Pain fills her eyes and her lips go tight fighting the emotions overcoming her as she replies, “We have to ignore it.” Breaking free of my hand, she gives me one last, heart wrenching glance before she races from the room.
What the fuck!
Without another thought, I grab my jacket and storm out the door just missing Ramon, who looks surprised before I ignore him and walk out onto the back porch to try and catch my breath. Resting my arms on the porch railing, I breathe deeply as I hear the door open behind me.
“I’m not going to ask what that was about, but we’re heading out so I’ll catch you later,” Ramon says to my back.
I glance over my shoulder and meet his worried eyes, “Okay.”
He doesn’t move and continues watching me. “Are you okay?”
“I will be.”
Chapter 9
Carla
Ramon has been acting weird ever since we left his parents’ house. Usually we’d talk or listen to music, but neither of these things took place on the way home tonight. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he’s sulking.
Why he’d be sulking was anyone’s guess because the day has been good and I thoroughly enjoyed the time with the women when Lily was opening her ‘naughty’ presents, which the guys couldn’t stop looking at. Ramon seemed to enjoy being with his family, but at the end, as we were leaving he seemed in a funk and hasn’t snapped out of it now that we’re home.
Even now, I can hear him slamming around in the kitchen. Loud thumps as he closes cupboards, bangs as he sets things down on the counter top and crashes as he moves around the room. I wince with each noise, a headache slowly building. Okay, enough is enough.
Walking out of my room and towards the kitchen, I stand in the doorway and watch him as he slams around the kitchen. It takes a few minutes before he sees me. He stops and stares at me with what I’d call a guilty look on his face.
“What’s happened Ramon? You were fine at your parents’ house. Have I done something?”
He looks away and won’t make eye contact with me before turning his back and leaning against the counter. “What’s going on between you and my brother?”
I’m stunned. I shouldn’t be, but I am. That was the last thing I expected him to ask me. “I don’t know what to say.” Taking a seat at the breakfast bar to the side of me, I rest my elbows on the counter top with my face in my hands.
Before I even realize it, Ramon is standing in front of me and peeling my hands away from my face. As I look at him leaning over the breakfast bar towards me, he doesn’t look angry, he looks…resigned.
“Carla…I’m not angry with you. I am with Seb, but not you. You know this thing between us, which we’re showing to the world, isn’t happening, but he doesn’t and he’s coming on to you as my girlfriend and I’m not sure how I’m supposed to feel.”
He sighs and rubs the back of his neck in agitation. “Sebastian is my brother and if I thought he was looking at you as the next notch on his bed post then I’d be pissed as hell, but he isn’t. He says he hasn’t been with anyone for five months, which was when he first met you, and I believe him.” He grins. “You have my brother tied in knots…I was debating letting him know we’re just friends to put him out of his misery, but I think he needs to suffer some more for poaching what he believes to be mine.”
Unbelievable, I sigh inwardly. There isn’t any jealousy, just simply sibling rivalry. “You wouldn’t hold me to my promise to act as your girlfriend? Why? You told me that you needed me to pretend for twelve months. Why the change of heart?”
My mind is whirling with panic at the thought of not being his ‘pretend’ girlfriend anymore. Will he ask me to leave? Surely he won’t. He knows I have nowhere else to go.
“Carla, please calm down.” His gaze searches my face and softens with reassurance. “No matter what happens about our agreement this is your home for as long as you want it to be, okay? The only way you will leave is if you want to, not because I’ve asked you to. That will never happen.” He pauses. “So there is something between you and Sebastian?” He raises an eyebrow.
A heated blush fills my cheeks and for a moment, I think of lying to Ramon, but we’ve never lied to each other. Finally I say, “He makes me feel things I’ve never felt before. He frightens me with what he makes me feel. We haven’t exchanged bodily fluids – yet, but I’m frightened if I keep seeing him we will and I don’t know what to do about it.”
I turn into Ramon and stare into his eyes to show him that I’m committed to my promises. “I promised you I would see the twelve months out, but it’s getting harder every time I see him. I know he’s struggling as well because you’re his brother and he feels like he’s betraying you.” I swipe at a loose tear as it runs down my cheek, which Ramon follows with his eyes.
“I’m sorry Carla. I had no idea any of this would happen when I asked you to help me out,” he apologizes as he takes the seat next to me and starts to rub my back in a soothing motion.
“Can I ask you a question and get an honest to god’s answer?” I watch him closely for his reaction while I sit up and secure my hair into a band at the back of my head. I could do with a shower as well, but that will have to wait.
“I guess,” he agrees on a sigh as he watches me nervously.
“Why did you want me to act as your–” I raise my hand to keep him quiet as he opens his mouth, “girlfriend? At the time I thought it was to explain your reason for me living with you and also to protect me if Gary showed up to finish what he started in Canada, but every now and again I get the feeling there’s something you’re not telling me.”
His hands slip from my back where they have stopped their comforting circle. Instead, they move to his neck where he uses both hands to rub at it, a sign that he’s uncomfortable. “My parents.”
He lets out a heavy sigh then laughs before looking back at me. “Or rather my Mom. She wants all her sons married and to supply her with grandbabies. She’s been even worse since Michael and Lily tied the knot. It’s not that easy for me. My life isn’t really what my parents would want for me or rather my choice in life partner.”
Life partner? Life partner? Is he admitting to what I’ve suspected all along?
How do I ask? Because I think I need it spelling out to me.
“Um, Ramon,” God this is difficult, “Noah’s gay,” I blurt out to a stunned Ramon who after a minute starts laughing. “Are you?” Well, that shuts him up.
“Fuck. Yeah,” he whispers so seriously. “You might as well know, I’m gay,” Ramon chokes out, leaving the kitchen and moving into the attached living room. He collapses on to the sofa.
I watch Ramon for a few minutes then slip from the stool and walk over to him, taking the seat beside him. I rest my head on his shoulder as he wraps his arm around me and pulls me into him.
Cuddling against his chest, I ask, “Why can’t you tell them Ramon? They’re your family and love you. It might take a short while, but they’ll come around.” I squeeze his waist in reassurance, “You may have to put up with your brothers being an ass, but at the end of the day, you’re from a close-knit family and whatever happens with your announcement everything will work out with them eventually. You must know that?”
He kisses me on the head. “It isn’t that easy. I’m a grown man and kept it from them for years, since I was nineteen. So for eleven years, I’ve been lying to my family.”
I push myself up slightly from his chest to meet his eyes. “Ramon, you haven’t really lied. All you’ve done is kept it to yourself. Wait a minute. I’ve seen you with Sylvia. Whenever she walks in a room your whole body reacts…and don’t tell me otherwise because I’ve seen you on more than one occasion.”
Ramon pulls me back down to him before he answers. “You’re right. I’m not sure what’s going on with her. I feel a connection, but it scares the shit out of me. I’ve never been in a relationship with a woman and I’m not sure I’m capable of being in one. I’ve been with women, mor
e than I care to admit, usually with another guy present,” he says with a shaky laugh. “Shit, I can’t believe I’ve just admitted that to you.”
“It was probably easier than you thought it would be considering I know what you and Noah used to get up to.”
“Yeah, he told me he talked to you about everything, although he did say you had no idea he was bisexual.”
I chuckle into his chest. “I wasn’t born yesterday and read between the lines. I spent more time wondering than I did actually knowing though…I won’t say anything to anyone Ramon, that’s for you when you’re ready.”
“God, I’m not sure if I’ll ever be ready for that.”
“Ramon?”
With my head still resting on his chest I look up and meet his eyes. “You’re not one hundred percent gay, are you? You’re just as bisexual as my brother, which may be easier for your brothers to accept.”
He lets a breath whoosh out as he rests his head on the back of the sofa while running his fingers through my ponytail.
Ramon is a hot guy, but I’ve only ever looked at him as a brother. Oh, once or twice before I cottoned on to his preferences, I might have given him more than a passing thought, but that hadn’t lasted long.
“Carla, I’m not sure what to do about Seb. To explain there’s nothing between us might cause more problems than it would solve, but at the same time I can see how torn you both are.” He strokes through my ponytail. “I can see the questions in your eyes…I saw you leave the coatroom a few minutes before Sebastian did. I followed him outside and watched him for a few minutes before opening the porch door and checking if he was okay. He left without coming back inside, which he’s never done before. And you looked upset.”
“Oh boy.” Sitting up, I remove my shoes and say, “Let’s just see what happens over the next week or two before making any decision about our so called relationship, okay. Nothing is going to happen overnight.”
“You’re right.”
Standing up, I glance down at him and smirk. “As usual.” I smile. “I’m going to go and shower before I climb into bed and finish the book I’m reading so I’ll see you in the morning.”
Chapter 10
Sebastian
Nearly a week ago I was in the small room my parents call a coatroom with the woman who has become an obsession of mine. Carla, who is sleeping with my brother, is slowly killing me.
Sitting in my brother’s chair, that of a CEO, I look out over the Lexington skyline craving someone I can never really be with.
My every waking moment is full of her. I see her smile. I remember how she quivered against me when I held her. I also remember the look of lust in her eyes the last time she looked at me before leaving me alone in the room.
I glance in my lap at my dick, which is hard as fuck in my pants with thoughts of Carla. This is nothing new considering every time I think about her I end up with a bad case of blue balls unless I use my fist. Reaching down with my hand, I rearrange my throbbing shaft and turn back to the desk to deal with the problems on the construction site, which is just outside of town. Problems I wish Michael was here to deal with.
I keep telling myself this is only temporary. I hate being in the office everyday because I much prefer to be out of the office and working the building sites most days, but I guess until everything settles down after Lily has the twins I’m going to be stuck here full-time.
“Sebastian?”
Ugh, Jacky. I hadn’t heard the office door open. I really need to get my head back in the game.
“Is there a problem?” I try my best to keep my eyes above her chest. She has some rack, which my brothers love going on about. Even though I’m so tied up about Carla, I’m still human and still a hot-blooded guy.
She walks towards the desk before bending over to place some papers in front of me.
My eyes nearly bulge out of my head at the site of her tits about to pop right out of whatever she’s wearing. I quickly meet her eyes and realize I reacted exactly like she wanted me to.
“I just need you to sign,” she walks around to my side of the desk and leans into me, “here and here.”
Without looking at her, but unable to concentrate with her standing practically naked next to me, I start to read through the letters before signing them.
Passing them back to her, I watch her smile then saunter across the office with an extra sway in her step. God, if her dress was any shorter she’d be showing her ass.
As she opens the door Ruben walks in, stopping to give her a once over. “Looking good, Jacky. Hope my brother’s looking after you.” He starts laughing after glances at me before ushering Jacky the rest of the way through the door.
He whistles before turning back to me. “She’s one mighty fine woman and those breasts,” he says licking his lips.
“Fuck, will you do something about her. You’re more diplomatic than me. Tell her we have a dress code or something.”
Ruben roars with laughter. “You know after the shit morning I’ve had, I didn’t think there was anything that could cheer me up.” He points his finger at me. “You, my brother, have.”
I grunt and try to ignore him. “What happened this morning?”
He runs his fingers through his hair, which is a McKenzie habit, before letting out a tired sigh. “Someone broke into Kenza again during the night. The fuckin’ bastards trashed the back storeroom and nothing else. I can’t decide whether they’re after something in particular, and if they are, I haven’t a clue what. Or if they just want to cause trouble.”
I sigh and glance out of the big windows as I try to bring my thoughts together. Kenza has been having trouble for a while now, which is damn frustrating. If we can pin point where the trouble is coming from then it can be stopped, but right now we’re blind.
“Tell me what you need.” Sitting back in my chair, I watch my brother try to get his emotions under control. Ruben has always found it difficult to accept help from anyone, but I know this is more serious than anything he’s had to face before. He has no choice but to accept help from family.
“I hate this. Asking for help.”
Before answering, I sit back and rest my right ankle on my left knee. “We’re brothers Ruben, if you can’t ask your brother for help when you need it then there’s something wrong.”
“I know, and yeah I’ll call you when I need you there.”
Hearing him agree to call me tells me this really is more serious and is something that he can’t handle alone. A part of me feel’s relieved he’s accepted my help without much persuasion. It’s also a conversation I need to have with all my brothers to make sure everyone knows what’s going on because I’d bet he hasn’t told anyone else.
“You need to get laid,” Ruben informs me.
I look at him startled with the abrupt change of subject. “How’d you get that out of calling me when you need me? Fuck, are you serious?”
“You admitted to having a dry spell and you need to break it then you’ll be relaxed again. Not sure I like you uptight, besides what about Jacky? She’s yours for the taking.”
I know what he’s doing and I just wish he came up with a different subject. Yeah, I’m frustrated as hell, but Jacky – hell no.
Hearing a knock on the door, we both sit up straight in our chairs as Jacky comes strutting into the room in her black high heels clutching some more papers in her hand.
Hell, it’s no wonder I never get much work done here with her back and forth every two damn minutes.
As she passes Ruben, I avoid eye contact with him, but not before I see him smirk with his eyes fixed on her ass.
Clearing his throat, we both look at him. “You know Jacky,” Ruben quickly meets my eyes before looking away, “you should get Sebastian to bring you down to my club tonight. There’s a live band on, ‘Deception’, they’re good and going places.”
Fuck, thanks brother!
Glaring at my traitor of a brother, I grind my teeth together as he stands up and mak
es a quick dash to the door.
“See you both tonight,” Ruben says before closing the door on his way out.
If I take Jacky with me tonight she’ll get the wrong idea, but how the fuck do I get out of this crap my brother’s dropped me in?
While my brains engaged elsewhere, Jacky sits in the chair Ruben just vacated. “It’s okay Sebastian. I know you’re not interested in me so don’t worry about taking me anywhere. I know your brother dropped it on you.”
She’s crying. Why me? Standing I walk around the desk and crouch in front of Jacky, offering her a tissue. “Jacky, you’re a nice young woman.” I pause. “It’s just that I’m not really looking for a relationship right now.”
Perhaps if I take her, it will take my mind off Carla, who I can never be with. I need to move on. Have I got it in me to move on right now though? What the hell. “Jacky you know what? Let’s go to Kenza tonight and have a damn good time.”
Her tears miraculously disappear. “You mean that? You’re seriously going to take me out on a date?”
Standing, I back up and sit on my desk. “Yes,” I whisper, wondering what the hell I’m doing. I need a distraction, but I’m not sure Jacky is the kind of distraction I need or want.
Damn Ruben!
Chapter 11
Carla
Trying to get the spreadsheet data together for Ramon is easier said than done when my mind keeps wandering to Sebastian. I haven’t seen him for close to a week, which is normal, but after the embrace we shared, my longing to be back in his arms is tenfold.
No one has ever made me feel the way Sebastian does. With just one look, my panties are wet and my core throbs to be filled by him.
Having told Ramon to leave things for a few weeks to see how everything goes was stupid of me. Instead, I could be with Sebastian right now, seeing where the thing between us goes. I have the feeling that once I get with Sebastian he won’t let me go. I’ve seen the possessive look on his face when he thinks no one is watching and just knowing he’s kept his zipper up since we met does things to my insides.
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