This sounds as good to Tabasco as it would to any red-blooded male of any species, and he turns over the money to me.
“You only owe me five large,” I say. “I will invest the rest where it will do the most good.”
I do as I promise, and the next day I give them their very first wedding present, which is a thousand-dollar line of credit at Morgan the Gorgon’s Meat Market.
The Bitch by P. D. Cacek
Oh, God.”
Karin had heard Russ say those two words in a number of ways for a number of situations. It would be an explosive murmur while making love, a groan after she told a bad joke, or an epithet when he discovered a new oil spot on the driveway-but the way he said it this time sent a chill racing through her, freezing her hand halfway against her wineglass.
“Russ?”
His eyes moved slowly from some point over her right shoulder to her eyes, then down to his plate, his mouth set in a firm, bloodless line. Suddenly the restaurant’s ambient sounds-the quiet conversations from the other tables, the soft click and clatter of flatware against plates, the sweet, seductive music that hung in the air… all of it became a distraction as Karin leaned forward. “Russ, what is it?”
He looked up and said one word: “Lily.” The chill deepened.
“Shit.”
“Yeah.”
For the six months they’d been dating, Lily-the ex who wouldn’t go away-had been a constant, determined, and, up until that night, discreet rival for Russ’s affections… even though he’d made it clear to Karin that he no longer felt anything for the woman.
Karin believed him.
Lily, apparently, did not.
They’d be at a movie and-surprise-Lily would be sitting two rows back. They’d be at a party and Lily would be standing across the room, glaring at Karin until Russ turned around, at which time tears would magically form in her pale gray eyes and she’d leave in a flurry of weeping and garnered sympathy. For six months Lily would show up, accidentally, wherever they were. Karin should have expected it, but somehow, she thought tonight would be different.
“Ah, Jesus…”
Karin didn’t have to look, she knew when the air, suddenly scented with lilacs and musk, moved between them and the candle flame shuddered as a shadow fell across the table.
Russ shook his head. “Karin, this is Lily.”
Karin’s hand finally reached her wineglass as she looked up. Fragile was a term she heard most from people, including Russ, used to describe her. Broken was another, but from where she sat, looking up at the pale woman with thick black hair and bloodred lips, Karin couldn’t see it.
Except for the tears glistening in her eyes, and the flowing, über-feminine dress the color of ash, Lily seemed as hard-and invulnerable-as marble.
Smiling politely, Karin cleared her throat and nodded. “Hi.”
The sadness in Lily’s eyes crystallized momentarily when she glanced at Karin, before melting back into twin pools of dejection as she looked at the table.
“Oh,” she whispered, voice hoarse with emotion, “I see you’re having dinner.”
It was a flat statement that made Karin feel as if she’d done something horribly wrong… or simply was something horribly wrong. She lifted the wineglass and took a quick sip to wash the taste out of her mouth.
“Yes. The food’s very good here.”
Lily brushed at her coal-dark hair, dismissing Karin and her comment, before turning her full and undivided attention back to Russ.
“I always thought so; it was one of our favorite places.”
Russ made a sound that was halfway between a cough and groan. “We never ate here, Lily.”
“Oh?” Confusion deepened the slight-very slight-wrinkle between the woman’s eyes. “That’s strange… I thought we had. Well, we ate at so many good restaurants I guess I got…” She sighed and Karin fought the urge to applaud. “Anyway, I was just driving by and saw your car in the parking lot and thought I’d stop in. To say ‘hi.’ ”
Karin’s stomach tightened uncomfortably around the portion of the night’s meal that she’d already eaten. “How nice.”
Lily gave her a small, weak smile before utterly dismissing her. Again.
“You look good, Russell.”
“Thanks.”
“And you’ve put on some weight. She must be a good cook.”
The color deepened along Russ’s cheeks as the she in question finished off the wine in her glass and toyed with the idea of accidentally spilling the rest of the bottle down the front of Lily’s dress.
Russ grinned but pushed his plate away. “Is there something you need-”
“I saw Ben and Dee the other night,” Lily interrupted with the precision of a surgeon removing a tumor. “They said you seemed happy. Are you happy, Russell?”
Russ smiled at Karin and winked. “I’m working at it.”
“Oh, dear. That’s rather an evasive answer, isn’t it? You’re either happy or you’re not. You shouldn’t have to work at it, Russell.”
Despite the obvious chill that had descended, Karin felt a slow burn creep up along her throat, but managed-somehow-to keep her voice light. “Oh, I think Russ is doing okay in that department.”
“Really?” Lily said, then reached down and helped herself to the piece of roast beef on Russ’s fork.
He shook his head when Karin started to say something. Holding herself still, she watched the woman’s lips slowly part to reveal a set of strong white teeth that closed over the meat with a kind of predatory finality.
“Well.” Lily handed Russ back the empty fork and leaned over, kissing his cheek. “If you’re not going to invite me to join you… It was good seeing you again, Russell.”
Turning, she gave Karin one last withering, dry-eyed glare before walking away. Karin watched the rest of the performance-Lily wiped at her eyes a number of times between their table and the door-before she could force herself to look away. Russ was busy looking at nothing in particular.
“Join us?”
Russ was toying with his wineglass but never picked it up. “Sorry about that. Sorry.”
“Did she seriously think we were going to ask her to join us?”
“I don’t know, yeah… maybe. That’s just Lily being Lily.”
Karin poured another glass of wine and finished it in one long, continuous swallow.
He reached across the table to take her hand when she started to refill the glass. “Don’t. She was just trying to rattle you.”
“Well, it worked. How could she see your car? We parked in the back.”
“I don’t know… she has a way of doing things like that.”
“She’s… barged in on your other dates?” Karin did a quick mental rundown on the things Russ had told her about Lily and couldn’t remember that particular point of interest.
“What? Oh… no, no, but for the first couple of months after we broke up I’d go somewhere-to the market or hardware store or, even a fast-food drive-thru-and I’d see her. We wouldn’t talk or anything, but she’d be there. And when I’d get home, there’d be a message on my answering machine or a text message on my cell… We never actually spoke but she wanted me to know she was there… that she’ll always be there.”
Russ let go of her hand and finished his wine.
“And, in case you’re wondering why this happened tonight… I suspect it’s because I’ve been with you longer than any of the other…”
Karin took pity on him and nodded. “Six whole months, going on seven.”
“And that bothers the hell out of her… because this is real.”
She couldn’t say anything and it was probably just as well when, instead of letting the moment continue, he added:
“We started dating just a few months after her husband died and that was a mistake. She was so devastated by his death, so helpless…” He shrugged. “I don’t know, but she needed me and, I guess, I liked the feeling, so I stayed even after I knew the relationship wasn’t what
I wanted. A couple years into it and I’d really had enough and tried to break it off…”
Karin leaned forward but didn’t say anything. This was the first time she’d heard about that.
“She threatened to kill herself if I left. And… I believed her.”
“So you stayed.”
“For another eighteen months, and then… Christ, I couldn’t take it. She thought she had me so she felt she could do or say anything to belittle me and I’d take it. We were at an office party and my boss’s wife-who was a bit drunk and flirty at that point-was complimenting me on my suit when Lily walked up. ‘Oh yes, the poor man knew nothing about fashion or… much of any of the social skills until I showed him. He’s so helpless without me.’ ”
“Yikes.”
Russ nodded. “Yeah, and Lily made sure everyone in the room heard it. When I took her home… back to her home, that is, I told her how I felt and she laughed and said it was only a joke and she felt sorry for me if I didn’t know that. I walked her to her door, then turned around and left.”
“Wow.”
“I didn’t answer the phone for three days, and on the fourth, she showed up at my office in hysterics… making me the bully, of course. Then-Christ, I don’t want to talk about this anymore, okay?”
Karin nodded. She could get the rest of the story from friends. “Sure.”
They ate the rest of their meal making careful small talk about safe subjects and were laughing and holding each other as they walked to his car. But later that night, when they made love, Karin had the distinct impression that there was another person in bed with them.
A woman with long dark hair and sad gray eyes and sharp white teeth: a bitch in flowing sheep’s clothing.
“So… you met Lily?”
Karin could hear the pity in her friend’s voice and almost wished she hadn’t called. But what’s the use of having a girlfriend, especially a girlfriend who knows all the players and doesn’t have to be brought up to speed?
“Yes,” Karin said. “Yes, I did.”
“And?”
“Scary lady.”
“You think so?” Karin was a bit surprised by the comment. “I just think she’s sad. And, yeah, okay, maybe a little… pathetic. I mean, it has been three years. I keep telling her it’s time to move on.”
“You still talk to her?”
“Oh, sure. Ben and Russ worked together, so I knew Lily from the start and…” Her friend’s sigh echoed softly in Karin’s ear. “Well, she still calls sometimes to ask about Russ. Last night she was in tears, sobbing her heart out because she saw the two of you together and how could Russ go to their restaurant with another woman and-”
“It wasn’t their restaurant. Russ said-”
“-do this to her because she still cared so much. Yadda, yadda, yadda. Same song, different verse. Don’t let it get to you.”
Karin heard a snap and looked down at the broken mechanical pencil in her hand. “Uh-huh.”
“C’mon. It’s just her way of trying to get sympathy. I know she probably hoped I’d call Russ and tell him, but I told her to knock it off instead. She got real quiet and then hung up.”
“Why does the word ‘manipulation’ come to mind?”
“Yeah, but she’s just running scared. Ben and I haven’t seen Russ this happy in… a long time, and I’m sure Lily notices that, too.”
The mailbox icon flashed in the upper corner of her computer screen and Karin smiled. Russ liked to send her jokes or cartoons or just “Hi, miss you” messages to brighten her workday. Setting the broken pencil down, she clicked open the e-mail… and stopped smiling.
“Oh, joy.”
“I know.” Dee sighed. “But don’t let her get to you. It’s hard when someone won’t let go, but she’s really only hurting herself.”
“I know… and I can understand how Lily doesn’t want to give up. Russ is a wonderful man and I don’t intend to simply walk away.”
“It may get rough.”
Karin nodded and reread the message on her screen:
I simply don’t understand why you’re with him. You’re nothing. You’re average at best and Russell requires a woman who is much more than that. I’m saying this only as a friend, but if you continue to burden him with your presence, you’ll only bring him down to your level, and one day he’ll notice that and leave you. Show me I’m wrong. Leave him now and gain my respect-Lily
“Oh,” Karin said into the phone as she pressed the delete key, “there’s no doubt about that.”
“Excuse me?”
Russ smiled weakly. “She wants all of us to be friends.”
“And you know this because…”
“She called me at work this afternoon… weeping and asking me to forgive her for last night. She said she’d be happy and be able to get on with her life if we could be friends.”
Karin took a deep breath and pretended to think about it without adding any comment about aeronautically gifted swine. She also didn’t mention Lily’s e-mails-five in total, all along the same “you’re not good enough for him, leave now, you pitiful excuse for a woman” lines-or the phone message on her answering machine:
“I don’t think Russell will ever know just how much he meant to me… but he was my world and I-I-” (sound of weeping) “I hope you both know that I only want him to be happy. If not with me, then… I hope you can make him happy but I worry because he should have said that last night. If a man is happy, he wants to tell the world. Has he ever told you? He told me so many times how happy I made him… but he must have lied. He must still be lying-to himself. Please, Karin, call me and let’s talk. There are so many things you apparently don’t know about him… that only I can tell you. We need to talk. Please call. My number is-”
She’d erased the message and, just for the annoyance factor, turned off the machine before heading over to Russ’s for the night. The woman was obviously nuts… or not.
“The lady does get around…”
Russ stopped tearing lettuce apart and looked at her. “Excuse me?”
Karin shook her head and stole a grape tomato out of the bowl. “Nothing. So she wants us to be friends, huh? What did you tell her?”
He looked down so quickly Karin thought she heard his neck pop. “I… told her I’d ask you-but that I didn’t think it was a good idea.”
“Uh-huh.”
Russ finished dismembering the lettuce and picked up a homemade cheese crouton and held it out to her… an offering she couldn’t refuse.
One of the many things Karin loved about Russ was his skill in the kitchen. The man could cook, and while she managed well enough to keep from starving, her meals tended to be of the simple boil-in-the-bag variety. Russ, on the other hand, prepared real food, from scratch, using recipes that required more than “place in pot” and “turn on heat.”
If ever a man knew the way to a girl’s heart…
Karin sighed-a bad mistake, considering the mouthwatering aromas that filled the kitchen. She took the crouton and crushed it between her back teeth. “It’s not going to happen you know… the friends bit, I mean.”
“I know.”
“Then why didn’t you tell her?”
He shrugged. “I don’t want to hurt her any more than I already have. Lily may seem strong, but she’s not, Karin… not like you.”
Karin concentrated on chewing and swallowing and not destroying his obvious delusions about his fragile, broken, weak ex. “Yeah, well… I guess she’ll figure it out eventually.”
“Here’s hoping.” He leaned across the island counter and planted a kiss on her nose. “Now, how’d you like to do me a favor?”
Russ generally didn’t need any help when it came to cooking, so Karin had already toed off her croc sandals and had made herself comfortable on one of the counter’s tall bistro-styled chairs-where she could filch the occasional nibble while he worked. She was already looking for a glass when he picked up a wine bottle and upended it. A lone drop, the color
of ripe plums, landed on top of the lettuce.
“I thought I had another bottle of Cabernet when I made the dressing. How do you feel about running out and getting some wine? Do you mind?”
Karin snagged her purse off the back of the chair and slid her feet into the plastic shoes. “I can do that. Need anything else?”
“Not a thing. Thanks. Now scoot.”
She left him wreathed in a cloud of steam and paused only a moment to listen to the utterly domestic sounds coming from the kitchen. They were good sounds, echoes of hearth and home and refuge-sounds that she had missed and hadn’t even realized until that moment.
“I don’t hear the door closing,” he shouted, and it made her smile.
“Yes, sir. Right away, sir. At once, sir.” Karin stepped out into the bright late-summer evening and made sure the door banged shut behind her. Smiling, she walked past her car and continued down the drive to the sidewalk. It was too pleasant a night to drive the quarter mile to the wine-and-spirit shop.
One of the benefits, if there were any, of living in a “covenant-controlled planned community,” aka ‘acre-o-condos,’ was that there was always a strip mall within walking distance.
Not that many of the community-dwellers seemed to take advantage of it, as was evident by the number of cars that filled the parking lot. Their loss, she thought, and waved the right-of-way to a harried-looking woman in an SUV that could have housed a family of six, plus pets. Given the choice, Karin preferred feeling the ground beneath her feet.
He called her cell just as she’d finished signing the credit card receipt.
“You walked, didn’t you?”
“Can’t put anything over on you.” Mouthing her thanks to the salesclerk, Karin picked up the bagged wine and began weaving her way through the crowd to the door. “I won’t be five minutes… start dishing out the salad.”
Russ humphed through the phone. “Okay, but the wine’s supposed to breathe before it’s served, you know.”
“I’ll jog and we can give it CPR when I get there.”
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