He looked at the table briefly then straight into her eyes. “Ben hurt you. Badly. I understand that. What I don’t understand is why you still let him. I know you’ve been dealing with a lot lately, and I’ve tried to be a good friend to you. But I can’t keep doing this.” He paused for a moment. “You’re not ready to move on. I get it. But I’m not gonna wait around until you are.” The muscles in his jaw tightened as he clenched his teeth together. He turned his attention back to his newspaper as Anna joined them.
“Good morning.” Anna was cheerfully oblivious.
The tears stung Maggie’s eyes. “Excuse me.” She fled the table leaving her breakfast behind.
Maggie moved through the day as if on auto-pilot, barely paying attention to what she was doing. She tried to avoid Simon as much as possible and do what she was there to do. But she couldn’t stop thinking about his comments at breakfast. It wasn’t her plan to push him away and hurt him the way she had. The news of his breakup with Michelle had surprised her. And it was rather presumptuous of him to think she would instantly fall into his arms. After everything she had been through with Ben, she thought Simon would have been a little more sensitive and given her a little time to process everything.
And then there was the issue of faithfulness. If he was so willing to leave Michelle for her, what would stop him from leaving her for someone else. This was her greatest fear, and it was this fear that had completely paralyzed her.
She spotted Simon across the room shooting the couple’s first dance. The more she thought about it, the more annoyed she became. What right did he have to be angry with me anyway? If anyone should be upset, it should be me.
When the reception dances were through, Anna approached. “Simon said you can go back to your room if you want. All the main events are pretty much over, and he can handle the rest on his own.”
“Whatever.” Maggie rolled her eyes and walked away from the party. She was too upset to find the bride and groom and congratulate them as she normally would.
Back in her room, she threw herself on the bed and hugged her pillow. Her mind replayed everything once again. She touched her neck, and her stomach flipped at the thought of his lips there. Rolling onto her back, she closed her eyes. It wasn’t that she didn’t want Simon to kiss her, but there was still a part of her that remembered what it felt like to be brokenhearted. The fearful, overly cautious portion of her heart was the reason she was alone five years later. That and her irrational feelings of unfaithfulness to Ben. If she continued on this way and let the fear control her, she would be alone forever.
As she sat up, the muscles in her body screamed from carrying her equipment around all day. She filled the bathtub and soaked for a long time, replaying every moment from the night before as well as the events of the past several months. By the time she climbed out, her fingers and toes were shriveled up like prunes, and her annoyance with Simon had drained away with the bath water. She slipped on a tank top and pajama bottoms and plopped onto the bed while she combed her hair. She closed her eyes. Simon’s words had gotten through to her.
Lord, I don’t know what to do. I do care about him. He’s the first guy I’ve had any real feelings for since Ben. I’m just so afraid of being hurt again. Please show me if he’s the right guy for me.
The sound of Simon’s hotel room door slamming caught her attention. Or maybe it was the door across the hall. She wasn’t certain, so she stuck her ear against the wall separating their rooms. There was definite movement within.
She paced back and forth for a while, unsure of herself, worried that if she went over there, he might slam the door in her face. But she needed to apologize again. She had to make him understand why she had pushed him away, that she was scared to open her heart and trust someone again. He needed to know she might finally be ready to try … with him.
When her nerves were gathered, she pulled her hair up in a loose wet bun, grabbed her key, and headed next door in her pajamas.
The “do not disturb" sign was hanging on the door, but she didn’t care. She raised her hand up to knock. Her stomach was all nerved up again.
What do I say? Hi, Simon. You’re wrong. I am ready for you.
She lowered her hand and took a deep breath. Then, before she had a chance to back out, she knocked three times.
There was a rustling sound of movement behind the door. The deadbolt clicked and the door opened.
Maggie’s jaw almost dropped to the floor.
“Hi, Maggie.” Anna greeted her with a smile, wrapped up in only a bath towel.
“I ...” She didn’t have words.
“Do you need Simon?” Anna glanced back over her shoulder toward the sound of the water running in the bathroom.
“No. Sorry.” She was completely flustered.
“Do you want me to order up some room service?” Simon called from within.
“Goodnight,” Maggie blurted and hurried back to her room, slamming the door behind her.
Maggie sat on the end of her bed shaking, tears streaming down her cheeks. She could hear Anna and Simon talking and laughing. Oh, how she wished she could switch rooms. She quickly searched her bag for her iPod and headphones and raised the volume as loud as she could stand.
I can’t believe it. I’m such an idiot. Thank you, Lord, for giving me an answer. He’s so not the one for me.
On Sunday morning, Maggie sat at the same table by the window and watched the boats floating around in the bay. The sun was shining and puffy white clouds drifted across a bright blue sky, but her mood was more suitable to a grey, rainy day. She took a sip of her coffee. The muffin sitting in front of her remained untouched.
“Good morning, Maggie.” Anna was as perky as ever. She had no clue what she had done.
Maggie barely acknowledged she was there. She rubbed her eyes, puffy from last night’s tears.
“Were you OK last night?” Anna asked, not really paying attention to Maggie. She was texting someone on her phone as she spoke.
“Fine.” Maggie wanted to throw Anna’s stupid phone into the bay. She understood the need to stay connected, but this girl was ridiculous.
Maggie took another sip of coffee.
“Morning, ladies.” Simon sat across from Maggie. He gave her a quick once over. “Everything OK?”
She peered over the edge of her coffee cup at him, then returned it to the table with a loud clink.
“Maggie?” He stared at her.
Her eyes narrowed. It annoyed her to hear him call her by her name. She didn’t answer him.
He looked at her with honest concern. “Mags? What’s wrong?” He waited for a response.
She glared at him. He had never called her that before. It infuriated her so much that she grabbed the muffin from her plate and tossed it at his head.
“Ow!” Simon grabbed his head. “What the?”
Anna covered her mouth to keep from laughing.
“You are a jerk!” Maggie knocked her chair over backwards as she stood and rushed out of the room toward the elevator. She couldn’t wait to get back to her room and pack so she could get out of there. If only she didn’t have to spend four hours in the car with them.
“Woah! Woah! Woah!” Simon ran toward her as the elevator doors began to close.
“No!” Maggie entered the elevator and pressed the “close doors” button over and over.
He stuck his arm in between the doors to stop them and climbed in next to her.
She tried to step out, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her back as the doors closed. She poked the button for their floor, and the elevator began to move.
“Let go of me, Simon,” she demanded.
“What is going on?” He did not loosen his grip on her arm. “Is this about breakfast yesterday?”
Maggie twisted her arm out of his grasp as the doors opened. She sped out into the hall to the door of her room.
He was right on her heels.
She fiddled with her room key, trying to unlock the d
oor, but her anger and his presence caused her to drop it numerous times. She groaned in frustration.
“Maggie, calm down.” He bent and picked up her key.
“Don’t tell me what to do,” she snarled as she grabbed for it.
He held it above her head, just out of her reach. “I’ll give you this key when you tell me what’s wrong.”
She leaned back against her door with a thud.
“Look, I’m sorry about what I said at breakfast yesterday. I really am. I was just upset. Can you blame me?”
Maggie shook her head. “This isn’t about the other night.”
“No?” he asked. “Then what?”
“It’s about last night.”
“What? The wedding? Did you want to stay ’til the end of the reception?” He looked at her searchingly.“I thought you worked pretty hard all day and you might need some rest.”
She rolled her eyes. “That’s not it.”
He grabbed her arms and looked into her eyes. “You’re gonna have to give me a little more of the story here. What did I do?”
“Anna,” she replied pointedly.
“You’re mad at Anna?”
“Just you.” She stared at him smugly.
Simon groaned. “Again, Mags. I need more.”
“Stop calling me Mags,” she spoke through gritted teeth.
“What?” Simon let go of her arms and walked a few steps down the hall, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. He spun around and returned to her. “Maggie, please.”
“I went to your room last night.” She was embarrassed to admit it.
Simon raised an eyebrow and grinned. “You came to my room?” But a sudden look of realization crossed his face, and his expression turned serious. “And you saw Anna.”
Maggie did her best to stop the tears from falling.
Simon took her arms once more. “I can explain.”
She shook them off. “No need.” She glared. “You sure move quickly.”
He nodded as if in agreement. “Well, what did you expect?”
“Not that. But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. You’re still the same Simon I knew in college. The same Simon who broke Emma’s heart.”
“Emma?” He looked completely bewildered. “Why are you bringing that up? That … that was years ago.”
“And you haven’t changed a bit.”
He shook his head furiously and tossed the key at her. “Be down at the car in an hour.”
“Forget it! I’ll rent a car,” she declared bitterly.
“Fine!” he yelled over his shoulder as he stormed away.
“Fine!”
October 31, 2009
Happy Anniversary
A few weeks after the horrible Petoskey trip, a bit of happiness arrived in Maggie's mail in the form of an invitation to Vi and Dave’s anniversary party at Pete's on Halloween. Maggie was overjoyed when she opened the envelope and saw their names together. Some people were meant to be together in good times and bad. Things hadn’t been the same when they were apart. Seeing them come together over the summer and rekindle their relationship gave her a glimpse of what it takes to make real love work. They had weathered the storm and come out on the other side stronger and more in love than they were before.
On Halloween night, Maggie and Sarah spent the evening taking pictures of all the little ghosts and goblins that stopped by her shop. This had become an annual tradition. The photos were developed a few days after Halloween and strung across the room with clips and a wire. Parents would stop by the following week for a print of their child along with a discount coupon for more prints or a photo session. It was a fun way for her to connect with the community and, hopefully, help her to book more sessions.
When the trick-or-treating was through, Maggie left her car at work and rode with Sarah to Uncle Pete's. They drove slowly through town to avoid all the little kids crossing the streets.
It was a mild fall evening, perfect for a bonfire. Cool enough for a sweater, but not cold enough for a coat.
At Uncle Pete’s, Sarah parked her car next to Simon's and got out.
Maggie stared at his car for a minute. After all that had happened up north, she did not want to see him.
Sarah turned around when she realized Maggie wasn't following her. She walked over to the passenger side of the car and opened the door. "What's the matter?"
“Nothing.” She shook her head as she climbed out.
“Are you sure?"
“Yep!” She tried to sound chipper.
Sarah gave her a look. "I need to go find Tom."
"Go ahead." Maggie waved her away.
Sarah hesitantly left her side.
The yard was decorated with orange Chinese lanterns and white lights strung between the trees. The bonfire was already burning strong, and there was a table with cider, donuts and cookies, as well as a pumpkin shaped anniversary cake.
The invitation had read "costumes optional", so Maggie opted not to dress up. She glanced around and noticed about half of the guests were in costume. The guests of honor were dressed as the King and Queen of Hearts, which seemed appropriate.
Sarah and Tom suddenly emerged from the house.
"Argh!" Tom called out. He was dressed as a pirate with a black eye patch and wielded a “dangerous” looking plastic sword. Sarah, the pirate's wench, was on his arm.
“Cool costume, Tommy.”
"Argh!" he repeated.
"Is that the only thing you know how to say?" asked Maggie.
He seemed deep in thought for a moment. "Uh ... shiver me timbers?”
The girls cracked up at his silliness.
"Nice, Tom."
"That's Cap'n Tom to you,” he resumed the pirate speak.
Maggie shook her head. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Simon approaching.
"Hey," he greeted them.
Maggie looked him over. He was wearing a trench coat and carrying a flashlight and a stuffed alien toy under his arm. "Who are you supposed to be?"
He held up an FBI badge. "Fox Mulder. FBI."
She laughed at that. "The X-Files are closed, Mulder." Simon had been at their apartment nearly every week during college watching that television show with Michelle. She never understood their fascination with it, but they watched it religiously. Michelle even had a big “I Want To Believe” poster, a gift from Simon, on the wall of her bedroom.
"You didn't dress up," he stated.
She held up the camera that was hanging over her shoulder. "I'm a photographer.”
He shook his head, reached into his pocket, and tossed a red wig at her. "Let's go, Scully. The truth is out there."
Tom grabbed the wig from Maggie’s hands and pushed it onto her head.
She rolled her eyes, adjusted the wig, and followed them across the yard to the bonfire.
Maggie sat alone roasting a marshmallow. She watched Vi and Dave on the other side of the fire. They were so sweet and attentive to each other, and it made her smile to herself. All they had gone through and here they were back together again.
Her thoughts turned to Petoskey and sadness washed over her. She had been so close, standing at Simon’s door, ready to tell him she wanted to try with him, and then everything had gone so horribly wrong.
But God had answered her prayer. Maybe not in the way she thought it would be answered, but she was thankful to be reminded of the kind of guy Simon really was. She would rather be single for the rest of her life than go through that kind of pain again. Bullet dodged.
While she was lost in her thoughts, the marshmallow she had been roasting was lost to the fire. She pulled the empty stick out of the flames, leaned it against the hay bale she’d been sitting on, and walked to the end of the dock. It seemed a lifetime ago since she and Simon had been in that very spot. She stared out at the lake, trying not to think about them splashing and laughing and holding each other that night. Things felt very different now.
Footsteps against the wood plank
s made her heart skip a beat. She turned to see Uncle Pete approaching her.
“Hello there, Maggie.”
“Hi, Pete.”
“Can I talk with you?"
“Sure.”
Pete took a seat and patted the dock next to him.
She nodded and took a seat.
"I'd like this conversation to be just between us if that’s all right with you.”
Maggie looked confused. She and Pete had never talked much before this, at least not about anything serious.
“Of course," she replied.
"I've been watching my nephew this year, and I've seen a change in him since he started coming to town." He paused for a moment. "I'm not so sure I like what I see."
"What do you mean?"
"I see too much of myself in him."
"And that's a bad thing?" asked Maggie.
"Just between us, right?" He looked her in the eye for confirmation.
She nodded again. "Absolutely."
"I love Vi. I always have, and I always will."
Maggie was shocked at his confession and surprised he was trusting her with such personal information.
"I loved her all those years ago, and I waited for her for a long time." He sighed. "And she chose Dave."
She could see the pain in his eyes now. Much like her, he was very good at hiding his true emotions. When they were all together playing cards, it seemed all was fine. But he had opened himself up for her to see a deep love and even deeper hurt, which he normally tucked far down inside.
“I never knew.” Maggie had a strong urge to comfort him. “If you love her so much, how can you spend so much time with them? How can you host their anniversary party?”
“It’s hard to be around ‘em sometimes, but I am thankful for their friendship.”
They sat in silence for a few moments. She wasn’t sure what this had to do with Simon.
"This is the life I chose. I’m alone because I waited too long for a woman who never really loved me."
"It's not too late,” Maggie encouraged him. “You could still find someone to share your life with."
"Nah," he shook his head. "I'm fine with being alone. But I don't want that for Simon."
Goodbye, Magnolia (Cornerstone Book 1) Page 16