by C. J. Archer
“I, uh…the betrothal will be broken of course,” Enderby blustered. “My name cannot be linked to Hawkesbury’s now that we know he comes from stock that would dare harm Your Gracious Majesty—”
“Very well,” the queen said with a wave of her hand. “He is free to marry Lilly Blakewell if he still desires the union. And if he is found not to have been involved in his father’s crimes.”
Enderby looked relieved. Lilly exchanged a glance with her mother. Leo could see they were both trying hard to contain their smiles. Neither seemed to doubt that Hawkesbury would be released.
It was time to put the final nail in Enderby’s coffin and give Lilly something to really smile about. “Your Majesty,” Leo ventured, “I am not so sure the previous Earl of Hawkesbury was involved in any plots. The letter Lord Enderby used to blackmail Lord Hawkesbury proves no such thing.”
Enderby’s jowls shook. “What!” he bellowed. “It certainly does. I saw it with—”
The queen lifted a hand and Enderby fell silent although his cheeks and chins continued to wobble. “Explain yourself, Lord Warhurst,” she said.
Leo produced a piece of paper from his doublet pocket. “This is the original letter. It’s in code but when deciphered, it clearly states something entirely different to what Lord Enderby is suggesting.”
She took it, scanned the writing, then handed it to Walsingham. While he positioned a pair of spectacles on his nose, she nodded at Leo. “How did you decode it?”
“I, uh…” Damnation, he needed to think of an excuse fast. To admit he learned the code from Grayshaw would give credence to the cur’s story that he’d seen a letter containing treasonous information implicating Hawkesbury. They needed to avoid that and discredit him as much as possible.
“I did it,” Blake said. “We use codes all the time at sea. This one wasn’t terribly difficult to decipher.”
The queen glanced sharply at Walsingham. He squinted over the top of his spectacles at her. “That’s why it’s no longer used, Majesty.” Walsingham shook the letter. “This is an old code. It went out of use years ago.”
“Then it would be authentic?” Her Majesty asked.
He nodded and scratched his chin beneath his beard as he studied it again. Eventually he sighed and shook his head at Enderby.
Enderby’s eyes widened, a hint of doubt in them. “But it points directly to Hawkesbury! His name is mentioned.”
“Indeed it is,” Walsingham said. He folded the letter and handed it back to the queen. “But there’s nothing of a treasonous nature in it, merely a scandalous one.”
The queen leaned closer. “Oh?”
“The message says old Hawkesbury had a mistress, a widow who is no longer with us but had quite a reputation, I believe. It suggests the affair be kept secret from Lady Hawkesbury.”
“What?” Enderby shouted. He held out his hand for the letter. The queen ignored him. “It says no such thing! Why in God’s name would I keep a letter about Hawkesbury’s bloody mistress?”
“Because you knew you could use it against the current Lord Hawkesbury,” Leo said. “His lordship is a proud man and cares deeply for his mother. He wouldn’t want her to learn that her husband kept a mistress. It would upset her. He was willing to agree to marry your daughter in exchange for your silence. Am I right?” Out of the corner of his eye, Leo saw Lilly staring open-mouthed at him. His mother frowned.
“No!” Enderby clasped his hands and went down heavily on one knee. “Your Majesty, this is false! The note I had in my possession and which Warhurst stole from me clearly stated the late Hawkesbury was a traitor. You must believe me, I—”
“This is the letter you used to blackmail a peer of the realm,” Leo said. “After all, I’m sure you would never keep a document pointing to treason from Her Majesty’s agents.” He tilted toward Enderby, who was slowly heaving himself to his feet. “That would make you a party to treason too.”
Enderby rocked back on his heels. He glanced from Leo to the queen and Walsingham and back to Leo. He was trapped. He could not admit to withholding important evidence any more than he could admit to blackmailing Hawkesbury. Enderby had caused his own downfall, with a little help from Leo’s own skill at writing in code.
The silence in the chamber stretched to a snapping point as the queen and Walsingham both waited for Enderby to answer the accusation. In the end, he swallowed hard then bowed.
“I’ll send a message to Lord Hawkesbury releasing him from any obligation to wed my daughter.” He spoke quietly, his head tilted back, his chins thrust out. “It will be waiting for him upon his return home.”
The queen dismissed him and he almost ran from her chamber, but not before he gave Leo a poisonous glare. Once the door closed on his back, Lilly released an audible breath. Leo felt like he could suddenly breathe too.
The queen turned to Walsingham and simply raised an eyebrow. He bowed his head. “My man gave me false information, it would seem. He shall be punished.”
Leo hoped Grayshaw’s punishment wouldn’t be too painful. All the anger he felt toward him had dissipated along with his fears that he would be thrown into the Tower alongside Hawkesbury. Grayshaw wasn’t a bad man, he was simply driven by a need to rise. Leo could understand that.
“Poor Lady Hawkesbury,” the queen said, tearing the letter in half. “She’s such a gentle lady and she was deeply in love with her husband. She must never know of his betrayal.” They all nodded. The queen handed the torn paper to one of her servants. “Have Lord Hawkesbury released immediately,” she said to Walsingham. “He’s such a charming man and so handsome. I knew the charges must have been false. He couldn’t possibly think ill of me.”
Walsingham nodded, apparently unperturbed by her change of heart. “I’ll see to it at once, Your Majesty.” He rose and began a slow, awkward walk to the door.
The queen held out her hands for Lady Warhurst and Lilly, who went to her immediately. Lilly sat on the cushions near the queen’s golden slippers. Leo thanked God his sister’s condition was not yet showing. He wasn’t sure if the virgin queen would be so considerate if she knew Lilly wasn’t the virtuous girl she thought her to be.
“I expect he will ask you for your hand now,” she said to Lilly.
Lilly blushed and bowed her head. “It would be my dearest wish,” she said demurely. Leo smiled and caught his brother’s wicked glance. Their sister was as good an actor as any of Lord Hawkesbury’s Players. Demure she was not.
The queen spoke of the pending nuptials then dismissed her subjects. They left through the audience chamber, even more crowded than before, and endured the same whispers and taunts. Leo didn’t care in the least. Alice may have been a seamstress but she was better than all of them. Kinder, cleverer, lovelier. He liked being with her. Her practical mind and her biting wit brought brightness into his life. A brightness he needed and desperately wanted.
Wanted but could not have.
The thought struck him hard in the chest. He did not want to be without her, not for a moment and certainly not for the rest of his life, yet he could not marry her. He was a Warhurst. His people depended on him. He needed to finance those mines, needed the very men who sneered at him and their money.
He paused and, ignoring the leaden weight pressing down on his heart, turned the smoothest smile he could muster on a group of influential gentlemen nearby.
But he did not get a chance to attempt to sway them to his cause. The queen, once more sitting on her magnificent throne, spoke first.
“My Lord Warhurst,” she said in that clear, concise voice that instantly silenced the room. “You must be sure to send some of your coal to warm my palaces in winter.”
No one spoke but Leo could sense the change in the audience chamber. The prickly chill thawed. Courtiers edged closer to him, their smiles conciliatory. He could almost see the apologies and excuses forming on their lips.
“I will be honored to send you my first yield, Your Majesty,” Leo said and bowed.
She nodded in dismissal, and while she didn’t smile, there was mischievousness in her eyes. She knew her simple words, spoken as if in afterthought, would change his life.
Their effect was immediate. People clapped him on the back, shook his hand, and tried to broker deals. By the time he managed to get away, he’d secured five investors. The power of the queen’s favor was enormous.
Outside, he joined his family and headed home. They congratulated him on his good fortune, although his mother was cautious. “They’ll likely still talk about you behind your back,” she said. “Does that bother you, Son?”
“Not at all,” he said. It was the truth but it had crept upon him slowly and had only now fully sunk in. Alice. He could be with her. Scandal be damned. He felt so much lighter, freer. Everything felt so clear and right.
His mother smiled and breathed a heavy, contented sigh. “So it’s true? You will marry the Croft girl?”
“I will.”
“It would seem all my children are to be happily wed. It’s a mother’s greatest wish.”
“You have Leo to thank for that in Lilly’s case,” Blake said, bringing his horse alongside theirs. “Good work by the way, Brother. I didn’t know codes were a specialty of yours.”
“Aha!” Lilly cried, then softer, “You gave her a false note.” She giggled into her hand. “Leo, I never knew you to be so devious.”
“It is unbelievable,” Blake joined in. “So much for being the honest one among us.”
“I still am,” Leo said, “but that’s only because you and Lil are so wicked. You’ll always make me look good.”
“Where is the real letter?” their mother asked.
“Destroyed,” Leo said.
“Good. The information within it must never come to light.”
“It won’t.” He must go to Alice and tell her Lilly’s news, and his own. Tell her he needed her with him, always. But first he would return home and change into something less elaborate. He hated court clothes with their gaudy embellishments. There was nothing practical about them.
They arrived at the Dowgate Street house and Greeves handed him a single sheet of parchment. “From Mistress Croft,” the steward intoned.
Leo unfolded it and read.
Lord Warhurst,
I apologize for the written message but I could not face you. I want you to know that I understand why you said what you did at Lord Enderby’s and it is very much appreciated. However, I will not hold you to a proposal made under duress. Indeed, I have come to realize marriage to you is not what I want. I do not care for you enough. While your parting words hurt at the time, I now understand why you spoke so cruelly, and I do not blame you. You did what you thought was right, just as I must now do what is right and release you from an obligation you cannot keep and I have no desire to accept.
I extend my good wishes to yourself and your family.
Regards,
Alice Croft
He dropped the note and ran out of the house.
Alice thought writing the letter would make her happier. It didn’t. Quite the opposite. She felt like she was being eaten away inside, first her heart and then the rest of her so that there was nothing left but a hollow shell. It was a miracle she didn’t flop to the floor, boneless. It was a double miracle that she didn’t cry.
She had the players to thank for that. They were preparing for a performance of The Fantastical Life and Loves of Barnaby Fortune when she walked into the Rose Theatre’s tiring house. Her distress must have been obvious because all activity ceased.
Best to tell them all at once and end speculation before the whispers began. “There will soon be rumors circulating about a lord marrying a seamstress,” she said, gathering herself together. “The rumors are referring to Lord Warhurst and myself and I can assure you, they are false.”
Roger Style swept past her in a puff of powder he was using to whiten his hair. “Can’t say I’m surprised,” he muttered.
His brother, Edward, winced and mouthed an apology. Henry gave her hand a sympathetic squeeze and kissed the top of her forehead. “I suspect there’s a story behind this.”
She nodded. “A long and sad one.”
“Don’t know why you think we would have believed the gossips,” Freddie said from across the room. “He’s a bloody duke or something, isn’t he?”
“Baron,” Will said. “And shut up, Freddie, no one’s interested in your opinion.”
Freddie made a rude gesture with his fingers and tongue. “Come and get drunk with me after the show,” he said, winking at Alice. “We’ll have a bit of fun.”
Her father pointed a needle at him. “She’ll not go anywhere with you. Style, are you going to tell your apprentice to behave or do I have to put sand in his hose again?”
Style sighed then began to berate Freddie, listing all his faults. It continued for some time.
Will handed Alice a sewing kit. She looked down at the cape she was supposed to be mending and wanted to cry. Just when she thought her days of mending for others were over, here she was back at the beginning again.
“Marriage is not an endeavor to enter into lightly,” Will said. He rubbed the back of his hand across his high forehead and appeared to be warring with himself over something. After a long pause, he said, “I, uh, have a wife. She lives in our village with our three children.”
“Three! Good lord, Will, you kept that close to your chest.” She’d thought him a single man. He’d not once mentioned a family.
His smile was sheepish. “My friends know.”
She couldn’t help smiling a little at that because it meant he now numbered her among them. The quiet actor was certainly someone she wanted to count as her friend.
The tiring house door burst open and crashed back on its hinges.
“Take care!” Style protested. “That—” The rest of his sentence died on his lips as he saw who’d entered.
Leo.
Alice swallowed. If she’d felt hollow before, she was now full, with her heart taking up all the space inside her, its beat louder than a stampede of wild deer.
Leo filled the doorway, his hair in disarray, his eyes wild and piercing. It was enough to whisk her breath away.
“Can I get your lordship something?” Style said, bowing hurriedly. “An ale? Sweetmeats? There’s some bread some-where…” He trailed off when he noticed Leo’s attention was focused entirely on Alice.
She shivered beneath that stare. She thought she knew him but his expression was unreadable. All she knew was it was as dark as a pit and she was to blame for putting it there.
“Alice,” he said, voice low but somehow still booming. “We must talk.”
She tried to think of something to say to avoid him, but no inspiration struck her. Everyone’s gaze settled on her. They were waiting for her answer so she gave the only one a sensible girl could give.
“Upstairs.” She made her way up first.
“We’re just going to talk,” Leo said to someone. Her father? Will? All of them?
He followed her up then closed the door when they reached the room used for storing costumes and props. She moved to the table in the middle of the room but didn’t turn around. Looking at him would make it so much harder to say what needed to be said.
“Leo, you shouldn’t have come. There is nothing more to be said.”
“Bollocks,” he said quietly, ominously.
She half turned and saw that he was leaning against the closed door. The jagged ends of his hair hung over his forehead. Beneath it his eyes fixed on her, stripped her bare, and bore right through her. It allowed her to see into him, too, and what she saw almost broke her resolve.
There was no anger in him, just desolation. There was confusion too. He opened his mouth to speak but closed it again and simply shook his head. He blinked slowly, interminably, and drew in two deep breaths.
He came to her, stepping gingerly across the floor as if she were a deer and he the hunter, expecting her to
flee if he made any sudden moves. “I meant it,” he whispered. He stopped before her and raised a gloved hand to her cheek but didn’t touch her. The scent of leather filled her nostrils then was gone. He lowered his hand to his side. “I want to marry you.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“I…I just can’t.”
“That’s not a reason.”
She’d had the words in her head earlier. She’d repeated them over and over several times. Why couldn’t she remember them now when it mattered?
“I explained in the letter.”
“Is it because of the way I treated you? The things I said to you then disgust me now. I’m sorry, so very sorry, and I would do anything to take them back. Please, Alice. Please forgive me. Marry me.”
Oh God, don’t do this.
He pinned her with that intense stare of his. If only he would be aloof it would be so much easier. She hadn’t expected this intimacy. He was supposed to be full of bluster and bravado, not pleading and…lost.
She needed him to be distant or angry with her or she would be undone. There was one weapon she possessed that might convince him…
She crossed her arms and stepped back. Drew in a deep breath to steady her erratic heartbeat. “I got what I wanted. A shop of my own. You will keep your word, won’t you?” It hurt to say it but she had to. Had to do everything possible to get him to leave.
She’d rather have stuck a thousand needles into her flesh than see the shock on his face, the disbelief, then finally the horror.
His jaw dropped. His breath came in short, sharp bursts as if he couldn’t breathe. “Alice…what are you saying?”
She began to shake but willed herself to stop. She had to do this. For him. It was for the best. Absolutely, definitely for the best. He would thank her one day. “I’m sorry, Leo. You shouldn’t have come.”
“I…I don’t understand.” He reached for her but she stepped farther back. “What can I do to make you understand how appalled I am at my own behavior to you?”