“Why have you never married?”
“I’ve never found a man I could stand to live with who could also make me happy in the bedroom. In recent years I’ve met two men I’d have married in a heartbeat if they hadn’t been vanilla, but it wouldn’t have been fair to me or them to make a lifelong commitment under those circumstances. And, the truth is, I love my life and don’t need a man to be happy. If the right person comes along I’ll be thrilled, but if not then I’m still making a good life for myself.”
“You mentioned past life regressions, do you remember any past lives?”
Yes, but this was another question I didn’t want to answer. I opted to deflect instead of refusing, though. “Do you believe humans reincarnate?”
“Yes.”
“Have you met humans you recognized from one of their past lives? Someone you knew before?”
“Yes, I believe so.”
“Do you think you recognize me? Is that the attraction?”
“While something seems familiar about you, I do not at this time recognize you as someone from my past. I find myself pulled to the essence of who you are. Do not attempt to cheapen my attraction to you.” It was an order, but I let it go.
“And...” I hesitated, as I wasn’t sure I wanted to bring this up, but then decided I needed to see his reaction. “I’m someone you can’t control with your vampire powers, which I assume has your curiosity up? Makes me different? A challenge?”
“Tell me about the past lives you remember.”
Now he was trying to deflect instead of answer, and I reached for my tea again as I considered how to respond. I took a few sips, met his gaze, and said, “No. If you think you recognize me then tell me and we’ll compare notes. Or if you don’t want to influence my brain by putting suggestions in, then ask me where I was during a certain time period. Actually, I’ll do that for one time-frame now. Where were you around five hundred BC?”
“I don’t know dates that far back so much as I know what was going on in the cities when I was there. What was happening during this period?”
“Let me do some research and I’ll get back to you. I only know for sure what happened in one city, and I’d prefer not to divulge that just yet.”
“Would you be interested in doing a scene with me?”
The question seemed to come out of the blue and I was momentarily speechless. I knew nothing of his BDSM tastes, and being that he was nearly four thousand years old, somehow I doubted he put as much importance into the whole “Safe, Sane, Consensual” mantra as most modern day people in the lifestyle.
“Ummm, I don’t think so. Not yet, anyway.”
“You’ve played at play parties with people you’ve just met, correct?”
I pulled my legs under me, put a pillow in my lap, and fiddled with it. As soon as I realized I was fidgeting, I set it to the side and composed myself.
“Well, yes. But that’s different. I mean, people I know and trust vouched for them, plus some people I knew and trusted were watching. Also, there was no sex and often not even any touching of genitals — just flogging and spanking and clips and candle wax and that kind of thing. I don’t know anything about you or your history, I’ve never seen you at a club or play party and wouldn’t want to risk outing you by asking if anyone can vouch for you. Also, as old as you are, somehow I doubt you give as much weight to the whole safe, sane, and consensual creed as I, and on top of everything else, you’re a vampire with special healing abilities, and if you’re used to playing with vampires then playing with me could be detrimental to my health. Plus...” I hesitated and then rushed to get it out. “There’s another reason I have to be careful about partners.”
Damn, I was blushing. I hated having to talk about it, and I couldn’t believe I was telling him this now. I only told people I’d decided to scene with — was my subconscious trying to tell me something by blurting it out?
“Another reason?” he asked.
“Yeah, but I shouldn’t have mentioned it. If we decide to go forward at some later date then we can talk about it... Oh, don’t look at me like that. I shouldn’t have mentioned it, but I did, so I guess I should explain.”
I took a deep breath and talked fast. “My body makes really good endorphins, and I go exceptionally deep into subspace. Once you get me there, I can’t be depended on to safeword, even if damage is happening. I’ll beg for more, long past when my body’s had enough. The Top has to be especially careful once I’m flying, and that’s a lot of responsibility, so most don’t take me deep into subspace for the first eight or ten times we play — not until they know what I can and can’t take when I’m in my right mind, and not until they’re aware of what it takes to cause dangerous bruising.”
He nodded, let me know he understood, and segued into his next question without making me feel like a freak. “Speaking of bruising, I smell a good deal of damage to you right now. When did you last play?”
He smelled it? I pulled the throw pillow back into my lap and said, “It’s been a few days, and James gave me a pretty extreme session. I’m not always bruised as much as I am right now. This was one of those times he took me just beyond what I’m actually capable of handling, and he didn’t let me drop completely off into subspace to do it. He doesn’t make a habit of it, but does it enough to stretch my limits, so I can take a whole lot more now than I could handle nine or ten years ago when I first came under his care. I have to say it’s a bit disconcerting that you can smell bruising.”
He gave me a gentle smile. “To answer your concerns, I’ve been involved in the scene in other cities by other names, but my persona in Chattanooga isn’t suited for me to be publicly in the lifestyle. As I told you earlier, I need to move every so often or people notice I’m not aging, so I can’t give you references. I can tell you I’m well versed in the idea of being safe, sane, and consensual to start a relationship, though I prefer moving towards something closer to the idea of risk-aware-consensual-kink once trust is formed. I prefer the stoplight safewords, but if someone comes to me with their own safeword I honor it as well. I’ve had human companions who were twenty-four/seven slaves, and I’ve had others in my life who were sexual submissives but not slaves. I’m accustomed to scening with humans, and with my exceptional auditory and olfactory senses I have more ways than a normal Top to discern when a bottom may be in trouble. I pay attention to heartbeat, respiration, broken capillaries…I can perceive things a human Top isn’t capable of monitoring.”
Damn, that pretty much blew all my reasoning out of the water. However, as much as I wanted a scene with him, my instincts wanted me to wait, so I tried changing the subject again, “How does one get turned into a vampire?”
He raised an eyebrow, but answered without remarking on my change of topic. “It takes at least three bites on three consecutive days, though it’s considered much safer if one goes for at least ten days with a bite each day. On the final day the person is drained to the point just before death, and then they awaken a vampire a day or two later. If they haven’t risen on the night of the third sunset then they won’t. The maker generally drains the person, but it isn’t necessary. There are reports of human companions who get into car accidents and lose a lot of blood who awaken as vampires.”
“Is biting erotic for you?”
“It can be, yes.”
“It can be, or it usually is?”
“Depends on the vampire. In my case, it can be. Other vampires will give a different answer.”
“Is it intimate?”
“You have a knack for knowing which questions to ask,” he said with a gentle smile. “Yes, I much prefer my feedings to be intimate.”
I hesitated, making sure of my next words before I said them. I liked him, but I needed to take this slow. There were too many unknowns for me to just rush in. I looked up, met his gaze, and asked, “Can you humor me a little? Go on some dates, talk on the phone, get to know each other? Maybe kiss and make out a little? And then talk about whether we want to take things
to the next level?”
The next thing I knew, I was cradled in his arms, his mouth on mine, his lips firm with a soft touch, and his tongue divine — both commanding and gentle as he took possession of my mouth.
I tilted my head and he slanted his more. I knew he could hear my heart racing, and probably the blood pulsing through my veins, but I didn’t care. He’d earned my body’s response and I saw no need to hide it from him.
I hadn’t submitted yet, and I didn’t know what the rules might be if we entered into a formal agreement, so I took the opportunity to run my hands through his thick, silky hair. Thousands of years of practice had made Abbott a very good kisser, and I got lost in the sensations. When he finally pulled back, one of my hands was on his shoulder, the other still on the side of his head. His arms were both wrapped around my torso, but I wouldn’t have minded had he let them drift. God, I wanted him in that moment. If he could do this to me with a kiss, he might kill me with full body contact.
I leaned up and touched my lips to his again, taking in the fact his lips and tongue were cooler than mine, which felt odd. They weren’t cold, but not ninety-eight point six degrees, either. I tried to regain my composure as we pulled back, but soon realized it was going to take more than a few deep breaths.
Still a little lost, I lifted my hand to my mouth as I raised my gaze to meet his, and suddenly I wanted to jump him, wanted him to take me. I checked my shields to see if this was a vampire trick, but I couldn’t sense him in my head. Unsure of what was happening, I closed my eyes, rested my head against his chest, and relaxed into him. I could hear his heartbeat and realized it was beating exactly in time to mine. Interesting.
After a few moments I asked, “I take it this means you agree to the kissing and making out a little. Are you agreeable to the rest?”
His chest moved against my face as he laughed. “Yes, my darling, I’m agreeable to the rest. I have all the time in the world. We will proceed when you’re comfortable doing so, and not before.”
I decided not to argue against the “my darling” this time. Kind of hard to protest when I was relaxed in his arms. Instead I pulled back and said, “It’s been an enjoyable and enlightening evening, but I didn’t get much sleep last night and I should get myself into bed. Lauren has been invited to a slumber party Saturday night, if you’d like to ask me out on a date.”
I stood, took a few steps towards the front of the house, and he took the hint and came with me, holding my hand as we walked. “I was hoping for Friday night,” he said, “but Saturday could work.”
“Well then, I’ll look forward to seeing you Saturday evening. Feel free to call if you’d like to talk between now and then, and please either call or email me where we’re going, or at the very least the kind of dress appropriate for wherever it is you’re taking me.”
“And will you have safe calls set up?”
“Nope. I trust Aaron with my life and he tells me I’m safe around you.” Never mind I refused to have a scene with him. I wasn’t operating entirely on logic and was glad he didn’t point out my inconsistencies.
“Good to know,” he said as he gave me a gentle peck on the cheek and walked out the front door. “Pleasant dreams, my darling.”
Chapter Eleven
I try to keep my Fridays open for new patients, or old ones who just need a single appointment. It works out so at least once a month I manage a trip to Lauren’s school so I can have lunch with my daughter and her friends. My last appointment today was from ten thirty to eleven thirty, and I told Eileen she could leave when I buzzed him in.
At the end of the session I saw him out, and then went back to my office to shut down my computer and get my bag.
When I returned to the lobby two men stood near the door going out to the hallway, and they looked like bad guys — either someone’s muscle, or worse, a bad guy’s enforcers. Not that they were overly muscled, but observing their level of awareness, as well as the way they held themselves… I knew they were trained.
I slowly pulled energy in, a little with each breath. Aaron had told me to kill first and ask questions later, but I couldn’t. I hated killing people, and I never did unless it was me or them, in which case I chose for it to not be me. He’d known I’d ask questions first, and had likely told me not to in the hopes I wouldn’t ask as many questions.
“I’m sorry,” I told them in my best business voice, “but I’m closing up for the day. If you’d like to call back Monday then my assistant can set you up with an appointment.”
“We aren’t here for an appointment. We’ve been instructed to bring you to see our boss.”
Yeah, muscle. I wasn’t liking this but falling apart now wouldn’t keep me alive. “And who is your boss?”
“You wouldn’t recognize the name so it would serve no purpose to tell you.”
“Why does your boss want to talk to me?” I was beginning to run out of questions. How does one nonchalantly find out if people are here to just bring you in for a talk, or bring you in for a torture and murder session?
“Not our job to know, we’re just here to retrieve you.”
I decided to stop beating around the bush, and asked, “Do you intend to hurt me?”
The smaller one’s leering smile shot my adrenaline levels even higher. “Only if you don’t come with us willingly. Refusing would not be a good idea.”
He took a step towards me with the obvious intention of intimidating and scaring me, and my mind was made up — no way was I going with them without a fight. I wasn’t sure what they were, but they didn’t give off the energy of shifters, and it was daylight so they couldn’t be vampires. I assumed they were supernatural, which meant I didn’t have time to raise my hands since at this distance they’d get to me before I had a chance to aim and fire. So, it was exploding heads and a big mess.
I’d pulled in enough energy to blow up one head, so I’d have to take care of one guy and then quickly pull energy in for the second. The smaller guy had been doing the talking, so I assumed he was smarter and should probably be the first to go. I focused on the inside of his head as I brought even more energy in so I wouldn’t have to hesitate as long before taking the second out. The first guy’s head exploded within two seconds, and the other guy grabbed me as I started pushing energy into his skull.
I was forcing the energy into his head as fast as I could pull it in, but it wasn’t happening in my normal two seconds. He pulled me to him, paused as if trying to decide what to do with me, and slammed me to the ground with one hand as he gathered my arms behind my back with the other.
He gave the beginnings of a scream the instant before his head exploded and his body landed on me, and I dry heaved a few minutes, thankful I had nothing on my stomach to throw up.
He’d wrenched my shoulder and it hurt like a bitch, but I got up and took a few steps away from the bodies, if not the mess.
The putrid smell bothered me more than the sight, though both were horrid.
I can hold together in an emergency until the crisis is over, and then I fall apart. I was getting better at extending the length of what was considered an emergency so I didn’t go to pieces right as it ended and I could handle some of the cleanup. I needed to focus on the possibility this emergency wasn’t over, and someone might be in a car downstairs waiting for the dead guys to bring me down.
I took stock of the situation, made sure the door was locked, and called Aaron.
I gave him a rundown in as few words as possible, injecting no emotion into my report.
“How long until your next patient?” he asked.
“Monday morning, I was done for the day.”
“With their heads blown up, identifying them will be harder, but we’ll figure it out. Nathan’s closer and will be there before me.”
I reached into one of the men’s back pockets and pulled a wallet out. “At least one of them has ID on him.”
“I’ll be there as soon as I can. Are you a mess? Do you need me to bring you som
e clothes?”
“Clothes would be good,” I said, not looking down to see what kind of shape mine were in. The first guy’s brains were all over my front, the second guy’s brains plus what felt like a gallon or so of blood was on my back. I told Aaron, “I have brains all over me, but I’m ignoring it as long as possible. More pressing, though, there may be a driver somewhere wondering why they haven’t brought me down yet. I’d kind of like to have backup as quickly as possible, if you don’t mind.”
“Tyler and Ranger aren’t far away, I’ve already diverted them to you and they should be there within a few minutes. Nathan won’t be far behind and he’ll check the parking lot for a driver or to see if he can find a car that’s likely theirs. I’ll stay on the phone with you until Tyler and Ranger arrive.”
“How can I tell what these guys were? They weren’t shifters, or they didn’t feel like it, anyway.” I was using the speakerphone to try to keep my phone as brainless as possible, so my hand was free to reach up and explore the part of my face I was beginning to realize might be hurt. I grimaced in pain at the soft touch, and told Aaron, “He slammed me to the ground pretty hard, I have a feeling the side of my face will be bruised.”
“We’ll figure it out when we get there, and I’ll bring a cold pack along with clothes. Open the door, Tyler and Ranger are standing outside.”
That was fast. Had he put them somewhere close to me today, just in case? I opened the door, let them in, and locked it back. “Okay, they’re here,” I told Aaron, “I’ll let you go now.”
I touched my phone’s screen with my least gross finger to disconnect, and looked up at Tyler and Ranger. “I’d hug you guys but I don’t want to get brains all over you.”
Tyler spoke first, “Yeah, we’ll need to get the cleanup crew in here pretty quick, this is pretty disgusting, even for you. I’ll help you get undressed and wiped down; I have baby wipes and a trash bag. If you aren’t attached to that suit you’ll want to just throw it away.”
“Yeah yeah, I lose more clothes this way. When we find out who these guys’ boss is I should send him the bill for another suit.”
Only Human (Kirsten O'Shea Book 1) Page 11