Now, though, it was time to shake himself free and get on with his life. A sense of purpose filling him, he whipped the towel off his hips and started dressing. As he dressed, he mentally made a list of all the single women in town. Since he was now footloose and fancy-free, he didn’t see any reason why he shouldn’t sample as many of those single women as he could.
Who knew, one of them might even stir his sexual desire and might even be interested in having a discreet affair. However, if one of them did, he would only indulge in an affair if she was experienced and did not ask for anything more. He didn’t have any intention of letting some woman trap him.
Suddenly, his head shot up, and he let out a mild curse. The conversation weeks ago slid through his mind. He remembered quite clearly his discussion with Kai over how couples snared each other into marriage. He smiled ruefully. It seemed he wasn’t as ignorant as he thought he was. Abruptly, his thoughts fled as the clock on the mantle in the parlor chimed the hour.
Hell, he’d better hurry or he would be late picking up Maryanne. If she was even slightly like Kai, she detested people being late.
* * * *
Kai declined all invitations out to supper since the night of the dance; however, today she accepted Rand Parkin’s offer. She stared at herself in the mirror and could tell by her reflection staring back that she looked wretched. It wouldn’t do at all, she mentally scolded herself. She couldn’t go out looking like this.
She needed to pull herself together. It had been her decision to break things off with River in the first place. She still felt devastated over what she’d done, and so many times since that fateful night, she’d nearly went to him and told him she’d changed her mind.
However, with dogged determination she held firm. Lord, it was hard and the pain in her heart grew nearly unbearable. Hopefully, soon it would ease and she would stop thinking and wanting to be with River. She hoped so, but she also held a strong belief that it would probably be a very long time before it went away.
Why did he have to make her choose? All she wanted was to be back in his arms again and feel them wrapped around her. Well, it wasn’t going to happen, so she might as well face up to the fact. Now, in a few short moments she would be going out with Rand. He was handsome enough, she enjoyed his company and she was determined to have a good time tonight no matter what.
Her chin lifted with resolution, and she felt pleased to see some life come back into her eyes. Yes, she would enjoy herself tonight and put all thoughts of River and how unhappy she felt out of her head. Squaring her shoulders, she moved away from the mirror, picked up her shawl and went down stairs to wait for Rand.
As she stepped into the parlor, she smiled when she saw her father looking at her in surprise.
John glanced up from his paper when he saw his daughter come in to the room. Seeing her all dressed up, he tried to hide his astonishment. “I didn’t know you were going out tonight, Kai.”
Kai stepped in to the parlor and sat down on the sofa. “Yes. Rand Parkin is taking me out to supper.”
John folded the paper and placed it on his lap as he stared steadily at his daughter. “I see. I didn’t know he’d asked you out.” He hoped it might have been River that she would be having supper with, and he sighed in disappointment.
“Yes, he asked me out when we met in the mercantile today.” She could only hope that her father did not notice that her voice didn’t hold any excitement.
John frowned in concern when he detected that his daughter didn’t seem to be too happy about going out with young Parkin. “Well, he’s a nice enough young man, and I’m sure you’ll have an enjoyable evening.”
Kai tried to smile brightly, but inside she didn’t feel anything but downhearted. Darn River. Why was he making her feel like this? She felt nearly as bad as when he’d gone away to school all those years ago. Well, she wasn’t going to let herself feel like this anymore. No, she wasn’t.
When the knock came at the front door she rose to her feet, moved to her father and bent down to kiss his cheek. “If I don’t see you when I come home, I’ll say goodnight now and I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Have a good time, dear,” John said and watched his daughter leave the room. Damn stubborn girl. He hoped she would get over her mulishness soon. Lord knew how long River would wait around for her.
With her mind set on only having a good time, Kai lifted her coat off the rack and pulled it on before she opened the door. “Good evening, Rand.”
Rand quickly removed his hat. “And good evening to you, Kai. I’m sure looking forward to our evening.”
Kai stepped outside and closed the door behind her. “I am too, Rand, so shall we go?”
Rand quickly replaced his hat, gently took Kai’s arm and led her across the porch and down the steps.
Already Kai could feel the strain of acting happy, but she was determined she would enjoy tonight. Come hell or high water, she intended to have a good time.
Chapter Twenty
Unable to believe who she saw as soon as she stepped into the hotel lobby with Rand, Kai wanted to scream in anger and jealousy when she saw River with Maryanne. Her eyes narrowed when she looked him over and she became even angrier at seeing how handsome he looked.
The darn rascal has no right to look so good while taking another woman out, she thought with intense annoyance.
Straight away River sensed Kai before he even turned around and saw her. His mouth compressed into a hard line. Damn it all, why did she have to turn up here of all places?
Hell and damnation, if he didn’t know better he would think she’d done it on purpose.
“Hi, Doc, Maryanne. Guess you’re both here for dinner as well,” Rand said and poked his head into the dining room. “Looks pretty crowded, only one table available. Might be a good idea if we shared.”
All Kai wanted to do was to hit Rand over the head for suggesting such a thing. The thought of sharing a table with River and Maryanne horrified her. She was about to suggest they go somewhere else when River spoke up.
“That sounds like a fine idea, Rand. So, ladies, shall we go in?” Even though River didn’t like the idea at all, what else could he do? Out of the corner off his eye, he could see Kai detested the arrangement, and that was the only reason he agreed.
“Oh, I was so hoping we could have supper alone, River. But as you say, the dining room is crowded.” Her mouth thinning in a tight angry line, Maryanne could not hide her disappointment or annoyance. She hated the idea of having to share a table with Kai, especially after what had happened at the dance between Kai and River.
Her teeth clenched with aggravation, Kai did not bother to argue, especially after what Maryanne just said. Well, since her night seemed to have already been ruined, why shouldn’t Maryanne’s, she thought with mounting irritation.
The waitress showed them to the only vacant table, and when Rand helped her of with her coat and into her chair, Kai adjusted her shawl. From beneath her lashes, she watched River help seat Maryanne and wanted to hit him for being so solicitous toward her.
“So how do you like being home again, Doc?” Rand asked after he sat down.
River did try to keep his eyes off Kai, but seeing how low-cut her gown was, he couldn’t stop his gaze from drifting to the creamy exposed flesh. Flesh he had touched and tasted too many times to count. When Rand asked him a question, he forced himself to pull his mind away from his carnal thoughts. “I’m very happy to be home. I always intended to come back and work with my father.”
Kai fiddled with her napkin and forced herself not to look at River, but hearing him speak she couldn’t help herself.
Maryanne reached out and placed her hand on River’s arm. “And we’re all pleased you did come back.”
It was hard to not shudder when Maryanne touched him and looked at him with such sexual hunger. River thought he just might become her next meal. However, he forced himself not to cringe away and returned her smile. “Why, thank you. No
w shall we order?”
After the waitress took their order, Kai found it nearly impossible to keep smiling when Rand leaned over and whispered about how pretty he thought she looked tonight.
River only wanted to toss Rand through the window behind him when he spoke intimately to Kai. Instead, he forced himself to pay attention to Maryanne. Lord knew what he talked about. He couldn’t remember a thing because the whole time he kept his gaze on Kai.
While she listened to Rand talk about something to do with cows, Kai forced herself not to pick up her fork and stab River with it every time he spoke to Maryanne. She could only feel relieved when their meal arrived.
“I haven’t seen you around lately, Kai, how have you been? And how is your father?” Annoyed, River was unable to stop himself in the end. He needed to talk to her even if it they only spoke of mundane things.
Nervously Kai swallowed the lump in her throat and met River’s direct gaze. “Fine. We’re both fine. Thank you for asking.”
“Really, you look a bit flushed to me. Sure you’re not coming down with something like a case of the miseries?” he said only loud enough so no one else at the table heard.
“I can assure you, I’m just fine,” Kai snipped back her answer in a harsh whisper.
“Really? You look like a woman who has a hot yearning.” Teasing her, River watched the flush on her face deepen even more.
Kai grew annoyed and only wanted to throw her dinner at him. “Why are you doing this?”
“What, talking to you? Well, if you prefer, I’ll talk to Maryanne.” River gloated and was pleased when noticing the anger light up her eyes. He knew then she wasn’t immune to him, and she was just being down right obstinate. “I know I have a yearning,” he whispered and smiled when her eyes darkened and filled with desire.
As always, Kai could feel the familiar heat and sensual pull this man held over her slipping through her veins like quick silver, and she was defenseless against it. “Is that why you’re here with Maryanne? Were you intending to ease your yearning with her?” She could not stop herself from asking. The jealously burned within her just thinking about it.
Well, I’ll be darned. The willful little hellion is jealous. Pleased with his observation, River couldn’t stop himself from grinning. “Why do you care? You don’t want me.”
Her face paling, Kai dropped her gaze. His words struck as if he’d slapped her. They devastated her and she couldn’t find her voice to answer him.
It was easy to see how his comment upset her and wanted to take her in his arms and apologize, but with the greatest effort he managed not to. He forced himself to turn his attention back to Maryanne.
After those brief words with River, it took her a great endeavor, but Kai somehow managed to pretend she was enjoying herself when inside she just wanted this horrific night to end. It became nearly impossible not to think of what River and Maryanne would do after they left the restaurant.
When the coffee arrived, Kai wondered if the horrendous night would ever end. She knew she’d treated Rand rudely, but she couldn’t help herself. Just watching Maryanne flirt with River made her heart rip apart and filled her with anguish.
“Are you all right, Kai? You’ve been awfully quiet tonight.” Rand said.
Kai wanted to clout Rand over the head for the second time that night. His question brought River’s and Maryanne’s attention. She forced a bright smile on her face as she turned to answer him. “I’m fine, thank you, Rand. Why don’t we finish our coffee and you can take me home?”
His mouth tightening, River’s jaw clenched, but he stopped himself from telling Rand to just nick off and take Maryanne with him. Instead, he remained quiet and drank his own coffee. She’d made her decision, he silently reminded himself and now they both would have to live with it. But he still didn’t like it, not by a long shot.
Chapter Twenty-One
Since her disastrous date with Rand, Kai spent the next day in her room. She lay despondently on her bed and stared up at the ceiling. It hurt tremendously seeing River paying attention to Maryanne, and she knew she could never stand to see him out with another woman again.
She slammed her eyes shut and squeezed them tightly together. Her breathing became painful, and her heart ached. She could not bear to think about what he and Maryanne had done after they’d left the restaurant, but it became impossible not to. With a soft sob she pictured River taking Maryanne in his arms and kissing her.
Another sob tore from her and, no longer able to keep the tears at bay, she rolled over on her side and wept into her pillow. The pain thundered through her like a destructive storm, ripping and tearing at her heart, leaving devastation and havoc in its wake.
Oh, why did she persist in seeing other men? Ever since River had come back into her life again, she didn’t enjoy the other men’s company as she once had. No, all she could think about was River and how she would rather be with him. Well, she had made a bungle of things and now it was far too late. River, it seemed, had already moved on. He was probably even searching right now for someone to take her place in his bed.
How could he treat what they’d shared so callously? Didn’t those intimate times in each other’s arms mean anything to him? She sobbed at how much it crushed her to think she meant so little to him. Oh, why did she have to be so foolish with her decision to date other men? Now she had lost River and could no longer deny that she still loved him.
She loved him with her whole heart, and the agony ripping through her was so much greater than the pain she’d suffered when he’d left to go off to school. No, this anguish tore, ripped and shattered her very soul, and she could only blame herself for the destruction. This time, she might never recover from its devastating force.
How would she be able to live here and know he would be making love to another woman? To know he would be giving himself and sharing such wondrous pleasure with someone else? No, she would never be able to bear such a thing, but she didn’t have any other choice.
She didn’t have anywhere else to go. Oh God, she couldn’t stand this. But she had to. She didn’t have any other option, and somehow she needed to find the strength to face the lonely and desolate future that lay ahead of her. She had to face the fact that River would find another lover and be lost to her forever.
She cried harder, knowing she’d foolishly thrown away the only man she would ever love, would always love.
* * * *
River huffed a breath and wiped a hand over his face in irritation. He stared into the flames of the fire. His date with Maryanne last night had turned into a fiasco, no thanks to Kai. Jealously and rage burned his gut when she’d left with Rand. It took every ounce of willpower to act politely toward Maryanne after that.
His mouth lifted in a sneer and he scoffed. His plan to kiss her died a quick death when they stood on the porch of her parents’ home. The light spilling from the parlor window shone on her face, and he could not miss seeing the calculating and predatory gleam in her eyes.
What he saw caused his instincts to kick in, and instead of kissing her as he planned, he forced himself to smile at her and bid her a hasty goodnight then quickly left. He knew now it would be pointless to date another woman or even try to find one to take Kai’s place in his bed.
Why, damn it? Why did she have to be so infernally mule headed? Wasn’t what they shared together enough for her? Why did she keep being so insistent in seeing other men? Surely, she could see they were meant to be together, that in all the years apart they’d never found anyone else to love.
How could he make the willful little witch realize the bond they shared would be for a life time? Somehow, he needed to find a solution to have her back. He doubted he could stand such a miserable existence for too much longer. With a frustrated growl rumbling in his chest, he jumped to his feet.
With his hands jammed in the front pockets of his pants, he paced before the fire and thought of how he could get Kai back and stop her from seeing other men. It wouldn
’t be easy. He knew firsthand how obstinate she could be. However, he could be just as immovable, and he possessed far more determination. He started making plans to win her back, and this time he would make sure he kept her.
He would use every dirty tactic he knew and learn new ones if he needed to, but one way or another he would have Kai in his arms and in his bed again. For a start, he would have to change his mind about dating other women. He stopped pacing and scowled into the fire. He definitely did not like the idea of seeing other women, but he knew Kai unquestionably didn’t like it.
Last night showed him how much she detested seeing him with another woman, but would it be enough to win her back? He pulled his hand from his pocket and combed his fingers through his hair. Hell, he hoped it would. He prayed it would not take her long to react. He shuddered at the thought of having to force himself to date other women.
Hell, why did Kai have to make things so damn hard and complicated? Why couldn’t she just realize they belonged together and stop all this foolish nonsense? He also knew that this time when she came back to him, he would not let her go. His plan to marry her in a few years would now change. He would find some way to talk her into marrying him, and as soon as possible he would make the arrangements for their wedding.
He would not take the chance of losing her again. Losing her now tore out his heart. If he lost her for good to another man, well, it would destroy him completely. No, this time he intended to tie her to him forever so he would never lose her again and suffer this horrendous pain shredding his heart.
Growing more confident with every minute that passed, he pulled his other hand free from his pocket and spun around. Striding toward the door, he snatched up his coat off the chair as he passed. He needed to get out of here and clear his head. Shrugging into his coat, he opened the door, stepped outside and shut it soundly behind him.
McPartland, Mysty - Playing Doctors and Nurses (BookStrand Publishing Romance) Page 8