Still…
“Then you are going to waltz into that Interstellar Brides Processing Center and you are going to demand to speak to someone in charge.”
“Why?”
“Because, love, this baby does have a father. And he has a right to know.”
“Oh God.” I’d only been thinking about myself. How was I going to deal with this? What was I going to do? How much I missed Braun. I’d been so busy imagining him with someone else that I hadn’t thought about telling him. “You’re right.” Braun was gone, but he was a good man… alien… male. Whatever. He was good and honorable and gentle. He would be an amazing father. But… “What if they make me give up the baby?”
Casey’s arm squeezed me again. “Well, if the child is an alien who can turn into a beast, would the little one really be able to live here, on Earth?”
“No. No. That’s not fair. But I’m not sending my child into outer space.”
“You could go out there. Maybe find another mate? Another Atlan to help you raise the baby?”
I wanted Braun. But he wasn’t an option. Maybe I could find another guy. Another gorgeous Atlan who made me hot and made me laugh.
“I could ask.” But I didn’t want to. I wanted Braun.
The tears burst from me like I hadn’t cried in years. Casey held me. And when I lifted my face to look up into his eyes, I didn’t even try to hide my pain. “I don’t want to do that. I want him.”
“I know. I’m so sorry, love.” He leaned down and pressed his forehead to mine for a brief moment before placing a lingering kiss there as well.
He was right. What if my baby was a boy? A little Atlan beast? What if he changed into a beast in school? Hurt someone? I had no idea what might happen. I didn’t know how big the baby would be, how long I would be pregnant. Nothing. I knew nothing.
I had to go to the processing center and send word to Braun somehow. I needed medical information. Advice. A checkup. I needed to know what to expect, what had happened to other human women who had Atlan babies. Surely I wasn’t the only one.
But none of that was going to happen tonight. I lay my head on Casey’s shoulder and reached for the remote.
“What do you want to watch?” he asked.
“Anything but romance.” I grinned through my tears and grabbed the ice cream. “Sci-fi? Let’s watch some badass marines kill some aliens.”
Casey chuckled and I felt almost normal. Almost.
Braun, Outside Casey’s Apartment
I covered the distance to door number four in record time. These dwellings were in better repair than the building Angela lived in. I assumed that meant the humans who lived here had more wealth. Number four was on the ground floor, and I was grateful not to have to face the bleak gray stairwell just a few steps away. I hadn’t been given any updates as to the repercussions of the thieving human’s death, although I had to assume Angela had been cleared of all responsibility. I should have asked, but my beast had been impatient to leave for Earth.
Since the warden had brought me here instead of a jail cell containing my female, I assumed all was well. If Angela had been incarcerated, I would have snapped the bars and taken my mate from the building. Once she was on The Colony, Earth laws would not be an issue.
The light was on in the apartment, the golden beam coming through the large window that was to the left of the entry door. I paused on the threshold when I saw her. Fuck, she was more beautiful than ever. Her dark hair was pulled back from her face, and she was in a simple shirt and shorts as she sat upon a large sofa. She was looking at something in her hands, lifted a spoon loaded with a dark and creamy food to her mouth.
I’d never before wished to be a spoon.
I took one more step toward her, hand raised to pound on the door, then froze.
She wasn’t alone. A golden-haired man came from the kitchen, smiling. He carried two drinks and said something I couldn’t hear through the glass. Coming up behind her, he kissed the top of her head. She turned and smiled up at him. I saw trust in her gaze. Affection.
He kissed the top of her head.
After, he dropped down on the couch beside her and set the beverage he’d been carrying for her on the table before them. She looked unhappy, no joy or pleasure on her face as she turned to him for comfort. She leaned forward and set whatever she was eating next to her beverage.
Then the male leaned in close, wrapped his arm around her shoulder, and she settled against him like she belonged there as he stroked her arm. As she allowed him to hold her.
Just as she had with me.
The male nuzzled her hair with his lips and placed another kiss there. And another on her forehead. Their faces touched, and he was looking deeply into her eyes, their discussion obviously intimate and very personal. Familiar.
Fuck.
By the gods, she’d chosen another.
My beast broke. For the first time in years I felt no rage, no fire burning in my veins.
Nothing. I was a stone statue. Cold. Empty. Without hope.
The man huddled close and looked down at her lap and she cried. Something was hurting our female, and she turned to this male for comfort and protection.
Him. Not me.
My beast roared to break down her entry door and rip the man’s head off, just as I’d done with the Hive a short time ago.
She was mine.
Mine!
Yet I had been gone for over two weeks. I hadn’t said goodbye. Hadn’t made my intentions known. Clearly she had found another. I continued to watch as they huddled together and chose a vid to view on the human’s television.
Angela wasn’t upset I’d left her. She had laughed. She was smiling. Cuddling.
With. Another. Man.
I turned away, unable to look at the scene inside the apartment a second longer. I could knock, tell her she was mine, but I would not tear her from her happiness, even if it wasn’t with me.
This man made her smile. He kissed her freely. He was human and here. To be with me she would be forced to leave the planet. Leave her parents and the grandfather she loved with every ounce of her heart. This human could give her that.
I was just a beast who killed Hive. Whose beast was done being held back. I was finished penning him in. For years—years—I’d kept the beast under control. No longer.
I would not let Angela see me like this. My beast did not rage; he broke open.
No, she’d made her choice, and it wasn’t me.
I strode down the steps and back to the warden’s vehicle. Tucked myself into the seat beside her.
“What’s wrong?”
“She’s found another.”
I looked blindly out the front window.
“Another? Another Atlan? Impossible.”
“No. A man. A human male with golden hair. He was kissing her.”
She whispered under her breath. “You’re sure?”
I looked to the woman who’d been so helpful. “Yes. Quite.”
She sat and stared at me, but I could tell she was thinking hard.
I was numb. My beast was taking over more and more by the second. I had to remain in enough control so I could fit within her vehicle. If I grew to my beast size, I would have to punch out the roof.
“You can go in and talk to her. Ask her. Make sure. There has to be some mistake,” she said.
“No.”
“Tell her how you feel.”
“No.”
“Warlord,” she all but begged with that one word.
“She has moved on and so must I,” I replied. “This human can make her happy. She can remain here, on Earth, with her family. I cannot offer her such comforts.”
She sat quietly for another moment. “You wish me to take you back to transport?”
“Yes.”
She turned the vehicle on, then pulled out of the lot, returning the way we’d come. I’d had hope on the journey here, but now that hope was gone.
“I’ll have you back to The Colony s
oon,” she murmured, her voice soft.
“No. I wish to be transported directly to Atlan. To the prison. It is over. It is time I faced the truth. I will follow the same path as my father.”
“You don’t have to die!” she exclaimed, stopping at a traffic light.
“I am an Atlan. I have mating fever. I have no other options.” I held up my cuffs, the ones that should be around Angela Kaur’s wrists. “I lost my mate. I’ve made my choice. My beast has chosen as well. There is no other possibility for me now but execution.”
15
Angela, Interstellar Brides Processing Center, Miami
The walls were thick like concrete slabs that absorbed sound. The air smelled strange, a mix of batteries and cleaning supplies mixed with chalk. Maybe it was my pregnancy nose that picked up on the odd combination. The receptionist in the lobby had been nice enough. Still, I had no idea what to expect as I waited in the small meeting room, but it was not the unfriendly female who entered.
She looked human. But then, did that mean she actually was? I had no idea. Other than what I’d seen on the Bachelor Beast television show, I had no idea what was going on out in space, who was there or what kinds of aliens existed. Not once had I considered volunteering to be a bride. So, like most humans, I’d pretty much ignored everything to do with aliens and war and brides. I had enough problems at home. Like a sick grandfather and parents who depended on me. Nursing school. Work.
And now… a baby. An alien baby.
“Ms. Kaur. I am Warden Egara. I am in charge of bride processing here in Miami. Why are you here?” She was beautiful, probably in her late twenties with dark brown hair and startling gray eyes. Her gaze was direct. Intelligent. The look of someone used to being in charge and making difficult choices. But the way she had her arms crossed over her chest made it clear she wasn’t eager to see me. Maybe she’d had a rough day, I had no idea, but I got not-happy-to-see-me vibes.
Her gaze narrowed when I hesitated. “I don’t have a lot of time. What do you want from me?”
Yeah, not happy to see me. I blinked, taken aback by her open hostility. “I’m sorry?”
“Why. Are. You. Here? Do you wish to volunteer to be processed as an Interstellar Bride?”
I frowned. “No.”
She sniffed and rested her hands on the back of a chair, but did not bother sitting down. I wondered if it was because she never sat, didn’t want to wrinkle the dark gray uniform skirt she wore, or because she simply didn’t like me. Which made no sense. I had never met the woman.
Gray eyes focused on me like lasers, and I started shaking. Again. Tears were coming, too. I could feel them, but I swallowed hard and forced them back down. “I… I need your help. I need to get a message to an Atlan. Warlord Braun? Do you know him? Know where he is?”
“Indeed.” She crossed her arms again, still scowling. “What kind of message?”
My hand dropped to my abdomen as if I instinctively knew I needed to protect my baby from this mean woman. This was who they had greeting nervous new brides? This was the last face one would see before being whisked away into outer space?
No wonder they had so many advertisements on television and the Internet. No wonder they were seeking volunteers by showing off a hot alien first. Warden Egara was a scowling, mean, unhappy bitch. Yet she was my only chance to reach Braun, to let him know about our baby.
“I need to talk to him. I know—” I held up my hands to interrupt her when she opened her mouth to speak, and rushed the words out of my mouth before I lost my courage. Again. I had driven here three times in the last two days. Pulled up. Parked. Turned my car back on and gone home. I had never been such a coward in my entire life. But this was scary. An alien baby. Alien lover who didn’t want me. Not knowing if I’d be able to stay on Earth. Not knowing anything.
“Please. Let me get this out.”
Warden Egara looked down her nose at me from where she stood, but my knees were too weak to risk standing. I was shaking like a leaf.
“I know Warlord Braun found his one true mate and left Earth. I know. He came to my apartment with his mating cuffs on and said he needed to tell me something but didn’t get the chance. He’s gone. He found a mate. I heard them talking about it on the show. I don’t expect him to want me back, because he’s happy on The Colony or Atlan or wherever. I’m happy for him with this female. I might not look it, but I am. He deserves it. But that’s not why I’m here.”
The warden opened her mouth again, but I spread my palm wide in front of her face and rushed the rest of the words out. “I know. He’s gone. It’s fine. I’ll deal with it. But… but I’m pregnant. The baby is his. I know he has a real match now and he went to meet her and claim her. I don’t expect him to be mine. But he’s a good man—Atlan—whatever. Braun is good. He has a right to know he’s going to be a father.”
I stumbled over all of that and took a deep breath. There, I’d done it. Shared the whopping secret that would probably end with me locked up in Area 51.
“What?” Her voice had lost some of its edge, but what did she mean, what? Was I stuttering?
“You do speak English, right?”
Her brows came together. “Of course.”
I spoke slowly, just in case she was a bit dense today. “I. Am. Pregnant. With Braun’s baby. Okay? I took three tests to be sure. I know he has a mate now. I know he was matched. But he needs to be aware of the baby. And I need to know what to expect. This baby is half human and half Atlan. Will they let me raise my child here? On Earth? How long will I be pregnant? Is it forty weeks gestation, like a human baby? And will I be able to deliver the baby? How big will it be? I’m almost done with nursing school, but none of my textbooks or clinicals cover this. If we stay on Earth, will the baby turn into a beast? Will Braun have visitation rights? How will this work? And what if his new mate doesn’t accept this? I don’t want to expose my baby to someone who won’t love him.” There. I’d said it again, even more in depth. She had to understand now. That about did it, right? “Or her. It could be a girl. I don’t know yet.”
“What?” she asked again. All anger slipped from her face, and she just looked shocked. Yeah, a human having an alien baby was a surprise.
She sank into the chair next to mine on one side of the small meeting table and took my hand in hers. Her entire demeanor changed from wicked witch to caring friend. I blinked with confusion but didn’t pull my hand from hers when she spoke again. “Angela, I think we got off on the wrong foot. For that, I’m sorry. Start from the beginning and tell me everything.”
I didn’t tell her everything, but I told her enough. She knew how I got pregnant, I was sure. When I was done, she was leaning back in her chair, arms crossed, the angry glint back in her eyes. “You’ve left out something important.”
I stared at her, confused. “I did?” What? I had no idea.
“What about the man you were with three nights ago? The blond? First floor. Number four.”
What the hell was she talking about? “You mean Casey?”
“Is that his name? Your lover? The man you ran to with your troubles. The man who was holding you? Kissing you when Braun came to find you?”
I stared. And stared. Processed. Freaked. “Braun came back for me?” My heart leaped, and my pulse pounded. “Why? Why did he come back?”
“There was finally an open transport window. He came back to claim you, Angela. And found you with another man. You betrayed him.”
“Casey is not a man!” I shot out of the chair. This time it was me looking down my nose at her. “I mean, he’s a man, but not my man. How dare you? Casey is my best friend. He’s been my best friend since the fifth grade. And he’s not my lover. He’s gay!”
She pursed her lips. “Then why did he kiss you?”
I was going to punch her in her perfect little nose. That’s what I was going to do. “He kissed me on the forehead! We watched sci-fi movies and ate ice cream while I cried my eyes out because my alien lover has found
a mate and I’d never see him again. Oh, and I was carrying his baby! Let me tell you, I needed that fricking ice cream. I love Braun. I did not betray him! I love him. Why?” I all but moaned. “Why would he think that? Why didn’t he stay and talk to me? Ask me?”
Her face leached of color. “Oh, dear.”
“He was here? And he didn’t talk to me? Didn’t even ask?” I shoved the chair out of my way and took a step closer to her. “You were there, too. Weren’t you?”
“I drove him to your place.”
“And you didn’t talk sense into him? Or look into that fucking window yourself?”
She stood and began pacing. “I’m sorry, Angela. Atlans, especially those in mating fever, do not always see reason.”
“But he has a mate. He left to meet her.”
She shook her head. “He met his mate, yes. You. He went to your apartment to claim you, but there was the incident with your ex. He was deported from the planet.”
“They said he found a mate! That he was matched.”
“He was. You are his mate,” she said again.
Oh. My. God. “Call him. Comm him! Whatever you aliens say. Right now. Tell him the truth.”
She shook her head. “I can’t.”
“Why not?” Whatever. I didn’t care how, I just needed to talk to him. Now. “Then send me to The Colony. I’ll talk to him myself.”
“I’m so sorry. When he saw you with the other man—well, he didn’t go back to The Colony.”
A sick feeling twisted in my gut as the dramatic advertisements for the Bachelor Beast program appeared in my mind. The show had made a very big deal about the fact that an Atlan warlord who failed to find his mate was executed. Find love or be put to death. It was so dramatic. So fantastical.
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