by Rebecca Shaw
'I haven't the faintest idea. We are good friends, but she wouldn't tell me something like that would she? It's much too private.'
Whenjimbo met Peter the next morning he wasn't quite sure how to broach the subject. Then Peter himself mentioned Sheila Bissett, saying she'd resigned and how difficult it made things.
Almost as an aside Jimbo asked, 'Have you heard the rumour she's spreading as her revenge?'
'No. What is she saying?'
Jimbo stopped by a farm gate and leant on it. 'Let's have a rest before we turn back.'
Peter wiped the sweat off his face with the sleeve of his running shirt and said, 'Well?'
Jimbo, breathing heavily as much from the quandary in which he found himself as from the running he'd done, looked Peter straight in the face and came out with Sheila's malicious gossip.
'No good beating about the bush. I feel very awkward telling you this, but you've got to know. Sheila Bissett is spreading the story that your Beth and Alex are really yours and Suzy's . . . you know . . . that you well, you are their real father. That's why you're adopting them. There, that's it in a nutshell.'
Peter went pale, turned his head away from Jimbo's direct glance and said quietly, 'What's that old saying? "Be sure your sins will find you out."' He leant on the gate looking across the fields towards Sykes Wood. 'We
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didn't have an affair. It happened the week Patrick died. She was desperate for comfort and I have to admit I was stunned by her, quite stunned. Then I found out she was expecting twins and I thought it was the end of everything, my marriage, my vocation everything. Caroline was magnificent, said it wasn't to be allowed to make any difference to us. We were partners for life and she wouldn't permit something like that to separate us. What Suzy longed for and planned for, was that Caroline would want to adopt the twins, and that's exactly what she did want.'
Jimbo silently absorbed what Peter had said. God! What a situation. What was there to say? He waited a while for Peter to compose himself and then said in a matter of fact tone, 'Then you've nothing to fear: the two of you can stand together on this. I know in my heart that the whole village will be behind you. They don't like Sheila Bissett, but they do love you and Caroline.'
'I promised Suzy faithfully that we would never disclose the truth, just as she promised us that she would never tell, either. How has the woman found out?'
'She's put two and two together and made five. That's what.'
'I must get straight home.' Peter turned away from the gate and set off at such a cracking pace that Jimbo couldn't keep up. When he got back to the Rectory, Peter went straight up to the bathroom for his shower. He arrived in the kitchen for his breakfast already dressed in his cassock for the regular Friday morning school assembly in the church.
'Sylvia, do you think you could leave Dr Harris and me for a moment, I need to speak to her about something.'
'Of course Mr Harris, I'll just get on making the beds. Your eggs are ready.'
'Thank you.'
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Caroline, who was loading the washing machine, reminded him to ask Michael Palmer about the children doing some singing in the church on the day of the festival.
'Caroline come here.'
'I really am busy, Peter. I shall have to start bathing the twins soon and I've the drier to empty and a thousand other things to do. Can't it wait?'
'No, it can't. Please come here and sit down.'
'Be quick then.' She sat on the edge of the chair ready for immediate flight.
'My darling girl, the one thing I don't want to do is to hurt you any more than I have done already. God knows I've done enough damage one way and another, but there's something I must tell you. You know we promised that we would never explain about the twins? Suzy promised and we did for everybody's sake. Well, I'm afraid that someone has put two and two together and arrived at the conclusion that they are mine.'
'Oh please God, no. Oh no.' Tears began brimming in Caroline's eyes and she got out her handkerchief to wipe them away. 'Are you sure?'
'We should have known we couldn't get away with it. We should have been honest from the start.'
'C ... c ... c ... could we deny it?'
'That wouldn't be right would it, not in the long run?'
'No, it wouldn't. Oh, just when everything was going so well. Just when I was beginning to feel like a normal woman instead of a peculiarity.'
'Was that how you felt?'
'Yes.' Caroline wiped away the new tears beginning to run down her cheeks. 'The barren woman syndrome, you know. I was beginning to forget. What the hell are we going to do?'
'I've not had time to think. Jimbo's just told me.'
'How doesjimbo know?'
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Peter finished buttering his toast before he told her, 'Because Harriet overheard someone talking in the Store.'
'Then they all know.'
'Yes, I'm afraid so.'
'Who started it?'
'Sheila Bissett.'
'1 might have known. I've never liked that woman, always pretending to be something she isn't. Now she's really done for us. What are we going to do?'
'Go and have it out with her.'
At that moment the door bell rang and Caroline composed herself and went to answer it. Jimmy Glover was standing on the step holding a plastic carrier bag.
'Morning, Dr Harris. Thought you might like a couple of rabbits for the pot. Fresh this morning they are and I've dressed 'em all ready like. There's nothing to do "cept rinse 'em and pop 'em in the pot. Rector'll like a bit of rabbit I expect.'
'That's very kind of you, Jimmy. Can I give you something for them?'
'Not at all, Dr Harris, they're a gift from me as a thank you for all you and the rector do for the village. We all appreciate you both and them babies. Good morning.' Jimmy raised his foul old cap and stepped briskly off across the road back to his cottage.
She closed the door and tears came into her eyes again. He hadn't said anything specific, but she knew what he meant.
'Peter that was Jimmy Glover with two rabbits for us. He knows and he's trying to tell us he doesn't mind. Isn't he lovely?'
'Yes, he is. I wouldn't have thought it of old Jimmy. Rascal that he is. That will test the cook tonight. I bet you've never cooked rabbit before have you?'
'No, but I'll get Sylvia to give me some ideas. It
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doesn't help what's happened though does it? What shall we do? I'm so upset.'
'I'm going to see Sheila Bissett straight after I've taken the school assembly. I've got to face her with it and get the matter cleared up. We can't have it festering away for ever.'
'You've got more courage than I have.'
'Well, in my book it has to be done.' Peter drained his cup and then said, 'Must be off. Don't worry about it too much my darling, I'll get it sorted out. We'll have a difficult few days but there'll soon be something else for people to talk about.'
When the school assembly was finished Peter lingered in the church for a while. The prospect of facing Sheila Bissett was causing him anguish. One of the reservations he had had about taking on the twins had been this very thing. Maybe in the long run being completely truthful, after Suzy had left, would have been the better course of action. He'd dreaded the hurt Caroline was now feeling, to say nothing of how he felt. One mistake, just one fall from Grace and he was still paying for it. Rightly so, but Caroline shouldn't have to pay too. The children were flesh of his flesh and he was bound by ties he never knew existed before they were born. He'd even found that he would kill for them rather than have them hurt in any way. For a man who claimed to be a pacifist that was a strange thing to discover about oneself. Waiting for the adoption papers to be processed was torment. Caroline felt so certain that it would all go through without a hitch, but he lived in dread until it had all been signed and sealed. For Caroline's sake he had to find the right words. He knocked on Sheila's door and waited for a reply. Sheila opened it and look
ed defiantly at him.
'Good morning, Rector. You've managed to call then at last.'
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Peter looked down at her and gave her a tentative smile. 'Good morning. May I come in for a moment Lady Bissett?'
'You may.'
He followed her into the sitting room. She indicated the sofa with a nod of her head. Peter clasped his hands and took a deep breath.
'It has come to my notice, Lady Bissett, that a rumour is going round the village to the effect that Alexander and Elizabeth are my children by Suzy Meadows.'
'Is there?' Momentarily, Sheila looked uncomfortable and then defiant.
'I can't deny it, because it is the truth. I won't go into the circumstances which brought it about, but I will say this; my wife, the one person in the world who should have felt entitled to take her revenge on me, in fact did not do anything of the kind. When she found out that Suzy couldn't keep her twins, Caroline asked to adopt them, as much for my sake as for her own. As you know she can't ever be a mother herself, but out of some great store of compassion, she decided that adopting the twins would make everything right for everyone. Suzy wanted that too. If Caroline can find such love and understanding when she has the most right to feel deeply hurt, is it not possible that you could find it also?'
Sheila didn't answer.
'I have no right to ask for sympathy for myself, but perhaps I have a right to ask for it for Caroline.'
Still Sheila didn't answer. With her hands resting on her lap she sat staring at Peter, waiting for him to continue.
'There really isn't anything else to say. I hope that you can find it in your heart to show some of the compassion which Caroline has shown me, and that you will endeavour for her sake not to make life more difficult for her than it is. Please don't encourage the gossip, that
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wouldn't be right, but put the situation in the best light that you can?'
'I like your wife, and in the circumstances I wouldn't want to make matters worse for her. But it's only for her sake not yours. You can't be forgiven for what you have done, not a man in your position. Just as you can't be forgiven for letting me resign.'
'With regard to your resignation, we run the Flower Festival through the committee and the others didn't want all white displays. We did decide democratically, Lady Bissett. I'm only sorry that we have not the opportunity to benefit from your flair and expertise. I have been giving the matter some thought and I wondered if you might like to put some all white displays in the church hall? Everyone will be going in there for refreshments and will have plenty of opportunity for seeing the displays. The hall is rather bare as it is now isn't it?'
'Would I have a free hand?'
'Absolutely.'
'Then I shall be in charge of the church hall flowers on the day.'
Peter stood, and so did Sheila. He took her hand and, looking straight into her eyes, thanked her for her understanding and told her that there were few people in this world who could have overlooked the committee's decision with such generosity of spirit. Sheila found herself blushing with delight. She squeezed his hand and assured him of her intention to make a real success of her task. 'You won't regret asking me, Peter. And I'll remember about Caroline.'
'Thank you, Sheila. Thank you.'
Caroline, knowing she must be brave and go out to meet people, set off for a walk with the twins on the pretext that they wouldn't settle so she thought perhaps an outing in the pram might get them both to sleep. Pat Duckett was
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leaving her cottage on her way to get ready for school dinners. She called across to Caroline, 'Morning Dr Harris. Isn't it lovely? Just right for getting the twins a breath of air. Aren't they corning on?' She poked her head in the hood and tickled Beth and then Alex under their chins. 'You two be good for your mum. My they are looking great. You must be so proud of'em.'
'Yes, lam, Pat.'
'Bye then, I must be off. I tell you what, I wish you'd bring them in for the children to see. I'll ask Mr Palmer if it's all right shall I?'
'I don't think he'd want me coming into school.'
'He would if I asked him. Walk round with me and I'll ask him now. Come on. No time like the present.'
The children were delighted. They asked her questions about how the babies could be twins when they were a boy and a girl. Caroline explained as best she could. They all wanted to cuddle them, and eventually when the twins started getting fractious, Caroline said she must be going. Michael Palmer came to the gate with her.
'You and Peter have their loyalty, you know. Never doubt that.'
'Thank you, Michael, very much.' She smiled at him, trying hard not to let him see how much she was affected by their kindness.
When she called in the Store to do a bit of shopping she found Harriet deep in conversation with Venetia.
'Why, hello, Caroline,' Venetia enthused. 'How lovely to see you. When we have our opening night will you and Peter be able to attend? I wondered if he would take the first swim in the pool that night as a way of celebrating our little enterprise? He's such a good advertisement for a healthy body.'
'Oh come on, Venetia, let it rest. There's plenty of other men who could do that for you with a lot more verve and sex appeal than Peter.'
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'I tell you what, after the rumours I've heard this morning, I realise now why you're so touchy about him. I think it's very courageous of you to take on those twins. Not many women would do it.'
'I'd better leave, Harriet, before I say something I shall regret. I'll come back later when you have more time.' And Caroline opened the door wide and pushed the pram out, blinded by tears she was determined not to let Venetia see.
Harriet exploded. 'How dare you make a remark like that? How dare you?'
'I was complimenting her on her courage.'
'Complimenting her? Oh, so that's what you call it. We are all very upset about this nasty gossip that Sheila Bissett has been spreading and we're standing behind them both on this. There was no need for you to say what you did. I'm so mad I think we'd better postpone our discussion to another day. If indeed I ever feel like discussing it with you ever again.'
'You're letting sentiment get in the way of business Harriet. Jimbo wouldn't let that happen. Have it your own way. Perhaps Jimbo has more of a business brain than you. I ought to have known.'
She tripped out of the Store leaving Harriet fuming at the woman's lack of sensitivity. She went through to the back office in search of someone to whom she could let off steam.
'Jimbo, where are you? Isn't he back yet Mother?'
Sadie looked around and said, 'No, he isn't. She's right you know. You did let your feelings get the better of you. No one can afford to turn business away nowadays.'
'You agree with what she said then?'
'No, but it is a free country.'
'Not in our Store it isn't.'
*
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Peter found Caroline in the kitchen with Alex and Beth fast asleep in their pram.
'Sorry it's taken me so long to get back I . . .'
'Shush . . . keep your voice down. I've just got them to sleep. What did she say?'
'Sylvia in?'
'No, she's having some time off. How did you get on?'
'Reading between the lines, Sheila had been expecting me to go round the morning after the Flower Festival to apologise and agree to her all white job. When I didn't go, she decided to get her own back. I have unashamedly used every trick in the book to persuade her of the error of her ways. I told her she was quite right, that Alex and Beth are mine, but that we had decided to say nothing both for the children's sake, for Suzy's and for yours. It seemed the best of all the options. So we've come to a compromise. She's apologised to you through me, I've apologised for the Flower Festival Committee being a bit high-handed and disregarding her wishes, and in return she's doing flower displays in the church hall where we shall be serving refreshments all day. I've no doubt they will be so
magnificent we shall be able to charge for visiting the hall as well. So honour is satisfied all round.'
Thank God for that. I feel shattered about it all. You were quite right, we couldn't really expect to keep it a secret. Let's hope it's a nine days wonder. I've received nothing but kindness from everyone, except from Venetia Mayer. The woman is totally lacking in tact. She could cause a lot of trouble for you, Peter. Apparently she wants you to be the first to dive into the pool at the Health Club on opening night. Something about you being an "excellent advertisement for a healthy body".'
'Oh help, what will the woman think of next? I'm glad Jimbo's running with me at the moment. At least there's safety in numbers!'
'I think maybe we shall weather the storm. Do you?'
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'Yes, 1 do. You don't regret adopting Alex and Beth, do you Caroline?'
'Never for one moment. Except sometimes in the night when I've had hardly any sleep then 1 do wonder if I'm right in the head. But not seriously.'
'I love you, my darling.*
'And I love you too.'
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Chapter 7
When Peter heard the heavy hammering on the rectory door he knew it was Willie. Willie always knocked as though there was a major emergency on hand. He opened the door to find his verger standing on the step holding a large box full of plants.
'You're looking very smart today Willie. I hardly recognised you.'
'Thank you sir. Thought I'd spend a bit of money and get done up.'
'You've certainly got done up and no mistake. If I didn't know better I'd think you were courting. I assume those plants are for me. Are you staying to put them in?'
'Well I could, sir, if you like. I'm not dressed for it, but I don't mind.'
'I'm going to get Sylvia to make me a coffee. My wife's taken the twins for their injections this morning so Sylvia's in charge. Come into the kitchen and we'll get her to make one for you as well.'
'Right, thank you Rector, I will.'
The two of them went into the kitchen to find Sylvia almost hidden behind a pile of ironing.
'You know Willie our verger, don't you Sylvia?'