kiddo, is there something you want to tell me?” Dad asked, tapping his foot.
Chapter Twelve: Busted
I may, in fact, be a hero chosen by destiny to do battle with a creature known as an ubervamp. That’s not even mentioning my magic hair or the fact that I spend my days being impersonated by a British super-spy.
“Um, no, not really,” ended up be
ing the actual words that escaped from my quivering lips.
Dad pointed to the clock on our mantle. I’d lost track of time—go figure. “Jimmy told me when you left and I’ve been checking with the traffic detail. It was all clear from here to Justice Comics, so. . .”
Dad moved aside just enough for me to shuffle miserably inside. He motioned to the sofa and settled down, rubbing his face, and clearly looking for the right words to say. If we both fell down the nonverbal well, it was gonna be one heck of a long night.
I considered telling him everything. Worst case: I’d get a few relaxing evenings down in the juvenile psych ward.
Finally, after an agonizing silence, he cleared his throat. “Look, I don’t mean to be that dad, and I know I haven’t really been, you know, there to talk to you about some things, particularly about, you know—”
Please don’t go there. Gary’s right, we discussed enough tentacles tonight. “I honestly don’t know.”
“Well, you disappeared . . . in a car . . . with a boy.”
I buried my face in my hands. “It’s not like that, Dad! Gary and I just ended up talking. We were arguing over stupid things like anime, stuff like that.” It wasn’t entirely a lie either.
“Jessie Jameson Flores.” My blood still ran cold at the mere mention of my middle name. “I know teenage boys.”
A little bit of color rushed to my cheeks. “You also know me. Better than anyone. What do you think is more likely—me arguing over comics for half the night or making out with some rich dude?” Okay, maybe that wasn’t the most convincing of arguments.
Dad sighed and leaned back against the sofa. “You’ve got me there, kiddo. I’ve become that dad, haven’t I? If you say you were just talking, I believe you, but if you wouldn’t mind interrupting your arguments to send me a quick text next time, then I’ll be much less likely to turn into monster-pa, okay?”
“I’m sorry. I’ll try to do better.”
“You know, we never really had that talk, did we?”
My heart landed all the way down in my kneecaps this time as the heat poured into my face. I needed to derail this train before my hair ignited. “It’s okay, Dad. I, um, I already know.” Terrible phrasing, Jessie! I could see the horror in his eyes. “Not from personal experience. It’s just that Aunt Camilla, she took me aside when I was fourteen and, you know, told me stuff. Do you want to know more, or can I stop now?” Please choose door number two!
I don’t think anyone ever let out such a mighty sigh in the history of all sighs of relief as my dad just did. “I’m glad you clarified that, because I’m not sure how I would’ve handled it otherwise.”
Me neither. “Believe me, my life is way too complicated for boys right now.”
“I love hearing that, I really do, but you know that you have to have a little balance in your life. Dating isn’t verboten, as long as I approve of the guy—”
“And I don’t disappear on you. I get it. I’m sorry for the accidental drama, too. We cool?”
“We’re never not cool, Jessie. You know that. Unless you still have homework left to do.”
“All done, just have some . . . notes to review before bed.”
Dad raised a brow.
“Scout’s honor!” He seemed appeased enough for me to slip away. I made it to the base of the stairs when the idea hit. “Oh, do you think Uncle Jimmy would be okay if I cut my hours so I could start taking classes again? I realized that I miss martial arts more than I thought.”
Dad broke into a huge grin. “Self-defense? I don’t think either of us would have a problem with you knowing how to defend yourself.”
“Awesome, thanks!” I started up the stairs, figuring I should quit while I was ahead.
“Oh, hey, kiddo?” Dad called out.
“Yeah?”
“I almost forgot. Yours isn’t the only martial arts news in the family. Diego has an exhibition fight in Boston on Friday. He’s finally getting a chance to show off for some big-time recruiters and guess who’s got ringside seats.”
Oh no, not Friday, any day but Friday. “Uncle Jimmy and Dylan?”
“You and me, kiddo, cheering on your cousin. We can even get pizza in the North End if you want.”
“That’s great, Dad, but—”
“And just so you don’t think I’m that dad, I got a ticket for your boyfriend, too. Oh, sorry, I mean your friend who happens to be a boy. I even promise not to harass him . . . much, police honor. How’s that sound?”
I thought about it for a second, then put on my best smile. “Great!” After all, it’s not like I couldn’t be two places at the same time, right? “Can’t wait.”
Dad beamed and gave me another of his cheesy thumbs-up. No amount of pent up teenage angst could bring me to kill his buzz.
I still had to make it all happen, though. I turned, raced up the stairs, and simultaneously tore the wig off my head and opened my phone.
Guess who has ringside seats to see my cousin kick some ass? Ooh, that got instant three-dot action from Gary’s end.
WTF?
Dad surprised me. Got us ringside seats for Friday up in Boston.
Us?!?!
Did I stutter?
Hold on. Boston? Gary texted back
Yes.
Yeah, not good. You know what’s in Boston, right?
Duh, I texted back. But come on. It’s just one night and one gym. Those bloodsuckers can’t be everywhere, can they?
I’d meant that last part as a joke. However, Gary left me hanging afterwards, making me wonder if I’d accidentally opened a can of worms. Well, either that or his phone died. Hard to tell sometimes.
Either way, there’d be plenty of time to prepare for vampires. My date with destiny was still in the future—hopefully far in the future. As for tomorrow, all I had to worry about was the AV Club and one jealous airhead.
How hard could it be?
Chapter Thirteen: Back to the Beginning
“That’s not Lindsey Frickin’ Stallings.”
Gary and I were crouched behind the lab tables in Mrs. Smith’s chem room, his laptop glowing in the otherwise darkened space. Julius had finagled more of his superspy magic, somehow tapping into the school’s security cameras. It had seemed a bit much at first. After all, this was only a training run with the AC Club standing in for a real threat, but now I found myself grateful we’d made the effort.
The grainy image showed some scary looking dude slipping in the back door nearest the auditorium. Instead of wearing a hoodie like a normal creeper, or wannabe hero, this guy wore a duster with a big triangle cowl over his head. “Pretty sure he’s not in the AV Club.”
“A strange guy, sneaking into a high school? Not suspicious at all,” Gary muttered, squinting at the screen. Phil was behind us, waving her hands over a petri dish filled with water.
I nudged Gary. “Is that a magic thing?”
“From what I can tell when I’m not being interrupted,” she said. “He’s looking for trouble . . . and I’m pretty sure he isn’t human.”
“You can tell all of that?”
“She’s scrying, Jessie.” I felt like Gary missed a “Duh” at the end. “Using magic to spy on people is a bit more thorough than a webcam.”
“Okay, so why are we staring at a laptop if you have magic remote viewing?”
“Because it’s not that easy when people are looking over your shoulder,” Phil snapped.
Someone is cranky this evening. “When you say not human—”
Phil gnawed at her lip. “Somehow, for some reason, there’s a vampire walking around in your high school.”
That didn’t add up. “If he’s a vampire, how come we can see him on camera? I thought vampires didn’t have reflections.”
“That’s a stupid movie myth,” Gary said, still staring at the screen. “Most of the shit about vamps is. Running water doesn’t do anything, and crosses only work if you have actual faith in them.”
“Like in Fright Night?”
/> He nodded.
“What about flying?”
Gary looked up and blinked a few times. He looked over to Phil. “Actually, I’m not entirely sure. Aunt Phil?”
“Only when on the receiving end of a fist of force,” she murmured, furrowing her brows. The guy on the screen pulled back his hood, revealing an impressive mullet. “I don’t recognize this guy, but that awful haircut makes me think we’re dealing with a vamp turned in the late eighties, maybe early nineties.”
“Eighties,” Gary said. “Look at all that feathering.”
“So, why is Longshot at my school? And where’s Lindsey?” The guy on screen paused in front of the trophy case in the main hall. He seemed completely absorbed by something on the center shelf. Even in standard-def, I could pick up his wistfulness. “Is it possible that this is just a coincidence and he’s a former student walking down memory lane?”
“Maybe, but here and now, right when you’re supposed to be there? Come on. Aunt Phil, can you scry the backstage area? There’s no camera there.”
I called their attention over as another figure stepped into the frame on the laptop—one of the janitors. He shuffled into the hallway and stopped cold as he saw the stranger.
“Why is there no sound?” We could only watch as the janitor waggled his mop at the obviously bemused intruder. My heart leapt in my chest as the intruder stepped forward and shoved the janitor out of our view. “We have to help him.”
“We don’t know if. . .” Phil trailed off as a splatter of something dark sprayed the floor of the hall from the direction the two combatants had stepped. The stranger stepped back into view, this time with the janitor’s mop, and started wiping down the mess. “Okay, I guess we do know.”
“We have to do something,” I cried. This was it. This was that trite moment in every origin story where the reluctant hero had to either stand up or run away. Oh God, I’d become a living, breathing comic book trope.
I looked down at my hoodie. I’d even dressed the part. This was crazy, 100% mental, but if I didn’t do something, what kind of person would I be?
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