She felt like such an idiot. She should have thought about tying the pony’s reins, or at least holding them as she got down. Of course he’d move.
Kit was probably very glad their supposed romance was only a charade. He was used to competent people who could handle themselves around livestock, not ignorant ones who couldn’t get out of a pony cart without falling.
She wished she could go home. Hide in her room until she felt better. She wished he’d stayed and talked to her. Maybe even kissed her. Fretfully she tried to get comfortable.
Finally she drifted into a light sleep.
The doctor came after dinner and pronounced a slight concussion, recommending bed rest for a couple of days.
“I can’t stay here. This is Kit’s bed. Where would he sleep?” she asked Sally, who had stayed with her while the doctor was there.
“He can sleep on the sofa,” Kit said from the door. “How is she, Doctor?”
“Be fine in a couple of days. But I recommend complete bed rest until then.”
“I can go home,” Kelly said.
“No.” Kit didn’t even look at her. He was talking to the doctor. “She can stay here. The sofa in the den is long enough for me to sleep on a couple of nights. Sally can see to her meals and things.”
“Kit…”
“I think he’s right, Kelly. You need someone to get you something to eat, and it won’t be any extra trouble for us to look after you,” Sally said earnestly.
“Of course it is.”
She should be arguing more forcefully, but her head was pounding, her shoulder aching and her hip throbbing. All she wanted to do was escape the aches that racked her. She wasn’t up to arguing.
“Here, some painkillers. Take two now, and tomorrow as you need them. I think you’ll be fine within a day or two.” The doctor gave her a packet, nodded to Sally and Kit and left.
“I’ll get some water so you can take them now,” Sally said, following behind the doctor.
Kit came into the room, up to the side of the bed.
“Don’t fret, honey. It’ll just make your headache worse,” he said, reaching out to brush her hair back from her forehead.
“I don’t want you to sleep on the sofa,” she murmured fretfully.
“I’ve slept in worse places. Though I’d rather be sleeping there with you,” he said softly, one eye on the door for Sally’s return.
She opened her eyes and smiled slowly. “Sorry, cowboy, not tonight. I have a headache.”
He chuckled and reached out to thread the fingers of his hand through hers, squeezing slightly, holding her smaller hand in his. “God, you scared me,” he said softly, his thumb tracing the soft skin on the back of her hand, his dark blue eyes staring down into hers.
“Sorry,” she said slowly. Despite the headache and aches and bruises elsewhere, she was conscious of the tingling in her hand and arm from his touch. She wanted him to kiss her, chase away the pain and make her forget how dumb she’d been.
“Oops, am I intruding?” Sally asked, pausing in the doorway, her eyes on their linked hands.
“Yes, but come in anyway. She needs the pain pills.” Kit stepped back and waited while Sally helped Kelly take two pills. She set the rest of the pills and water on the bedside table.
“Need anything else?” Sally asked.
“No, thanks for everything.” Kelly’s voice was tired.
“Good night, then.” Sally threw a saucy glance at Kit and left the room, pulling the door shut behind her.
Kit smiled grimly. Apparently their pretense was working with his sister-in-law. It was working with everyone, including himself.
Kelly opened her eyes and looked at him. “I shouldn’t be taking your bed.”
“Don’t worry about it, honey, just get better.” He leaned over and brushed his lips against her forehead, near the bandage. “See you later.”
Kit worked in the office all evening, trying to keep his mind occupied, trying to forget the sight of Kelly lying in the dust, with him helpless to move her. But the image reappeared and reappeared. If it hadn’t been for Pete, she might have had to lie there for hours.
His hand tightened into a fist and he stared out into the dark night sky. He’d known since the accident that he couldn’t expect to have a normal life. First the bull, then Althea had made sure of that. But for the past few days he’d almost let himself think about it, almost believed it would be possible.
That had to stop. It was obvious it wouldn’t work. It wouldn’t be fair to Kelly. Or himself.
Even as he said it, he wanted to deny it. She’d felt so good in his arms. Her body had been so soft and feminine, her loving so tempestuous. He ached in sudden longing and desire, wanting to hold her, kiss her, love her just one more time.
He heard Clint and Sally go to bed. For a moment jealousy flashed through him at their happiness. What a bastard he was to resent his brother’s happiness. He’d known the risks of the rodeo. He’d thrived on the danger and hair-raising chances. Only somehow he’d never truly thought he’d be injured.
Or what the full extent of that injury would entail. It was more than just a useless right leg. It meant he was dependent on his brother and wife, unable to do the kinds of things he had always loved. It meant he couldn’t offer a woman any kind of marriage that would appeal to her. The years stretched out dismally before him. Long and endless and lonely.
The house grew quiet around him. The night was still and dark. Hours passed and Kit remained staring out the window at the past. Finally he switched off the lamp and rose. She was so close. It wouldn’t hurt for one more night.
He opened the door to his room and shut it behind him. Slowly crossing until he was beside the bed, he sank down and eased off his boots. Lying back against the pillows fully dressed, he turned toward Kelly. He could barely see her in the faint light. She was on her back, asleep.
Slowly he reached out, pulling her onto him, nestling her head gently against his shoulder. Soothing back her hair, careful of the bandage.
“Umm. Kit?” she murmured, still half asleep.
“Shh, honey. Just sleep.” His fingers gently combed through her soft waves, rubbing her head slightly, hoping to ease the pain that engulfed her.
“I love you,” she said softly and drifted back to sleep.
His eyes stayed open in shock. Was she dreaming? Hell of a thing to say to a man holding her in bed. Did she mean it? What a nightmare if she did! He couldn’t offer her anything. He’d have to make that clear in the morning. Let her know when she was better that they’d go back to being friends. That he’d give up their pretense. Better face Althea with the truth than give Kelly any cause to think their future could be together.
She smelled so sweet, and the feel of her in his arms was a delight. She snuggled against him as Kit held her, his hands absorbing the touch of her skin against his fingertips, the satiny texture of her hair, the warmth of her breath against his chest.
“I love you, too, darlin’. And there’s not a damned thing I can do about it,” he said softly.
When Kelly awoke the next morning she felt almost fit again, but a quick trip to the bathroom convinced her otherwise. She was relieved to return to bed, shakily drawing the covers over her and resting her head back against the pillows. The pounding eased immediately.
She was alone. Had she dreamed last night that Kit had come to bed with her? She tried to remember, but she had dreams about him often. Had last night just been another?
“Good morning. How do you feel?” Sally breezed in after sticking her head around the door. She brought a tray of scrambled eggs, bacon, biscuits and tea.
“Better. But my head started to swim when I used the bathroom.”
“Doctor said a couple of days in bed. That means all day today.”
“I should get up.”
“Nonsense. Now you eat and I’ll visit while you do.”
Kelly sat up gingerly and put the tray on her lap. The food was delicious and she felt
pampered to be served in bed. Her headache was not as strong as yesterday. Maybe it would go away soon. She’d taken two more of the pain pills earlier and they were starting to take effect.
“Kit and Clint already gone out?” she asked, trying to be casual.
“Yes. Won’t be home for lunch, either. There’s a lot to do on a cattle ranch, and we don’t have a lot of hired help this time of year. What with inoculations, checking the fencing, the water, keeping tally of the herd, moving them from one pasture to another and all the government paperwork, it’s a hard job. And you never know ahead of time what the beef will sell for.”
“And you love being a part of it,” Kelly said, smiling at her enthusiasm.
“I sure do. Of course, my folks do it, too, so I’ve known ranching all my life. I help the guys when things get hectic,” Sally said.
“Have you known the Lockford men all your life?” Kelly asked, again conscious of the difference in their lives. She’d been shunted from home to home, and had no friends she’d known for years. Sally came from such a stable background. Did she appreciate it?
“Sure have. Though they are older than me. Clint said he noticed me when I was a senior in high school, but couldn’t do anything about it then. I was too young.” She giggled softly. “So he waited and asked me out three days after graduation. Then he waited until I tried college before asking me to marry him.”
“Did you like college?”
“No. I only went two years.” She sighed gently. “We were to be married that fall, but that’s when Kit was so badly injured. When Clint offered to help him out on his ranch, Clint postponed our wedding. He said he had to wait and see how much care Kit needed. He didn’t want to tie me down. He was so stubborn about it, even when I told him there would never be anyone else for me.”
Kelly looked at her, puzzled. “They weren’t partners before?”
“No. Clint worked at his dad’s place. We’d even talked about his taking over my folks’ place when they get too tired of doing it. I’m an only child, you see. Then the accident happened. I worried for a long time that we wouldn’t get married. But we finally did and things have worked out great.”
“And does Kit take a lot of care?” Kelly asked carefully.
“None. I cook the meals, but he could if he wanted. He can do anything he wants, I think.”
“Me, too.” Kelly finished the last of her tea and gently replaced her cup. “In fact, I told him I think he should try riding again.”
Sally looked surprised. “Oh, Kelly, I don’t think he can do that.”
“He won’t know if he doesn’t try. He misses it so much. He’s not happy.”
“You wouldn’t be either, Kelly, if you’d lost your livelihood and the woman you loved,” Sally explained.
Kelly kept quiet about Althea, knowing Sally was her friend. But she wished she could let her know how despicable she thought the other woman was, how awful her treatment of Kit had been when he’d been in the hospital.
Instead, she shrugged. “So maybe he should find another woman to love.”
Sally looked at her for a long time. “I don’t know if he can. Love a woman, I mean. Physically, I mean.”
Kelly met her gaze. “Yes, he can,” she said, her eyes steady.
“Well, maybe, but riding’s different.”
“He told me the doctors said he might never walk, yet he’s done that.”
“With crutches,” Sally clarified.
Kelly shrugged. “So, he’s still mobile.”
“They also said there was a chance he’d have even more mobility if he had another operation, but he won’t have it. I think he’s gone as far as he can,” Sally said.
“What operation?”
Sally shook her head. “I don’t know all about it. Clint just told me one night that Kit was adamant about refusing any more surgery. I think he’s resigned himself to what he has now.”
Kelly was thoughtful. Another operation might make a difference, and Kit wasn’t taking the risk? It didn’t sound like him. Was there more to it than Sally knew? Hadn’t Molly said something about further operations? Why hadn’t Kit mentioned it to her?
Sally’s eyes dropped to the empty plate on Kelly’s tray. “I’ll clear that away for you.” She took the tray and left the room, her face troubled. Kelly leaned back and scooted down in the bed, thinking about the situation at the ranch. Did Sally and Clint ever want their own place? Were they content to live with Kit forever? Replete from breakfast and with the pills easing the throbbing in her body, she drifted back to sleep.
By afternoon she was bored. She slept as much as she could, wondering if she’d be able to sleep tonight. She’d scanned all the magazines Sally had brought her with lunch, finding farm magazines not quite her thing. She wished she had the mystery she’d started a couple of days ago, or her sketch pad. Stirring restlessly on the bed, she straightened the covers and glanced out the window.
The rolling, grass-covered hills hadn’t changed since the last time she’d looked. Nothing moved in the wide expanse. Even the grass was still in the afternoon sun. No air stirred, no birds trilled. The timeless tranquility of the land was undisturbed.
“Kelly, up for company?” Sally smiled at her in the doorway.
“Delighted, but I shouldn’t take up your time. I ought to be at home,” Kelly murmured.
“We went through that already. You’re not a bit of trouble. And there’d be no one at your place to help you.”
“Molly Benson,” Kelly countered.
“She’s too old to be traipsing up and down your steps. Truth to be told, I’m glad of the company.” Sally perched on the chair near the bed and smiled at her guest. “It gets a little lonely here during the days. I like it better when I’m helping out on the range. At least I get to spend the day with Clint then.”
“I’ll be fine in a couple of days,” Kelly murmured, feeling the tension building behind her forehead. Her head was beginning to ache again, just when she thought she was getting better.
“How about some iced tea?” Sally asked brightly, hopping up. She was back in only minutes. “Is everything all right?” she asked, setting down the tray of tea and handing Kelly a frosty glass.
“Sure, my head aches but I’ll take another pill. Tell me about the expansion plans Kit and Clint were discussing the other evening.”
With a happy nod, Sally began chatting about ranch issues, mutual friends and the Lockford plans for the future. Carefully explaining who people were, and some of the ranching terms she used, Sally made sure Kelly understood everything.
Kelly knew nothing of ranching or livestock. She listened avidly as Sally talked, soaking in everything she said. She delighted in the stories about the families in the area. She had no family of her own and longed for one. At one point Kelly wondered how Sally saw her. A nobody from the city coming in and trying to fit into the small community?
Sure, she had no family, but she wasn’t exactly a nobody. She had lots of great friends and had built a satisfactory career all by herself. With talent alone. Maybe she should remember that and not long so much for the family she didn’t have.
Just then the screen door slammed.
“Sally?” Kit’s voice called.
“I’m in with Kelly,” she called back.
“How’re you feeling, Kelly?” Kit asked, appearing in the doorway. Moving to the far side of the bed, he leaned against his crutches and stared down at her, taking in the paleness of her skin, the dark bruise showing more clearly today than before.
“Better,” she said, meeting his eyes for a second before sliding hers away. She tingled all over from his caring look.
“Clint back?” Sally asked, standing.
“Yes, he’s in the barn.”
She smiled and with a murmur about seeing them later took off to find her husband.
Kit waited until she’d left, then reached out and took Kelly’s chin, turning her to face him again.
“How do you really fee
l?” he asked quietly.
“Like hell. My head keeps pounding, even with the pills. My hip is sore if I roll on it. How’s the pony?”
“Sadder than usual,” he said, his eyes dancing.
She made a face, then winced as the scrape on her forehead pulled. “Listen to me, Kit Lockford. I’m wounded. I don’t need your mocking ways in my face now. I know you don’t think the pony can look sad—”
“Oh, sweetheart, of course he’s sad. He realized he’s the reason he can’t see you for a few days and his little black head is drooping.”
She giggled softly. “Don’t make fun of me.”
His hand smoothed back her hair, tangling gently with the waves and combing through the soft tresses as he gazed down at her. “Maybe I’ll wait until you’re feeling better,” he conceded.
She smiled up at him, relishing the feel of his fingers in her hair, reveling in the shimmering excitement that built when she was near him. She was lost gazing into his warm eyes and wondered if she’d ever get tired of being with him. If she’d ever get over longing to spend every moment of her day with him.
“Kit, did you sleep in here last night?” she asked at last.
He smiled and nodded. “But I left before Clint got up.”
“I thought I had dreamed it, but wasn’t sure.”
“Do you have a lot of dreams about me?” he asked whimsically.
She went still, unwilling to admit it, yet curious if he ever dreamed of her. “Some,” she said slowly.
He sat on the bed, placed the crutches against the wall and leaned back, threading his fingers through hers and looking down at her as she lay against the pillows. “Tell me what they’re about,” he invited in a soft, sexy drawl.
It was like fine wine, intoxicating every cell in her body. She couldn’t draw her eyes away; she was caught in the snare of his gaze. Heat stole into her cheeks and her heart tripped faster at his look. She couldn’t reveal how she dreamed about him, how erotic those dreams were. But he was waiting for her to speak.
Saying the first thing that came to mind, she did. “Why didn’t you tell me there is another operation that might help?”
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