by Marie Harte
“Yeah. You scare me now. Say yes, honey. I love you. My family loves you. Even my mother loves you.”
“Let’s not get carried away.”
“Well, okay.” He laughed. “But honestly, she was worried for me, not against you. There’s a difference.”
“If you say so.”
“Here.” He handed her his cell phone, having anticipated the problem.
“What’s this?”
“A message for you.”
She read it and gaped. “Is this for real?”
“Read it out loud.” He nodded.
She stared down at it. “‘Del. I’m sorry for behaving abominably toward you, but I worry about my boy. Mike has a stubborn streak like his father.’” She stopped and glanced at him. “Like his father?”
“Read on.”
“It stopped there.”
“Hell, next message. Read that.”
She scrolled down. “Oh. Ahem. ‘I want him to be happy, and you make him so happy, Del. Please ignore a cranky old woman. Give him a chance. He puts the toilet seat down and doesn’t move his lips when he reads.’” Del started laughing so hard she cried.
But these tears made him happy. “You finished?”
“Wait.” She finally stopped laughing. “Okay, she’s funny. Where was I? Hmm…‘when he reads…and he told me he loves you.’” She stared at him. “When was this?”
“When she and I had that argument two weeks ago.”
“Really?”
“Really.” He tried to take the phone back.
“Wait. There’s one more part. ‘Welcome to the family, Del. We’d be proud to have you’.” Del cleared her throat. “Oh my gosh. That was the best text message ever.” She narrowed her eyes. “Are you sure you didn’t write that from your mother?”
“You’ll see this weekend when you come to your own engagement party. Now you have to say yes. I can’t take back all the food my mom bought. Oh, and about Grace…”
“You’re not convincing me to say yes.”
“I was thinking maybe you could give her Mitch’s card. He is a single attorney, and she’s a single paralegal.”
“How do you know he’s an attorney?”
“Rena gave me an earful.” He had no problem diming out her cousin. She’d outted him as Mr. Sexy. She deserved to be thrown under the bus.
“You know, that’s not a bad idea.”
“Exactly. Don’t worry about Grace anymore, Delilah. Only one woman can handle my monster cock. And we both know that’s you.”
Lara returned with their food and overheard that last bit. “Oh wow. Monster cock, hmm? Don’t suppose you’d be willing to show us? Consider it my tip.”
Del growled, “Here’s a tip. My fiancé isn’t showing anything to anyone but me for the next eighty years,” she shouted to the bar.
Lara set down the food and clapped, along with everyone close by. “Hey, everyone. Del got herself engaged to the guy who decked Jim and scared John!”
“John?” Del frowned at him.
“Ah, does he look like Mr. Clean?”
She blinked. “Actually, yeah. Something you want to tell me, MC?”
“Later. If my truck’s not in the lot in one piece when we leave, I’ll visit John again, and this time we’ll really talk.”
“Talk, hmm? The way you ‘talked’ to Jim?”
“More or less. I went easy on Jim.”
“Oh. Now I’m all tingly.”
He grinned. “What say we skip this place and let you handle my M.C.?”
“You’re on, McCauley. Let’s go home.”
Chapter 23
Colin raced around his grandparents’ backyard. They had the best parties. Hyde followed him with Jekyll. Since Abby had told him the story of how she’d named hers and Ubie’s dog, he’d decided on Jekyll for his puppy. And it totally fit, because Jekyll liked to play with Hyde as much as Colin liked to play with Hyde.
“Dog is going to be big,” Uncle Flynn said and bent down to pet him. “Look at those paws, Maddie.”
Maddie scrunched up her nose. “He seems to have a fetish for licking my feet, just like Hyde.”
“We all do, sweet thing.”
She laughed at Uncle Flynn, who made little sense, and Colin continued through the crowd, leading Jekyll and Hyde. Searching for Brian, he bumped into Ubie and Abby standing with Uncle Cam and Vanessa. They were arguing about Abby getting a tattoo. Vanessa and Uncle Cam were against it, but Abby and Ubie wanted her to get it.
“Come on, guys,” Ubie said with his most charming grin. “A little honeypot right…there.”
Colin frowned, not sure what “there” meant.
“Brody, really.” Abby turned pink, so Colin knew his uncle was saying stuff he wasn’t supposed to hear. “Oh, Colin. Hi.” She leaned down to pet Hyde, who cozied up to her.
Not to be ignored, Jekyll yipped and pawed at her leg.
“He is so cute. He almost looks like Hyde’s baby boy.”
“Oh man, that dog is gonna be huge. And ugly,” Vanessa said in a low voice.
“Hey.” Colin frowned at her. “Jekyll’s not ugly.”
“Of course not,” Uncle Cam agreed. Behind Vanessa, he mouthed, “Ignore her. Pregnant lady,” and made the sign of a bump over his belly.
“Oh. Um, sorry.” He’d once overheard Dad talking about how pregnant ladies could get scary, and Vanessa was scary to begin with. Time to find Brian, and fast.
“What did you say?” he heard Vanessa ask Uncle Cam, but Colin was on the move.
He found Del and his grandma and hid behind a bush. Del seemed a little afraid of Grandma, even though Dad had told her it would be okay. Sometimes Grandma could be bossy, and Del could be bossy, so he wondered who would win in a cage match. Then he wondered if Del had tights, and if she’d mind if he entered her in that drawing on TV to join that reality wrestling show. Brian would probably have an idea how to make that happen.
“Your text meant a lot to me, Beth,” Del said in a quiet voice.
“Oh honey. I’m only sorry I had to say it with letters instead of in person.” To Colin’s shock, Grandma hugged Del. “You’re more than a part of this family. You saved Colin for one.” Grandma wiped away tears. Gah. Girls. Always crying. Then Del blinked a lot, and he worried, because his eyes felt funny too. She really had saved him. “More than that, you saved Mike. He loves you so much, you know.”
“I do.” Del smiled. “But not as much as I love him and the kid trying to hide behind those bushes.”
“Darn.” How did she do it? He could never sneak up on her. Ever. It was like she had super powers.
Grandma grew stern. “Colin McCauley…”
“Colin,” Brian yelled as he entered the backyard. “I’m heerree.”
Colin raced to join his friend and pulled him away, with the dogs still following him. “Hey, Mr. and Mrs. Daniels. Come on, Brian.”
Brian followed him, and they ran into Great-Aunt Sophie, Grandma’s younger sister. “Hey, Aunt Sophie.”
“Well, Colin, who’s your friend? Is this The Brian?”
Brian puffed out his chest. “Yep. I’m Brian.” He grinned and pointed to a new missing tooth.
“Oh, cool.” Colin peered closer then turned to his aunt and opened his mouth wide. “Me too, Aunt Sophie.” He stared up and up at the man next to her. “Liam?” Del’s dad. He had a hand on Aunt Sophie’s arm. Oh no. Not another pair of kissing people.
“Hey there, Colin.” Liam smiled wide and hugged Aunt Sophie close. “Where’s your grandma and grandpa? I want to say hi.”
“Back in the house. Grandma’s crying with Del.” He sighed. “Too many girls crying all the time.”
“Blech.” Brian agreed.
“Are they okay?” Sophie asked Liam.
“Happy tears, I’ll bet.” He turned to Colin. “Did Del cry?”
“No. She was thanking Grandma for a test or something. Does Del have super powers? ’Cause she always knows where I am.”
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nbsp; Liam laughed loudly. “She’s good like that. Always spotted J.T. too.”
“Is he here?” Colin looked around for him.
“He is.”
“He’s the guy I was telling you about,” Colin said to Brian. “Looks just like him, and he gives tattoos.”
“Oh, cool.”
Liam lifted Jekyll in his big hand and held him high. “So. This is the culprit. The little guy who had you darting in the way of a car. I trust you won’t do that again.”
Colin flushed. “No, sir.”
“Good boy.” Liam put Jekyll back into Colin’s hands and ruffled his hair. “We’ll be back.” He and Aunt Sophie walked in the direction of the house.
“Come on.” Colin ran with Brian and the dogs to the back of the yard, near Colin’s fort—a bunch of cardboard boxes he’d decorated with alien drawings. “Whew. Now we’re safe.”
He and Brian fit without a problem, and Jekyll too. But Hyde whined from outside the small cutout.
“Soon, Hyde. Go find Ubie.”
The dog huffed and left.
“He’s smart.” Brian petted Jekyll, who quivered with joy under his hands.
“Yeah. So’s Jekyll.”
They sat together, looking down at Colin’s toys clustered in the corner.
“So it worked?” Brian asked.
Colin nodded. “Yep. First the puppy, then the new mom. Now I just need the little brother.”
Brian frowned. “Well, be careful. I tried for that and am getting a little sister.” He sighed. “But at least I won’t be the baby anymore.”
“I’ll be careful. I don’t know how to do it, but if I ask Del real nice, I bet she’ll get me one. She loves me.” He had tingles of good feeling running through him. Del was a keeper. He’d known as soon as he met her that she was special.
“Aha. There you are.”
The boys yelled with fright when Colin’s dad reached down from above and lifted Colin out.
“Dad. Brian and me are playing.”
“Not now, you little monster. We have to do the thing with the proposal, remember?”
“Oh. I’ll be back, Brian. I have to ask Del to marry us first. Hold Jekyll for me, okay?”
“Okay.” Brian grinned. Man, he’d lost two teeth now. Colin was one behind.
He wiggled his loose one while his dad dragged him toward the front of the gathered crowd. Where Del—his new mom—waited. She looked so cool. Her hair had loops and braids. She wore a tank top, and her dragon seemed to wink at him. He planned on getting a dragon just like it as soon as his dad and Del said he could. J.T. had already promised he’d do the ink himself. He spotted J.T. and waved, happy when his new uncle waved back.
“Everyone,” Dad said. “Thanks for coming.”
“About time you did this,” Uncle Flynn said. “I had money on last week, but okay.”
The crowd laughed. All his family smiled back at him. Aunt Sophie and Liam, his uncles and new aunts, J.T., Rena, Great-Aunt Linda and Great-Uncle Van and their kids—who were Daddy’s cousins and his too, once-removed or something like that. Brian, even Jekyll and Hyde. It was the best day ever.
His dad cleared his throat, and everyone grew quiet. “Thank you all for coming. Today’s a special day, when I get to celebrate Del Webster agreeing to be my wife.”
Colin’s cue. “And my new mom.”
Everybody cheered.
“Did she really agree? Are you sure?” J.T. teased.
“I did, brother.” Del smirked. “I’m gonna be a McCauley.”
“Darned straight,” Dad said with a grin.
“Hell yeah,” Colin added, and his father said something cross under his breath Colin probably shouldn’t have heard.
“Boy…”
J.T. thought that was really funny, and so did Liam, his soon-to-be granddad. Man, Colin was getting an extra uncle and Aunt Rena too! Christmas would be super special this year. He wondered when Del would let him use those power tools Liam let him try in private.
“She’s mine. End of story.” Dad kissed her right on the lips. Whooee.
When he finished, both he and Del looked kind of goofy. Then she turned to him.
“Aw, Del.” In love with her anyway, even if she was a girl, he closed his eyes and turned his cheek, prepared to take it.
The big kiss turned into a hug, and he squealed when she lifted him up in her strong arms and squeezed.
“I love you, Colin,” she whispered, holding him close.
Now how was a guy supposed to deal with that? So he did what felt right. He hugged her back and kissed her cheek. “I love you too…Mom.”
Then he lifted his head and saw his dad staring at him with a big grin and love in his eyes. His dad looked at Del, then back at him. “A real family for you, Delilah. Kid and all. Can you handle it?”
She sniffed. “In the immortal words of Colin McCauley, hell yeah.”
Laughter abounded and cheers rang out.
Del waved them away. “All right. Show’s over. Now get back to eating and drinking, guys.”
The crowd dispersed, and Brian waved him over while Hyde danced around him and Jekyll nipped at Hyde’s feet.
Colin looked at his father, content to stay in Del’s arms forever. “Dad?”
“Yes, son?” His dad kissed his hand, then kissed Del again.
Colin knew he’d never get a better chance. “So, well, I have Jekyll, and he’s great and all, but…” He turned in Del’s arms and saw Brian giving him a thumbs-up, so he forged onward. Less is more. Keep it simple. Mantras from Ubie he’d been raised hearing. “So if I can’t get a snake…”
“No.” His dad refused.
“Or a tattoo or work in Del’s garage…”
Del—Mom, he reminded himself—chuckled. “Colin, we talked about this.”
“Then I guess a little brother would be okay instead.”
His new mom and his dad looked at each other before she grinned and said, “Oh, he’s good.”
“How do you think he hoodwinked me into a puppy? Con man tried to get hit by a car to soften me up.” His dad plucked him from his mom’s arms and hugged him tight, then whispered, “Nice. We’ll keep working on her. She’s getting there. Trust me.”
“I do, Dad,” he whispered back.
He turned back to his mom, smiled, and said, “I love you, Mom. But about that baby…boys only. No Nancys allowed.”
Read on for an excerpt from
The Troublemaker Next Door
“But Uncle Flynn, you promised.”
Flynn McCauley shook his head, his eyes glued to the television, where the Mariners played out the top of the ninth inning. “Just let me see the highlights from last night’s game. I promise I’ll turn it back in a minute.”
“But, but…” Colin tapered off, and Flynn watched the next few minutes in disbelief. He hadn’t thought the Mariners could pull off the win. Damn, he owed Brody twenty bucks.
The frightening sound of a child’s tears tore Flynn from the game. He stared at his nephew in shock. “Colin?”
Five-and-a-half-year-old Colin McCauley didn’t cry when he skinned his knees, when he’d suffered a black eye from a wild pitch, or when his father had mistakenly thrown away his favorite T-shirt just last week, thinking the holey thing a rag. The kid was tougher than a lot of grown men Flynn knew, a mirror image of Mike in too many ways.
“Colin, what’s wrong, dude?” Panicked when Colin continued to cry, Flynn hurried to change the channel. Then he offered him some of the soda Colin had been asking for earlier but wasn’t allowed to have. Anything to dry up Colin’s tears. “It’s okay, buddy. Don’t cry.” He crossed the couch to hug him, concerned there might be something really wrong.
After a few moments, Colin stopped his tears and squirmed to get free so he could see the television. His grief dried up as if it had never been, not even a hiccup to indicate emotional trauma.
A remarkable recovery. “Are you, or are you not, upset about something?”
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nbsp; Colin took a long drag of soda and laughed at the screen. “Not now.” He beamed, looking exactly like Mike—smug and annoying.
“Scammed by a kid. This is embarrassing.”
“Ubie told me it would work, but I didn’t believe him.”
“Uncle Brody, right. Now why am I not surprised?” He had his best friend and business partner to thank for Colin’s ability to lie with a straight face. “When did he teach you that?”
“At dinner last Sunday. Oh, watch this, Uncle Flynn. See how the monster eats the school? Awesome.” Colin dissolved into boyish laughter.
Flynn sighed and sank into the couch. Babysitting duty wasn’t so bad, or at least it hadn’t been when the kid attended preschool. But if Colin was mastering Brody’s tricks now, imagine what he’d be like at eight, ten… hell, as a teenager. Flynn resolved to have a firm talk with good old Ubie. No point in encouraging Colin to scam people if Flynn wasn’t allowed to be in on the joke.
Flynn sat next to Colin, enjoying the cartoon despite himself. He rubbed the kid’s head. Colin McCauley, future heartbreaker. He had good looks, a great sense of humor, and a quick mind, one that would keep them all on their toes for years to come. Mike had done pretty damn good with the kid, but Flynn liked to think he’d had a hand in Colin’s greatness. At least the part of him that kicked ass at sports.
Just as the back door opened and heavy footsteps signaled Mike’s return—thank God—the phone rang. And rang and rang.
“Flynn, answer the frigging phone, would you?” Mike yelled from the other room.
“What, are his hands broken?” Flynn asked the boy as he reached for the phone. “Can’t he tell I’ m busy watching you?”
Colin ignored him in favor of a cartoon sponge. Like father like son.
Into the phone, Flynn barked, “Yeah?”
“Um, hello?” A woman’s voice. She sounded soft, sexy. Interesting.
Flynn straightened on the couch. “McCauley residence. How can I help you?”
Colin turned to look at him with interest. Flynn never used the good voice on anyone but customers or women.
“Is this Mike?”
“No, but I can get him for you.”
“That would be great.”