by Dora Hiers
“I can’t, Gunner. I’ve never explained things, th-those kinds of things to Tessa. And…her friend Katie is here and…they already made plans to watch a movie this afternoon. I…I need more time to think.”
“Mark may not have more time, Mina.”
She gulped, inhaled a ragged breath and turned to flee, but pivoted over a shoulder. A sob gurgled from her throat. “Go, Gunner. Go see your brother.”
****
Willow heard the faint sound of the front door closing from the refuge of her bedroom and buried her face deeper into the pillow. At least Gunner hadn’t slammed the door. Wasn’t that a good sign?
Preteen giggles floated down the hallway from Tessa’s room, carefree and untouched from the worries of the world. Why couldn’t life stay that way for Tessa forever? Why couldn’t mothers shield their daughters from such unnecessary pain? Why had she asked Gunner for his protection? If she hadn’t asked for his help, he would have settled himself in Serenity Ridge, and she would never have known about Mark’s accident.
Why? Why would Gunner ask Willow to go to the hospital with him? And to take Tessa?
During Tessa’s younger years, Willow had evaded the issue of her daughter’s paternity altogether. But as Tessa grew older and started asking questions, Willow had simply explained that marriage had never been an option between her and Tessa’s father, and that some people, men and women, were not prepared for parenthood. After a few conversations, Tessa had finally accepted that explanation.
Now Gunner was asking her, on a moment’s notice, to divulge all the ugly details from ten years ago. Why? So Tessa could shake hands with her absentee father while likely hooked to all sorts of machines and tubes in a hospital bed! So, Mark, the man who’d vehemently rejected the idea of raising his daughter could become involved in Tessa’s life? Now? When he might be dying? How could she do that to her daughter?
And why would Gunner want her to? Didn’t he want to protect Tessa? Didn’t he understand what he was asking? Couldn’t he realize what meeting a father for the first time, in a normal situation, would do to Tessa? Didn’t he care that Tessa would see the same indifference on Mark’s face as Willow saw on her own father’s face? That Tessa would harbor the same hurt, experience the same pain?
Obviously not. As Tessa’s mother, only she knew what was best for her daughter.
Or should know.
Sitting up on the bed, Willow sniffled and swiped her nose with a tissue. She would wait downstairs for Regi to get back from the exercise room to talk to her. Maybe Regi could help her determine the victor in the battle going on between her foolish heart and stubborn brain.
Because she couldn’t do it.
She only knew one thing.
Gunner had left her.
Again.
****
The crisp bite to the wind as Gunner opened the front door to Mina’s condo reminded him that winter wasn’t far away, even in Florida. He lifted the collar on his leather jacket and pulled it tighter around his neck. Gunner closed the door quietly and hunkered down on the front step.
Regret that he hadn’t made an effort to find his brother earlier kicked him in the gut. Why had he let so many years slip between them?
Frustration at Mina’s lack of trust gnawed at his insides. But then, why would she? Hadn’t he demonstrated to her years ago that he wasn’t worthy of her trust? When he’d walked away from their relationship, leaving her with only a wedding dress and shattered dreams. He hadn’t given her much of an explanation or a backward glance to let her know he still cared. To let her know that he still loved her.
He hadn’t put into words that he’d only been protecting her from the day a uniformed officer might arrive on their doorstep, expressing their condolences at his premature death. How could he tell her that, after the way her mother and brother had died? And how could he look into those beautiful eyes every day and see her disapproval, feel her blame over their deaths? The constant arguments they’d suffer because of his choice of careers.
Oh, yeah. Why should she trust him now? He was still a gun-toting, badge-carrying, protect-his-woman kind of guy. That hadn’t changed. Neither had his love for her.
But he had.
Didn’t she know by now that he wouldn’t leave her like this? He had walked away once. He wasn’t walking away now. Not when it counted with her. Not when she counted on him to protect her most precious gift—her daughter.
But he needed a little space to think, a little time to reflect on what he would do if Mina wouldn’t go to the hospital. Hearing Mina’s muffled cries distracted him. All he wanted to do was pull her against his chest, to soothe away her pain and hurt, to help her see that tomorrow would be brighter. The sun would still shine, the birds would still sing, the trees would still lift their arms toward heaven. That God was still on His throne.
20
“You have to go, Willow.” Regi stood in the center of Willow’s kitchen with hands planted on her slim hips. Decked out in jogging togs, she had just walked in the door from the exercise room, a towel still hanging loosely around her neck. Regi grabbed a bottled water from the refrigerator and sat down at the kitchen table, wiping her face with the towel. “Gunner’s right.”
“You’re actually taking Gunner’s side?” A wheeze of disbelief escaped Willow’s gaping mouth but she couldn’t make herself close it.
How could Regi ditch her emotionally at a time like this? She needed her best friend! Willow stomped to the pantry and yanked a hidden stash of chocolate-covered peanuts from the back shelf. She didn’t even care if Regi saw her hiding place.
Regi took a long swig of water before responding in an even tone. “I’m not taking Gunner’s side, Willow. I’m trying to think this through, all the way through. Past the shock of this particular moment. If you don’t go to see Mark, I think you will regret it. Tessa even more so.”
Willow plunked down in a chair across from Regi and popped a few candies in her mouth. She chewed, staring at her best friend for a moment, barely able to digest the role reversal let alone the nuts. Usually, Willow was the voice of reason. “Okay. Let’s just say we went to the hospital and Mark lives. Then what?”
“Thanks.” Regi accepted a couple of candies from the bag and dropped them in her mouth. After swallowing, she continued. “It’s not all bad, Willow. You would have introduced your daughter to her father. What’s so wrong with that?”
“What’s so wrong with that? Where do I even begin?”
Regi’s lips curved into a gentle smile. “Willow, don’t judge every man out there against your father. There are plenty of good men. Look at my dad and my uncles. Look at Gunner.” With narrowed eyebrows, Regi dared Willow to challenge her words. “It’s obvious Gunner cares about you. And it’s even more obvious that he’s changed. He’s not the same man who walked out on you. Or he wouldn’t be outside waiting for you now.”
Gunner was still here? Why hadn’t he left to go to the hospital?
Willow bolted from the chair and raced to the kitchen window, pinching the blinds apart to peer outside. Where was he? Frustrated, she dropped the slats and turned around. “We’re not talking about Gunner here. We’re talking about Mark. In the hospital. Possibly dying.”
Regi rolled her eyes. “Well, if it were Gunner in the hospital, wouldn’t you go?”
In a heartbeat, but Regi knew that already. “That’s different.”
“How is it different?” Regi cocked her head to the side, studying Willow.
“Gunner and I have history.”
Regi stood. She snatched one of the photos of Tessa from the refrigerator and casually waved it in front of Willow’s face. “Well, I’d say you and Mark have just a smidgen of history, too. And if you really want to be honest with yourself, a huge chunk of the present.”
****
Gunner finished topping off the fluids and lowered the hood on Willow’s car. After cleaning and organizing Mina’s garage, he’d moved on to preventive maintenance on her
car. Mina’s normally structured nature apparently didn’t extend to the garage. Or her vehicle.
He looked around for another constructive task, something to keep his hands and mind occupied, and spotted Tessa’s bike. He pushed down on the seat with steady pressure. Yep, it could use some air.
He grabbed the air pump and the basketball and wheeled the bike outside, relieved that the rain had stopped and the skies had lightened.
The door from the kitchen opened, and Mina poked her head out. She stepped outside and shut the door behind her. Dressed in jeans and a turquoise pullover sweater, she brightened the landscape of the bare garage. Ratcheted his pulse a few notches.
“Gunner, why haven’t you left for Raleigh?”
The red-rimmed eyes and her husky voice stabbed clear through his heart. She moved further outside, wrapping the sweater tighter around her chest.
He bent down to put the needle into the basketball and started pumping. Didn’t dare look at her or he’d reveal the pain leaking from his own eyes. “I’m not leaving you, Mina.”
“Gunner, your family needs you. You need to go be with them.”
“I’m not leaving you or Tessa.” His heart shredded with the words, but he knew he’d made the right choice this time. With every pump, air whooshed into the ball. Sweat beaded on his forehead.
He meant it. He wasn’t leaving them. He’d given her his word that he would protect Tessa until his new job started. After that, he wasn’t sure, but he still had time to come up with a plan if Brugman wasn’t behind bars by then.
Mina huffed and dropped her arms. Within seconds, she’d closed the gap and crouched next to him. Her hand landed on the middle of his back, stilling his arms. “Is it that important to you, Gunner? That we go?”
He turned sideways and placed a palm against her jaw. Her silky curls tickled his skin. “You’re important to me, Mina. You and Tessa. I’m trying to show you that.”
She caught her breath then nodded. “I’ll have Regi take Katie home, then I can explain things to Tessa.” She grimaced. “And call my boss.”
Joy and anxiety collided in his chest. With that single nod, she was giving them a chance to tuck the past firmly behind them. A chance to explore a future together, with Tessa. He prayed that he wouldn’t let either one of them down.
Would he have time to set things straight with his brother? How would Tessa react to meeting her father in a hospital room?
Gunner closed his eyes and prayed. For Mark’s full recovery. For Tessa’s reaction to this news, and for her first meeting with her father. And for Mina. For her heart to be free of bitterness and pain, to be willing and able to reach out and embrace their future.
21
Gunner stepped from the elevator into the Progressive Care Unit of the hospital and glanced around for the sign to the area where his parents waited. In the time it took for them to travel here, Mark’s status had improved enough for him to be moved out of Intensive Care.
He followed the signs and stopped at the entrance to the waiting area. His father sat in an armchair reading a newspaper. A talk show blared on the television. With sagging shoulders and clasped hands, Gunner’s mother stared at it, a blank expression glazing her eyes. A couple of women clustered by the window, talking. An older man played a board game with a girl who looked to be about Tessa’s age.
Gunner sucked in a deep breath, then let it out.
Both parents turned startled looks in his direction.
“Gunner.” His mother sighed the word, as if she despaired of him ever coming.
Only by the grace of God. And Chad’s plane.
“Hi, Mom.” He moved to the couch and pulled his mother into a hug, gave her a kiss on the cheek, then bent over and hugged his father. “Hey, Dad.”
“Son. Glad you could come.”
“How’s he doing?”
“The doctor’s in with him right now. The last status report we heard this morning didn’t give us any real reassurance. Too many internal injuries.” His mother’s husky voice crashed into him like a freight train.
She rubbed her hands together until the skin had to be raw. “But, he improved enough for them to move him out of the Intensive Care Unit. That’s a miracle in itself.”
Gunner sat down on the couch next to her and reached for her hand. He would do anything to erase the worry aging her face. “How long since he’s been awake?”
“He woke early this morning but hasn’t roused much since.” His father folded the newspaper and set it on the side table next to his wife’s purse. He stood, letting out a small groan as he stretched.
“Was he coherent?”
“He was real groggy because of the pain meds. But mostly he’s been out. I’m sure it’s better for him to heal that way.” His dad’s eyes were shadowed, probably from spending all his time in this dimly lit room. When was the last time they were outside?
“Why don’t you guys take a walk while I visit with him? Go to the cafeteria and get some coffee. Or outside for some fresh air.”
His mother’s eyes lit up. She drew back her hand and pushed herself out of the chair. “A little sunlight sounds divine, and I could use a break to stretch my legs. How about we go outside and walk for ten minutes or so, George?”
“That sounds good. Then we’ll grab some coffee on the way back up. Do you want some, Gunner?”
“No, thanks. Let me walk outside to the hallway with you for a minute.” Cupping his mother’s elbow, Gunner led his parents to a secluded niche. Anxiety swamped him as they stared at him with hollow eyes, both sets of shoulders slumping. Would what he was about to tell them send them over the edge? Create more stress? Or help relieve some?
Might as well spill it. All of it.
“I brought Mina with me. Do you remember her?”
His mother’s smile chased away the sadness etching her eyes. “Of course we remember Mina. Are you two seeing each other again?”
Man, he hated to spoil her dreams, rock her world like this right now. But hey, she was about to find out she was a grandma. Didn’t that count for something? “We’re, shall we say, uh, exploring our options. But that’s not what I wanted to tell you.”
The smile faded slightly. “Oh? What is it then?”
“Mina has a nine-year-old daughter. Tessa.”
“Ahh. How sweet.” This, from his mother. Neither said anything else, but he could see the math calculators whizzing.
“She’s not mine.”
Relief showed on both their faces. Ouch. This was going to hurt.
“Tessa is Mark’s child.”
His mother gasped and reached for her husband. His father curled an arm around her, and she pressed into him.
“Mark? That’s preposterous. She loved you.” His father’s voice rumbled and echoed off the tile floor, the accusation clear and unmistaken. Nurses poked their heads from various computer workstations to see what was going on.
His father rubbed his balding head, confusion wrinkling his face. If it was possible, more lines appeared around his mother’s eyes and mouth, her skin turning even more ashen.
Yes, he’d blown it. They hadn’t understood why he’d broken off the engagement then, and this news only made matters worse.
His mother’s lips quivered. She pulled a tissue from her pocket and dabbed her eyes. His father drew her into the refuge of his arms.
“Mark knew about his daughter. I didn’t know if he had told you. I didn’t know about Tessa myself until just a few days ago.”
“No, no. We had no idea. If we did, of course, we would have welcomed her into the family. Why didn’t Mark…or Mina…” A shudder forced his mother’s voice to falter.
“It’s a long story. One best saved for another time. But I thought Mark should at least have the opportunity to see his daughter.”
“It may be too late, son.”
“Let’s hope not.” Gunner frowned, surprised at the accusation in his dad’s voice. He forced out the painful words, trying hard not to
sound disrespectful. But, he would not have either one of them blaming Mina for this. “Not seeing or communicating with Tessa was Mark’s choice. Not Mina’s.”
His mother nodded, a thoughtful expression replacing the pained one from a few seconds ago. “Where are they?”
“Downstairs in the cafeteria. They live in Florida now. All the commercial flights were booked, so Chad came and got us. He’s on protec…uh, keeping them company right now.”
His mother raised a single eyebrow. Her way of disentangling the truth. “Why is Chad protecting Mina and Tessa?”
Leave it to his mother to catch his slip. “Another long story. The abbreviated version is that one of her clients got a little testy after her audit revealed fraud. He was stalking Mina, even tried to snatch Tessa from school. She hired me to protect Tessa until they catch this guy.”
“Oh my word!” His mother covered her open mouth with a hand. “The poor things.”
Things? Gunner figured he’d put this into perspective right now. “My hope is that the proper titles would be future ‘daughter-in-law’ and ‘granddaughter.’”
A loud gasp, and wonder spread across his mother’s face. “Did you hear that, George? A granddaughter! We have a granddaughter!”
His father chuckled. “Well, I’ll be. A ready-made granddaughter. And we don’t even have to change diapers. What do you say we go by the cafeteria and meet our granddaughter, sugar?”
“I’ll race you.” His parents sprinted to the elevator. After mashing the down button, his mother turned around, a twinkle gracing her eyes. “We’ll be back in a few minutes, Gunner. If Mark wakes up, tell him that he’s about to meet his daughter.”
Gunner smiled and stepped back into the waiting area, which was designated as a phone-friendly zone. He unclipped his phone and pushed Mina’s number. “You have two delighted grandparents heading in your direction.”
“What?” Mina screeched. “You told them already?”
“Would you rather I left the ball in your court? Come on, sweetheart. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
Her loud sigh made him wish he was with her and could wrap her in his arms to offer comfort. “Of course not. You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m just a little nervous about the whole thing.”