“She will.” Stone placed a hand on his shoulder. “We’ve seen the way she looks at you like you hung the moon. She’s crazy about you.”
He met his buddy’s gaze head-on. “She’s also pregnant.”
The room grew silent. No one moved. No one blinked. Just stared at him with their mouths stuck open.
Stone was the first to recover. He blinked, then squeezed his shoulder. “Congratulations, man. That’s terrific.”
Then Leo went through one backslapping handshake after another. Starting with Brick, followed by Vince. Then the door guard, who finally left his perch.
“It is a good thing, right?” Cord asked. “You okay with being a dad?”
Every damn emotion in the alphabet hit Leo at once. After a few stuttered heartbeats, he finally nodded, then shoved a hand through his hair. “What if I suck at it, though? I don’t want to ruin this child’s life. Don’t want to mess it up.”
Stone shook his head. “Again, no one’s perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. The fact that you’re concerned about it will keep you motivated to do your best. And that’s all anyone could ask. I think you’re going to make a fantastic father.”
“Hell yeah.” Vince grinned. “You help so many people.”
“I do what you all do. Nothing more.” He snorted. “Except screw up. I’m not the type to inspire.”
Stone stilled. “Are you serious? Leo, you’re the reason half the veterans chose to give At-Ease a chance.”
“I am?” His heart stuttered again. “What do you mean? Why?”
“Because you’ve lived in the shadows where some still dwell. You survived, and now thrive,” Stone said. “You give them hope that they can climb out, too. You’re living proof it is possible.”
Well, hell. Air left his lungs, and it felt like Lula Belle kicked him in the ribs.
“You get them, and they gravitate toward you,” Brick said.
Vince pointed at him. “They get acceptance, not judgment, from you. That’s huge. So huge, man.”
“Some look up to you,” Cord said, and effectively knocked the air from Leo’s lungs again.
Who the hell would look up to him?
“Like Tucker,” Stone said. “He’s come to me on several occasions the past two weeks to thank me for putting him on your crew. And I noticed you got him to group therapy yesterday.”
The kid even stayed until the end. Leo already promised to go with him again next week.
“I hope you see how you’re more than motivational,” Vince said. “You’re the reason At-Ease is here.”
“Because I fucked up,” he grumbled.
Stone smiled. “Yeah, and because of that fuckup, how many lives have we changed? Made bearable? Saved?”
Emotions swirled in Leo’s chest, tightening it to full capacity.
“There are times things happen in life for a reason,” Cord said, and it immediately reminded Leo of his grandmother’s words.
“Gram said something similar the other day.” He gave a half smile. “Sometimes someone needs to fall in order to lift others up.”
But there’d be no more falling back into his pit of self-pity and despair. That pit was gone. It was time to grow. To rid himself of those damn demons. To kill off the person he was before. It was time to let go. Time to say goodbye to the broken man—the part of his psyche that always held him down—and embrace the man he had become because of his history. The whole man who acknowledged his past, both dark and light, and moved on. The man Kaydee always saw. The man Kaydee…and their baby deserved.
By putting that old part of himself to rest, Leo felt stronger. Calmer. Like a wiser, better version of himself.
Brick leaned forward. “Damn. I love your Gram.”
“Like it or not, Leo,” Stone said, “you are the savior of At-Ease.”
Savior…
He may be wiser, but he was no one’s savior. He was just a guy.
“You’ve saved people while on active duty and you continue to save them now. You’re going to make a hell of a dad.” Vince slapped his back. “Emma and the girls are going to flip when they find out about the baby.”
He was still trying to process the savior and saving lives thing, but the instant Vince mentioned Leo was going to be a dad, warmth shot through his body and straightened his spine.
“As long as Beth doesn’t want one of her own.” Brick shivered. “Our wedding is rushing close. I’d like to survive that first.”
Stone laughed. “You’re going to do fine. There’s nothing to it. Cord and I made it through without a scratch.”
“Yep,” Cord said. “Just agree to anything my sister wants and you’re golden.”
Vince turned to him. “Now, how can we help you with Kaydee?”
He inhaled and thought for a moment. The image of her face as he left her kitchen flashed through his mind. The hurt he was trying to shield her from was blatant in the arms crossed over her stomach and her watery eyes. His own stomach clenched hard. She’d been holding back tears…holding herself as if hugging would keep it all in.
He needed to fix it. Make up for it. Jesus, he owed her so much. He owed her everything. “I need to go back there and grovel.”
“Chocolates are good,” Brick said. “Beth can eat my weight in them.”
Momentarily pulled out of his misery, Leo snorted at the analogy. “You’re right. I’ve seen her devour one of Emma’s cakes in under a minute. Without coming up for air.”
“Roses,” Stone said. “Jovy loves them.”
“Do you have the tile-cutting saw?” Cord asked.
Brick turned to look at his buddy like his brains were oozing out of his ears. “Saw? Jesus, Cord. Really? Some romantic you are. I feel sorry for Haley on Valentine’s Day. You probably buy her kitchen appliances. Or weight-loss DVDs.”
Leo snorted again, next to a chuckling Stone.
“I wasn’t suggesting it as a gift for Kaydee,” Cord said with an eye roll. “You all seem to have that covered. I was asking if he was done with the saw because I need it tomorrow to work on a bathroom at home. It’s a surprise for Haley.”
“Yeah, I finished with it this morning,” Leo said. “It’s in the back of my truck.”
Brick rose from the couch. “Come on, Cord. I’ll help you load it.”
“This mean we’re done?” He motioned toward the door. “I’m allowed to leave this room.”
“Depends.” Cord stared at him. “You still think you’re unworthy of Kaydee?”
He raised a brow. “Hell yeah. I’ll never be worthy of her. She’s a saint.”
A smile tugged Cord’s lips. “Good answer.”
“Agreed.” Stone slapped a hand on his shoulder and walked with him toward the door. “Let’s go brainstorm more groveling ideas.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Leo walked with Stone and Vince to the rec room, where the women were binge-watching a show in the far corner. The blind superhero dude again. He smiled at the matching grimaces on his buddies’ faces when their women sighed over the shirtless guy on the screen.
“Doesn’t even have that much meat on his bones,” Vince grumbled, his top lip curling as he looked over at Emma leaning forward in her chair, like Beth, Jovy, and Haley, as if to get close enough to the big-ass TV to lick the screen.
“I know.” Stone frowned and shook his head. “Their fascination makes no sense to me.”
What fascinated Leo was the fact that the women were so riveted by the show that they tuned everything out, including them. No one even glanced their way.
“No, but it does make for a good night later.” Vince waggled his brows, and Leo tried not to throw up in his mouth.
With luck, Leo’s good night would include forgiveness from the woman who owned his heart. As soon as he figured out how to make it up to her.
Tension slowly ebbed from his body, and he sank into one of the overstuffed chairs in the middle of the room with a sigh. “So that sucked,” he said, closing his eyes. “Glad it’s ove
r, though.”
“I’m fuckin’ proud of you, man,” Stone said.
Leo opened his eyes to find his buddy standing in front of him with a beer in each hand and a gray gaze gleaming with pride.
Unsure what to do with the positive emotions flooding his chest, Leo nodded and took the beer Stone offered.
“Yeah. Me, too.” Vince grinned.
He shrugged. “Thanks.”
Stone cocked his head, and a huge smile ate up his face. “I know I said this earlier, but I’m going to say it again. You’re going to make a hell of a dad.”
He glanced over at the girls to see if they’d heard, but their attention was still on the screen. Which was a good thing, because all those emotions in Leo’s chest backed up into his damn throat and he had to clear it.
“Thanks,” he told his buddy again, but apparently it wasn’t good enough for Mother Hen. Stone held out his hand, forcing Leo to put his beer down, then stand for a proper backslapping.
“I’m happy for you,” Stone said, releasing him so Vince could take over.
“Yeah, me, too,” Vince repeated his earlier response through a grin that rivaled Stone’s.
He smiled and nodded, but he’d be happier in Dallas.
“Now,” Stone began as they all sat down. “As we were saying, what can we do to help you with Kaydee?”
Leo blew out a breath. “No clue.”
“It’s getting late. Going to head up there tonight?” Vince asked.
He glanced out the siding glass door, noting dusk darkening the sky. Damn. He rubbed the back of his neck. “I wanted to, but by the time I drive up there she’d probably be asleep. I think the baby’s making her tired.”
“Baby?” Beth’s high-pitched, squeaky tone jerked his head back.
“Of course the women would hear that word.” Vince grinned. “Now we know what word to use to pull them from their superhero stupor.”
“Who’s having a baby?” Jovy’s overbright gaze shot to him. “You and Kaydee?”
He nodded but had no time to do or say more, because Emma rushed right over, pulled him out of his chair, and hugged him tight. “I’m so happy for you two. Oh my God. This is…oh my God.”
Vince chuckled. “Think you covered that already, hun.”
Haley hugged him next. “Congratulations.”
Jovy followed. “Where is Kaydee?” she asked, glancing around.
“Home,” he said, his chest suddenly too tight to say more.
Stone’s gaze met his. “Baby’s making her tired.”
He owed his buddy one for trying to cover up his stupidity. But the women were starting to frown, so questions were eminent.
Haley was the first to call him out. “And you’re sitting here and not there…why?”
“Because I’m an ass,” he said, just as Cord and Brick walked in.
“Oh, we’re at the good part again.” Brick grinned and waved at him. “Carry on. Oh, wait. Let me grab a beer and sit down first. I don’t want to miss anything.”
He wouldn’t flip him off with the girls right there. Brick knew it, too. His lips twitched. The bastard.
“So, tell us what’s going on,” Emma said, sliding her arm around Vince’s waist as the guy dropped his around her shoulders.
“The usual,” Vince answered for him with a grin. “He needs to grovel.”
Big-time.
Cord came over and hauled Haley’s back against his chest, banding his arms around her as he kissed her neck. Then he lifted his head and met Leo’s gaze. “Stuffed animal.”
“Dude.” Brick snorted. “Did you just call your wife a stuffed animal?”
Cord eye-rolled his buddy again and shook his head. “Just a suggestion for the groveling aids.”
Leo chuckled. “I’ll add it to the list. But it’s too late to go up to see her. Or to call. I don’t want to wake her, so it looks like I’ll have to wait until morning to head to Dallas.”
“No need.” Jovy shook her head. “Kaydee’s coming here tomorrow afternoon to cut hair.”
He frowned, not remembering that plan. “She is?”
“Yeah,” Jovy said as Stone pulled her down onto his lap. “I talked to her about it on Thursday. Didn’t she tell you?”
He shook his head. Kind of hard when they weren’t communicating. And they really hadn’t said too much this week. His fault. He only stopped in twice. Both times briefly. Just enough time to show his first-class ass act.
“Well, no worries.” Emma smiled. “You have tonight and tomorrow morning to practice your groveling skills.”
Laughter went up around the room. Funny part was, he was going to need every damn second to prepare.
Chapter Twenty-Two
It was late Sunday afternoon by the time Kaydee finished the last of her haircuts at the ranch. She was kind of proud of herself for keeping it together. Not once, the whole day, had she given in to the tears that sprang up out of nowhere.
Darn out-of-control pregnancy hormones.
She didn’t do tears, not since her childhood. That’d cured her of them. Or so she thought. Now she was pregnant and a basket case.
Nuts.
So were her out-of-control feelings for Leo. She reined them in, too. At least, she tried. It was crazy how she’d trekked through most of her life with a tight grip on her emotions, corralling them, allowing only a few select people through the gate. Fi, her parents, her grandfather, Ava, and then she eventually took a chance and let Leo in.
And now she was feeling everything. Too much. And it wasn’t the baby. No. This all started the moment she’d met Leo, then escalated when they’d kissed. Ever since their first one, she’d been an emotion receptor or something. They overflowed in her, but it was okay. He made it all good. Made her feel…amazing.
But now…without…
She inhaled and cut that train of thought right off, then did her best to stuff those unwanted emotions back in the caboose. Her time here was up. She could pack up and leave. Maybe without even talking to Leo.
She had mixed emotions about that.
Coming here today, Kaydee had kind of hoped to run into him. Even had a nice fantasy about it. He’d take one look at her, tell her he was sorry, beg her forgiveness, hold her close, and never let her go.
A snort rumbled up her throat but came out as a half sob. Which she promptly covered up with a cough.
Fi glanced over at her. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” She lied with a smile. “Just dust or hair or something in my throat.”
More like a piece of her broken heart.
Lordy, she really couldn’t wait to see the doctor this week. Surely he had some kind of pregnancy emotion supplement or something like that to decrease them. She really had to go nine months like this?
Not going to make it, she thought as she folded her cape and shoved it into her case, along with her scissors and clippers.
Without Leo around to soak up the overabundance of feelings, she was going to burn out. She sighed. They should talk. Probably. Maybe. He’d left without confirming it yesterday. Not much more she could do or say, although God, she wanted to.
Damn, those darn tears again. Ducking her head to pretend she had more to pack, she made a quick swipe of her face, hoping no one saw. That was a conversation she could do without.
She just wanted to go home and let go of her control in private.
“Thanks so much for today,” Jovy said, walking toward them. “You both made a lot of people happy.”
They decided to hold the clinic in the rec room at the house because it was familiar to some and had a friendly, relaxed vibe. Group therapy was held there, plus the pool table gave the ones waiting something to do.
Fi smiled and waved a hand. “Ah. We were happy to. This was a great idea.”
Kaydee decided to let those two talk. She wasn’t much in the mood anyhow. Kind of all talked out from the conversations with those she’d worked on, and the fussing and gushing from the women about the baby when sh
e’d first arrived.
Shock had hit her first, followed by hope—that mean bitch. It’d resurfaced to flutter in her chest, making her think things might actually be okay. Why would Leo tell them about the baby if he wasn’t happy?
Then reality had set in and snuffed hope out cold. If he was happy he would’ve come back last night. Or called. Or come over this morning or made a damn effort to seek her out. She was on his ranch, for God’s sake.
No. It’d probably just slipped out of his mouth like it had slipped out of hers yesterday.
Inhaling, she snapped her case shut and stood. “Well, I’m ready if you are, Fi,” she said, hoping her friend picked up on her “get me the hell out of here” vibe.
Fi had insisted on driving today, and Kaydee let her, happy to close her eyes and take a nap on the way down. Exactly what she planned to do on the way home. At least her crazy fatigue was handy for something.
Fi exchanged a look with Jovy before she met her gaze. “Sure.”
Kaydee was too tired to wonder what that was all about. She’d worry later. Right now, she was ready to go.
“Don’t forget this,” Jovy said, handing Fiona the donation jar that they tried all day to convince the woman they didn’t want. It fell on deaf ears. Stone had warned them his wife was stubborn. “And you don’t need to leave yet,” Jovy said. “Why don’t you stay for some cake or Vince’s cannoli? They really are to die for. And there’s a delivery coming later you’re going to want to see. Trust me.”
As tempting as all that sounded, especially the cannoli part, Kaydee shook her head. “No thanks.” She glanced sideways at Jovy as they walked to the front door. “I’m kind of beat, sorry. Maybe next time.”
If she thought sticking around to see Leo would help, she would, but she was a realist. It was best to leave. He needed to come to his own conclusion about them. No sense in trying to tip the scale her way.
“Of course.” The woman stopped as they reached the front door. “Speaking of next time, are you both good with keeping the clinic on the last Sunday of every month?
She glanced at Fi, who nodded. “That works.”
Coming here every month was going to kill her if Leo decided he didn’t want to be a part of her life…or the baby’s, but she’d do it for the veterans. And maybe Leo would remain scarce like today, although his absence didn’t alleviate the ache pressing against her chest.
The Army Ranger's Surprise (the Men of At-Ease Ranch) Page 16