by Andrew Price
Corbin’s eyebrows shot upwards. “‘Back to my place’? I thought the date ended in disappointment?”
“I’m sure it did, but the goodbyes didn’t happen until after the evening’s less-clothed festivities concluded. At least, that’s what the grapevine says. I take it she left that part out of the version she told you?”
Just then, Molly appeared at the door. It was obvious she’d heard the entire conversation. Corbin’s face flushed with embarrassment.
“I thought I heard your roomie?” she said.
“Uh, no. He’s at the front office,” Corbin replied uncertainly.
“You know, I haven’t seen him all day?” Theresa interjected.
“He’s been busy. He should be along any second.”
“Uh huh,” Molly said, though her tone left no doubt she didn’t believe this. “Corbin, I’d like to see you for a moment, if you can break yourself away. It won’t take more than a few seconds. T, you can talk amongst yourselves while he’s gone.” Molly stepped back into the hallway.
Theresa snarled her lips. “How did your date end, Molly?!” she called out.
“It ended well. How did yours end?” Molly countered, as she walked off.
“What date?” Theresa said to herself. She hadn’t had a date in some time. Suddenly, the puzzled expression on her face twist into rage. Her forehead creased and deep wrinkles appeared under her eyes. Her teeth visibly clenched and her nose flared. She now got Molly’s point.
“You started it,” Corbin said without sympathy.
Theresa squinted at Corbin. “Can I tell you something?”
Corbin looked at Theresa suspiciously. “Ok.”
“You can’t ever tell her or you and I are finished, got it?”
Corbin agreed.
“I was a lot like her when I was younger. No guy was ever good enough, and I made it very difficult for. . .,” she paused. “Well, that’s all I’ll say.” But she continued: “Let me tell you! There are a lot of women out there who would be grateful to get as many dates as she gets. She makes the rest of us look bad,” she grumbled before slipping off the end of the desk and heading for the hallway. “You know where to find me.”
Alvarez walked to the coffee shop where Beckett had set up shop. Alvarez looked harried, but Beckett looked quite comfortable sitting in a recliner near a small table. The duffel bag lay at his feet.
“You were supposed to wait for me outside the bank. I don’t like having to find you.”
“I told you I’d wait for you here. Besides, standing outside the bank looks suspicious. Did you get it done?”
“Of course I got it done.” Alvarez pulled the bank documents from his pocket and handed them to Beckett. “Have you figured out if any of the other documents are screwed up?”
“They’re fine. It’s just the one sticker.”
“You better be right.”
Beckett pulled another wallet and cell phone from the duffel bag. “The next bank is inside this building, out that door and down the hall.”
Alvarez pulled off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “These things are killing my eyes. I don’t know how people go through life wearing them.”
“They make you look like Mr. Magoo.”
“I’m not wearing them for fashion.”
“That’s a relief. Whose are they?” All morning, Beckett kept asking questions like this, little questions which would give him more insight into Alvarez’s life than Alvarez wanted to share. Alvarez immediately became cross.
“Does it matter?! They’re not mine!”
“Calm down.”
“Fuck you.” He replaced the glasses. “After this, I’m taking a break for lunch.”
“Fine. I’ll meet you at McDonalds. It’s up the street, on the corner. You can’t miss it.”
A few minutes after Theresa left Corbin’s office, Molly reappeared at Corbin’s door. “She’s not very good at this, is she?” Molly asked with a laugh.
“I’m not taking sides. I do wish you two could get along though.”
“No chance of that. Here’s your mail by the way, that’s why I wanted to see you. Stuart gave it to me by mistake.” Molly handed Corbin several envelopes of varying shapes and sizes. She looked toward Beckett’s desk. “So where is your playmate really?”
“Am I my playmate’s keeper? What do you care anyway?”
“I don’t. Do I look like I care?” Molly made a show of nonchalantly flipping through a file she was holding.
“Then why did you ask?”
“Because I’m a nice person, and I’m trying to make you feel better about yourself by feigning interest in your life.” Her good mood had returned. “I’m that ray of sunshine that makes your life worth living.”
Corbin smiled despite himself. “But you’re not feigning interest in my life, you’re feigning interest in Beckett’s life!”
“Beggars can’t be choosers. Take what you can get, partner.”
Corbin laughed. Usually, he and Molly followed the unwritten rule that neither would laugh at the other’s verbal jabs, but this one struck Corbin as particularly funny. “All right, you win. Forget I mentioned it.”
“No need to forget, I wasn’t listening anyway.”
Alvarez pushed open the door to the McDonalds and headed straight for Beckett. Over his shoulder, he saw the police officer enter the McDonalds, the same officer who followed him from the bank. Alvarez even changed his pace twice, hoping to elude him. Yet, here he was. Upon reaching Beckett’s table, Alvarez all but tossed the wallet and paperwork at him.
“Is he coming this way?!”
Beckett looked around Alvarez. “Who?”
“The cop.”
Beckett looked again. “No. He just sat down two tables behind you.”
Alvarez breathed a sigh of relief.
“Wait a minute! Are you saying you thought a cop was following you? And you came right to me and threw the incriminating evidence at me, like some punk throwing his gun out the window when the cops start chasing him?”
“Fuck off.”
“Fuck off?! I’ll tell you—” Beckett stopped mid-sentence as the officer rose from his seat. “Shit! Your friend stood up.” Beckett jammed the wallet into his back pocket.
“What’s he doing?”
“He’s talking to the woman behind you.” Beckett folded the paperwork and slipped it into the duffel bag without taking his eyes off the officer. “Now he’s sitting down at her table.”
Alvarez’s shoulders slumped. “I feel sick.”
Corbin looked at the food before him. The meal was planned perfectly to appear on the receipt as if two people were eating. When he first arrived, he sat in the bar and ordered a beer and meal-sized plate of nachos, both of which he abandoned when he moved to a table. After moving to the table, he ordered a Coke, a tuna melt with vegetables instead of fries, and a side order of onion rings. He finished it all off with a coffee and two cookies. To disguise the fact he didn’t eat most of the food, he cut everything into small pieces and piled the dishes on top of each other. He shoved the cookies into his pocket.
Today’s waitress was Alice. Not coincidentally, Alice served Corbin and Beckett the day before as well. Corbin learned months prior how to choose a waitress by asking to be seated in particular sections. Using this method, he chose Alice both as a waitress and an alibi.
“Where’s your friend?” Alice knew both Corbin and Beckett. In fact, they tipped well enough that all the staff knew them.
“He’s back at the office trying to finish some project. Tomorrow is his last day.”
“Aw! We’re going to miss him! Is he coming tomorrow?”
“As far as I know.”
“Remind me, I’ll get him one of the birthday cakes.”
“Chocolate, yellow or other?” Corbin raised an eyebrow.
“It’ll be a surprise!”
“Great, he loves surprises.” Corbin handed her Beckett’s credit card to pay the bill. She never noticed. One well
-practiced forgery later, Corbin was on his way to the next restaurant.
The lunch crowd packed the counter. Alvarez and Beckett stepped into one of the lines, though it was more of a cluster or a rabble than a line. Alvarez kept looking over his shoulder at the officer, prompting Beckett to tell him to “stop acting like an asshole” and “face forward.” Eventually, Alvarez found himself with only one customer between himself and the counter, but this customer was having problems ordering.
“I’m not sure what I’d like,” said the customer, as he stared at the menu.
“What the fuck?!” Alvarez said to himself, but loudly enough that everyone nearby heard. “Buddy, can you get a move on? I’ve got to get back to work.”
Beckett tapped Alvarez’s back. “Let it go.”
“Miss, what comes on the Big Mac,” the customer asked, ignoring Alvarez.
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Alvarez exclaimed.
“Stop,” Beckett scolded him.
“What?! Why should I?” Alvarez turned to face Beckett. “What kind of fucking moron doesn’t know what they put on Big Macs! It takes a real Goddamn idiot to be confused by the McDonalds menu. Monkeys know this menu! Children can recite it at birth!”
“Calm down,” Beckett hissed under his breath.
Alvarez ignored Beckett and continued his rant. “He had ten frickin’ minutes to figure out what he wanted, but he waited until he got to the counter to look at the menu? That’s disrespect,” he said loudly, though he spoke to no one in particular.
“Shut the hell up,” Beckett grunted through gritted teeth, motioning toward the officer with his eyes.
Alvarez took a deep breath, like a bull snorting as it makes up its mind whether or not to attack. As he looked around, he slowly realized everyone was staring at him. “Bah!” Alvarez tossed his hands into the air and turned to face the counter.
“You’re an idiot,” Beckett whispered to Alvarez.
“Don’t start with me,” Alvarez warned Beckett over his shoulder.
A few miles down the road from Fiddeja’s, Corbin ordered the same meal Alvarez ordered every day: the fish and chips platter with a Coke. It didn’t look appetizing, but then, he didn’t plan to eat it. Corbin dumped the meal into a nearby bus tray and called the waitress over. He handed her Alvarez’s credit card. She promptly returned.
“I’m sorry sir, but this card expired.”
“What?” Corbin stared blankly at the waitress.
“It’s expired.”
Corbin cursed Alvarez under his breath. “I had no idea, I’m sorry.” Corbin pulled out his wallet. Fortunately, he had enough cash that he didn’t need to risk using one of his own credit cards. “So much for your alibi, Vez. . . dumbass.”
Alvarez had unwrapped his burger by the time Beckett made it to the table, the same table they sat at before. Owing to the size of the lunch crowd, this was the only available table in the entire restaurant. Unfortunately, the police officer still sat only two seats away, although he was distracted by the woman in the low-cut sweater.
“What the hell was that about,” Beckett whispered across the table.
“You heard me, who does that guy think—”
“Listen very carefully,” Beckett said, cutting him off. “You need to avoid being noticed. Picking a fight in a McDonalds in full view of fifty people is not keeping a low profile.”
“I know that.”
“Then don’t do it.”
“Shut the hell up!”
“Stop drawing attention to yourself,” Beckett ordered. He leaned back and took a deep breath. As he did, the wallet he had so hastily jammed into his back pocket earlier fell out onto the floor behind him. He didn’t notice. He leaned toward Alvarez again. “If you aren’t more careful, you’re going to make a mistake, and that’s going to get us caught.”
Alvarez didn’t respond.
“If you can’t calm down, then we need to stop this ride right now.”
Alvarez rubbed his temples. “Stop talking about it! I just need a break.” Alvarez picked up his burger, but put it down again without taking a bite. “This is really stressful, and you’re not helping. Plus, I’m getting a headache from the glasses.”
“Don’t blame me for your nerves. Corbin said you were solid. He didn’t tell me you were a nut.”
“Yeah well, Corbin warned me you were a pain in the ass, but he didn’t tell me you were King of the Hemorrhoids.”
“You want to quit this right now?!”
“Don’t be an ass. We started this thing, we finish it. . . I just need a break for a few minutes.” Alvarez stared out the window. “Talk about something else.”
“Nice weather today. I’m glad it’s not super hot yet.”
Alvarez continued to stare silently out the window.
“You know, Philly’s not a bad city if you don’t mind the endless construction, the dirt, and the crime. Crime! Now that’s ironic!” Beckett laughed.
Alvarez picked up his fries, but set them down again without eating any.
“Now Baltimore, that’s an ugly city. You’re from Baltimore, right?”
Alvarez jolted back to reality. Corbin warned them not to discuss their backgrounds, but Beckett kept prying all day. “Am I supposed to answer that?!” Alvarez demanded.
“Don’t be so touchy. I’m just making conversation.”
“Do you want my social security number too?! How about my mother’s maiden name?!”
“It was just a question. No harm intended.”
They sat in silence for several minutes. Alvarez still didn’t eat.
“Are you going to eat or should we get back to it.”
Alvarez looked at his burger. “Let’s get out of here.”
They packed up their trays before Beckett lifted the duffel bag over his shoulder. He followed Alvarez to the door. Neither noticed the wallet lying on the floor behind them.
“Lose something?” Molly asked from Corbin’s doorway. Her feet were spread as far apart as her tight skirt would allow, and she tossed an orange back and forth between her hands as if she were juggling.
“Like what?”
“Your roomie, perhaps? Where’s Becks?”
“I don’t know. He’s in high demand today, like a hooker at a cattleman’s association ball.”
“That’s lovely.”
“I thought so.”
Molly drifted toward Beckett’s desk. “It’s funny I haven’t seen him all day.”
“That’s not funny. Wanna hear something funny?”
“What?”
“What do you do with an elephant with three balls?”
“Walk him and pitch to the rhino. Why haven’t I seen him all day?”
“I don’t know, how’s your vision?”
“You know what I think?”
“Does anyone?” Corbin asked.
“I’m thinking he didn’t even come to work today. Did he?”
“That would be quite a surprise to the people who’ve seen him.”
“I’m supposed to take their word for it?”
Corbin chuckled. “You’re right, this could all be some vast conspiracy to give him a day off. What exactly do you think he’s doing if he’s not here?”
“You tell me, you’re his accomplice.”
Beckett and Alvarez stood on the steps of a post office, arguing over the map.
“I’m telling you, we need to go back down this road and over one,” Beckett said, pointing to his right.
“No, you’re wrong. We need to go this way, and over one in that direction,” Alvarez countered, pointing to the left.
“Let me see the map, I’ll show you.”
“I know how to read maps.”
“Apparently, you don’t.”
Alvarez pointed toward a glass building. “That’s the IACC Bank. That’s the direction we need to go.”
“No, that’s the back of the bank.”
“If you’re so sure, why don’t you walk over there? Then you can
meet me at the next bank after you realize you’re wrong.”
“Why don’t we ask someone?”
“And ruin that low profile you keep whining about?” Alvarez asked snidely.
“Ok then, let’s keep arguing in the street, because that doesn’t look suspicious.”
“Let’s flip a coin. That’s the best way to solve this.”
Beckett laughed. “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve heard today.”
“All right, how do you want to resolve this?”
Beckett paused to consider. “I’ll flip, you call.”
Alvarez won the toss. “Good. This way.”
“Oh look, there’s a CVS on the way. We can stop and get your valium refilled.”
“Keep it up and we’ll be stopping for bandages.”
Corbin picked up the telephone. It was time to call Beckett’s house. By pure chance, Beckett’s wife was at a parent-teacher conference right now, so Corbin wouldn’t need to pretend to be a solicitor. Instead, he could let the answering machine record silence. Corbin entered the number from Beckett’s phone card and then Beckett’s home phone number. The machine answered. Corbin placed the receiver on mute and waited until the line disconnected. As far as the phone company records were concerned, Beckett just made his daily call home.
Of all the bank managers Alvarez encountered, he liked none less than this one. This guy was a jerk. He checked and double checked everything, he made photocopies and more photocopies, and he made snide comments throughout. At first, he seemed decent enough, until he learned Alvarez was only depositing $100. From that moment on, the man delighted in taking shots at him. Alvarez even tried to soften him up by suggesting he would deposit a large sum in the coming week, but this just increased the man’s animosity.
“I see” – the man dismissed everything Alvarez said with the phrase “I see” – “We do get a large number of Penn kids in here who have their parents send them money from overseas.”
“It’s my money, not my parents’.”
“I see. Will you be needing checks?”
“Yes, I’d like checks.”
“You do know there is a fee for those checks?” the man added drolly.