by J. L. Beck
“So, we’re okay?” Keira whispers, her voice sounding sleepy, and I realize how late it must be.
“More than okay, baby. More than okay.” I kiss her softly, my lips melting against hers. I’m pretty sure I’ll want her this way forever—which scares the hell out of me. In my world, love is a weakness—and weaknesses aren’t something I can afford.
9
Keira
For the first time in days, I wake refreshed. My body feels relaxed instead of tense. I sink into the soft mattress, my eyes opening lazily. Then I realize I’m not in my bed, but Damon’s. His heavy arm is wrapped around my midsection, protecting me like a thick, steel band, holding me to him.
I’ll never admit it aloud, at least not right now, but feeling this close to Damon, feeling his possessiveness, sparks something inside me. Something I don’t really understand. It’s a foreign emotion, but one I want to feel again and again. I let my mind wander to the things he said to me last night. Damon wants to be kind to me—and above all he can be—which tells me he’s not really the twisted asshole he makes himself out to be.
I shift against the mattress, my eyes raking over his chiseled body. We’re still naked. Our bodies molded together perfectly. I consider letting Damon be my first. He’s never truly hurt me—not really—and he won’t let anything happen to me.
His touch was exhilarating, powerful but gentle, and brought me immense pleasure. I nibble on my bottom lip, wondering what kind of pleasure his cock could bring me. He’s been with plenty of women, and the thought disgusts me—but it is what it is. I can’t expect him to have been chaste because I’m a virgin.
A shiver moves through my body as my eyes slide over his perfect V. It’s well defined, and honestly, I’m not sure why Damon is so ripped. Maybe it’s from all the torturing and body burying he does. Or maybe he secretly works out in his free time. Either way, I’m not complaining.
My mouth waters at the tent that starts to form beneath the sheet. I rub my thighs together, feeling wetness seep between my folds. Is this what it feels like to be turned on?
“Are you enjoying the view, baby?” Damon’s deep voice vibrates through me, sending tingles of pleasure straight to my core.
I lift my gaze away from his large cock and find his face. His eyes are still sleepy, but the smile pulling at his full lips makes my heart skip a beat…or five. I nod my head in response to his question, afraid if I speak it will come out as a moan.
Damon’s gaze darkens and his fingers trail over my body. I shiver, and my thighs spread as he moves one of his hands lazily toward my mound.
“Did checking me out turn you on? Or were you just excited to see me this morning?” His lips are at my ear. The hotness of his breath seeps into my skin. And then I feel it, the first brush of his fingers between my legs.
“I…” I stutter, my cheeks heating. I’m not really sure what I want. I want him to touch me—that I know.
“You what?” He presses his lips against my neck, and a whimper rips from deep within my chest.
“I want your fingers on me…inside me,” I whisper, wondering if he even heard me. When Damon speaks again, I swear I can hear the smile on his face.
“Whatever you want, Keira. Whatever you want.” He continues to kiss my throat and collarbone. His kisses are soft, but hold a possessiveness over me. I never thought I’d crave his touch this way, but I do. His fingers ghost against my thigh, then move lower and lower until they’re at my center.
Slowly, he moves his finger against my already wet clit. The breath in my lungs slows as a knot of tension forms deep in my belly. He maintains the same rhythm until my hips start to lift off the bed and he’s forced to move down.
Never removing his finger from my clit, he centers himself between my legs, spreading my thighs wide, before dipping his head closer to where I want it.
“I’m going to taste you, baby. And I want you to come on my tongue. I want to swallow every drop of your sweet cream.”
Damon’s words are crude, but I don’t want him to stop—ever. Moans of pleasure rip through me, my belly tightening as his tongue replaces his fingers. Every lick and suck causes my body to shake with need. I’m at his mercy, and I’ve never been happier in my life. He continues to devour my clit, sucking hard on the little bundle of nerves.
“Oh, Damon…God…” The words rip from my throat in a haste.
An orgasm slams into me so hard, I have to close my eyes and force air into my lungs. My muscles clench hard, my pussy fluttering as if it has its own heartbeat. As I start to fall apart, I feel Damon’s tongue against my pussy. It’s just the tip that slips inside, but it feels amazing as he swirls it around, claiming every drop of my release as his own.
“Mmm, baby, your pussy is delectable. I’m not sure I’ve ever tasted such a sweet pussy before.”
His admission turns me on more, and I don’t understand how that’s even possible. I release the grip I wasn’t even aware I had on the bed sheets, and shift onto my elbows, wanting to see more of him between my legs. It’s such an erotic thing to see a man between my thighs, claiming me, owning a part of me—a part I haven’t even fully explored.
When one of Damon’s thick fingers replaces his tongue, I tense. He lifts his eyes to mine, seeking permission or approval. The browns of my eyes must be completely gone, nearly black, but filled to the brim with desire I’m sure.
“Will it...? If I let you...is that the same as using your…?” I lick my lips and drop my gaze. I can’t even say the damn word—not to him at least. A chuckle erupts from Damon’s throat, and the sound startles me. I look back up at him.
Shaking his head, he keeps his gaze locked on mine. “No, Keira. Fingering you is nothing like me fucking you. You’ll get pleasure from my fingers, yes, but believe me when I tell you, you’ll know when my cock is inside you. And you’ll beg me over and over to keep going until you fall apart.”
I take a moment to relax, trusting his words, knowing when we’re like this, he will never hurt me.
Leaning back, I exhale slowly. “Then please...finger me.”
It’s strange to say that aloud when I’m not completely certain. But I do know that I want this. I want Damon’s touch. I want to feel him inside me.
“At your command, princess.” His words get lost as he presses a kiss to the inside of my thigh, his hands caressing my ass while inching me forward. My heart starts beating out of my chest when I feel one of his thick fingers touch my entrance.
A low growl fills the room as Damon’s finger slips inside me. It’s just the tip, but it’s enough to surprise and excite me all at once.
“Holy fuck, baby, you’re tight as hell.” He remains like this for a long moment. His heavy breathing fills my ears, and I wonder how close he is to losing control.
“Keep going, please.” The words rush from my lips as his finger moves inside me painfully slow. So slow, I almost consider pleading with him to continue moving.
I mewl when his finger slips all the way in. It’s not very wide or long, but it’s definitely something that isn’t usually there, and my body reacts to its presence. My muscles tighten, and a sting follows, but it’s not so much painful as it is uncomfortable.
Just as slow, he pulls it out, then pushes it back in. His groan is audible at the sight of his finger claiming me. I wish I could see his whole face.
I go to prop myself up onto my arms again, but stop. My head falls against the pillows when he places his thumb on my clit, drawing out more moans from my lungs. The dual stimulation intensifies the feelings, and from the tightening in my pussy, it won’t be long before he sends me flying over the edge all over again.
I pant, feeling each slip of his finger in and out of me. His movements are slow and purposeful, and I wonder if it always feels like this—or if it’s just because it’s Damon...if he’s the only man who can make my body sing.
If he’s able to draw this kind of pleasure from me with his fingers and his tongue, what will it be like wh
en he fucks me for the first time? The thought scares and excites me equally. I want him bad, but I’m too terrified of the unknown to give into those needs.
The image of him pushing inside me with his long, hard pulsing dick is what drives me into oblivion.
I cry out, “Damon, Damon. Oh, God. Damon…” when the orgasm hits me full force, and he pushes his finger into me one last time while leaving his thumb on my clit, rubbing small circles against it, drawing out the sensation.
“I can’t imagine what it will be like to claim you for the first time.” Damon’s voice is cloaked in darkness, and I know he’s slightly unhinged.
As he stands, I can see the tension in his body. I want to help alleviate some of that need. I wish I knew exactly what to do on my own, but I need him to direct me.
His cock is hard, impossibly so, and if I’m being honest, it frightens me a little bit—but I don’t let it stop me from reaching out for him.
Damon watches me cautiously, his body seeming to grow tenser as I grip his length. I’ve never held a cock in my hands before, nor brought someone to orgasm, but I want to do that for Damon. I want to make him proud. I want to make him feel the same emotions he makes me feel. My hand seems so small wrapped around him. My fingers don’t even come close to meeting, and I wonder how the hell I’m supposed to do this without using two hands.
“It’s taking everything inside me not to fuck the ever-loving daylights out of you, Keira. If you’re planning to do something with my cock, then please do it. Otherwise, let me go, and I’ll take care of it myself. I won’t be liable for what happens in the next ten seconds.”
His words don’t sound like a threat, but there’s an urgency to them, and I know he means every single word he says. If I don’t do something now, he will disappear somewhere, maybe into the shower, and pleasure himself—pleasure I want to give him.
“I want to do something for you, but I don’t really know how.” My mind briefly wanders to when he taunted me, asking if I wanted his stripper to give me a lesson on how to please him. The memory is painful, and I shut it out as quickly as it entered.
This is just about Damon and me now.
I watch Damon visibly swallow. His body shakes as he lifts his hand, placing it over mine. His grip is harsh but warm, and I enjoy the contact of his skin against mine.
“Let me guide you,” he says, exhaling a harsh breath as he moves his hand with mine over his length. His eyes peer into mine, fire flickering in his gaze, threatening to burn me alive.
His movements are slow at first, as if he’s enjoying the mere contact of my hand against his cock. After a few more strokes, his hand grips mine tighter, and our pace moves together faster. Semen glistens at the edge of his cock, and my pussy quivers at the sight of it.
“Is…?” My voice shakes. “Am I doing it right?” I question, though I’m certain I am based on the sight before me. Damon’s head tips back. His body is on full display, and I take the second to drink every toned inch of him in. He is a beautiful, insanely dark man, but he has a soft side, a side I want to delve into deeper.
“Fuck. Fuck yes, baby, you’re doing all of it right.”
I smile and continue letting him guide my hand, knowing next time I’ll definitely be able to do this on my own. I peer up at him, excitement burning through me. His grip becomes harsh, and my hand starts to throb beneath his. He moves fluidly, and I become mesmerized watching the head of his cock disappear in and out of our joined hands.
“Keira...” he sighs, his body tensing, his chest heaving.
Seconds later, he comes, his seed spilling onto the sheets—well, some gets on our hands. His body shudders with aftershocks, and he relaxes his grip whiles his cock begins to soften in our hands.
I release him and gaze down at the liquid staining the sheets.
Damon grips my chin and forces my eyes to his, then he leans in. His full lips are so close, I can feel the heat of them against my own.
“I might be a fucking asshole. I might do shit that scares you, and even if I don’t mean to, I may hurt you sometimes. I’m not perfect. I’m a sick and twisted man. But one thing will always remain the same—I will not let you go now. If you run, I will catch you. If you hide, I will find you. You cannot escape me. Ever. You fucking belong to me, now and forever.”
His words are possessive, and I want to respond to tell him I agree. But I don’t think he needs to hear me say yes. He already knows how much I need and want him.
His lips crash into mine, sealing his words with a promise.
An unsaid vow. A secret.
And that declaration almost scares me more than seeing him as the monster he claims himself to be.
10
Damon
I can’t take my eyes off her. She wasn’t supposed to mean anything to me, but now she’s wormed her way inside my soul inside my heart. The thought of giving her something I only gave to one other woman in my life scares me.
It terrifies me.
I loved my mother once—before I knew love was nothing more than a weakness. And all she did was turn her head, letting my father abuse my brother and I. She said she loved us. How could she not? Isn’t a mother supposed to love their children by default? No matter what? If that’s so, then love doesn't mean anything—or so I thought.
The scars I bare are almost unnoticeable to the naked eye, but they’re a stark reminder that no one protects you from the monsters in the dark but you. No one cares for you—even if you are weak and can’t care for yourself.
As I peer over at Keira in the passenger seat of my Cadillac, I’m confronted, for the first time in my life, with the idea of loving someone other than myself.
In the past, I had no one to protect me when I couldn't protect myself, but I won’t let Keira suffer the same fate. I know she can’t fight this alone. A battle against my brother is a losing one if she faces him alone. So I promise myself I won’t let her down. I will do everything in my power to protect her. I’ll give her the protection my mother failed to provide me.
When I pull into the parking lot of her old apartment complex, I see Keira’s tiny body tremble.
Doesn’t she know she doesn’t have to be scared with me by her side?
“We’re just going inside to get some of your shit, and we’ll be back out to the car in a flash.” I give her a calming smile, but she doesn’t return one—in fact, she seems to clam up more.
“Is his body still here?” she whispers as I park and kill the engine.
“No. We disposed of it.” My words are harsh, but not untrue. Typically, those who die in this business don’t get a funeral. Leo was no exception.
“Like a bag of garbage? You just tossed him out.” Keira shifts in her seat to face me.
I can’t lie to her—nor would I even if she asked me to. I want her. I want us. And one way or another, she will have to get used to this dark and twisted life.
“Yes, Keira. In this line of work, you don’t get a funeral. They draw too much attention. But don’t feel bad or blame yourself. He knew what he was doing when he signed on for jobs. He knew what his fate looked like.”
Keira’s big brown eyes fill with tears. “I miss him, and I’m scared that when I walk back in there, all the memories will come back to me.”
Her honesty shatters me. She looks like a fragile little doll—fragile enough to break, and I don’t want her broken. I want her whole.
So, I comfort her in the only way I know how—with my touch. Cupping her cheek gently, I bring her face to mine, forcing her to move over the center console.
“You have nothing to fear. You have the devil on your side, and I’m willing to burn down the entire fucking town to keep you safe.” My lips press against hers briefly, and when I feel her tongue probe my lips in an attempt to deepen the kiss, I pull away—even if it’s the last thing I want to do. But as I told her yesterday, I can’t always be the guy she wants me to be. Right now is one of those times. A tearful smile pulls at her lips, and she bl
inks some of them away.
“Let’s get this done and over with, baby. I’ve got shit to do today.”
We make it into the building and up to her floor before her movements start to slow. I hold her hand and tug her along, stopping once we reach the front door. I grip the handle, twisting the knob. That’s strange. I remember telling Toni to lock up the place before he left. I open the door slowly, keeping Keira shielded from anyone who may already be inside the apartment.
“Wait here,” I whisper, releasing her hand and crossing the threshold.
The place reeks of death, and my eyes spot the dark red splotch on the floor where she most likely found her brother. There are smatterings of blood on the walls and couch, and as I move deeper into the apartment, I can see it’s been ransacked.
Fuck, Leo, what did you do to make my brother come after you? And now after your sister? I shake my head and twist on my heel, beckoning Keira forward. She’s still standing in the doorway, looking every bit as afraid as she probably feels. There aren’t any signs of forced entry, and the place looks...well, burglarized—but I’d expect nothing less from my brother.
“Come,” I order, seeing the apprehension in her eyes. She doesn’t want to, but does, her feet moving hastily over the carpet. I let her guide me into her bedroom, and I almost smile. So this is where my sweet little dove would hide from the world?
She goes straight to the closet, pulls out a suitcase, and starts shoving shit in it from the dresser. I don’t think she even knows what she’s taking. She’s just grabbing whatever she can find. The suitcase is almost packed to the brim, and she has trouble closing it without my help. I secretly love watching her struggle, because she’s cute as hell when she’s flustered, but now it’s nothing more than a waste of time. I’m about to give her a hand when I hear it.
The low creak of a door being opened somewhere else in the apartment.
Keira freezes beside me. I bring a finger to my lips, signaling for her to keep her mouth shut. She nods, and I reach around to grab my gun.