Worth It All

by Claudia Connor

  She delivered the pitcher, then unloaded another round at the next table over. Careful not to make eye contact with the four men she was serving, she placed each of the eight beers down. On her last one, she glanced across the room and her gaze collided with the last person she expected to see.

  Jake.

  Her heart couldn’t have stopped, not literally, but it felt that way, and she bobbled the last glass, sloshing beer onto the table.

  “Watch it now, darling. If you want me to take my clothes off, all you got to do is ask.”

  “Sorry.” The man’s shirt was already open two buttons past desperate. She spun away, feeling icky just being near them.

  Jake sat alone at a table in the center of the room, his dark eyes just as intense as she remembered and aimed right at her. She laid her tray on the bar and walked toward him.

  There was something in his expression that pulled at her. Something soft and deep and maybe a little broken. Which was crazy, because nothing about him looked at all broken.

  “Hey,” she said, reaching his table. “Don’t tell me you eat here too.”

  He smiled. “No. I went by the diner earlier. I saw Jenny and she told me you were here.”

  “Oh.” So he did still go to the diner, but she wasn’t there. Because she was here. And now he was here too. “Do you need a drink?”

  “No, I’m set.” He raised the nearly full bottle in his hand.

  Right. She just managed not to thunk her palm against her forehead.

  “I saw Casey at the diner,” he went on. “She wasn’t wearing her prosthesis. Is it still bothering her?”

  “I don’t know. Some days it seems fine and other days she says it is. I’ve asked her a hundred times, but she never gives me a real reason, which makes me think it’s not really hurting her at all. But obviously I don’t know for sure. I can’t tell her it’s not hurting if she says it is.” She sighed and shook her head at all the things she didn’t know and all the ways she could screw up.

  “Hmm. The mystery of a five-year-old.”

  That made her smile and when she met his eyes she felt a warm vibration from her head all the way to her toes.

  “Can you sit?”

  “Um…sure. For a second.” Because she could resist handsome, or so she told herself, but his honest concern for Casey was impossible. She slid onto the wooden bench across from him as classic Aerosmith played in the background. The air hummed between them, or maybe that was just her blood rushing around in places she didn’t usually notice.

  He shifted and rested his forearms on the table, causing the sleeves of his T-shirt to strain around his biceps and other parts of her body to flutter.

  “You work hard,” he added a moment later.

  “I don’t mind. And I’m off at ten tonight. It’s not too bad.”

  “Right. Jenny told me. She also said you needed a ride.”

  “Really? That’s funny, since Jenny was my ride.” She rolled her eyes to the ceiling. Jenny the matchmaker. “My car wouldn’t start this morning.”

  “She said to tell you Casey was especially tired tonight. I’m also supposed to give you a message from Casey that she is not especially tired at all. Jenny said she would call you, but you didn’t have a cell so…I guess I’m the messenger and the ride. If that’s okay.”

  The thought of a ride in the dark with Jake sent a shiver up her spine. “You don’t have to do that. I can take the bus.”

  “The bus?”

  He said the word like it was such a crazy idea. “Sure.” She assumed there was a bus and it wasn’t like she hadn’t taken it hundreds of times. When she was young and her mom was too relaxed to drive her. When she didn’t have money for gas, or her car wasn’t running, or—

  His expression turned serious. “You’re not taking the bus.”

  “Really?” She raised a playful eyebrow. “Bossy much?”

  “I’m the youngest of seven kids,” he said. “I never got the chance to be bossy.”

  “Seven? Wow. That’s a lot.”

  “Yeah.” He agreed and took a drink of his beer.

  “I don’t get off for another hour.”

  “That’s fine. I’ll wait. It’s live music night, right?” He gestured with his bottle to a stool on a small raised platform at the front of the restaurant. The owner’s idea to draw in more business.

  Her boss passed by the table. “You’re on in fifteen.” He motioned toward a guy plugging in cords and adjusting the microphone.

  Jake’s brows shot up and he leaned forward. “Wait. You’re the entertainment?”

  She was going to kill Jenny. “Not really. No. Jenny’s sort of boyfriend knows a guy who knows a guy. They were looking for somebody.” She lifted a shoulder. “It’s just this once. They needed someone to fill in and Jenny mentioned me. It’s an extra fifty bucks. No big deal.”

  Except the extra money. That was a big deal.

  “It’s really just background music while people eat,” she went on. “Most of them don’t even listen.”

  Keep talking, Paige. Maybe he’ll get bored and leave.

  “You don’t need to stay.”

  “Nervous?” He followed the question with just a hint of his sexy smile and her stomach did a full-out dance. It didn’t take much where Jake was concerned.

  “Maybe. A little.” She blew out a breath. “Okay. A lot. I’m really wishing I hadn’t agreed to this.”

  “I’m sure you’re good. He wouldn’t have asked you if you weren’t.”

  “Well, since this is my first time, we’re about to find out.”

  “First time singing?”

  “Well, I sing to Casey, but she’s a pretty gentle audience.”

  “Want to have a drink? Shore yourself up a bit?”

  Without waiting, he lifted a hand and easily got the attention of one of the other waitresses. Not hard since they were staring at him like they were starving kittens and he was a bowl of cream. Desperate, hungry, and a little feral.

  Megan, one of the kittens, rushed to their table and sent Paige a pointed look. A mix of What the hell are you doing? and Damn, I wish it was me.

  “Two shots of tequila,” he said.

  Shots?

  “You got it.” Megan smiled at him and walked away, swinging what she had to swing. The frayed edges of her cutoffs barely made it legal.

  Jake didn’t look. Not even a glance. Yep. Extremely decent. “I rarely drink. Rarely being never.”

  “Special occasion,” he said easily. “So what do you do? Sing? Dance?”

  “Not in a million years would I dance. I sing a little, and Richie, the friend of the friend, plays the guitar. I’m going to kill Jenny.” She closed her eyes a moment, considered clicking her heels to see if it would make her disappear. She opened them. Nope. Still here. Still desperately embarrassed. “I’ll pay you back for the drink.”

  “I’m not keeping a tab.”

  Two seconds later, Megan reappeared and delivered the shots with a wink.

  Jake raised his glass of clear liquid. “To background music.”

  With his eyes holding hers, he smiled and everything in her melted. It was more than his staggering looks or obvious intelligence, even more than his willingness to help her daughter. And so caught up in him and the faint dimple in his right cheek, she clinked her glass to his, tossed it back without thinking—and almost died.

  Gasping, eyes squeezed shut, her entire body shuddered in a desperate effort to survive whatever she’d just swallowed. She reached for his bottle while her other hand waved to extinguish the fire inside her. Didn’t help and she choked on the beer.

  “Sorry, jeez. That’s like drinking gasoline.” She coughed again as the fiery liquid continued to burn down her throat and through her body.

  Jake watched her suffering, looking somewhat amused. He’d tossed his back like a pro. “It’ll warm you up. Put hair on your chest.”

  “Great.” There was a tap on the open mic, and she glanced quickly over h
er shoulder, then straightened and took a deep breath. Crap. “Here goes.” She scooted out slowly and stood.

  She could do this. Walk to the front of the room. Sing five songs. Go home. Kill Jenny. Bury body.

  She gave Jake one last look and almost sat back down. Was it possible for alcohol to kick in this fast? Because when his smile broadened and sparked something in his eyes, she felt a little dizzy.

  “I’ll be a gentle audience,” he said softly. “Pretend it’s just me.”

  “Right. Okay. I’ll count on you for a rescue if people start throwing things.”

  His gaze darkened. “I’d never let that happen.”

  He was totally serious, and even though he made her a million times more nervous, it was oddly reassuring. Like he had her back.

  With her heart pounding, she made her way to the mic. If she didn’t have a heart attack in the next twenty minutes, she deserved a lot more than fifty dollars.

  —

  Put hair on her chest? Could he be any more of a fucking idiot?

  And now he was focused on her chest, much better showcased in clinging cotton than the uniform blouse she wore at the diner. Damn, she was beautiful. But there was more. A hell of a lot more. Her face, her smile, her blue eyes that he repeatedly found himself getting lost in. He wondered if everyone saw it, figured they did, and wished he could hide her away from the other eyes in the room. If he’d known she’d be singing, he would have tried for a closer table.

  Paige slid onto a stool, one long leg straight, the other bent with her foot on the lowest rung. The group of men at the bar gave her their full attention, no surprise there. She’d pulled the band from her hair so that it now fell several inches past her shoulders like pale silk curtains on either side of her face.

  “Hi, my name is Paige and this is Richie.” She readjusted herself on the stool, switched her legs, never looking at her audience. “We’ll be your entertainment for the next twenty minutes.”

  She smiled over at the guy with the guitar, probably to let him know she was ready, but Jake felt the muscles in his jaw tighten. He didn’t like another man backing her up, easing her nerves. He played a little himself, another thing he’d picked up since the accident. Never considered playing in front of people, but he would. For her.

  He’d thought about her way more than he should have since she’d been in his office. Standing close to him, smiling, talking. Somehow he’d ended up at the diner, telling himself it was to check on Casey’s prosthesis. That’s it. It was work. He just wanted to know if his adjustment had solved the problem. And yet here he was, staring at Paige, an uncomfortable feeling in his chest, like if he blinked she might disappear.

  He shook his head at himself and finished his beer.

  Her soft voice flowed out and around him, clean and clear, so effortless, no one would ever know she was nervous. It was true, most people continued with light conversation as they ate except for the four men seated at the table nearest the stage. Not there for food with their hot looks and whistles between songs that had him grinding his teeth. And again, he wished for a closer seat.

  Midway through the set, she glanced up and her eyes found his. He gave her a thumbs-up. The grateful smile she sent him knocked him in the chest and he fell, more than a little.

  The singer-songwriter classics made him think of quiet nights and walks on the beach. Or maybe it was her voice. Or her. Or…Crazy, whatever it was, since he knew nothing of those things. Had never experienced them and hadn’t wanted to.

  But watching Paige, he couldn’t stop himself from thinking what it would be like to steal her away somewhere. To take his time running his hands over all that smooth, pale skin. His hands, then his mouth.

  His only relationship had been as a perpetually horny high school kid going all the way with his girlfriend whenever and wherever they could without getting caught. His ex-girlfriend, Rachel, was hot and cold, sexy as sin one second, spitting mean the next, and he’d been infatuated. The two of them together had been the epitome of teen love. Young, explosive, turbulent.

  The football star and the cheerleader, king and queen of the prom. But he’d been a senior with dreams of the NFL while she’d been a junior, drawing hearts on her notebooks and trying out his last name.

  It had been football, Rachel, school, in that order, meaning he put himself first. And then in seconds everything changed. Maybe God had felt the need to knock him down a few pegs. But then, it wasn’t God who’d glared at his girlfriend instead of the road or pressed the gas instead of the brake.

  He straightened his leg under the table, the slight ache in his thigh reminding him he’d gotten exactly what he’d deserved.

  Paige finished her set and went right back to serving, and damn it, her first order was for the table of drooling assholes. Paige ignored them, but he kept a close eye, hating how their eyes roamed her slender frame like she was on the damn menu.

  She wasn’t his, but she sure as hell wasn’t theirs.

  For the next thirty minutes he watched her work, their eyes meeting ever so often. He ordered a water, read and returned emails on his phone, and waited. And then waited some more.

  She was off at ten. That was twenty minutes ago. The next time she passed his table, he reached out and caught her wrist. “You’re done,” he said, and without thinking, brushed his thumb over the soft skin there.

  Her gaze fell to his hand, but she didn’t pull away. “You don’t have to wait.”

  “It’s not the waiting that’s bothering me. It’s you working any longer than you already have.” She worked too hard. No telling how long she’d already worked today.

  “Okay.” She swallowed, her blue eyes staring back at his. “Just let me close out.”

  Minutes later, he felt like a winner as she walked out beside him and away from every other man in the room. Any man would feel like that with a woman like Paige at his side. Not a woman like her, but her.

  “I can still take the bus, you know. Or I could walk. It’s not that far.”

  Was she serious? “You’re not taking the bus. And you’re sure as hell not walking. Really, Paige, it’s no big deal.”

  She sent him a quick grateful smile. “Okay. Thank you.”

  They reached his truck and he opened the passenger door, offering his hand for a step up. She hesitated, and when she took it, he felt it tremble in his.

  Was she afraid? As in, woman gets in car with man never to be seen again? Shit. He hadn’t thought of that. He rounded the hood and got in but didn’t start the engine. “I have a sister,” he blurted and she looked over at him as surprised as he was.

  “Five brothers and one sister. I don’t know….” He wrapped his fingers around the steering wheel and looked straight ahead. “I thought it might put you at ease.”

  “Thank you.” She sent him a grateful smile that was pure gold. “I appreciate that. I’m okay, though. Jenny knows where I am and she knows where you work.”

  “Okay.” Of course. He turned the key and pulled out. “Hot? Cold?” He reached for the controls to turn down the air he’d had blasting earlier.

  “I’m fine.”

  “Hungry? We can stop if you want.” He’d like to stop. This ride was going to be too damn short.

  “I’m fine,” she said again, and he caught a cute grin before she turned to the window.

  She told him the first few turns and they rode a ways in silence. He managed to keep his eyes on the road. Not easy with Paige sitting so close beside him, her feminine scent filling the space. Light and subtle, but it made him imagine getting closer, less subtle.

  “You were really good tonight. The singing,” he clarified.

  “Thanks.” Her teeth scraped over her bottom lip and he just managed not to run them into the gutter.

  “You sure you don’t want to be a singer?”

  “Ugh. No.” She scrunched up her nose. “I like to sing. I do not like to sing in front of people.”

  “But you did it.”

&n
bsp; “Yeah, well. Sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do.”

  He glanced at her profile. She didn’t sound bitter when she said it, or sad, and he wondered how often she had to do things she didn’t want to do.

  “So you’re the youngest of seven? That’s crazy. Do they live around here?”

  “No,” he said, stopping at a light. “None of them do. They all live in Virginia.”

  She gave him a long, considering look. “And you live here.”

  “Yes.” From one ocean to another. From his past to his present.

  “Do they have kids? I only ask because you’re so good with Casey.”

  He rolled his palms over the wheel. “Yeah. They all have several. It’s kind of a zoo when we’re all together.”

  “Sounds fun,” she said, a wistfulness to her voice.

  They all thought so, had all wanted that life. What was wrong with him that when given the opportunity he hadn’t wanted the same?

  “What about your family?”

  “Just Jenny and Casey. My mom lives in Texas. Turn at the next left, then the first right.”

  She didn’t mention her father. More important, she didn’t mention Casey’s.

  “It’s the next left, then the second-to-last trailer on the left.”

  The main road into the mobile home park was gravel, and his wheels crunched as he slowed.

  “This is it.”

  The trailer she directed him to was similar to all the others. White with streaks of rust running down in places like brown tears. He’d never thought of a structure as literally being tired, but Paige’s mobile home appeared beyond exhaustion.

  Her faded blue hatchback blocked the space in front, so he pulled to the side and stopped behind a white Chevy. He barely had it in park before she was getting out, not giving him a chance to open her door.

  “Thanks for the ride.”

  He cut the engine and followed her. She’d just rounded his hood when the trailer door opened and Jenny came out and down the steps.

  “Hey, handsome. Casey’s asleep.” She gave an exaggerated wink to Paige. “You’re welcome.”