“But sometimes there are few if any choices,” Mia countered. “I know women whose husbands have died. They have no other family to go to. What choice do they have but to work—work to help support their children?”
“I realize there are situations as you describe—far more than I could ever understand or approve. But, Mia, that is where the church community comes in. You are doing a good and right thing here. By offering help from our abundance, we can better the lives of those in need. That is what God calls us to do. If everyone who has abundance would yield to aid those in want, we would see remarkable things done. We might even see hunger eliminated. What we’re doing here is a small act, but if others could be encouraged to do likewise, it would have a big impact.”
Mia thought immediately of Sarah Hale and the influence she held over thousands of readers. Perhaps Godey’s could be utilized to organize some type of nationwide focus on collecting food items for the poor. Maybe churches could be encouraged to set up storehouses for the needy. It was all a possibility, and definitely the kind of thing that would interest Mrs. Hale.
“A friend of mine said that we could also help bring about change by using our position and relationships to influence. Do you believe that’s true?”
Pastor Brunswick looked up from his task. He’d been putting beans into small bags and tying them off before stacking them into piles. “I think it’s at the root of all we hold dear, Mia. After all, how does one share the love of God with another? We first establish a friendship or knowledge of one another. Of course some people hear the Word of God preached and immediately accept it, but more often there are people who walk your path day in and day out who have never really heard. They’ve been hurt by something and blame God, or they had no real understanding of who God is and how much He loves them.
“By establishing a friendship or relationship with someone who knows the love of God firsthand, they can be won over by degrees. They will see that person—how he lives and conducts himself. They will see him in good times and bad, turning to the Lord and finding comfort. Frankly, I might never have become a minister had it not been for one little old woman who lived in my neighborhood.”
Mia was completely captivated. “Who was she?”
“She was a very poor woman who lived all alone after her husband and two sons were killed at sea. Remember, I grew up in Maine. We lived in a small fishing village. The woman’s family went to sea and their boat capsized in a storm. Anyway, despite all she’d lost, she was the happiest person I have ever known. The kindest too.” He opened another bag and began to scoop in beans. “One day when I was about sixteen, I encountered her as she tended her garden. She was singing a hymn and seemed to be full of joy. I asked her what made her so happy and she told me it was the joy of the Lord.”
“Most Christians seem anything but joyous,” Mia admitted.
“I agree, but I realized something from this woman. Happiness in the Lord made her burdens so much easier to bear. Knowing that God was at her side, no matter the situation, eased her worry and concern about tomorrow. She had nothing of value monetarily, but she had everything a person could want otherwise.”
Mia thought about this for a moment. “Sometimes it’s hard to be happy, even when you have everything.” She pushed back from the table and folded her hands. “I find myself very troubled by the people I’ve met—the seamen’s wives and the factory workers. There are so many people and their need is great. I want to help them all, but I can’t.”
Pastor Brunswick gave her nod and a knowing smile. “It hurts to see them hurting.”
“Yes. Yes, it does. I look at their little children, dressed in ragged clothes. They’re dirty and hungry, and they look at me with eyes that seem accusing. Guilt consumes me for enjoying the plenty God has given—because I see their faces no matter what I do.”
“Mia, it’s because you are such a compassionate and loving person that you feel as you do. God would want you to bless Him for the abundance He has given. It’s a blessing, but it can also be a curse. If we focus on ourselves and how much we have, rather than seeing how much we can do with what God has given, we can easily fall into sin. You care for those people because God has given you the desire to care for them.”
“But can helping one or even a few dozen help—truly help?” She motioned at the goods on the table. “This seems like such a pittance.”
“But, Mia, you have no way of knowing the plans God has for this. You might save one life—and wouldn’t one be enough? If you had it in your power to reach out and save one person, but no more, would you not still consider it a worthy effort and take on the task? Jesus speaks in the Bible of leaving the ninety-nine to go in search of the one. The one has value, Mia. Even if one tiny child consumes this food and lives to see another day, it is worth our efforts here.”
“I suppose I hadn’t thought of it that way.”
“Jesus healed many people, but many went untouched. Was He cruel to heal the few—to leave the others?”
“Frankly, I’ve always wondered why Jesus didn’t just set the world right when He came,” Mia replied.
Pastor Brunswick smiled. “Ah, but He did, Mia. He truly did.”
“I’m so happy to hear that the money bought so many supplies,” Mercy told Mia at supper that night.
The finest embroidered Irish linen graced the table and three gold candelabra each held six ivory-colored candles. China, so delicate one could see light through the cups, created a fashionable setting. But this was all just a stage for the delectable feast created by the Wilson cook.
Succulent roast pork with currants in brandy sauce and game hens stuffed with chestnuts and rice shared space with creamed asparagus spears, candied carrots, and roasted apples. Mia only wished that she had an appetite, but the summer heat had robbed her of that.
She poked at her food to at least give the pretense of eating. “Pastor Brunswick said that sometimes it takes very little to help a great many people. I must say I was surprised as well. When we finished we had more goods than crates. Pastor said he would deliver them after church tomorrow. I thought it might be nice to go and help.”
“It might be nice, but it wouldn’t necessarily be safe,” Garrett said as a servant offered additional sauce for his pork.
“Safety isn’t my only concern in life,” Mia replied.
“I know that only too well,” Garrett said, offering her a raised brow and a smile. He waved off the servant and returned his attention to the meal.
Mia decided to let his statement pass. She didn’t want to fight at the table. “Mercy, please tell me how Mr. Wilson is feeling.”
“He’s much the same,” she admitted. “He’s very weak and takes so little food and water. He says it hurts too much, and he’d rather go without. Of course, going without will end his life perhaps even quicker than his disease.”
“I wonder if you might like to have a nurse to sit with Father,” Garrett suggested. “I know the baby needs you often, as do the girls. It might afford you time with them, and for rest.”
Mercy opened her mouth as if to reject the idea, then paused. She put down her glass and nodded. “That might be a good idea. I cannot do it all on my own.”
“Nor should you. Father is now in need of more specialized care as his condition worsens. I’ll get someone over here tomorrow.”
“Make certain that he or she is a kind and temperate soul. I would not wish for them to lose their temper with your father.”
“What of the nanny?” Mia asked. “She often says there isn’t enough to do anyway, so what if she were to care for Mr. Wilson instead? I could easily fill in to help with the children. I could take them for walks and play with them. I could even help with their meals.”
“That’s a wonderful idea, Mia. Nanny is a very eventempered soul, and she has worked in the nursing care of children. Her first charge was an ill little boy. I’ll speak to her, and if she’s agreeable we will make the changes.”
“If not,�
� Garrett said, “I’m sure we can find someone else.”
After picking at her food for another twenty minutes, Mia longed only for a cool bath. She finally gave up the pretense. “I’m sorry. The food is quite good, but I am not hungry. The heat is simply unbearable.”
“I was feeling the same way,” Mercy said. “We should all be better off to sit in the garden and enjoy what little breeze it affords. This rich food is completely wasted on us.” She started to get up from the table and Garrett hurried to her side. He managed the chair with one hand while assisting Mercy with the other.
“You two have been a tremendous blessing to me. I hope you know that. You might have thought you were staying here to avoid a marriage of convenience, Mia, but I think God had other plans altogether.”
Mia met Mercy’s loving gaze and smiled. “I’m glad I can be a help to you.”
“Now if you’ll excuse me, I want to see if the girls are still awake. If they are, I’ll have them join us in the garden.”
Mercy turned and instructed the servants to bring some fresh fruit and iced drinks to the garden before heading upstairs. Garrett, meanwhile, came to Mia and helped her from the table.
“You are a blessing, you know,” he said. “I’ve been rather hard on you at times, but I do count myself fortunate to have you in my life.”
Mia felt the warmth of his hand on hers. She trembled at his touch, feeling weak at the very nearness of him. “I too am blessed.” She was barely able to whisper the words.
“I also want you to know something else. You have influenced me to do more for those less fortunate than I. I’m setting up a special bank account for Pastor Brunswick to use in order to purchase goods for the poor. I’ve arranged for a monthly stipend to go into the account from our profits. I plan to speak to some of my friends and encourage them to do likewise. It won’t end poverty, but it is a start.”
Mia could hardly believe what she’d heard. “Oh, Garrett, you are truly the most wonderful man I know. You bear my grief so well and never hold it against me.” She longed to embrace him and kiss him in gratitude but knew it was far from appropriate.
“You bear my moods and my overprotective nature equally well,” he said, leading her to the garden. “I suppose there is no one who endures me quite as well as you.”
Mia felt her throat constrict. She wanted to shout out her feelings for him—to tell him that she could only hope that he might love her in the same way. Walking beside him served to engrave those feelings more deeply into her heart.
I’m in love with you, Garrett Wilson. You have completely stolen my heart.
“Garrett, there is something I’d like to say.” She struggled for the words. How brazen it would seem of her to just blurt out her thoughts.
“You know that you can tell me anything.” He walked her to an arrangement of chairs and waited until she had taken a seat before adding, “I promise to behave myself and not chastise you no matter the topic.”
“Well . . . that is . . . something has come to my attention.” That didn’t sound the way she had hoped it would. Mia cleared her throat and decided to start again. “What I mean to say is that I have been aware of something . . .” She stopped and shook her head. Nothing sounded right.
“Garrett!” Bliss burst onto the scene clad in a lightweight nightgown and mobcap. “Mama said we could sit with you and have cold lemonade.”
“Did she now?” Garrett scooped the child into his arms. “I believe that sounds quite wonderful.” He helped her to sit on his lap, then turned to Mia. “You were saying?”
Agnes joined them as abruptly as her sister had, and Mia smiled tolerantly. “We can discuss the matter another time.”
CHAPTER 19
“Where’s Mia?” Garrett questioned as he entered the front sitting room.
Mercy shifted the sleeping Lenore to her other arm. “She took Bliss and Agnes for a walk. They won’t be gone long.”
Garrett felt the opportunity too good to pass up. “Might I sit with you for a moment? I want to ask you something.”
“But of course. Your father is sleeping rather peacefully since the doctor gave him that new tonic. I hope it staves off the pain.”
“I do too.” Garrett lifted the tails of his jacket and eased back onto the settee. “I’m glad they’ve found something to help him rest.”
“It won’t be long, you know.” Mercy drew a deep breath. “I try not to dwell on it, but it constantly stares me in the face. The process of a long death is an ordeal to everyone it touches.”
“You have borne it well,” Garrett said. “I cannot imagine another woman enduring nearly as much, and you with a babe and two young daughters.”
“Certainly you know that I could not have done it without you—or Mia, for that matter. My, but she has turned out to be a tremendous help. She will make someone a fine wife one day.”
“Mia is the one I wish to discuss.”
Mercy cocked her head ever so slightly to the right and smiled. “Is she now.”
“I’ve cared about her all of her life. At first she was like a little sister to watch over and protect, but now I feel infinitely more for her than what a brother would.”
“Garrett, I must say this is the first time I’ve heard you voice any interest in a particular woman. Mia is a fine choice . . . however, I was recently discussing the subject with her and she indicated an interest in someone.”
Garrett moved to the edge of his seat. “Did she say who?”
Mercy shook her head. “She was convinced he didn’t even know she was alive. I remember that in particular, because I thought surely such a thing impossible. She seemed fairly enamored with this person, but gave no indication of his identity.”
Garrett felt his stomach sour. “She’s said nothing to me of it.”
“She may feel it would be inappropriate.”
He frowned, knowing that over the past few months Mia had managed quite a few secrets.
“I don’t believe that her interest in someone else means you should necessarily give up your interest in her,” Mercy said. “After all, perhaps Mia is right and this man has no desire to court her. No, I do not believe you should merely walk away without stating your intentions and desires.”
“I’ve tried to talk to her several times, but something always interferes. Then when I think a moment might present itself, she goes and does something that sets me at odds with her. That, of course, hardly seems the time to declare love.”
Mercy laughed. “No, I suppose not. Still, leaving such a thing unsaid—something as important as this—is to risk losing any chance at all. Mia is a beautiful woman, and how she has managed to remain single this long is a puzzlement to me.”
“She has had no need to barter herself away, for one. So many of her friends find themselves in arranged marriages to benefit their father’s coffers. Mia’s father cares more for his child than his bank account. Nor has she faced public ridicule as a less attractive person might. Mia’s appearance is truly all that any woman should desire, so none may criticize her there.”
“True. And she is loving and amiable, and she has a generous caring spirit for those less fortunate.”
“With a bit of temper and stubborn determination thrown in,” Garrett added.
Mercy nodded. “But most men prefer a woman who can think for herself and voice an opinion—even when that opinion runs contrary to her husband’s. Your father has always told me he appreciates my willingness to debate a matter on which we do not see eye to eye. He has changed his point of view more than once, and all because of my argument.”
“Confrontation is good, but many people fear it.”
“They fear it because some are less than self-controlled when participating in it. Harsh words once said, Garrett, can never be taken back. It’s best to not speak out of anger. That has always been our rule.”
“I cannot imagine you ever being cross with Father. He can be a bear at times, but I’ve seen you endure his rantings with g
reat patience.”
“I am hardly perfect. We are not either one without our flaws, but we acknowledge that we will fail and make mistakes. That helps us not to expect the impossible from each other. But getting back to you and Mia, I think you should fight for her. I would very much love to see her a part of our family.”
He sighed. “I would too. Now, if I could just figure out how to approach her.”
“Just open your heart to her, Garrettt.”
He laughed. “I’ve already done that, Mercy, and she has taken full control.”
The next day Garrett thought to arrange a time to speak with Mia but learned that he’d come too late. She had gone with Prudence Brighton to spend the afternoon visiting friends. Feeling rather frustrated by this turn of events, Garrett drove to Rodney Eckridge’s office to share additional information he’d received on Jasper Barrill. They could no longer let the matter go untended.
“Apparently,” Garrett told Eckridge, “Barrill has caused trouble in more than one city. When I checked into his affairs in Boston, as I told you, the authorities had several charges against him. But something they mentioned caused me to write to the authorities in Baltimore. I just received word today.” Garrett offered the missive as proof.
Eckridge took the letter and began to read. “Goodness, man. Could this possibly be true? He’s suspected of murdering his own mother?”
“I know. The thought sickens me. Apparently there wasn’t enough proof to charge him, but the authorities have always been convinced of his guilt.”
“I feel completely duped. When he came to me for work, I presumed him to be an honorable sort. He showed the proper knowledge and skills for the job, as well as an air of social standing— not elite, of course, but certainly nothing of a criminal element. Plus there were references—I suppose now they were forged, but they suggested him to be a stellar employee.”
A Lady of High Regard Page 17