by Tamsin Ley
Noatak gripped the wristband tighter. He wanted to smash the thing to smithereens, just to be safe. But Marlis’d complied with his request to disconnect. And she’d said something about a brain injury. “Can you get along without it?”
“I’ve had it since I was thirteen.” Her pretty throat flexed around a swallow, and her lips were a pale line.
He rubbed his forehead. Stop thinking of her as a woman and treat her like a soldier. Even good soldiers sometimes needed assistance. She’d trusted in the corp’ just like the rest of them, and her betrayal was real. That much he knew. But he didn’t know about her AI. “I need to have it checked out before I can give it back to you.”
She nodded and licked her lips. “What about contacting my sister?”
Could he blame her for wanting to be sure her family was safe? He’d do exactly the same thing. “I don’t want to censor you, but we need to be careful about information leaks. What would you tell her?”
A furrow appeared between Marlis’s eyebrows. “Fuck, she wouldn’t believe me, anyway. I just don’t want her to be caught unaware or punished because of my choices.”
He reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. “Didn’t you say your father and brother were also with the service?”
She looked stricken. “You think I might be a liability to this cause. That they’d be used as leverage against me.”
He squeezed her shoulder lightly, unable to stop himself from imagining what her skin might feel like beneath his palm. Ellam Cua, this woman is as addictive as stims. He forced himself to release his grip. “We all have things that make us a liability.” Like my failing ionic heart. “We just need to come up with something to tell them that won’t connect you to the resistance.”
She drummed the fingertips of one hand on the table. “They’re probably already wondering what happened to me.”
“We’ll work on a story together.” He held up the AI’s wrist band. “I’ll get this back to you as soon as I can. Meanwhile, consider yourself on probation.”
“Thank you for giving me a chance to prove myself.” She rose and held out her hand. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”
He took her handshake, marveling at the fine bone structure engulfed by his grip. The perfect woman dropped in his lap when he was least able to make her his. He could picture Ellam Cua, their trickster god, laughing at him right now. He released her sharply, trying to reign in his stupid feelings, and grabbed her duffel bag. “I’ll show you to your bunk.”
She picked up her weapons case and followed him down the corridor to the women’s bunk room where Emmy was waiting.
He left her there and headed for engineering to find Tovik. The young Denaidan wasn’t there, so he went to the med bay; if the kid wasn’t in engineering, he’d be with Joy. Too bad that scoundrel, Kashatok, had claimed her heart, or the kid might’ve had his first taste of love.
As Noatak rounded the corner toward the med bay, he heard them discussing flux modulators. The two sat cross-legged on the single bed facing each other, Joy’s legs covered by a sheet and her upper half in a medical gown. The screen behind her displayed her vitals in various colors.
Noatak frowned. “Aren’t you supposed to be resting?”
“I can’t, not when Kashatok’s not here.” She smiled sadly. Joy wasn’t what he’d call pretty, but when she smiled, he could see why Kashatok had been attracted to her.
“Maybe you and Tovik can tackle this together.” He held out the wrist band.
“What is it?” Tovik reached for it.
The AI’s voice rose from the band. “Please return me to Marlis immediately.”
Tovik raised his brows. “An AI?”
“My name is Twerp. I request your assistance returning me to my rightful owner.”
Joy shifted her attention to Noatak, brows furrowed. “I heard she had a breakdown. Is she okay?”
Twerp chimed in, “I must have physical contact with my owner to provide biometric feedback and guidance.”
Joy glanced from the AI to Noatak. “Um, Thank you, Twerp. But I was asking Noatak.”
Noatak shook his head. He’d never met a sentient machine, and he wasn’t sure he liked it. “Marlis is fine. Turns out she has her own reasons for wanting to get back at Syndicorp. You want to know more, you can ask her.” He pointed at the AI in Tovik’s hand. “Can you make sure that thing’s not bugged before I give it back to her?”
“I’ll get on it right now.” Tovik pocketed the device and stood up. “See you later, Joy.”
She smiled at him. “Bye, Tovik. Let me know if you need any help.”
The kid padded out of the room, his bare feet silent on the deck. Noatak remained, feeling uncomfortable as he looked at the monitor behind Joy’s bed. He should say something, but apologizing wasn’t his usual style.
“Don’t worry, I’m fine.” Joy stretched her legs beneath the sheets and leaned back against the pillow, closing her eyes. “It’s not your fault, you know.”
Given an opening, Noatak sat on the stool nearby. “I shouldn’t have left you alone.”
“I should’ve paid more attention.” She shook her head. “I thought the cartel would only be targeting Lisa. In hindsight, Whylon Station probably wasn’t the best choice for a meeting.”
Just then, Mek came around the corner into the med bay. “I just passed Tovik in the hall. He said Marlis has an AI. Is it a medical unit?”
“You’ll have to ask her. She mentioned having a previous brain injury.”
“Interesting. I’d like to check her out.” Mek looked toward the door as if intending to call her in this very moment.
Noatak’s throat felt suddenly dry as he imagined the doctor examining Marlis. Would he ask her to undress? He’d never before considered that Mek had an unfair advantage. Stop being possessive over something you can’t have. He forced himself to shrug and kept his gaze on Joy. “You’re the doc.”
“Should we keep her on the crew?” Joy asked.
“She’ll make an excellent crewman,” Noatak snapped back before Mek could respond. “And she saved your ass. I could use someone like her at my back.”
Joy chortled. “I think Noatak may have a crush on our new Weapons Specialist.”
He glared at her. “Appreciating a skilled gunman is its own thing.”
She scrunched her eyes in a snotty, little sister kind of smile. “Uh, huh.”
“Marlis’s brain damage would be an interesting study.” Mek tapped his forefinger against his chin. “I wonder if the nanites would repair her?”
The microscopic nano-computers were designed to alter brain structure and create something called cyber-sensitivity in humans—the ability to access computer systems remotely without any additional hardware. They were also the only thing that allowed the Denaidans to have mates. Noatak didn’t know whether to be excited Marlis might be the next candidate for the nanites or pissed. If she began the process now, someone else could end up bonding with her before his heart was fixed. “We only have one sample left, right? Maybe you should use it on a more steady patient.”
“The sample’s degrading quickly,” Mek answered. “We need to inoculate a new host as soon as possible. And in Marlis’s case, the nanites will be serving a dual purpose.”
“You still can’t get my samples to survive?” Joy asked.
“No matter what I do, when I separate them from your dendritic tissue, it corrupts their operating system. They become completely inert.” Unlike Lisa’s nanites, which had died off completely during her mating with Qaiyaan, Joy’s nanites had fused to her nervous system when she’d joined with Kashatok.
“We should at least wait to decide until Qaiyaan and the others get back,” Noatak said. “Let her meet the rest of the crew before she commits to something as serious as the nanites.”
Mek shrugged. “The longer we wait, the less viable the sample becomes.”
“If they come back with Doug, we’ll have all the samples we need,” Noatak a
rgued.
“And if they come back with nothing?”
The captains had gone to meet a black-market contact for information about the secret Syndicorp lab where Lisa’s brother, Doug—the original nanite test subject—was being kept. But they’d come back from previous meetings empty-handed. Mek’s sample might be their only hope for mates.
Pacing the short distance to the door and back, Noatak balled his hands into fists at his sides. He wasn’t ready for things to be moving so fast. “We don’t even know if the nanites will help her. They nearly killed Lisa.” He spun and thrust a finger in Joy’s direction. “And she’d be blind now if it wasn’t for the camera implant.”
“Calm down, iluq.” Mek made a calming motion with both hands. “We let the nanites grow too close to critical saturation in previous instances. Next time I plan to keep the host under constant supervision.”
The host. It sounded so cold. So clinical. When they’d first come up with the plan to hire women and inoculate them, it’d been tactical. A means to an end. Now that they were talking about Marlis, it had become personal. “This isn’t a Syndicorp test lab. You’re talking about a person.”
“Guys.” Joy tilted her head. “We haven’t even asked her yet. She could say no. Don’t get so riled up.”
Mek pursed his lips and gave Noatak a meaningful look. “I think she’s the best candidate right now, regardless of any extenuating circumstances.”
“Anaq.” Noatak blew out a breath and looked at a spot on the wall near Joy’s monitor. “Fine.”
They needed a host. He couldn’t deny it. The future of his entire race depended on it.
And unless Mek came up with a solution for his heart, Marlis would end up pairing with someone else.
Chapter Seven
Marlis had grown up sharing a room with her sister, but the accommodations on the Hardship were a little ridiculous—barely more than a walkway between two sets of bunk beds. Inside the lower bunk compartment on the right, Emmy’d hung a picture of herself with a golden retriever. A menagerie of tiny stuffed animals dotted her pillow, and several articles of clothing lay scattered over the blanket in the process of being folded.
Tossing her rucksack onto the bunk above Emmy’s, Marlis asked, “Do we have roommates?”
“I think we’re the only ones in here so far.”
Fewer names to remember would be good. She examined the compartment that would be her bunk. Two inset shelves took up the entire wall inside, yet seemed hardly adequate for her clothing, let alone any other gear. “Where can I stow my weapons?”
Emmy cocked her head. “They probably have a weapons locker to store guns.”
“I like to keep my weapons at hand.” Marlis thrust her rifle case across the mattress.
Rising from the bottom bunk, Emmy’s head barely cleared the top edge of the mattress. “Are you going to try to fit everything in here?”
“I keep my E-11 beneath my pillow. Maybe I can install a mounting bracket at the foot to hold Fanny.” Marlis stroked her MCS6 rifle.
“So…” Emmy cleared her throat. “Exactly how many gun fights have you been in?”
Marlis flushed. “That was my first, actually.”
Emmy widened her eyes. “Wow. You reacted so fast, I assumed you did that sort of thing all the time.”
“Thank you.” Marlis’s reflexes were the one thing her brain damage never seemed to adversely affect and the only good thing the recruitment trainer’d ever said about her.
“Do you think you killed Joy’s attacker?”
A vague recollection of a pulse blast leaving her gun in slow motion and connecting squarely with the posungi’s forehead intruded on her thoughts. Marlis’s throat felt unaccountably thick all of a sudden. Until the cantina, she’d only engaged in mock exercises, shooting at digital targets. Damn memory, only comes back at the worst times. She swallowed and answered, “I… I guess so.”
“Is that why you were upset in the galley?” Emmy put a gentle hand on her forearm.
“Not exactly.” She’d just told Noatak everything, and for the second time today she realized how odd it felt to be talking to people who didn’t already know what she’d been through. People who didn’t automatically categorize her as unfixable. If she and Emmy were going to be co-workers, bunk-mates, hopefully even friends, Marlis might as well tell her everything, just like she had with Noatak. “We’re all in the resistance together, so I guess it’s only fair you know.”
“Okay.” Emmy swept some scattered lingerie aside and sat on her bunk, looking up expectantly.
Wishing for Twerp’s reassuring buzz, Marlis thought, There is no danger. She sat on the bunk and leaned back against the footboard, pulling one knee up. As she related her time on Pulati, new memories cropped up, bits and pieces of detail she’d never dared voice. “My therapist kept asking if I was angry with my mother for failing to protect me. But all I recall is being happy Mom wouldn’t be on duty so I’d have her all to myself.”
Her voice cracked. Every inch of her body trembled and her hand itched for the comforting grip of her E-11.
Emmy reached behind her and pulled a stuffed unicorn from her pillow, dropping it onto Marlis’s lap. “Here.”
Marlis stared at the plush toy then back at Emmy. Did Emmy think Marlis was being a baby? “What’s this for?”
“I just noticed you were clenching and unclenching your hands. Sometimes having something to hold on to helps when you’re talking about stressful stuff. If you don’t want it that’s okay.”
“Why did you even bring these?”
“I’m sentimental, I guess, and I had room. They remind me of happier days.”
The plush toy did remind Marlis of how innocent she’d been before the trauma. Of a childhood that had been cut off too soon. Her breath shuddered as early memories crowded her thoughts. “Mom was trying really hard not to be a soldier so we could have fun.” Marlis felt a wistful smile tug the corner of her mouth. “She said someone else could police the universe for a few days and even joked with some of the troopers the morning before it all happened.” She looked up into Emmy’s eyes. “The same troopers who then shot her at point blank range and left me to die.”
Emmy gasped, eyes glistening with tears. “That’s awful.”
Marlis dug her fingers into the unicorn’s soft curves, wanting to rip it in half. “How could I forget that?”
“We’re told to trust troopers from the moment we can walk. And Syndicorp wanted you to forget. You’d probably be dead right now if you’d remembered.”
“You think these pirates can really mount a resistance? That there’s any hope of making Syndicorp pay for what they did?”
“I certainly hope so.” Emmy frowned. “Although I’m not sure exactly how I’m going to be able to help.”
“You did a great job patching up Joy.” The change in focus felt good, like the ship’s gravity had just lessened. “Maybe you can help the doctor?”
“I had to do a medical rotation for my psychiatric internship, but blood makes me woozy.” Emmy shuddered theatrically.
Marlis raised her brows. “Really? I never would’ve guessed. You did great.”
A knock at the doorframe drew their attention and Noatak leaned into the room. “Settled in?”
“I think so.” Emmy smiled at him and pointed to the bunk above their heads. “Although Marlis really could use some space for her extra guns.”
“I don’t have extra guns.” Marlis glanced at the unicorn in her lap and quickly thrust it back toward Emmy. “And Emmy’s not going to have anywhere to sleep with all these stuffed animals.”
Noatak’s gaze flickered over the unicorn before pausing on something near Marlis’s knee. A twitch of a smile lifted the corner of his mouth. She followed the direction of his gaze to a lacy orange pair of panties—definitely not trooper issue—but even though they weren’t hers, she flushed.
“You can each have a locker in the cargo bay for extra items.” His smile faded, and he
stepped back into the hallway. “Marlis, do you have a few minutes? The doc would like a word with you.”
“The doctor? Why?” Did this have something to do with her breakdown in the galley? Damn it all if she’d disqualified herself from yet another job.
Noatak rubbed his temple. “He saw your AI. Wants to talk to you about it.”
Twerp. Even when she wasn’t wearing it, the AI was a source of trouble. Swallowing, she nodded and slid out of the bunk. Shooting a worried smile at Emmy, Marlis followed Noatak down the corridor to a small med bay.
The doctor sat on a stool inside, his back to the door as he scrolled through computer files. He must’ve heard their approach because he swiveled to greet them. “Marlis. I’m so glad you’re here.” He patted the exam table. “Please, sit.”
Moving forward, she perched on the foot of the bed, facing the doctor. She’d been through so many physical exams, it almost felt like home again. Except that Noatak remained stiffly just inside the door. Was he worried about her? Although he’d basically said she was on probation, he seemed to want her on the crew. Hopefully he was sticking around as an advocate, especially since she couldn’t for the life of her remember the doctor’s name.
“Are you familiar with nano-bots?” the doctor asked.
“Sure,” she answered with a shrug. “Itty-bitty computers, right?”
“Has anyone mentioned that humans and Denaidans cannot engage in sex?”
“Uh, okay. Good thing that’s not what I’m here for.” She found her gaze sliding toward Noatak near the door. She had no idea where this conversation could be going. Was her brain damage getting worse? She reached for her wrist, seeking Twerp’s comforting presence. Gone. “I thought you wanted to talk to me about my AI.”
Noatak made a grumbling noise and took a small step into the room. “Mek’s doctoring ability is far better than his conversational skills. He’s trying to say he thinks he can fix your brain damage with nanites.”
“The same technology that makes a human a compatible mate for our kind,” Mek added, as if that was the most important part of this conversation.