Alexis smacked him again. “Pig.”
Todd leaned in and kissed Alexis full on the mouth. “Oink.”
I smiled, but then looked back down at Payton’s last text. “Maybe I should go back and call him?”
Alexis was already shaking her head. “No. You’ve done nothing wrong, Keri. Stay and finish your drink, and then we’ll all go back together.”
“Okay.”
“Good,” Alexis said, and then she picked up her glass. Todd picked his up, too, and before I knew it, we were ordering another. Todd and Alexis were fun people to hang out with.
An hour or so later, we were all back in the room, chilling out in front of the TV and watching Netflix.
“Want some popcorn?” Alexis asked as she stood up from the couch. I was sandwiched in between her and Todd, making sure that the slurping was kept at a bare minimum.
“Yep,” I said, and then looked at Todd; he was already nodding his acknowledgement. “What are we going to watch?”
“I was thinking ‘Chuck’,” Todd stated, and then looked toward Alexis. Alexis nodded, and I did, too.
“Great show.”
“Want to start from episode one, and make it all the way through?” Alexis chimed in from beside the microwave. She was hopping back and forth, shaking her rear to some non-existent music.
I grinned, and looked toward Todd whose eyes were already focused on Alexis’s great ass. “Really, Todd?”
Todd laughed, and Alexis turned around. “What?”
“Todd was checking out your goods,” I said, laughing. Todd shrugged and Alexis grinned.
“Good. He should always check them out.”
I shook my head and then looked down toward my cell. I still hadn’t called Payton. I sighed. “Since I’ve already seen the first episode, I’m going to go out in the hall and call Payton, okay?”
Alexis came back to the couch with the popcorn freshly popped, and the smell was amazing. I inhaled once, and then stuck my hand in the bowl and pulled out a handful of kernels. “This looks so good.”
“Don’t be too long, okay?” Alexis said with a worried glance.
“I won’t. I just want him to know that I’m going to make it home for Christmas, and alleviate all of those Payton worries he has up in his noggin. You know how he is.”
Alexis nodded. “Yeah, he’s got it bad.”
I smiled softly. I knew what she was talking about, but wasn’t sure if it was as serious as she and Todd were. They were in the ‘everything is wonderful’ faze… Payton and I were in the ‘wtf’ stage. Everything was questioned, everything was passionate—but to a point, and everything was uber complicated. Too complicated. Life should never be this complicated. That’s the stage we were in.
“Yeah,” is the only thing I said before walking out into the hall, leaving the two lovebirds on the couch to their slurping.
I pulled up Payton’s number quickly and pushed send. He picked up on the first ring.
“Where have you been?” he asked, sounding worried.
I sighed. “I told you. I was at Woody’s Tavern with Alexis and Todd. We were just celebrating my new job.”
Payton didn’t say anything for a few seconds and then blew out a deep breath. “I know…I’m just…I was worried. That campus doesn’t seem the safest.”
I smiled. It wasn’t the safest university in the world, but it wasn’t the worst either. “I was perfectly fine. I was with a group of people.”
“Yeah.”
“So, how was your day?” I asked, hoping to get the subject firmly off of me.
“It was okay. Dad’s got me doing doubles. I don’t mind though. It keeps my mind off of things.”
“Things?”
“You,” Payton replied.
“Oh.” I didn’t mean to sound defeated, but I did. Completely.
“I worry about you all the time, and working helps me to concentrate on something else other than that,” Payton said, trying to ease my saddened tone.
“There’s nothing to worry about, Pay. It’s just the same old me,” I said, only it wasn’t. I wasn’t the same. I was without a father, with a boyfriend for the first time in my life, and I wanted to experience things, have adventures, stories to tell my grandkids one day. And, I was worried about my mom.
“You keep saying that, but I don’t quite believe you,” Payton admitted. “I know there’s something wrong.”
“Oh, and where did you get that idea?” I asked, my tone saying that I was a little miffed.
“It’s in everything you do. When we were back at the treehouse—”
“Back to that,” I interrupted, “again?”
Payton sighed. “You knew what I meant when I said what I did, and you got all bent out of shape. You were ready to just be done with me.”
“Well, it was an asshole thing to say, Payton.”
“I don’t want to fight,” Payton finally said, and I stewed.
“Oh really? So that’s why you texted me ‘fine’?”
“I know. I shouldn’t have said—”
“No you shouldn’t have. You don’t trust me at all, do you?”
Payton sighed once again. “It’s not that, Keri. I just…you’re a long way away from me, and we’re not going to see each other until Christmas, and you make these decisions without me.”
“What decisions?” I asked, fuming.
“The part about you not coming for Christmas.”
“I told you I was coming for Christmas!” I yelled, and the door to my dorm opened. Alexis looked worried.
“You okay?” she asked.
I nodded. She closed the door.
“I know, you did today, but…you weren’t going to and you didn’t even ask how I’d feel about that,” Payton said quietly.
“I guess I didn’t think it was your decision, Payton. I’m not rich, and neither is my mom. I won’t always be able to come home for every little thing.”
“So I’m just a ‘little thing’ now?” Payton fumed.
“You’re ridiculous is what you are. You’re petty, and controlling, and…and…”
“Do you love me, Keri?”
My heart was beating fast now, and by the sound of Payton’s last question, and the way he said it, I felt sad. I wasn’t sure what I loved. Payton was my best friend. Sure I loved him. But…
“I guess that answers my question,” Payton said. I heard him sniff, which meant he was either crying or he was ready to. I started to panic.
“Don’t…”
“It’s fine, you know? Let’s just…I don’t know, slow down things. You’re over there and I’m here. You have a long time until you’re done with school.”
Payton sounded completely defeated. I felt a weight off my chest, and a sadness from breaking his heart. “I’m sorry, Pay. I think that’s a good idea.” I wrapped my arms around my body and held the cell up to my ear with my shoulder. “This has been way too complicated. Life should never be this complicated.”
Payton cleared his throat. “Yeah. It’s…we’re still friends, right?”
I nodded, and a few tears escaped my eyes. “Ye…yeah, best friends.”
Payton laughed gruffly. “This is going to suck for me.”
I blew out a breath and leaned my head against the wall and slumped down to the floor. “Yeah.” It was going to suck for me, too.
“I’ll see you at Christmas still, right?” Payton asked softly.
“Yeah, I’ll be there.”
“Okay. Well, I lo…I’ll see you then. Take care.”
I swallowed, feeling my throat clog. He was going to tell me he loved me, and then backed off. “We’ll email, right?”
“Yeah, that’s…that’s fine. Yeah.”
I didn’t want to lose the friendship that we built, but I also knew it wasn’t fair to him. “Good. Have a good night.”
I heard the dial tone and realized that Payton didn’t wish me a good night, he didn’t even say goodbye; he must have hated me. I hated myself. I got up from the fl
oor, and put my hand on the doorknob and opened it up to Alexis, who wrapped her arms around me and squeezed.
“You okay?”
I nodded. “Yeah, we just broke up.”
“I know, I was listening,” she said, not caring that she had listened in on a rather personal conversation.
I laughed softly and started to cry. “I broke his heart today.”
“You’ll see him at Christmas. Maybe by then, you’ll know what you want.”
“Maybe,” I mumbled. “It’s not that I don’t know what I want, it’s just…everything feels so ill-timed. I’m still getting over my father’s death, getting over the fact that Payton loves me, and that we are no longer best friends, but could be something bigger. That’s not something easy to just work out. And, not only that, I’m worried about my mom. She’s all alone in the house.”
“I know…”
“I’m…overwhelmed I guess.”
“You need to take care of yourself before you can take care of others, Keri. Figure out what you want, and then you can work out all the other issues.”
Alexis always seemed to make sense. I wiped at my eyes, and saw Todd on the couch, holding the popcorn bowl in his lap. He looked at me and smiled.
“You okay?”
“Yeah,” I said and nodded.
“Come sit down and watch this show with me. It’s exactly what you need.”
“And what’s that?”
“Laughter, guns, shooting, nerdy guys that never get the girl, and of course you can’t discount the whole spy angle.”
I smiled. “Thanks, Todd.”
“You’re welcome. We didn’t want to start the show without you. We didn’t even make out while you were in the hall.”
I quirked my eyebrow and Todd shook his head. “Nope, nothing.”
“I was too busy listening at the door,” Alexis admitted. “I’m a good friend.”
“Yeah, you kind of are,” I admitted.
“Everything will work out the way it’s meant to.” Alexis looked at Todd and nodded, and he pushed play. We sat on the couch and watched ‘Chuck’, ate popcorn, and had some Cokes until Netflix asked us if we were still watching the same program. At that, we all laughed and2 decided that it was time to turn off the TV. School would come early, and then after—work. We all had jobs now, and would be tired if we didn’t get enough sleep.
Before closing my eyes, however, I looked down at my phone, noticing I had a missed message from Payton.
*Kings to you, Fernan. *
My bottom lip trembled, and I turned toward the wall and cried. Payton talked in movie quotes often, and he’d just let me know via The Count of Monte Cristo that the ball was now in my court, and even though I thought the breakup was a good idea, in my heart I was crushed. The thought of Payton moving on was heartbreaking.
Chapter Four
*Get to Work!*
Payton
I lay back in the pile of sleeping bags and cried. Like a little bitch.
Keri.
She didn’t want me anymore, and she hadn’t replied to my text. It wasn’t surprising, as she probably didn’t know what to say. I told her that the ball was in her court, that she was in charge of our destiny. I put her in charge of our turnout. I was screwed, and I knew it.
Keri, the girl that didn’t even get how deep my feelings ran for her. Keri, the girl who sat up here nearly every day of my teenage life and didn’t realize that I pined for her. I left her in charge of our fate.
Great.
Good work, Payton. Smooth.
I looked up at the ceiling, staring at the stupid glow in the dark stars that Keri and I put up years ago. We used to lay back in these sleeping bags and talk about our futures. I always pictured her with me, she always pictured rows and rows of books and maybe a family someday. I’d always dreamed of being hers.
I was a total dickhead.
I looked down at my cell phone, hoping to see a text from her, but saw nothing.
What the hell was I going to do now?
My phone rang.
I closed my eyes, wiped some of the tears away with the back of my hand and hurriedly answered.
“Keri, I knew you’d…”
“It’s your dad, Payton. You need to finish your chores.”
I blew out a hard breath and tried to talk, but nothing came.
“Payton,” Dad said, sternly, “are you listening?”
“Ye…yes, sir.”
“What the hell are you doing out in that tree house again? You’re supposed to be brushing down the horses.”
“I…Keri…”
“Son, you need to finish your chores here before you get personal time. Now I’ve put up with a…”
“I’m on my way to the barn now, Dad. It won’t happen again.”
Dad didn’t say anything for several seconds and then cleared his throat.
“You okay?”
“Fine.”
There, I used the girly word I used earlier on Keri. Fine. It spoke volumes. Dad knew what it meant. He’d been married for years after all.
“You don’t…”
“Dad, you don’t want to know what’s going on with me, and I don’t want to talk about it. I won’t be late on my chores again. Let’s just leave it at that.”
“If you want to…”
“I don’t. I’m leaving the fort now.”
I hung up the phone, cutting off any further questions. I didn’t want to talk about Keri. I didn’t want to talk about anything. Life sucked.
***
Keri
I walked into the library about thirty minutes before my shift and met with Mrs. Fletchman. She was pretty, around fifty or so, with dark brown hair and green eyes. She wore stoner-type clothing—things from the 70s that looked surprisingly fashionable on someone of her age, and she smiled a lot. I liked her right away.
“So, here’s where you get the books and then you look at these numbers here,” she said, pointing to a cart, and then to the spine of one of the larger books, “and this means the shelf number, and this letter here is the genre, and then this letter tells you the first letter of the last name of the author.”
I looked at the spine and hoped that I’d remember what she was talking about. Shelving library books was surprisingly harder than I thought it would be.
“Okay, so these are all checked in?” I asked.
Mrs. Fletchman nodded. “Yes. Tina, she’s the girl with the red hair, she will check these books in, and then put them on this cart and will put the cart here. If you see the cart anywhere but here, don’t touch it.”
“Okay.”
So, it wasn’t rocket science, but it was eight dollars an hour more than I had been making.
“So, before I forget, you’ll be working with Jessop.”
“Who’s that?” I asked, looking around, and then saw a boy walk toward the two of us.
“Him,” Mrs. Fletchman said, and then grinned. “Jessop, this is Keri; Keri, Jessop. Jessop is a grad student in library science, and he’s been with us for a while now. You two will be working side by side, not only shelving, but helping me reorganize the new wing of the library.”
Jessop was…hot.
I swallowed. Jessop, grad student, Jessop, black framed glasses, Jessop with dark thick hair, and beautiful full lips.
I looked at him and tried to smile, but ended up just staring. This was so not what I needed right now.
“Hi, Keri,” Jessop said and his face reddened.
Add absolutely adorable to Jessop’s already stellar attributes.
“Hi,” I said, and then put my hand out, “nice to meet you.”
Jessop took my hand and I felt a zing.
Shit. Not the zing.
Jessop smiled, and Mrs. Fletchman cleared her throat. “Okay, well now that the introductions are out of the way, Keri, I need you both to get started on the new wing. You two will be redoing the children’s section. Our last employee, Carl, really screwed things up.”
At the mention of Carl’s name, Jessop shook his head and groaned.
“Carl was a moron; he didn’t pay attention to the whole spine number. He basically put everything in the wrong order.”
Panic set in and I swallowed. I wasn’t sure I paid too much attention to the order of the spine either, and my face must have reflected my thoughts because Jessop’s lip quirked up in a cute little smirk.
“Don’t worry, I know what I’m doing. I’ll make sure you don’t put anything in the wrong order.”
I sighed, and Mrs. Fletchman smiled. “You’re in good hands, Keri. See you in a few hours. Keri, let Jessop know if you have any questions. Good luck.”
Mrs. Fletchman walked away and left me with Jessop, the male version of a sexy librarian. I was in big trouble.
Jessop turned toward me and grinned. “So, first job?”
I nodded. “It shows? I guess I really am in trouble.”
Jessop laughed. “Nah, you just have that scared look about you. You’ll be fine. Carl really was a moron. He’s also going to college for ‘girl’ reasons.”
“Girl reasons?”
“Yeah, he’s never had one, and thinks he’ll find a girl here.”
“And you don’t think that will work?” I asked.
Jessop tilted his head to the right and then quickly shook it. “No, I really don’t. Carl is what you’d call a required taste. He’s about ¼ redneck, ¼ idiot, and about ½ on the dirty side. He doesn’t have a lot of finesse either, and from what Gloria tells me, that accounts for a lot of it.”
“Who’s Gloria?” I asked, and followed Jessop toward a stack of books. Jessop picked up one and looked it over and then grabbed hold of the cart where they were sitting and started to push it toward a shelved area across the room.
“Gloria’s my girlfriend. She used to work here, too. She got fired, and Carl took her place, and now you.”
“Fired?”
“Yeah,” Jessop said, and then frowned. “She was always late coming in. She has classes on the other side of the University. That, and I think she was sleeping in, but she won’t admit to that.”
“Oh,” I said, and then nodded. “I bet you’re sad to see her go.” I don’t know why I said that. I felt dumb and my face reddened.
“I am, but she wasn’t very good at this job either. It’s pretty boring if you aren’t a fan of literature. She only got the job so we could be together, and she complained about it most days, so… really it’s a good thing. She’s a fashion design major.”
The Boy I Love (Falling for You #2) Page 3