by Zoe Matthews
She jumped into the small golf cart that she used to travel back and forth between the big house and the lodge and was soon parking it at the back entrance to the kitchen.
“Good morning, Kathy,” she called out with a wave as she headed towards the large staircase that led to the room upstairs she was currently sharing with Misty.
“Good morning, Stella. Busy day planned?”
“Not really. Sadie, Hunter, and Sierra are joining forces today and taking the guests on a family camping trip up at the lake. They’re taking care of their own meals for the next two days; that means I have a little time off. I thought maybe I’d take Misty and drive into town for the afternoon.”
“That sounds fun. Maybe you could pick up a few things for me while you’re there?” Kathy asked.
“Sure. I’d be happy to. Just make me a list and I’ll stop by and get it before we head out.”
“Thanks, Stella. That will save me a trip into town,” Kathy said with a smile.
Stella nodded and continued up the stairs. It was really no hardship to gather a few things while in town, and had become the common courtesy people living on the ranch extended to one another as it was over an hours’ drive into town – one way.
Stella opened the doors to her suite and then headed for the small sitting room and the sofa where Misty had been sleeping the past few nights. It wasn’t the ideal situation, and she and Sheridan had discussed getting some workmen in to make the sitting room another bedroom in the next few days.
“Hey, sleepyhead. Time to get up.” Stella pulled the curtains open and then turned, intending to wake up a sleeping child, but her bed was empty. She frowned and then stepped from the room and glanced at the open bathroom door. She wandered into her own bedroom, but Misty wasn’t there either.
The little girl had never voluntarily left these rooms without Stella or Sierra, so Stella was slightly worried that she’d done so now. She stepped back out into the hallway to see Sierra just emerging from her own rooms. “Have you seen Misty?”
“Not yet. Isn’t she still sleeping?” Sierra asked.
Stella shook her head. “No. I’m going to go see if she was already downstairs and I missed her.”
Sierra nodded. “Let me get the girls dressed and we’ll come down as well. Maybe she headed over to the lodge to find you?”
Stella doubted that but she’d check it out anyway. She went back downstairs and found Kathy in the kitchen with Annie. They both looked up at her, with Kathy frowning when she saw the worry of Stella’s face. “What’s wrong?”
“Misty’s not upstairs.”
“Misty is sad,” Annie told her with a nod of her head. The young woman had Down syndrome, and seemed to be more emotionally attuned to people, especially when they were sad.
“Yes, Misty’s sad. Annie, have you seen her this morning?” Stella asked the young woman.
“No,” Annie told her. “I saw Noah and Mason.”
“Where were they?” Stella asked, wondering if Logan’s two boys had seen Misty that morning.
“They were out by the horse thingy. Logan’s training a new horse.”
Stella smiled at the young woman and thanked her. “I’ll go take a look-see in that direction.”
To Kathy she said, “If she happens to show up here, would you keep her here and page me.” Stella grabbed one of the two-way radios and hooked it onto the waist band of her jeans. “I’ll let you know if I find her.”
“When you find her,” Kathy corrected her with a soft smile. “She’s around. Maybe she finally got curious about where she’s living to go exploring on her own.”
Stella nodded her head, hoping that was the case, but also hoping she hadn’t gone too far. “Maybe. See you later.”
“Bye, Stella,” Annie told her.
“Bye Annie. Be good,” Stella told Annie with a smile.
“I’m always good! Aren’t I Miss Kathy?”
“Yes, Annie. You’re always good. Why don’t we go look around and see if maybe Misty fell asleep in one of the other rooms?”
Stella heard Annie agree as the kitchen door shut behind her. She headed for the horse paddock, seeing Logan was indeed working with the newest arrival while his sons watched from the sidelines.
“Hey guys!” she greeted the two boys.
“Hi!” Noah said with his sweet smile.
“Hi, Miss Stella. Did you see the new horse dad got?” Mason asked as he pointed to his father. He was trying to guide a new bay horse around in a circle.
“I see. Is that a filly?” Stella asked the boys.
“Yep.” They all watched as Logan gently worked with her, getting her to accept his hand on her neck and then a loose rein lying across her back. Stella hadn’t ridden much before, but she had seen Logan work with horses all summer long, and she knew it would only be a matter of days or weeks before the new horse was completely broken and trustworthy. Logan seemed to be a miracle worker with horses, and she was glad he and her sister Sierra had found each other.
She thought back to a few weeks ago when they were married during their first large event, a good old-fashioned barn dance. It had been a quick event, but Sierra looked very happy. One of her other sisters, Sadie had married Hunter, her little girl’s father, a week later in a small private ceremony in the flower gardens Kathy worked so hard to perfect. She knew Stephanie and Bridger were planning to marry soon. Life had changed for so many of her siblings, and for herself over the last few months, and yet in some ways, so many things were the same.
Shaking her head to focus on the task at hand, she asked, “Have either of you seen Misty this morning?”
“She’s the new girl, right?” Noah asked.
“Yes. Have you seen her?”
Noah shook his head and then nudged Mason. “Have you?”
“Have I what?” Mason asked.
“Seen the new girl?” Noah told his brother. “Listen when people talk to you!” He shoved his brother on the shoulder, making Mason lose his footing on the fence and stumble a bit.
Mason countered by pulling Noah off the fence by grabbing him by the arm and yanking. “You listen!” he yelled.
“Boys!” Logan hollered over the ensuring scuffle a few moments later. “Stop! Now!”
Noah and Mason dusted themselves off, glaring at each other before turning their attention to their irritated father.
“Sorry.” They both mumbled before looking down at the ground.
Logan gave them both a stern look and then turned his attention to Stella. “Do I even want to know what started that?”
“Probably not,” Stella told him. “I was looking for Misty. She seems to be missing this morning.”
Logan immediately remembered another time when his own boys had come up missing. “I haven’t seen her, but the boys and I would be happy to help you search for her. Wouldn’t we, boys?”
“But dad…we haven’t even had breakfast yet,” Noah whined.
“You can wait a bit longer…” Logan started to say.
“No,” Stella interrupted him. “I’m sure she’s around here exploring. There’s no need to worry.” Yet! “I’ll take a look around the barns. If I need help looking I’ll let you know.”
“Are you sure?” Logan asked, stepping through the wooden rails to stand between his sons.
“I’m positive. Feed your young men breakfast. See you at dinner tonight boys. We’re having a barbeque on the patio.”
“Yay!” Noah hollered.
“Alright!” Mason yelled with delight. Both boys gave each other high fives. It was amazing how these two could be fighting one minute and best buds the next.
“I’m sure I’ll find her. Have a nice day.” Stella hurried away, not wanting to give into the irrational fear that was beginning to take over. Jenny had entrusted her to care for Misty, but she’d only made it a few days and the little girl was missing.
She’d let her family down by taking their mother away from them, she wouldn’t let Jenny down a
s well. She needed to find Misty. Now!
Chapter 8
Stella walked through the horse barn, but no one had seen Misty. She searched the fields and then headed toward the large red cattle barn closest to the big house. It was primarily used for birthing now-a-days, and since Cade had come on board, even that was done in the newest barn that had just been built at the end of the first pasture.
Cade loved working with the cattle and his collies. He had quite a reputation in Colorado for training expert cattle dogs, and prior to coming to the Majestic Mountain Ranch, had bred and trained many champion field dogs.
Stella also loved dogs and had learned quite a bit from Cade the past few weeks as she helped him work with the dogs. She’d been hoping to convince him to let her train one of the new puppies herself, but with the new responsibility of Misty, she’d not even asked. Misty needed her more than any puppy right now.
She entered the barn and started searching through the various stalls. She stopped when she heard the murmur of a small voice. A small female voice.
“You love your puppies, don’t you Trixie?”
Stella crept silently towards the rear stall where Cade had set up an enclosure to contain the small bundles of fur that were becoming expert escape artists.
She looked over the edge to see Misty, still clad in her princess pink nightgown, sitting amongst the straw and blankets with a lap full of puppies. Trixie laid on her side, allowing several of the pups to nurse, and keeping a watchful eye on the puppies that were licking Misty’s chin and pulling on the ends of her hair.
“I miss my mommy. She had to go to heaven and can’t be here anymore.”
Stella felt tears drip down her cheeks as she listened.
“My mommy used to let me sit on her lap and she’d read to me. She would wash my hair and then braid it for me.”
Stella’s heart broke and she backed away from the stall, needing to get ahold of her emotions before she tried to talk to Misty.
She continued to move backwards, coming up against a warm chest wall with a start. She whirled around to see Cade standing close enough that she could see the dark lines in his green irises. When he started to talk, she shook her head and pulled herself from his arms, walking hurriedly towards the entrance to the barn.
Once outside, she tipped her head back and willed her tears away. Cade joined her a few minutes later and asked, “Want to tell me what’s going on?”
Stella swallowed. “Misty wasn’t in her bed this morning when I went to wake her up. I found her in the stall with the puppies, talking to them.”
Cade smiled. “That’s a good thing, right?”
Stella nodded. “She was telling them how much she missed her mother.”
“Hence the tears,” he finished for her.
Stella nodded. “Yeah. She won’t talk to me, but she’ll talk to a group of little puppies. I don’t get it.”
“They can’t judge her. They can’t even give her empty assurances that things are going to be okay. They just listen, show puppy affection, and love her attention.”
“I don’t judge her!” Stella exclaimed.
“I didn’t say you did. But kids learn early on that they are judged by what they say or how they act. She doesn’t really know anyone here, and doesn’t feel comfortable enough to voice her emotions around us yet.”
Stella thought about that and then added, “At least she’s talking about her emotions. That’s a good sign, right?”
“I think so.” Cade was quiet for a moment and then asked, “Who did you talk to about your mother’s death?”
Stella looked up at him sharply. “What?”
“Who did you talk to about your mother’s death?” he repeated.
Stella shook her head. “No one. I mean, no one really wanted to talk about her, and about what I’d done. My mother died when I was born, and by the time I was old enough to realize what I’d done, everyone else had moved on. Sometimes Logan or Sierra would talk about a memory they had of her, but the rest of us were too young to remember much about her.”
“What you’d done?” Cade asked, narrowing his gaze at her in confusion, focusing on those few words she had accidently mentioned.
Stella sighed. “My mom died because I was born. I know everyone blames me…”
“How do you know that?” Cade countered quickly.
“Well…I mean…my dad never really wanted to do things with me. I know he blamed me for her death. And I never really got along with the others, until recently.”
“And why was that?” Cade countered, having grown tired of watching Stella carry a load of guilt for something that was entirely out of her control.
“We always seemed to end up in a fight. I would get mad and then they would get mad back,” Stella tried to explain.
“Who would get mad back?” Spencer asked, walking up behind Stella and Cade.
Stella turned and looked at her brother. “Cade’s asking questions about things that are better left alone.” She was starting to feel irritated with the conversation and was feeling defensive. She felt this subject was better left alone.
Cade shook his head and then told Spencer. “I’m only asking questions that should have been asked a long time ago. Did you know that your sister blames your mother’s death on herself?”
Spencer looked at Stella as if she were crazy. “What?! That’s ludicrous. Mom died because of an infection and losing too much blood. It had nothing to do with you.”
Stella shook her head at him. “Sure it did. She wouldn’t have lost so much blood if it weren’t for me. She only had to have a C-section because of me.”
Spencer looked at Cade and then grabbed his sister by the arm and pulled her a little bit away. “Do you mean to tell me that you’ve been feeling guilty for mom’s death all these years?”
“I am guilty!” Stella cried.
“No! You’re not! Mom died because of complications after childbirth. After! Not during. No one blames you.”
“Dad did,” Stella immediately countered back.
“No, he didn’t! That’s just dumb. Dad didn’t really interact with any of us. It was just the way he was.” He looked up as Cade walked up behind Stella.
“You need to realize you had nothing to do with your mother’s death. It’s no wonder you had so much trouble with your siblings growing up. You’re blaming yourself for something that isn’t true.”
Stella looked between Cade and her brother. Cade nodded his head and Spencer smiled at her. “It’s time to let the past go, sis. I wish I’d known you felt this way earlier.”
Stella swallowed and then she remembered the reason she’d come to the barn in the first place. “I can’t think about this right now. I need to get Misty.”
Spencer stopped her. “That’s why I came out here. Kathy said she went missing this morning.”
“She’s in the stall with the puppies,” Cade told him.
“Good! I was envisioning another full-scale search and rescue,” Spencer said, mentioning the time when Mason and Noah had run off the beginning of the summer.
Stella turned towards the barn. “What do I say to her?”
“You don’t have to say anything. Just be there for her and be willing to listen when she does start talking.” Cade took her hand. “Come on, I’ll go with you.”
“I need to get back to the big house and let everyone know she’s been found. Sis? We will talk about this some more. Count on it.” Spencer started to jog towards the family ranch house.
Stella ignored his veiled threat and headed back into the barn. She promised herself she would do her best to avoid that conversation and she hoped Spencer would forget what they had just talked about. She walked quietly beside Cade, stopping to peer over the edge of the stall at the sight below.
Misty had laid down on her side and was surrounded by small bundles of fur, fast asleep. The puppies had taken advantage of her warmth, and were snuggled up against her chest and legs, sleeping peacefully. Trixie la
id a few inches away, and Misty had one of her little hands resting on Trixie’s neck, connecting them all by touch.
“She looks so peaceful right now. I almost hate to wake her up,” Stella whispered to Cade.
“Then don’t. I have some work to do in the barn this morning. Let her sleep and when she wakes up, I’ll bring her to you,” Cade offered.
Stella was torn. She knew the little girl needed the rest, but she also needed to make sure Misty knew how worried she’d been about her.
“I’ll make sure she understands she needs to let someone know next time she leaves the house.” When he saw Stella’s hesitation, he added, “She’ll be fine. I’ll make sure of it.”
Stella sighed and then nodded her consent. “Thanks. I’m glad she’s okay. I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to her.”
“Nothing’s going to happen. What are your plans for the day?” he asked.
“I really don’t have any.” Stella told him about not having to cook for the guests for the next two days and he started to grin.
“Then you don’t have any excuses to not help me move the cattle to the west pasture,” he suggested with a grin.
Stella smiled. “As if you really need help. Those dogs of yours do all of the work.”
“I know,” Cade smiled at her. “And they only have to be pushed through the far fence line. It’s an easy move and you could bring Misty along and let her see how the dogs work.”
Stella nodded her head in agreement. She knew Misty would enjoy that. “Okay. I’ll make us some lunch to take with us. If I don’t see you after breakfast is finished, I’ll come collect her and get her dressed for the day.”
“No worries. We don’t need to leave for several hours yet.”
Stella thanked him and then headed back to the lodge. She was grateful that no harm had come to Misty, but troubled over her conversation with Cade and Spencer. Neither man seemed to think her mother’s death was her fault. But she’d lived with that concept for all of her twenty-four years. It wasn’t something she could just up and decide to change. It had contributed to so many facets of her life; it would take some serious thinking and willful actions to stop feeling guilty about her mother’s death.